Not Mamas... Yet Tribe, Part XVII (Winter 08/09) - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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Old 12-15-2008, 02:57 PM
 
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Thanks tippy! That makes me feel better. I just sent the email, and then I think you were posting this at the same time. I feel better though, because I wrote something along the same lines of what you said. I think it's pretty funny that I asked about this on here, cause it's really not that big of a deal, but at the time, it seems like it, ya know? ...and I always get scared that people are going to get really mad at me.....and take away my birthday...or something like that.

Here's what I wrote:


Hi Christina,

I actually won't be able to babysit on Tuesday.

Also, I'm really sorry, but I don't think I'm going to be able to babysit for you in the future either. I love your family, and you've been nothing but nice, but the truth is, Jordan can really stress me out. I have some issues with anxiety (physical symptoms with my hands) that I'm really working to lessen/eliminate, especially since we've recently decided to start trying to have a baby, and at this time, it's just really not healthy for me.

This is hard for me to do, and I'm sorry for the inconvenience.


Wishing you the best,

Alisha
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Old 12-15-2008, 05:21 PM
 
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WE DID IT WE DID IT WE DID IT!!! : :

Yay!!!! ::

treehugger.gif SAHM with a precious toddler and the love of my life, expecting a new little one July 2014!
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Old 12-15-2008, 08:23 PM
 
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So I just called and made an appt. for "preconception visit." I was a little disappointed because the receptionist wasn't really sure what I was talking about. I've read about making an appt. like that (on here, and other sites) and I thought it would be a little more well known. Now I'm kind of scared of getting there and them being like "uh, what exactly do you want?" There is one midwife that works there, but she only meets with you if you're already pregnant. (& that's the only midwife in my town!)

I'll let you know how it goes. It's on Wednesday.


Has anyone else done this before?
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Old 12-15-2008, 11:23 PM
 
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WE DID IT WE DID IT WE DID IT!!! : :
yay!!!!!: i'm so happy for you
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Old 12-15-2008, 11:32 PM
 
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So I just called and made an appt. for "preconception visit." I was a little disappointed because the receptionist wasn't really sure what I was talking about. I've read about making an appt. like that (on here, and other sites) and I thought it would be a little more well known. Now I'm kind of scared of getting there and them being like "uh, what exactly do you want?" There is one midwife that works there, but she only meets with you if you're already pregnant. (& that's the only midwife in my town!)

I'll let you know how it goes. It's on Wednesday.


Has anyone else done this before?

Who did you make an appointment with? Family doctor? ObGyn? Midwife? :

I've never heard of a preconception appointment. At my regular physicals, my family doctor has asked me about my plans though, and basically just told me to start taking prenatals before TTC.

Mommy to  N baby.gif, born 2/20/12.

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Old 12-16-2008, 01:43 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Jessica, that's awesome. I'm glad you guys were able to get through it. heres to doin' it.
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Old 12-16-2008, 02:27 AM
 
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Kyamo: It was an "Ob/gyn Midwifery Center" I think it's like the hospitals birthing center and it has 1 midwife.
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Old 12-16-2008, 06:11 PM
 
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Independant midwives are probably more accustomed to such visits.
I think they can be valuable for people who want to conceive. I would be interested in addressing fertility issues, screening for STIs, discussing nutrition, checking pre-pregnancy normal blood pressure. I would be looking to see if you had recently been on the pill and see if we could straighten any hormone issues out before trying to conceive... I am not a midwife yet but those would be my considerations. I think that is a good idea, but yeah, an OBs office might be a little confused as to why you would want to do anything like that. I would actually reccomend doing an appointment like that with a naturopathic midwife or an independant midwife personally, they might have more of value to offer. What are your goals surrounding this appointment.

Jessica, congratulations on your sexual success! I am so happy for you. As was mentioned before, enjoy it. sex can be so wonderful once you get the hang of it. Be patient with yourself regarding conception and the sexual progress you make in general. Dont put pressure on yourself or him to conceive, first get accustomed to the act, and start to enjoy it, and it should come naturally from there. Be well, darling.

Guava girl. I have had to quit full time nanny jobs for similar reasons... except it was the parents stressing me out rather than the kids! I always find the grown ups way harder to handle! I hope they take it well and that you have success in getting a handle on your anxiety. I have made a lot of progress i that area over the last few years. If you want to talk pm me.

So, what are everyone's holiday plans?

I have a big family christmas/recital happening here where I have to play the piano for my whole family and their suburban neighbours on the 21st.. and I only have been playing for like two months.
Then I head to my aunt and uncles about an hour and a half south to hang out for a week, and relax. We are having a 7 course dinner on christmas night with about ten of their friends. I am really looking forward to that!
Then once I get back from there I will be moving into my new amazing house!! And then on January 6 I find out whether I got into school (holy crap! Seriously, I am terrified to find out). No new years plans though.
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Old 12-16-2008, 11:45 PM
 
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Had to use the divacup today. Not pregnant. :

Holidays... leaving on Saturday for the in-laws, 9.5 hour drive, blah. Being there is pretty boring, but I'll get a lot of knitting done. Coming back the 30th, working 31st and 1st. Visiting my parents on the 2nd (only 20 mins away). Then back to the regular schedule.

The beginning of 2009 also marks time to re-apply to the school board though. Eek.

Mommy to  N baby.gif, born 2/20/12.

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Old 12-19-2008, 12:28 AM
 
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I'm a bit behind on the thread but congrats Jessica, that's wonderful.::


GuavaGirl - I think you did the right thing. We spend so much of our time working and if that work is causing you stress and it's only part of what you do for work, it's good to stick to those jobs that don't cause you so much anxiety and stress, especially if you're TTC.

Kyamo - I'm sorry to hear you're not pregnant yet ( but yay divacup!) I'm sure it will happen when it's meant to happen

I got to buy a baby sling for someone today for a present. It was fun looking at all kinds of baby stuff. I nearly got them a Dr. Sears book I found but I don't know, if felt too... pushy. Like this is what I want for when I have a baby so you should want this too. I don't know, I probably read too much into things.

Anyway, the sling I bought comes in three sizes based on the person who's wearing it's size. I'm pretty small but the people I'm buying for are both much taller and bigger than me and the lady at the store looked at me like I was crazy till I explained it wasn't for me. I hope it fits. They still have about 6 months left before the baby comes but I'm so excited It's hard having so many people around me with babies sometimes but I love oogling them

This is going to be Df's first Christmas with my family hopefully, as long as the weather doesn't turn terrible. We're driving about 6 hours on Christmas Eve to go stay at my Aunt's house and hang out with my mom's side of the family for three days. May stop in on my Dad's side on the way home. Not sure if Df's ready for that though. That side of the family's much more religious and straight laced. We'll see. Happy Holidays everyone!
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Old 12-19-2008, 12:49 AM
 
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I got to buy a baby sling for someone today for a present. It was fun looking at all kinds of baby stuff. I nearly got them a Dr. Sears book I found but I don't know, if felt too... pushy. Like this is what I want for when I have a baby so you should want this too. I don't know, I probably read too much into things.
I know what you mean. I get kind of nervous too when I'm picking out baby gifts. I often want to get things that I would want for myself and so I have to edit my gift choices. I still get them something in line with my thinking but I don't go overboard.
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Old 12-19-2008, 02:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey all!
Holiday plans-wise Chris and I will have a Christmas eve dinner at my mom's (maybe go see his parents during the day, if he wants) then on Christmas day we drive up to NY and visit my dad and little sister for a few days. Then I have to come back to do inventory at the store. :
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Old 12-19-2008, 06:21 PM
 
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for the holidays...
dh and i are leaving this weekend to drive home (FL) for the holidays. we are going to be there for 2 weeks, so that should be nice. i always love going home and seeing my fam and friends, esp since we go home only 1x/yr.

i hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!! i hope 2009 is filled with happiness and love for everyone.
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Old 12-19-2008, 07:31 PM
 
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.


Not momma yet, but momma to a ton of furry, scaly, slimy and feathery critters. whale.gifribbongreen.gif
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Old 12-22-2008, 12:56 PM
 
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Kyamo - I'm sorry to hear you're not pregnant yet ( but yay divacup!) I'm sure it will happen when it's meant to happen
I know... its not the best time anyways (hence the birth control... lol). Can't help being a bit sad though.

Mommy to  N baby.gif, born 2/20/12.

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Old 12-22-2008, 01:58 PM
 
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I just wanted to peek into your thread and let any of the older NotMomsYet know that some of us were later when we had our children.
I didn't meet my husband until I was 38 and I did not get married until I was 41 and then I had DS when I was 43!!!! I know that must seem like an eternity but you know it was worth it. and I am convinced the baby/child comes at the exact right time.

I send you guys big hugs and I hope 2009 is the year where a bunch of you become mommies!

Happy Holidays!

Check out New Moon on my Astrology Site

http://tracyastrosalon.blogspot.com/

 

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Old 12-22-2008, 02:41 PM
 
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So here's a little update on our TTC plans.

We were planning on trying this cycle. I went to the dentist (hadn't been in a while) and I have a cavity, and my gums are not in the best shape. So now we're thinking about waiting another month until all of that gets taken care of. I'm a little bummed. I know it sounds pathetic, but when you're that close, and then it's like "oh nevermind", it's a slight let down. Esp. since we have this little vacation planned, which happens to be right around when I ovulate. We thought it would be a great TTC kick off vacation too! (we keep going back and forth on what we should do, trying to determine what is safe and what isn't)

...and to top it all off, yesterday as I left a house I was babysitting at, the little baby did not want me to go. He didn't want to let go of me and was all upset when I was leaving. This hasn't happen before with him. Maybe it was because we did a lot of snuggling that day. Anyway, I was fine, but then as I was driving down the road I got really sad all of a sudden, got home, and just started crying. I was missing this kid already! My poor DH was like....."uh I'm sorry you're so sad, but he's not even your baby honey.???" He's constantly baffled by the power of maternal instincts.


Oh, and Tracy, thanks for the reality check.

-Alisha
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Old 12-26-2008, 10:12 PM
 
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For those who celebrate, how was your Christmas?
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Old 12-28-2008, 06:42 PM
 
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Hey all!

I'd like to join you ladies.

I'm Lindsay; I live with my dp/fiance Dave, two kitties and a huge GSD in beautiful Florissant, MO.

I found MDC through a link to a thread and just started reading... and here I am!

We're "not not TTC" and are looking at possibly having to deal with some fertility issues when we really start TTC for real. :\

babyf.gif

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Old 12-28-2008, 07:44 PM
 
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Welcome, talk de jour!

I've been hiding out for a little while, working on a "sock" monkey that I thought was just too cool. Unfortunately, the little girl that I gave it to didn't like it. Those were her exact words on first sight -- "I don't like it." Well, that was 50-some-odd hours down the drain. When I asked why, she told me she wanted a princess barbie instead...

In other news, DP's and my fifth dating anniversary was on the 15th! I can't believe it's been FIVE YEARS already!

I gotta go. Happy Holidays!

Nearly crunchy mama to one DS born at home 12/09 and married to my best friend one week later signcirc1.gif

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Old 12-29-2008, 02:46 AM
 
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We had a lovely, if bittersweet Christmas. Both Kyle and I lost a grandparent this year (his in December just before his birthday) and I had a chemical pregnancy that ended on the 22nd, but honestly it has just brought us all that much closer.

We're really struggling with when to try...

Andee & welcome Talk du jour
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Old 12-29-2008, 10:05 AM
 
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Andee, that monkey is so cool! I'm sure once the barbie-lover turns about 14, that sock monkey will be the coolest thing she owns.

Jaclyn, sorry for your losses! The holidays can be a hard enough time without extra sadness!

We did absolutely nothing for the holidays. DP has/had the flu and a terrible cough and spend 5 days asleep on the couch. I knitted and read books. All in all, not so bad. I'm fairly bummed to be back at work after all that relaxing, though!

Bicycle-ridin', craftin', bloggin' feminist future mama to my starbabies dum spiro spero
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Old 12-29-2008, 11:48 AM
 
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.


Not momma yet, but momma to a ton of furry, scaly, slimy and feathery critters. whale.gifribbongreen.gif
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Old 12-29-2008, 01:09 PM
 
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We had a lovely, if bittersweet Christmas. Both Kyle and I lost a grandparent this year (his in December just before his birthday) and I had a chemical pregnancy that ended on the 22nd, but honestly it has just brought us all that much closer.

We're really struggling with when to try...

Andee & welcome Talk du jour
I'm sorry for your losses.

babyf.gif

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Old 12-29-2008, 04:50 PM
 
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Checking in... Aside from our Christmas Eve flight turning into a Christmas morning flight, arriving at my parents' house at 4am, it was a really good Christmas--the first one my parents and I have actually spent at home in 5 years (we've been going to Florida in recent years), and the first Christmas for me and dh as a married couple! :

As far as TTC goes, dh and I have decided to say "screw it" on worrying about timing--if I get pregnant this month, I may have to end up missing my cousin's wedding in the fall, but, well, it could also take a few more months, so why bother worrying about the what-ifs on when it happens?

Anyhow, the really good news is that our finances seem to be very much under control (a large part of why we're not worried about timing), and with any luck, dh's work hours will be more normal within a month when the project he's working on goes online.

Oh, and the sock monkey is so cute! (I know my mom would've been mortified if I'd said anything negative to someone about a gift--I was on strict orders to be polite even if someone gave me something that was obviously a cheap drug store toy, and my mom did enough sewing that I could always tell if someone had put real effort into something...)

Emily
Married 7/26/2008 -:- Remembering Joseph *10/9/2009* and two other losses since 9/08 -:- Expectingenergy.gif mid-September.

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Old 12-30-2008, 10:41 PM
 
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talk de jour Nice to meet you.

jaclyn7 - I'm sorry you've been struggling with so much loss but glad that it's brought you closer to your Dp. I don't know what it is about December. I lost three of my grandparents in Decembers of different years. I hadn't even heard of chemical pregnancy until earlier this year when one of my friends had one. Luckily she's managed to get pregnant for real now and is due in July : I hope that things become clearer for you about when you want to try.

zejh - Seems like a really good attitude to take, just have fun and see what happens Enjoy!

oiseau - I'm sorry your Christmas started off rocky but it's great that it turned around.

Our Christmas was pretty great. We started out not so good, weather kept us home Christmas Eve and I was afraid we wouldn't get to go to stay with my family like we'd planned but the weather was better on Christmas day so we left at 6am to drive for 6 hours! It was crazy but really really fun. I love my family and Df seemed to really enjoy meeting my extended family. We played some crazy games, ates lots of awesome food and came back on Saturday. It's nice to be home. I'm trying to get lots of cleaning and organizing done this week before school starts up again.

Hope everyone's enjoying the last few days of 2008:::
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Old 01-03-2009, 01:40 PM
 
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HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! It's getting quiet in here.

jaclyn7, s
oiseau, are you feeling any better? How'd your project go?
zejh, that's awesome that you have all your financial ducks in a row. Any news on ttc? I just can't hardly wait until we get to that point!

Thank you everyone for the nice comments on the monkey. I'm very proud of him. Things are going pretty blah over here. DP and I have been sick for almost three weeks with what we think is bronchitis. I was a little worried that we'd have to go get antibiotics (we are currently without insurance), but apparently they don't work on bronchitis anyway because it's viral. So I'm just waiting to feel better...

I don't generally do these, but does anyone have any new year's resolutions?

Nearly crunchy mama to one DS born at home 12/09 and married to my best friend one week later signcirc1.gif

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Old 01-03-2009, 09:58 PM
 
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Thank you all for your kind wishes. It's snowing (again) here in Vancouver and I'm putting away our Christmas/solstice decorations - another year has begun.

I think for 2009, my big resolution is to let go of things more easily and go with the flow. I'm so uptight in many ways and the fear of everything not being just perfect is tiring. I'm not really sure what is holding us back from actively trying besides materialistic expectations and my fear of failure. We've sorta tried twice with the two losses, but we've hidden behind the "sorta" as somehow that dimishes our pain or our desire to start a family and I know we have both outgrown that safety net...
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Old 01-03-2009, 11:47 PM
 
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My New Year's Resolution is to try and stay true to the following three words: Discerning, Hopeful, and Persevering. I'm trying to be discerning about the path that I'm supposed to take this next year, trying to be hopeful about new opportunities, and try to persevere through any crap that might come my way.

I adapted this idea of a three-word resolution from the Motherlode blog/column on NYTIMES. The author suggested creating a one-word New Year's Resolution. Well...I couldn't stick to one, so I came up with a three-word New Year's Resolution.
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Old 01-04-2009, 12:05 AM
 
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My school is deciding on what applicants to accept in exactly three days. At this time on the sixth a bunch of women will be deciding my future. I am feeling very sick thinking about it, and hope that you will all send good vibes on the sixth in support of me getting into school. So much is dependant on this, I am getting more freaked out by the day!!!

My new years resolution is to bring in some money this year, and be better at saving.
I had a wonderful new years, very very good new years kiss....
All moved into my new house and things seem to be good, but I cant get this whole Birthingway decision out of my head.
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