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#1 of 598 Old 05-28-2003, 01:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Any other Native American Mamas out there? Post here!
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#2 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 12:07 AM
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Hello Little Bear's Mama! I am Lakota and Anishinaabe. No longer on the rez. Going to college to become a doctor. Somedays I feel so out of place...some days I am on top of the world and feel so proud of myself. For not only have I survived but am trying to thrive. I want my children to be safe. Did you ever realize that our ppl have only suffered oppression for less than 400 yrs? Think of all the other ppl's who have endured thousands of years! So little time, I feel like I could make this a better world for my children, kwim? I want to make it possible for our people to be able to practice our healing ceremonies without fear of being arrested and thrown in jail.

Well, I'll check in again soon! Time for baby...
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#3 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 11:24 AM
 
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I am Leni Lenape (Delaware) from my father's side and Lakota from my mother's



400 years of oppression from who? We did oppress each other a bit.

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#4 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 12:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi! How exciting to meet you!
Mamaintheboonies,it is wonderful to hear you are going to college to be a doctor! I can imagine why you sometimes feel out of place,but it is great that you are strong and you preservere. Your family must be so proud!
Hiya,abbimommy!

As for myself,I am Creek and my dh is Southern Cheyenne/Winnebago. He is originally from OK and we usually travel there for ceremonies in the summer. I'm a SAHM. Our ds is 4(he'll be be 5 soon ). I am hoping to homeschool his kindergarten.

The thing I find the hardest,is exposing to my ds to his culture where there is a cultural void. I mean,he is exposed to pow wow culture(my dh sings),but I wonder about him understanding where he comes from when we are so far from everyone. Do either of you feel that way?

And thanks for replying to this thread. This is gonna be fun!
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#5 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 01:14 PM
 
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I'm not a mama, yet, but I will be someday. My dad was Choctaw and Cherokee. I am saddened sometimes to know that my kids won't be indian. So Little Bear's Mama, I don't have an answer for you. If you don't mind, I'll just go back to lurking here?

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#6 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 01:30 PM
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abimommy - I was refering to ppl always talking about how the 'White Man' has been oppressing our ppl for 500 yrs. Columbus may have landed on Plymouth Rock 500 yrs ago, but that doesn't mean that settlers were all over America. It has really only been the last 300 yrs, if that.

Little Bear's Mama - I still speak both my languages and speak them to my children. I am very tradional, ie- pipe carrier, I am the person who names the children, healing ceremonies, etc. I also sing. I do know what you mean, tho, about being away from it all. I had to hide all my ceremonial stuff because of ppl's b.s. Long story short, I was being racially harrassed and was and still am in fear of them calling the police. It is sad that my children see this. I want to be able for us to live in peace and without fear.
My 7 yr old dd struggles with knowing who she is, but that is because of all the stereotyping out there. The kids at school make fun of her skin color and her hair. The teacher told her that 'You get to go to school for free because you are an indian.' My dd was really confused by that statement. The teacher also told the other kids that the reason my dd always has nice clothes and new toys is because all indians get casino money. Arghhhhh!!!

So, lots of discussions and talk and dealing with hurt feelings. I really wish I had never sent her to school, kwim? I won't even go into the crap around Thanksgiving. needless to say my dd was volunteered to be the indian.

Okay, no more ranting lol! Our children will do just fine. If we talk to them and tell them the stories, they will know who they are. I have always taught my children they are human beings worthy of being loved before teaching them anything else, kwim? I just figure that is what we all are first and foremost.
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#7 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 02:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I understand what you mean my dh is a ceremonial person,too. He has that to show our ds and I am glad of it. My has an Uncle and cousins that leave in a nearby state and they come to visit regularly,which is helpful.
How wonderful to hear that you are passing your ways on to your children.
My dh is fluent in his language and neither am I. Quite sad,really. Luckily,my dh Uncle works with the Johnson O'Malley(sp?) folks for his community and are teaching the Cheyenne language to the kids in head start. So,I will be able to get the materials to begin teaching my ds his language(or one of them) at home.
It is SO sad to hear you had to hide your ceremonial objects.
I'm sorry you are being harrassed. Please stay safe.
May I ask where you're located? Are you far from home?(feel free to pm me).
I'm sorry your daughter is facing the stereotyping. I,too,have heard the "free school" comments along with the whole free healthcare,no taxes,B.S. If people only knew. It amazes me the kind of misinformation that is out there. This is one reason I plan to homeschool my ds kindergarten.
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#8 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 04:42 PM
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I'm about three hours drive from home, so not too bad.
I am so happy to hear you will be able to homeschool! I so wished I could! Being a full time student myself leaves no time for anything. I barely get supper made and then it's time for bed. At least my children see me reading all the time, so they are all into reading lol!
When I was younger I was fortunate that I got to go to school that was all ojibwe's and they taught class in ojibwe. I didn't have to speak english until third grade, when my mom moved to the cities. But, even then, it was mostly Native children. So, I have very little knowledge of what my dd is going through, kwim? I just try to be supportive of who she is and wants to be.
Does your son dance? My ds is a grassdancer, my dd is jingle dress but wants to start fancy shawl this year. We'll see how it goes lol! I found my shawl from when I was her age, but she doesn't have a dress yet. I'll have to make a visit to my aunty's lol! I never did learn how to sew!
I do beadwork, and can make moccasins and shawls, but the dresses and everything else...:
I DO have a sewing machine tho!!! just don't know how to use it...
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#9 of 598 Old 05-30-2003, 07:33 PM - Thread Starter
 
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LOL!!! I'm not a very good seamstress,either. I can sew better by hand than by machine! I like to make dance shawls,that is my thing. I'm not very good at beadwork or leatherwork. Glad to hear that you are!
My ds does not dance. He had a slammin' grass dance outfit,but he didn't like to wear it(mind you this was 2 years ago) he was really liked the bells,though. Last time I put it on him,he said "Mama I don't want to dance". I said "why not?" he said "I sing". So there you go! He enjoys singing with his daddy,and that is good enough for me! Glad to hear your children are dancing. I wish your dd lots of luck with fancy shawl.
I'm glad to hear you have instilled a love of reading in your children. I have tried to do so in my ds. Story time is one of his favorite things!



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#10 of 598 Old 06-02-2003, 09:13 PM
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Hi. My mom is Lakota and Hidatsa and my dad is Mandan. My husband is white and we live about an hour from my reservation. I'm excited to see this thread. I didn't expect to see Indian women on this site.

Umm, not sure what else to say. I'm due in September, but I would like to start school again in January. I would also like to be a doctor.

It's interesting that you mentioned dresses and dancing, because I'm going to start making one. I am not very good at sewing, but I got a sewing maching as a wedding present and lately I've felt like making things. I'm thinking I might be having a boy, so I also want to make a little ribbon shirt.

Speaking of kids in school: my little brother is in third grade. The boys in his class were giving each other nicknames and Justin ended up with 'Chief Joseph.'
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#11 of 598 Old 06-03-2003, 03:47 AM
 
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Wow, MamaInTheBoonies I would definately complain to that teacher's superior about her behavior. That is completely and totally inappropiate.

My dh is Blackfoot but they don't know much about it so dd is registered with the Lenape (Delaware) as I am.

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#12 of 598 Old 06-03-2003, 11:52 AM
 
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to you MamaintheBoonies

Just passing through and read about how horrible you and your DD have been treated. I agree with abimommy -- that teacher should be reported to her supervisor.

My father was Ramapough and Penobscot. His sister definitely identifies with being Ramapough, but I wasn't raised by that family and only see her occasionally. I don't really identify with being Indian. I love going to powwows, but am cautious because I don't want to seem like someone who just jumped on the bandwagon because they found some distant relative who is a 1/4 Indian, KWIM? I inquired about registering with the Ramapoughs, but I never got a response back, and I'm not even sure it's a possibility since they aren't a federally recognized tribe. So much for me to learn, but I'm too shy to ask more questions.
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#13 of 598 Old 06-03-2003, 12:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi,Apple! Great news about your baby. Congrats!
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#14 of 598 Old 06-03-2003, 07:25 PM
 
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Hey ladies! I'm SARAH I live in Mpls, MN. Anyway I personally have no Indian heritage of my own but my DF does. And we have chosen to follow the Indian ways. DD had a baby naming ceremony and everything. MIL is very into her Indian heritage and is a Medicine Woman. I am always wanting to learn more. We are expecting our 2nd DD very soon now too.
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#15 of 598 Old 06-04-2003, 07:18 AM
 
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Mom2AliKat, you can be registered with tribes even if they are not federally recognized.

Was your grandfather on the rolls for the tribe? I would also try asking his sister about it. Non-recognized tribes are often run by all volunteers and it really is a lot of work to get everything straightened out. Try contacting them again.

A lot of times things are lost when the older generation gets very old or passes away. I would really try and talk with ehr about it. I am sure she would be glad to see you had interest.

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#16 of 598 Old 06-04-2003, 07:44 AM
 
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Abimommy, thanks for the info. I don't keep in touch with my aunt nearly as much as I should, but I'll have to talk to her about it. I've never really brought it up to her because she has cancer, and tends to be very sick off and on. Plus, I had to question my reasonings why I wanted to be on the tribal rolls in the first place. I don't want to do it for selfish reasons, and when I was younger that was certainly part of my reasons for looking into it.
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#17 of 598 Old 06-04-2003, 09:40 PM
 
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Why do you have to have a reason?? It is your birthright.

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#18 of 598 Old 06-05-2003, 07:26 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by abimommy
Why do you have to have a reason?? It is your birthright.
I guess I felt like since I'm not full-blooded, and I only found about being Indian when I was 19 (now 27), I don't have the same right as someone who has been living their whole life knowing they were Indian. I really don't want to step on anyone's toes or be out of place, y'know?

If you all don't mind me asking, how does one get started in dancing? Is it ok to ask someone that already dances? I know they probably won't teach you *everything* (so you don't copy them step-for-step), but perhaps they would teach you some basics?
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#19 of 598 Old 06-05-2003, 08:08 AM
 
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I am sure you can find someone who knows at a pow wow, when you mentioned your tribe I hadn't heard of it and did a search on google and some things came up..maybe you can get an idea there..

Every tribe is different about that sort of thing really, some have tapes, some have classes and some people have to find someone to teach them...

I don't think it matters if you are not full blooded. A lot of tribes don't have any full blood members.

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#20 of 598 Old 06-06-2003, 01:19 AM
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Topic of my dd and her teacher - reporting it to her supervisor would do nothing, as her supervisor is even more ignorant. He believes all non-white children are savages and need to be taken from their parents and raised by non-savages so they learn how not to be savages. Thankfully, with the help of a lot, and I mean a LOT, of people, the charges against me were dismissed. THat man seriously wanted my children removed from my home purely based on the color of our skin.
My youngest dd was born by emergency c-section and I am a single mom with no family near by. So, september 24 until the 27 my dd was not in school because she was in the hospital with me, I have all the documentation and even the nurses notes saying that she was there. The principal waited until January 14 to file charges against me for educational negelct, because in MN it is a crime if your child misses or is even tardy more than 7 times!!!!

Okay, onto other stuff - if you want to learn how to dance at pow-wows, do as the children do and all other beginners...you watch and practice and learn. And, yes, ppl will laugh at your mistakes, but if you stick with it and actually learn, you will be very respected. I have been dancing for 20 odd years and I still don't know all the dances, and that is just for fancy shawl! But I did only put effort into the fun dances lol! Not that they can't all be fun, just that there are a lot of ceremonial ones that I never learned. Now that i am a mother, tho, I no longer dance. Someday, maybe lol!

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#21 of 598 Old 06-06-2003, 04:20 AM
 
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That is SHOCKING!!!! WHAT A LUNATIC!!! I would complain to the superintendant that these people are crazy.

If that doesn't work I would continue to find people to complain to until I got results.

My grandmother lobbied congress to get the tribal funds that had been placed in trust released to the tribe. One congressman just shrugged and said, "I don't want to, sue me."

She sued the US in a case that became landmark in Native American law. I still have the Supreme Courts with her name on it vs the United States.

That congressman later shook her hand and said "Wow, I didn't think you would really sue.." :

That is chilling people are so ignorant. There was a movie recently made about such things happening in Australia "Rabbit Poof Fence" it is very good.

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#22 of 598 Old 06-06-2003, 01:08 PM
 
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I'm just horrified. I cannot believe some people. And he is an administrator, a person respected in his community! Awful! I'm really mad that that is happening anywhere.
My co-workers do not believe that indians are really harassed by police here. They just don't think police are human, too, with prejudices and everything. Well, the one black guy believes me, but why not everyone else? On the grand scheme of life, I think having bad policemen pales in comparison to having it pervade even social government, like teachers and social workers.
I thought it was federal law that foster children had to be placed with indian families?? Our state operates that way and I know oklahoma does, too. When you take away an indian child, there is virtually no possibility that they will go to a white home. The tribal governments also get first "dibs" on the child's case and it reverts to the state only when the tribe says no. And even when the state has the child, he/she still goes to an indian home. Does this man not understand that? What an idiot!

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#23 of 598 Old 06-06-2003, 03:00 PM
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About that federal law- People still don't like to follow it, though. It's called the Indian Child Welfare Act and when an Indian child is up for a foster home or adoption, someone in the family or tribe gets first 'dibs', in order to keep them in the community.

However, when my mom tried to adopt my little brother (my older sister's son, so he's really my nephew, which he knows), she had the worst time. Even with a law like that, she met with so much resistance. She even had a lawyer helping her.
It just seems so archaic that people still try to take Indian kids away from their families.

I am also appalled that the school would treat you like that and I don't know what to say.
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#24 of 598 Old 06-06-2003, 04:01 PM
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well, that's the other issue...ickwe only supports those children that are enrolled. The government has implemented a policy of paper genocide. ie - blood quantum is based on land, not actual blood, that is why when two full bloods have children, their oldest is considered 3/4, the next child is half, and so on and so forth. So, even tho I come from a lineage of only natives, my blood quantum is 1/8 less than 3/8 on my mom's side and 1/64 less than 25/64 on my fathers side. So, I am unable to be enrolled in either of my tribes. My children are also unable to be enrolled. There are thousands of indian children who are unable to be enrolled and therefore no longer exist as indian in the eyes of the governement. Both my dd's are considered less than 1/8. Anyone looking at them can see they are full blooded.

So, if my children were taken from me, they WOULD be placed in a non-native home and probably adopted. sucks...always have to be on my toes. CPS has been called on me for breastfeeding my newborn, for not vaccinating, for educational neglect...Arghhhhh! I have social workers and guardian ad lidems visiting unannounced all the time. I have been in court too many times to count, for just stupid shit. I have never drank, never used/abused drugs, don't spank, anyone and just about everyone who meets my girls are so amazed at how loving and caring they are....As most of you know, that's not easy!!! I see my friends and neighbors who yell and spank their kids and it just saddens me, but I know that it is easier to lose your patience and just lash out. It takes a strong mind/will to think clearly ALL the time and be aware of how your actions affect your children. I don't care if my children never have name brand clothes, or even brand new clothes, I just want them to feel loved and cared about, I want them to feel safe and be able to love others and care about others. I don't want my children to think it is okay to hurt others just because they are upset or angry. So many years I have been parenting and doing my best and all this petty stuff keeps happening. It just makes me sick, sometimes.

ok, well, i need to stop. I am on a friends computer. it's raining today, so I didn't want to walk in the rain with my babies, to go to the library.
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#25 of 598 Old 06-08-2003, 01:43 AM
 
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What!??!!?!?!?!???!?!?!!?!?!?!?

Um, screw that I would sue. That is TOTAL BULLCRAP!! TOTAL!!

When did this happen? It isn't like that with all tribes!

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#26 of 598 Old 06-09-2003, 02:03 PM
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This has all taken place this last year. the case against me for educational neglect was just dimissed June 2, seven days ago. nice.
Who would I sue? How does one sue? I have no money for attorneys or anything like that. On paper, we are not even indian, so we couldn't sue for racial discrimination.
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#27 of 598 Old 06-13-2003, 02:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just checking in. Hope everyone here is doing well.
Not much to report,really. Just enjoying the great weather! My dh's drum is hoping to compete at the 4rth of July pow wow in Cherokee,NC. My ds and I will be staying home On the up side, I will be able to participate in the online chats that coincide with the LLL International Conference.

Mama In The Boonies, I'm so sorry to hear about all the struggles you have been through. I hope that everything is on the mend for you! Stay strong.
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#28 of 598 Old 06-14-2003, 02:26 AM
 
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I wouldn't sue for discrimination but I would look into breech of contract. See what kind of agreements the gov had with your tribe. It must be something or they wouldn't have done this.

And talk to the elders about getting on the roles. This sounds like a heck of a fight but it would certainly be interesting.

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#29 of 598 Old 06-20-2003, 07:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just checking in. Hope all is well with all of you.
Do any of you post at www.powwows.com?
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#30 of 598 Old 07-02-2003, 02:33 PM
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CarrieBeary77 - as far as I know, lineage is usually passed down from the females side. In a lot of tribes it doesn't matter if your great-great-great grandfather was indian or not, even if it's your father. Offspring are usually considered indian if their mother was indian. It is different for some tribes, tho. Also, if you were never involved with your tribe, they may not recognize you as a part of them. A lot of enrollment issues are dealt with by a committee and if the ppl on the committee don't know you, they won't let you get enrolled. It's all politics, anyways. It has nothing to do with ancestry. If you are truly interested in connecting with your tribe, I would find out if they have a newsletter or newspaper and start attending the events they offer. One thing to remember is that these are tribal ppl, not an organization or religious group. If you have never been involved with tribal ppl, there are some huge differences in the way of thinking and living. For example - I can go anywhere on this earth and be welcomed into any tribe, it is a way of life, we recognize one another. It is hard living in two worlds, but it is possible.

It takes time, but if you are willing to put in the time and effort, you will be accepted.

Is anyone else on the pow-wow trail?
i am thinking about dancing again! I am still trying to decide if I should continue in fancy shawl or take the time to learn jingle...I feel like an old woman, sometimes, tho, lol! Maybe I should do jingle so I don't break any bones lol! Does anyone know any mothers who dance fancy?
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