NMY Graduates Love Thread, Part 4 - Page 13 - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-13-2008, 07:55 PM
 
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Hi folks...just sticking my head in for a second. It's very quiet around these parts at the moment.

I've been quiet mostly 'cos I'm insanely busy at the moment. Work is kicking my butt...but only 4 more weeks after this one! Yay. I had my last big project finish up on the weekend which is great. Now I just have to coordinate a new website, finish up a [25 pages and counting] discussion paper and work on all my handover/induction manuals for my replacement. Totally doable, right!!??

Everything else is great. Squeak is perfect. The reflux is only bad some days and I'm even managing to sleep every few nights. Any spare time I've had lately seems to have been spent making mad dashes to ikea or target and putting together flat pack furniture! We've just finished the most awesome independent birth education classes too. I'm completely inspired and empowered and MUCH less naive than I was before we did the classes.

Hope everyone is doing well. And I hope our newest grad is thriving. (zoebird, how are you and hawk?)

One gorgeous solstice babe 12/08, two smitten mothers - mothering consciously with conscience and compassion. Birth & Postnatal Doula. Student Midwife. Expecting #2 November '12.

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Old 10-13-2008, 10:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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baby in lap, but mmm good to hear from you! glad you're doing well & I'm so excited for you to meet Squeak!

Expecting #2 in May 2013!

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Old 10-14-2008, 12:06 PM
 
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dying of curiosity over squeak's name, but totally understand if you are not ready to share the list.

just got back from whirlwind tour of washington dc. it was totally nuts, made us hate on lack of pub transit. also had rough time with friend with SN child with bad (potentially fatal) dx who basically manipulated us into spending more time with her than planned and shortchanging other friends. sigh. saw a lot of bad "discipline" in action and dh is more than ever into emotion coaching -- i.e., empowering kids to negotiate btwn themselves rather than having them tattle to you and then you imposing the law. he concluded the visit by saying he needs to read some of my parenting books. i suspect all my friends think i am nuts to have such a "free range toddler." they were blown away by her antics like piling toy boxes to make ladder to climb onto dining room table (that i intervened in). but in general other kids seem so PASSIVE compared to dd, who seems like a different species. i felt a mix of pride (re dd) and sadness (re other kids) when a friend's oldest said re dd, "she is so much more fun than my brother and sister, and acts older." she actually has more words than my friend's 2 yo, the little sister in question, whose words are pretty much focused on dora, high heels, and disney princesses.
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Old 10-14-2008, 12:29 PM
 
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i suspect all my friends think i am nuts to have such a "free range toddler." they were blown away by her antics like piling toy boxes to make ladder to climb onto dining room table (that i intervened in). but in general other kids seem so PASSIVE compared to dd, who seems like a different species. i felt a mix of pride (re dd) and sadness (re other kids) when a friend's oldest said re dd, "she is so much more fun than my brother and sister, and acts older." she actually has more words than my friend's 2 yo, the little sister in question, whose words are pretty much focused on dora, high heels, and disney princesses.
I see this with Maev too a lot. Although, recently (last couple of weeks), she has become quieter and more shy in large group situations. I think she's just so interested in watching what the other kids are doing lately.

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Old 10-14-2008, 02:41 PM
 
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MMM, good to hear from you and that things are going well! I'm so excited about Squeak's impending arrival!

Rhea's doing well--she's so strong and strong-willed (not surprised with the huge Leo influence in her chart!). Last couple of nights she's been babbling away at bedtime--she babbles quite a bit, but this is much more concentrated. I had her loosely swaddled on my belly, and she looked like the Buddha giving pronouncements on us So cute.

We had her at the wedding, and what a champ. When she wasn't sleeping, she was very social, and danced a bit to the music (she dances by pumping her legs, especially her right one). Everyone was impressed by how alert she was.

Yesterday the ILs were by for the day, along with a friend of the family--man, they're nuts. I was concerned how her bf'ing on demand was going to fly, not that I would change for their sakes, but I was hoping that maybe the friend would have more of a clue than the ILs. Hah! I was brushing my teeth when Rhea started making hungry signals to DH, and then the buzzer rang to let them in! So we get over there, made quick introduction to the baby and said that she was hungry and needed to eat! The friend says to her, "Hungry? Do you want a bottle?"" So I reply, "No, we eat from the booby!" in the same kind of babyvoice. Later the friend asked if I fed her on demand and if it was a pain in the neck! : WTF kind of question is that? It was great later though when we walking in some public gardens later that day, and we managed to bf in the sling without having to sit down!

Come ponder with me about food!
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Old 10-14-2008, 05:40 PM
 
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It was great later though when we walking in some public gardens later that day, and we managed to bf in the sling without having to sit down!
Oooh Witchy, I'm impressed! You're already a pro!

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Old 10-14-2008, 07:42 PM
 
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Oooh Witchy, I'm impressed! You're already a pro!
Yeah, it worked out pretty well. I had managed to do the same a few days before walking through Macy's, and I said to my MIL as such, who was pretty much speechless. Thanksgiving is going to be sooooo special at their house. Oy.

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Old 10-15-2008, 12:17 AM
 
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dying of curiosity over squeak's name, but totally understand if you are not ready to share the list.
You're gonna have to hold on a bit longer sorry - we're not sharing. Nor do we actually have a name. But we have a shortlist. It seems we're going to have to meet this babe before he is named.

Our birth teacher had a 5 week old whose sisters had nicknamed 'baby rainbow' because she was still nameless. I fear the same fate for our boy.

One gorgeous solstice babe 12/08, two smitten mothers - mothering consciously with conscience and compassion. Birth & Postnatal Doula. Student Midwife. Expecting #2 November '12.

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Old 10-15-2008, 12:53 AM
 
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pak
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Old 10-15-2008, 02:43 AM
 
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first frost here on Saturday. :

mmm glad to hear from you. everyone!

my girl does this now, and it's adorable :

Busy mama of
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Old 10-15-2008, 11:14 AM
 
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You're gonna have to hold on a bit longer sorry - we're not sharing. Nor do we actually have a name. But we have a shortlist. It seems we're going to have to meet this babe before he is named.

Our birth teacher had a 5 week old whose sisters had nicknamed 'baby rainbow' because she was still nameless. I fear the same fate for our boy.
Popping in to say Hi. MMM, you were in my dream the other night! You and your partner were at the birth center where Fenton was born, I can't remember why. It was so nice to see your face, and I can't believe I recognized who you were .
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Old 10-16-2008, 12:56 AM
 
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Maela, glad the new betime routine is working! I also just realized recently that turning the lights down really helps.

Yay! I know, I hated - hated - beets before I tried them fresh and roasted. Now I really like them. They are also good grilled (boiled first) and with goat cheese, walnuts and arugula.

DD is now fascinated with watching me type. She also tries to use the trackpad on the laptop.
Ditto on all three accounts!!

Kai has been terrible about going to sleep lately. We've been having to drive
him around just about every other night. Turning the lights down does seem to be helping though (a few weeks ago driving was the only way to get him to sleep).

Still no luck wrapping Kai. He'd rather walk...unless Mike is there to wear him.

And a happy hello to MMM and Shanna!! You are missed but I understand about life being crazy and not getting to post much.

Traveling mama to DS (2) my nature boy :
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Old 10-16-2008, 02:37 AM
 
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Nice to hear from you MMM, Shanna, and Arelyn!



I am really in need of some like-minded mama friends IRL. I feel like there's no one that completely understands me (Dh comes very close, but he's not a woman ). I guess I can't expect anyone to completely understand me, but it's just so lonely sometimes being "the weird one" but not "weird" enough to fit into most alternative groups. I seem to have a lot of contradicting qualities/ likes and dislikes that makes it really hard for me to fit into any one social "group." This probably doesn't even make sense. Just wanted to vent.

LLL meeting tomorrow! Yay, some socialization! Need to try to make some friends....

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Old 10-16-2008, 05:48 PM
 
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maela, i am right there with you on the irl mommy friends conundrum. i tried lll but i felt excluded because i don't ec and didn't hb. i am way too interactive with dd for most mamas the playgrounds, who sit on the sidelines and then swoop in with orders to share. another complicating factor is dd's maturity level and/or temperment -- means lots of mamas of similarly aged kids are competitive. i'll be your friend. our babes sound like twins so much of the time.
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Old 10-16-2008, 06:00 PM
 
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maela, i am right there with you on the irl mommy friends conundrum. i tried lll but i felt excluded because i don't ec and didn't hb. i am way too interactive with dd for most mamas the playgrounds, who sit on the sidelines and then swoop in with orders to share. another complicating factor is dd's maturity level and/or temperment -- means lots of mamas of similarly aged kids are competitive. i'll be your friend. our babes sound like twins so much of the time.
Great! You want to move on over here to the central valley in CA?
I enjoyed my LLL meeting today. BTW, I am the only one in my LLL meeting that ECs (well, I'm more of a part-time ECer) and one of only two or three that HBed, but everyone there is very accepting and even interested, so it doesn't bother me. I think that I will be the odd one out when I am the only one not CLWing. I plan on slowly (like over the course of a year) encouraging weaning once Dd turns two. I have no problem with CLWing, but I sometimes get the feeling that it's not accepted to MLW in my LLL group, so I don't know if they'll be fine with me, yk? Time will tell....

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Old 10-18-2008, 06:50 PM
 
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Boy, did I kill the thread or what? 48 hours since the last post. Is that a record on this thread?



Has anyone here ever ordered toys from Magic Cabin? I just got their catalog in the mail today, and their stuff is so cool! And it doesn't seem to be overpriced.

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Old 10-18-2008, 10:34 PM
 
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you didn't kill the thread. my fantasy would be if dd would magically stop nursing on her 2nd bday.
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Old 10-18-2008, 11:42 PM
 
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Boy, did I kill the thread or what? 48 hours since the last post. Is that a record on this thread?



Has anyone here ever ordered toys from Magic Cabin? I just got their catalog in the mail today, and their stuff is so cool! And it doesn't seem to be overpriced.
Has it been that long already? Time gets away from me. I've been meaning to reply to your post....

I haven't ordered from Magic Cabin, but I also have their catalog and really like it.

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Great! You want to move on over here to the central valley in CA?
I enjoyed my LLL meeting today. BTW, I am the only one in my LLL meeting that ECs (well, I'm more of a part-time ECer) and one of only two or three that HBed, but everyone there is very accepting and even interested, so it doesn't bother me. I think that I will be the odd one out when I am the only one not CLWing. I plan on slowly (like over the course of a year) encouraging weaning once Dd turns two. I have no problem with CLWing, but I sometimes get the feeling that it's not accepted to MLW in my LLL group, so I don't know if they'll be fine with me, yk? Time will tell....
It's interesting, I guess it's kind of a benefit of living in such a mainstream area - it doesn't take much to qualify as crunchy. I've only met one woman so far who ECs, and she's just getting started with it part-time. I've also found a lot of like-minded moms in Holistic Moms Network. Everyone is basically at their own level of crunchiness. There is actually a new member mama from CA who was concerned whether the moms were judgemental with regard to how holistic the member were. I guess someone had warned them that that might be the case, since holistic lifestyles are so much more rare here than CA.

Anyway, I always had trouble fitting into one group or another too.

Also, I never thought about the distinction between CLW and MLW that way. I mean, I guess I considered nursing until at least 2 to pretty much be the same as CLW. I know it's not, really, but I think there's a big difference between that and weaning at a much younger age. I guess my LLL meeting is very casual too - it's usually just the leaders and me and maybe one or two other mamas. I went to the daytime meeting in another neighborhood once, and it was mostly brand new mamas - with babes under six weeks. I guess a lot of people just go at the start and don't keep going. But I like having the support and conversation.

MMM! I was wondering how you were doing. It's good to hear from you.

Mama to J (Apr 01 '08) and N (Feb 13 '10)
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Old 10-19-2008, 05:52 PM
 
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We've gotten a few things from Magic Cabin, as Quinn gets older we'll surely get more. We have been very happy with them and their products (we've bought mostly HABA stuff).

I am aiming to be done weaning around his 2nd birthday. I always said I'd got to 3, but I am really feeling ready, and he's mostly nursing at night so night weaning would just about be weaning, which is my current plan. Not sure how I'll do it, though!

Right now I am offering raw milk during the day unless he is nursing down for his nap. Like I said, he mostly nurses at night, so I only have to do this once or twice, and he doesn't mind one bit. Its the night nursing that's going to be a tough break. I'll think about that after Christmas I guess.

My LLL is anything from hospital (with the whole list of interventions) birthers whose babies sleep in a nursery, wear pampers, and are fully weaned by 1, to homebirthing ec-ers that nurse to 5. We have a local natural parenting group that works for my exclusively crunchy AP fix.
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Old 10-19-2008, 08:26 PM
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nak

ok, forgot to ask doc abt non-cocktail vax--sorry! but, h is 25 and some inches amd 9 lbs! very lanky, but healthy!

and no more nipple shields! he just did it last week when t he shield fell off as he was going for it. gaven't looked back!

baby blessing was good--more when not nak--but when is that these days!

hiked hawk mt with hawk---saw only one sharp shinned! but mt was busy and loud so no doubt hawks stayed away!
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Old 10-20-2008, 12:20 AM
 
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I am aiming to be done weaning around his 2nd birthday. I always said I'd got to 3, but I am really feeling ready, and he's mostly nursing at night so night weaning would just about be weaning, which is my current plan. Not sure how I'll do it, though!
consider huggins' nursing mother's guide to weaning.
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Old 10-20-2008, 02:18 AM
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first, the baby blessing was--overall--really lovely. about 25 people and for the most part beautiful blessings. i was so glad to have the people there whom we did, and i'm sure ryan will write a blog about it soon and you can all see the pictures and what not. give him a week, as he's coming back from the film festival that was this weekend.

second, my ils spent most of the time shaming and freaking out. it was embarassing to have that in front of all of our friends on a day when we were offering blessings to that lovely baby. good lord, you'd think they could be kosher for 2 hrs, but apparently not.

ryan's dad did a blessing that was more about shaming ryan "remember that you wouldn't be where you are without your parents, always seek their council. . .blah blah blah" i tuned it out after that because that is NOT what i want for H and it was obvious that FIL wanted that from ryan and i.

and, others confirmed that such was the case. they're disasters. i look forward to moving far from them, but it would stink to move away form my parents who are cool.

except that my mother--currently overweight as is my sister--like to put it onto me as if i'm the cause of the weight gain and of course, i also "need to loose a lot of weight" and my "tummy is a real problem area." even though i'm just 10 lbs from my pre-preggo weight, and i think that's mostly boob at this point. LOL

no, seriously, 7 wks post partum and needing to loose so little is good. i feel like i can be bikini ready by christmas, even though i'm not gonig to the islands then. LOL!

anyway, my mom has body issues.
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Old 10-20-2008, 11:11 AM
 
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zoebird, good for you for recognizing that they are her issues. my mom was not so blunt before dd's baptism (the first time she saw me post-partum) but when i asked which of 2 dresses looked better she justified her choice as "slenderizing." i was already very self-conscious about the belly bulge so it wasn't great.

speaking of the belly bulge, small and not so small children keep insisting i "must" be pregnant. : in one case, dh not so charitably noted (to me, not to the child) that i am way smaller than her mother. but in my case it is all in the waist/hips. i want to add exercise to my life but everything feels like it would be taking away from time with dd which i don't want to do because of the separation already in place for work. if she were like 3 i could justify it as setting a good example for her but really at this point i think all she knows is i am with her or i'm not.
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Old 10-20-2008, 12:02 PM
 
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zoe, ugh, i'm sorry about your ILs just wanting to shame you and act inappopriately. As for the weight issues thing, I am glad you recognize who it belongs to. Why do women have to criticize other women so soon after a baby anyway? I don't get it. I'm glad the baby blessing went well otherwise.

I'm right around my pre-preggo weight, though I'm not as strong as I usually am, so it's less muscle. None of my fav shirts fit right though as I have way more boob than I normally do. I've also found I need longer shirts in general, too. And DH and I have gotten a wicked sweet tooth lately, which has caused me to put on a few back that I had lost. Oh well.

Yesterday was the memorial service for my grandmother (finally after a whole fraking year!). The aunt I had really wanted to attend was sidelined because she had a stage 1 melanoma removed, and her doc told her not to fly. My other aunt who had largely planned it didn't drive me too crazy. Rhea was a champ, though she was totally overstimulated, so we had to retire upstairs where it could be quiet enough for her to eat.

holiztic, great to hear from you! It seems like I hear nightweaning is hardest anyway, but so far it sounds like things are going well-ish. good luck!

Come ponder with me about food!
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Old 10-20-2008, 01:31 PM
 
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Zoebird, glad to hear that nursing is going so well! And that the blessing went well despite your ILs. My mom can also be very blunt/perfectionist when it comes to weight.

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Old 10-20-2008, 02:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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PiePie, I hear you on the exercise. Is there something you could do with dd? Like a fast walk every day? Or a mommy & me class or DVD? Or even just a DVD that you invite dd to join in on?

zoebird, glad to hear the blessing went well and witchygrrl, also glad to hear the memorial service went well and that you had a quiet place to take Rhea to. (I never understood the importance of that until the last few weeks: If I even *blow my nose* while Abby's nursing, she stops and stares at me, then refuses to eat again. I stare daggers at DH whenever he walks into the bedroom talking while Abby's nursing.)

Pre-pg weight: I'm within 3-4 pounds of it, which is nice but obviously I'd like to be back where I was before! Things are definitely bulging in different places now because even 3-4 lbs off, I still can't fit into the bulk of my pre-pg pants. So I am biting the bullet and buying new clothes for work because it's been 8 months and nothing's really changed that much in the last 2 months anyway.

Nanny search: We interviewed a GREAT nanny this weekend. She knew what the amber teething necklace was...first person IRL ever to know that! She is very into natural stuff! Yay!

We have 2 more interviews scheduled with others on Mon & Tue, but I'm feeling pretty certain. DH wants to go ahead & interview them since we already set them up. So I guess my next step is to check refs...yay!!!!!!! I am *so* ready to get my work done during the day and not from 11 pm-2 am.

I have like 5 minutes til Abby wakes up from her am nap so gotta run & get some stuff done!

Expecting #2 in May 2013!

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Old 10-21-2008, 12:00 AM
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can i do a plug for a good workout? i bought that "10-minute trainer" series from beachbody.com. seriously, it's a good series.

about a week after H was born, i started doing the 10 minutes. it's about all i could handle away from him, and he from me. i would ask ryan to hold him and so the 10 minutes or so, and if H was quiet and happy, i might have done 2 or 3 of the workouts.

it was really good, really convenient, and a good workout (and i like a good workout). and at just 10 minutes (14 total if you count the warm up and cool down), i really couldn't justify NOT doing it. and, often R would be there holding H while i did it anyway.

between that and walking, i felt like my pelvic floor was getting back in action. and, there's a yoga segment that's not bad. i didn't do that, though. i did about 10 minutes of yoga a day with H (mostly floor work to start), and now i do about 30 without him (ryan watching him) plus walking 4 miles a day.

i now feel strong enough to start my weight training--i'll do 30 minutes once a week while ryan holds H. don't want to do any day care stuff. and, i have a friend who is going to babysit H for me at the yoga studio while i take a class--which is sweet.

oh, and i have a massage this week--finally and thank goodness! i need it!

anyway, i feel really good overall, but i relaly felt that that 10 minute trainer was a good option for people who are super busy. at first i thought it might be a gimmick, but once i tried it, it ws really good.

so, an option.
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Old 10-21-2008, 12:34 PM
 
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i have one of those 10 minute dvds. i intend to try it. TONIGHT!
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Old 10-21-2008, 04:44 PM
 
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Please feel free to tell me if I am being too stubborn/unreasonable:

My LLL leader brought over three bags of really cute clothes for Dd last month. There are 2 pretty Christmassy dresses that are in great condition. I really like them. And I love the fact that they were free and secondhand. The other day my mom told me about a dress that she saw at the store that she wants to buy Dd for Christmas (to wear on Christmas). I reminded her about the really cute dresses we already have. My mom said that she's the grandma and she should be able to buy Dd special things. I tried to get her to understand how we're trying to consume less and reuse things. My mom doesn't understand. She said that she's paying for it so why does it matter. I said because it's still being made by poorly-paid workers and bought for our daughter. we want to try to have a smaller "footprint". I know I hurt my moms feelings, but it bothers me to know that I have two perfectly good dresses right now. Why would we want to get a new one? Should I just let her buy the dress? Or should I tell her that next year if we don't have one already she can be incharge of getting one? Am I being too stubborn?
My mom thinks my "tree-hugger" ideas are silly. :

Wife to J. Mama to DD(3yo) & DS(1yo)
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Old 10-21-2008, 05:02 PM
 
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Why can't she buy her something else, if she really needs to BUY her things? I think you're handling it fine.

Come ponder with me about food!
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