Pregnant in Clarksville, TN. Birth options? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 51 Old 01-08-2011, 04:05 PM
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Oh, I forgot about The Looking Glass!!!  Also there is a diner on Riverside Drive (I forget the name of it, but it's before the big shopping center on the way to the river) that has some Pad Thai.  I never had it - supposed to be good.  There is also a Thai restaurant across from the river.  The food was pretty good; however, after seeing how dirty the bathrooms were, we didn't go back.  So use your discrection on that one!

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#32 of 51 Old 01-08-2011, 07:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just wanted to add that I love how my post about birth options has turned into restaurant and activity recs. LOL No, seriously. I do.  :)  

 

So...am I crazy to question if the Farm is a good decision? Am I just being scared? I am scared of being so far out in the country and feeling like I'm dying. (note: first baby was OP and I had LEEP scar tissue, so big issues there, pain wise. I feel like a wimp.)  :(  I do NOT want to be a Farm statistic of a mama who had to transfer just for an epi because of pain. 


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#33 of 51 Old 01-10-2011, 06:25 PM
 
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I don't think you're crazy to consider the Farm.  I'd ask them honestly about your questions.  I seriously doubt they transfer many people for pain.  They have an extremely low transfer rate, under 5% I think. 


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#34 of 51 Old 01-10-2011, 07:57 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't think you're crazy to consider the Farm.  I'd ask them honestly about your questions.  I seriously doubt they transfer many people for pain.  They have an extremely low transfer rate, under 5% I think. 



Thanks.  :)  I know, it seems like *the* perfect place in terms of great MWs, care, etc. My perspective is that I didn't pick the right MW for me the first time around. My innermost expectations of her (that I didn't even realize I had until I was in labor) did not match up at all to the kind of care she provided. (She was competent I think, but just didn't click with me, and that caused issues, aside from the actual medical stuff that happened.) So...it seems like the Farm takes the guesswork out of finding *one* home birth MW who is The One, because they have SUCH experience and such an amazing track record. I think even if that is a lot of boo, at the very least it makes me FEEL better, safer, and I think that will help me relax a little. 

 

As for pain--- I am scared. Like, really, really scared. I will probably post something separate on the birth forum later. But the whole "trust birth" thing makes me a little....I don't know. I am cynical, dry, sarcastic, witty, etc, to begin with, and I had a bad experience with my first birth. So I am not trusting right now, and don't really trust myself or my body. I know that's a bad place to be in, and I am hoping the Farm MWs may be able to help me reach a better level of understanding. 

 

 

 


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#35 of 51 Old 01-14-2011, 02:01 PM
 
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It sounds like you really need to deal with your fear.  The fear of the pain itself could create a self-fulfilling prophecy.  I used Hypnobabies with my last pregnancy, and it really helped me to tackle that fear head on.  Now I need to qualify my statement by honestly confessing I DID have an epidural with each and every one of my births.  But with this last one, I also know I made it farther than I ever would have without the hypnobabies, and I was about 32 hours into labor and 2 hours into pitocin before I asked for it.  I believe had I not had so many interventions and had such a long hospital labor (where you're disturbed every hour), I would have been able to do a natural birth with the hypnobabies.  I'd give my left arm not to have to be in a hospital for birth!


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#36 of 51 Old 01-24-2011, 12:56 PM
 
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I just wanted to say that I think the Farm sounds like a great idea. I live in Chattanooga and had my first at my midwife's house in Chattanooga and I had my second at home.  If there wasn't the network of CPM's in the area, I would have driven to the Farm. 

 

As for the fear aspect, I am a little biased since I teach Hypnobabies, but I would look into the program.  They have a home study course that you can do and it only takes 5 weeks, plus doing maintenance until the baby arrives.  The only instructors that would be close to you would be in Franklin at Nine Months and Beyond with Micky (she is a doula too). 

 

I got to attend one of my good friend's (and students) births two weeks ago today and she used Hypnobabies.  She had a more traumatic first birth experience and watching her do it the second time was simply beautiful.  She was calm, confident and although her birthing time was still somewhat long, once she kicked into active labor, she had the baby very quickly and peacefully. 

 

Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

 

Leigh Anne

www.chattanoogahypnobabies.com

http://confessionsofamisplacedalaskan.wordpress.com

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#37 of 51 Old 01-24-2011, 02:14 PM
 
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I agree that you sound like you have a lot of fear about whether you can do this or not. Trust me, YOU CAN! I just had my second child in July.  There was alot going on during my pregnancy and I questioned myself a bit as well. Remember: fear->tension->pain.  If you feel afraid, you won't open up as easily. You have to relax to get your bottom to open up. Something beautiful to remember is that you are connecting with every mother from all time in this experience.  What helped me was to read birth stories and then visualize my own coming experience. Ina May's books are a really good place to start. "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" as well as "Spiritual Midwifery" are just stuffed full of great birth stories and ideas. Not only were the stories encouraging  but also demonstrated great ideas for getting over fear and  relaxing. (I actually "Moo-ed" at my husband in the hospital, not only to relax my bottom, but to laugh about it. It worked!)  It is a great idea to get your birth team together, people to support and encourage you not only through childbirth, but during your pregnancy and postpartum.  It really helped me to have good women around me who were caring for my needs and cheering me on.  If you still would be interested in having a doula, I would like to extend my hand of friendship. I know I live in Franklin, but I pass through Clarksville at least 3 times a month. I have a large lending library, and am studying midwifery. I'm trying to get experience and would be honored to help support a sister mom birth a soul into this world. If you are interested, private message me.

Even with whatever you decide, I'll be praying for you and your baby. I'm sure your experience at the Farm will be lovely. I went to the MANA conference in October and met many of the midwives and some of their apprentices. They are some really sweet, groovy gals!

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#38 of 51 Old 01-24-2011, 05:22 PM
 
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"...the whole "trust birth" thing makes me a little....I don't know. I am cynical, dry, sarcastic, witty, etc, to begin with..."

 

So, you're me then? winky.gif

 

I was lucky enough to really "click" with the midwife who delivered my first two, but when I was delivering #3 here in SC and couldn't go back across the country to be with her, I found myself really caught up in trust/pain issues. I considered the Farm very seriously, because I truly believed I would be safer there, but ultimately had a hospital birth with a requested (not pushed in the least) epidural. I had reached a place emotionally where I truly did not WANT the emotional interdependence with a MW and the intense physical and emotional experience of a natural birth. Been there, done that. I was done with it.  

 

I mention this only to say that from your posts and the decisions you've been making, it seems to me that you are very much NOT done with it, and I think you've made an excellent choice of delivery location where you're very likely to find people who have experience in helping women handle that business. And you're probably not the first cynic with a rough first birth under their belt who has ever sought care at The Farm. 

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#39 of 51 Old 01-28-2011, 12:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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See, the thing is, I *have* read Spiritual Midwifery and Ina May's Guide. But when it came time for *my* birth, it seemed nothing like those stories. Sure, some women did say how painful it was, etc, but it's different reading it versus FEELING it. The good stuff sticks with you, but when someone writes "it was the worst pain I ever felt" it just doesn't translate. So I went to fear very quickly because I felt like I didn't have control, and I didn't know how to get control.  :(  

 

I think I expected the pain to be painful, but more...normal, somehow. 


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#40 of 51 Old 01-29-2011, 09:16 AM
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i think the point is that you shouldn't have control during labor.  The more in control you are, the more tensed you are which perpetuates a fear-tension-pain cycle.  The more relaxed and uninhibited you are, the less pain.  You need to let the labor take over and let go of it.  My doula was telling me that it makes her nervous how much i am reading.  I would really recommend Mind Over Labor by Carl Jones though - great guided imagery.  And I found some cheaper hypnobirthing type tapes on amazon that I got.  I'm also listening to another guided imagery CD.  The Bradley Book by McCutcheson really explains the tension-pain cycle and really taking one contraction at a time - no more than that.

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#41 of 51 Old 01-29-2011, 09:19 AM
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Also I am finding that, in some ways, I have more apprehension going into my second birth than w/ my first.  with the first, it was just all unknown and there was some fear w/ that and could I really do it.  But now having done it (which I did not have an epidural and overall it was a good experience), but my son had the cord wrapped around his neck with some brief distress (heart rate went down to 40) and I had a 3rd degree tear.  So those two things almost make me a little more nervous this second time around.  And I must say i am really glad to have a doula to help me.  And she really, really wants me to deal wtih any fear I have now, so I am not bringing it to the birth and can really let go.

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#42 of 51 Old 01-29-2011, 09:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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i think the point is that you shouldn't have control during labor.  The more in control you are, the more tensed you are which perpetuates a fear-tension-pain cycle.  The more relaxed and uninhibited you are, the less pain.  You need to let the labor take over and let go of it.  My doula was telling me that it makes her nervous how much i am reading.  I would really recommend Mind Over Labor by Carl Jones though - great guided imagery.  And I found some cheaper hypnobirthing type tapes on amazon that I got.  I'm also listening to another guided imagery CD.  The Bradley Book by McCutcheson really explains the tension-pain cycle and really taking one contraction at a time - no more than that.


I know. I get it. I do. But for some reason, although it makes perfect sense to me, and I tried to relax during my first labor, my brain just went somewhere else, away from the logic I was telling myself. I don't really relax on a normal day, so in labor...LOL. Maybe I have a bad attitude eyesroll.gif Sheepish.gif I don't know. I'm just...difficult to convince. Difficult to convince my brain to actually think this stuff. I KNOW in my heart what you're saying. I just can't seem to execute it when the time comes. In most things I usually do have control, so that must be my roadblock. 

 

Can I just mention (not being snarky, but kind of laughing about it) that I, too, have been reading a ton, and it's funny that you say your doula is nervous about how much you're reading...and then you recommend a book. duck.gif  orngtongue.gif   What I've been telling myself is that my labor will go *my* way, not an Ina-May-birth-story way. And if it doesn't live up to how wonderful those all sound, it's just fine. This time around I am trying to have no expectations of what THIS labor will be like. Reading birth stories does help me to get ideas on things to do in labor. But the first time I think they set up some expectations that, when not met, discouraged/scared me a lot.

 

I also read the Bradley/McCutcheon book the first time. Loved it! And yet...my brain "went there" imagining hours and hours of pain, and how many more, etc. I need to learn to shut that off. I need to stop thinking about how bad it can be! 

 

I recently told my MW that basically I am a pain in the butt and if she decided she didn't like me or want to deal with me anymore she should just tell me. She just kind of laughed and said we'd be fine, and then said many women feel this way but they are not as vocal about it as me.  redface.gif

 

 

 

I'm SO torn about where to birth. (Farm, Vanderbilt, or Home.)  I posted a separate thread about it in B&B. My DD (who will be 2yo for the birth) is a key factor for me that I can't let go. 

 


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#43 of 51 Old 01-31-2011, 12:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So...Gateway Medical Center in Clarksville. Can anyone tell me about it, the good the bad and the ugly?

 

I'm tossing and turning over home birth, and Gateway would be my transfer location. Is it awful there?

 


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#44 of 51 Old 03-03-2011, 09:09 PM
 
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Hi! I have not birthed at gateway, but if you are still looking for a doula, I know one who is very familiar with gateway. Even if you are not looking to hire her, I'm sure she would have some information for you. 

http://laboroflovedoulaservice.weebly.com

 

 

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#45 of 51 Old 03-18-2011, 09:45 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks! I have contacted her.

Right now I think we're going with the Vandy MWs. I'm just not sure I'm up for the potential of transferring again from a home birth. Too much risk, in that sense, for my psyche.

I'm not sure how I feel about it all. greensad.gif We'll see in June, I guess.

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#46 of 51 Old 03-19-2011, 02:24 PM
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Just wanted to say that we had baby #2 w/ a doula.  I've had 2 hospital births - one w/ and one w/out.  The doula made a huge difference.  She did accupressure to speed up my labor.  And during transition she had me in the shower on a birth ball . She did hip squeezes (was really feeling the contractions in my lower back and rectum) while my hubby sprayed warm water on my abdomen.  Made a HUGE difference, and my hubby and I said 'how did we do this by ourselves with #1?" 

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#47 of 51 Old 03-30-2011, 11:09 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks! I've contacted a doula! This will be a huge load off my mind if she is available. smile.gif I totally needed a doula the first time around and didn't have one.

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#48 of 51 Old 08-08-2011, 02:28 PM
 
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Hi, I am also in Clarksville and looking for birthing options. I was just curious if you did decide on the Vandy Midwives and how your experience was? How was the drive there once you were in labor and how was the longish drive home when you probably were just ready to be HOME! Any advice would be much appreciated!

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#49 of 51 Old 08-08-2011, 06:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi, I am also in Clarksville and looking for birthing options. I was just curious if you did decide on the Vandy Midwives and how your experience was? How was the drive there once you were in labor and how was the longish drive home when you probably were just ready to be HOME! Any advice would be much appreciated!


Well, I was there for only a short time. My labor very suddenly accelerated and we hurried up and got in the car. I was FINE at home and then all of a sudden...WHAM. I was biting a pillow and almost screaming during contractions (I guess I have hard labors eyesroll.giflol.gif ) Anyway...DH went anywhere from 70-90mph based on whether I was screaming in the back seat or not. In between contractions I was chugging my RRL tea infusion.

They made me sit in triage for 20 minutes and that part was awful (because I was hollering for 'help'...what kind of help, I don't know, lol) They said I was 4cm. I walked to a delivery room and squatted in the (dry) shower, yanked on the handrail, bit my hand...moved to the bed and had a bit of nitrous (very helpful teeny tiny intervention that I wish I could've not opted for, but I was in a LOT of pain and quite scared. My doula hadn't arrived yet...) So, we were in triage at 1:15-1:30 or so...baby was out in 2-3 pushes at 2:58. So...I don't recall very much because my birth felt like a freight train to me (DD was 21 hours of labor, 2 hrs 15 min of pushing....so VERY different.)

All in all, we were treated with much respect and they are very low intervention. They really do try to help you have a NCB if that's what you want. I'd go there again if I ever had the chance. The option for nitrous...you can't get that anywhere else.

I was nervous about the drive home but my little guy slept the whole way, and we ate takeout sandwiches. smile.gif

p.s. if you need a doula, which I'd personally recommend, IMO due to the hospital setting, which was a little uncomfortable for me based off my first birth which was a bad experience.....please contact Heidi Rau Duncan. She's great! She will meet with you for no cost so you can meet her and talk, see if you like her style, etc. My labor went so fast that I was already getting nitrous when she arrived (and thus over the very scary/painful/hard part...but overall she was great for us.

Feel free to ask more questions or PM me. Sorry if I sound all over the place but I'm trying to get DS to sleep right now.

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#50 of 51 Old 08-09-2011, 01:34 PM
 
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Thank you for the response and the advice! I know you're busy busy!! I will definitely contact Heidi to see if she's a good fit. It's hard being in a new place where you don't have any friends or family to ask for their opinions. Our first appointment is tomorrow with a regular OB near Gateway. We'll see how it goes! BTW, I am here in Clarksville, over off of Dover Road, if you ever have any questions or anything. Thanks again!

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#51 of 51 Old 08-09-2011, 01:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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You're welcome! Look up Clarksville Birth Pros on Facebook, too. Lots of doula info there as well. Midwives, too, I think. The Vandy MWs have their own FB page. Not trying to be negative or scare you, but I've heard so many bad things about Gateway in terms of not being very natural birth friendly. I hope you have a good experience with your OB. smile.gif

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