DS 2008, DD 2010, DS 2013
I was on the fence about not having pain medication, and Kathy told me that I probably should have it because I was clearly out of control.
I haven't attended any births other than my DS', didn't even watch lots of videos, so I don't know what that looks like vs. a normal lady vocalizing & moving with ctrx.
I could tell I was in a negative feedback type of cycle -- I'm sure there was more than one way out. I had a nice birth, I don't regret my choices.
So many responses...
About Mercy vs. HoCo - I'd take Mercy. I'd also recommend touring Special Beginnings birth center and interviewing their midwives for a birth at AAMC.
I think with any provider, if your labor is progressing well and they aren't in any hurry personally then you are fine to labor as you please with no time limits or pressure. The true test is what they do when that isn't the case.
Had a friend birth with Kathy at Mercy and they made her consent to AROM to check for meconium before letting her in the tub. This isn't necessary. Thankfully, SB doesn't have such a policy.
The only hospital you can give birth in a tub is Mercy. Others have tubs some small and some big but no births allowed. If you want a water birth, birth at Mercy, Special Beginnings birth center or home. But as you can now see, birthing at Mercy in water requires everything to go perfectly including one of the two tub rooms actually being available!
And, yes, Jasper, more support is what you needed. I'm so sorry you didn't have that. "out of control" can be defined as anything not silent potentially. Women do moan but you need someone to make it a healthy moan. Some women scream and that is their thing but are they progressing and handling it anyway. But drugs isn't the cure. It's an intervention that makes the birth attendant's experience easier. Not yours! However, if you are ill-prepared or for some other reason cannot focus and relax at all and are pressured to either do an epidural/narcotic to relax you to hopefully allow things to progress or cesarean, then some choose drugs. But honestly, with the right prep, a supportive birth team, that is not necessary. You are so right!
Your student said the MW used "perineal massage" is that that action also referred to as "vagina wrenching" - taking 2 fingers from each hand, pulling outwards at the 3 o'clock & 9 o'clock positions, & sweeping down towards the anus?
if so - ick ick ick! I though that was found to only increase the risk of tears & make them worse? (from irritating & thus inflaming the tissues.) Plus, based on the description I read on the birth professionals forum, it sounds so violent, horrible, & even cruel. Logically, it also doesn't make much sense to me either... Sure, counter-pressre as baby is crowning, I can see making sense. But trying to wrench the vagina open by yanking it apart? Um, no. I don't get that.
So if it wasn't that 'wrenching' open, what was it? Sorry to derail the thread, just curious!
In my experience, Special Beginnings has also AROM'd to check for meconium and then required mom to be out of the tub.
While I was there another mom arrived, labored, and delivered in the tub. Her waters broke while she was pushing in the tub. She didn't get out until after the baby was born. I know because she LOUDLY NARRATED the whole thing.
Mom to (11/08) and (4/11)
Good point. Most women who have had any history of SA doesn't want perineal massage, cervical exams (or the least amount truly necessary), any kind of contact inside for any reason. I've had a few clients with this situation and some of my students too. They have had such a deep and scarring history that it does make a HUGE difference in their ability to "let go" and have their baby. It feels like the SA all over again!
It isn't necessary for all women but can be very useful in some to help avoid a worse tear. Hot compresses can do wonders and even better - laboring/birthing in WATER!
perineal massage PRIOR to labor (self-administered) is beneficial, but during labor it is not, and they're stopping the recommendation of it. Instead compresses as counterpressure on the perineum seem to do better at preventing tears.
I've also read a description somewhere of a more gentle 'rubbing' type of perineal massage, concentrated down towards the anus (no yanking apart witdh-wise.) Is that what you mean?
I read on that same thread on the birth pros forum that someone saw an OB "bust a mama's perinium wide open." She wrote it was horrible & even the OB seemed surprised & horrified.
I'm not an SA survivor, but the 'wrenching' thing sounds awful to me. As I wrote, it sounds downright violent & I certainly would think it would not only inhibit, but anger me.
I didn't read up on it too extensively, but I think I remember reading that the jury is sorta still out on it - some studies show benefit some don't. But the pre-labor massage in late pregnancy, many women find to be uncomfortable & possibly painful. So I thought 'to heck with it.'
I have no idea what this "wrenching" perineal massage is. I've yet to see a midwife do any type of stretching that hurt the mother. They mostly use hot compresses, and in a long pushing stage may use some perineal massage but nothing that looks to be (or is reported to be by the client) painful or harmful as they are just using oil sometimes and sometimes lube to make the skin stretchy as the head is coming in preparation for birth to avoid a tear.
I'd say, ask a midwife you work with for more info and definitely talk to your providers to make sure they don't do something you don't want them to.
Enjoy your babymoon, and when you are ready to get out of the house, think about joining our new mom's group at Mercy, Mondays 10:00am.