Whats the Story with Alternative Birth Choices and Evelyn? - Page 3 - Mothering Forums
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Maryland, Metro D.C. Area, Delaware > Whats the Story with Alternative Birth Choices and Evelyn?
AHodges's Avatar AHodges 07:04 PM 10-22-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by mysticmomma View Post

Negative reviews, especially of ABC are almost immediately deleted here on MDC. I tried to post my horrible experience with her and was given warnings or points or whatever and had my thread deleted not just from here in the tribe but also from my DDC where I was venting.


Why is that?  It seems like they'd want people to have all of the information, not just the positive.  I've heard of other comments being deleted because they disagree with the majority, and I find it disappointing.  Everyone here is an adult, I think they can handle respectful disagreement.
 

 



mairicnm's Avatar mairicnm 07:12 PM 10-22-2011

I would respectfully suggest that anyone who is a client of Evelyn, Joey, or any other midwife CONTACT YOUR MIDWIFE and ask any questions you may have, rather than speculating here.  I've never heard so many wild rumors!  Every midwife has multiple ways of getting in touch with her--call, text, email, facebook message, or show up at her office!  Wondering "aloud" on this forum only starts rumors and invites bad feelings, both of which could be avoided by getting your info straight from the source.


Jenga's Avatar Jenga 07:57 PM 10-22-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by AHodges View Post

Why is that?  It seems like they'd want people to have all of the information, not just the positive.  I've heard of other comments being deleted because they disagree with the majority, and I find it disappointing.  Everyone here is an adult, I think they can handle respectful disagreement. 

 



One would think this would be true. There could easily be a disclaimer (there might be already in the TOU) that people are responsible for their own words. It's a CYA legal thing, but they on;y have to worry about it if they're hosting lies that damage a reputation or business. Of course it's hard to tell who is lying when it's strangers online. 

 

I just had an experience with a midwife who wasn't truthful to me and I wish I had heard that other people had problems with her also. I would have never thought to check on something if someone on this forum hadn't said something about it. I trusted that what my midwife told me was the truth from the start. Talking to your midwife isn't always possible because of several things that could be going on, especially if they won't talk to you and/or haven't been truthful. I am very grateful for the people I spoke to on here. I don't know them in person, but they really helped me to find peace because I knew that what happened ultimately wasn't something I had done wrong but that there was a problem from the beginning. 

 

I am not saying that is what happened here, obviously you want to try and talk to your midwife first. Evelyn's situation, and her patients are not what I am talking about. 


BenimBebek's Avatar BenimBebek 12:55 AM 10-23-2011

There's one thing I think we all need to remember.  Midwives are not like a normal business.  I think some of us go into it expecting it to be "consumer driven,"  but MW's are in a strange position where they get to know you intimately, they really become your friend, but they also need to get paid, because its their job.

 

And lets not forget, not everyone is meant to be friends.  Some people's personalities JUST DONT MESH.  Pregnant moms are very sensitive and on high alert emotionally to this.  While I agree that is very important that all womens voices are heard in regards to their experiences, assuming that because one person didn't get along with a midwife, doesnt a) reflect on her abilities, and b) doesn't mean that many many other women do and will.

 

I think that we all need to take a step back.  WE ARE GOING TO LOSE HOMEBIRTH IN MARYLAND.  And not because it was dangerous, but over administrative and organizational reasons.  This is HORRIFYING to me.

 

I would gladly wait 3 hours for an appointment to see an overworked Home Birth Midwife, if it meant I could keep my baby and myself away from a hospital. Let's not pretend that hospital MWs and OBs are any different.  With my first I went to 4 OB practices before I found an OB I liked.  There aren't enough Homebirth midwives to find one whose personality is perfect for everyone.  

 

In light of the direction my thread has taken, originally a fact finding mission, I am asking that the moderator please remove it.  The facts have been found and in my opinion do not reveal anything other than a major disconnect between want women want in this State and what todays archaic medical practice is.

 

Hopefully the Moderator will remove this and everyone can take their complaints and their positive reviews to the Reviews section.

 

BB


IdentityCrisisMama's Avatar IdentityCrisisMama 08:24 AM 10-23-2011

Out of respect for you, BB, I will keep my response brief and possibly start a spin-off thread.  Here is an article that may put some minds a ease.  On one hand it is somewhat depressing to know that MD has been fighting this same fight for so many years.  OTOH, perhaps it helps to know that we have come out the other end of the climate we're in now before.  The following is an article about the midwife crisis in MD published in 1995: 

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/articles/5929/midwife-crisis

 

As for the latest theme of this thread I would respectfully say midwives in MD who use the internet to promote business through web-sites, facebook and MDC itself and yet tell mothers how to behave when using these resources themselves is somewhat...I can't think of a good word...hierarchical?  And fellow mothers who sign up to MDC to tell other mothers to shush, well, they sound a bit cultish quite frankly.     Then there is this element of "here, let me have my say, now everyone else be quite" that is just weird to say the least.  

 

Essentially, if you (the general "you" - the community) are using the internet to draw clients with web-pages and facebook sites, MDC to promote and discuss your practice and homebirth in general and etc.  It seems distasteful to me to use the internet for what it has to offer and then ask mothers not do the same.   

 

And MDC and Mothering Magazine, of all places, is where many of your clients and perhaps you yourself have come to support and gather information about homebirth.  This is part of the movement - has been before, I imagine, any of us have been on the scene.  I think mothers come here because this is a "safe place" to discuss the issue.  I can see how discussing rumors or negative experiences is for sure a touchy situation but I think many people feel like MDC is a place to do so under the protective umbrella of a site in support of homebirth.  

 

PM me if anyone is interested in discussing in a broad sense the issue of the internet and homebirth in MD.  


IdentityCrisisMama's Avatar IdentityCrisisMama 09:47 AM 10-23-2011


Regarding the topic often touched upon in this thread of whether MDC hosts negative reviews of care providers, this thread offers clarification: http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1333686/review-policy-for-healthcare-provider-clarification-site-guidelines-different-in-two-places

 

CM has stated that the policy Healthy_Baby quoted earlier in the thread is no longer relevant and has been removed.  The new policy is under the review section and reads:

 

"We allow for both positive and negative reviews. Negative reviews must not be written ‘off the cuff’ with spiteful intent, but with the intention of alerting other members to negative experiences. All responses need be constructive and tactful in nature on all accounts."  

 

http://www.mothering.com/community/products/guidelines-for-writing-reviews


Jenga's Avatar Jenga 12:05 PM 10-23-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by IdentityCrisisMama View Post

Regarding the topic often touched upon in this thread of whether MDC hosts negative reviews of care providers, this thread offers clarification: http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1333686/review-policy-for-healthcare-provider-clarification-site-guidelines-different-in-two-places

 

CM has stated that the policy Healthy_Baby quoted earlier in the thread is no longer relevant and has been removed.  The new policy is under the review section and reads:

 

"We allow for both positive and negative reviews. Negative reviews must not be written ‘off the cuff’ with spiteful intent, but with the intention of alerting other members to negative experiences. All responses need be constructive and tactful in nature on all accounts."  

 

http://www.mothering.com/community/products/guidelines-for-writing-reviews



So if we're going to name a provider, it has to be in the reviews section? If we're voicing frustrations and don't name someone... can it stay where it is? As a vent and not a "review"?


Healthy_Baby's Avatar Healthy_Baby 12:57 PM 10-23-2011

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by IdentityCrisisMama View Post

 

CM has stated that the policy Healthy_Baby quoted earlier in the thread is no longer relevant and has been removed.  The new policy is under the review section and reads:

 

"We allow for both positive and negative reviews. Negative reviews must not be written ‘off the cuff’ with spiteful intent, but with the intention of alerting other members to negative experiences. All responses need be constructive and tactful in nature on all accounts."  

 

http://www.mothering.com/community/products/guidelines-for-writing-reviews

 

Thank you finding this out!  I'm glad for this info AND the change in the policy. Hopfully people will respect and follow the part that that you've quoted above. I see the link the to the OLD policy's artical has been deleted.

 

Jenga: I hope you don't mind - I posted your above question (without quotting you) to the here >http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1333686/review-policy-for-healthcare-provider-clarification-site-guidelines-different-in-two-places  because I'm wondering the same thing! :)


Jenga's Avatar Jenga 01:13 PM 10-23-2011

I don't mind. I only came here after googling my former midwife's name, I post on another forum mostly where they don't delete or censor (generally) so I'm curious as to where the line is here.


adinal's Avatar adinal 01:27 PM 10-23-2011

Hi folks.  Negative reviews of healthcare providers are *not* hosted in the forum section.  We will host them in the Reviews section.  Part of the reason is for us, liability.  Because we actively moderate the threads on MDC, we could be see as endorsing a negative review, thus opening us up to being sued if said provider takes legal action.  The reviews section is *NOT* moderated in this manner, and thus we are able to host negative reviews there, because we do not alter the content. 

 

Thank you for understanding.  I am closing this thread now, and will remove it in the morning (monday)


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