Looking for a pediatrician - Alexandria area - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 12-01-2011, 05:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hello! My daughter is 11 weeks old and we currently take her to Kidz Docs. Our experiences have been mostly good except when we tried to discuss cosleeping. I'd love to hear about others' experiences -- have you found a cosleeping-friendly pediatrician in this area? Or how have you discussed cosleeping with a traditionally-minded pediatrician?

Thanks!
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#2 of 3 Old 01-02-2012, 10:05 PM
 
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:) I am not familiar with the care provider that you listed but being a natural mom for 6 plus years I was going through lots of problems typical for natural-minded baby-centered first time mom

who was finding and discovering the parenting...

 

having said that..

 

I can quote many who would answer your question somewhat like this:

"why in heaven are you discussing parenting style with your doctor?"

 

What I learned so far is that doctor's for most parts are not an expert in parenting and why should they be? Co-sleeping is not a medical condition, is not also a doctor's expertiese. They do have an opinion about it but from my perspective it is not more valid then that of my postman or hairstylist.

It is just an opinion. Doctor is a person who is trained in treating medical condition and as such they have not been training in parenting choices and implications, they do not have investment emotional, nor other in your child and they will advise you if you ask because they feel compelled.

The same goes to breastfeeding - why doctor would make this choice for anyone?

Why would the doctor have to be right about this?

 

There is a plethora of information and facts out there about co-sleeping safety and only you can decide and take responsibility. I know that many people wants to know from doctor's mouth if it is okay.. and get their blessing as it was transfering responsibility as if what if something happen..

however bear in mind that whatever happen.. SIDS do happen in cribs .. even more so then in co sleeping so if doc will recommend crib? and somthing happens is he or will he be responsible? Not really... the same as if you will co sleep by his or her advice.. you are the one to take risks and responsibilities for all the choices.

 

I learned to dig the facts and make decission for myself as a parent we do need to do that oftentimes. Doctors simply have the same access to the same information and so you may skip entirely some aspects like that. if you read enough... it still comes to your own decission.

 

Not to lecture on is it good or bad to cosleep because I am totally biased :) I am totally baby centered, I loath the idea of throwing a baby across the house into the dark lonely room alone

and call it good mothering because I feel the baby's fears I am a total emphat and I would not do upon what I wouldn't like to be done to me... yet I know that many people have limitations and I do not judge them... we all know our limitations and options...

 

I simply am very probaby in parent's room.. even if it is not in the same bed.

My baby was crazy about not falling asleep next to me in our bed period :) just no way..

so I did go half way.. I had a crib next to my bed and at some point we removed the front

wall so I had full access to the child who had own space yet was totally accessible to me,

no night walking to pick up for feeding.. etc.. so it was brilliant :) and safe from my opinion.

 

will it work for everybody? my hubby was not happy with it but he got used to it and

it grew on him and he would not have it any other way after a while.

it took him time to understand that sleeping alone in a dark room when a baby is little

is unnatural and if all animals have right to sleep with their mothers so does the human baby :)

and also that there is so many articles by Harvard experts suggesting brain damage from the

fear at this age and all the CIO business.. so he gave in.

 

So that is me... six years later, we still are together in one room and we love it. she has her

own bed, we do have ours... I know that one day she will just bag for her room and not too long from now, till then it is really comfy to know that if something sqicks at night or the pipe clings

she is not waking up with nightmares and screaming from across the hallway, she is next to her parents, feeling safe and secure.

 

I don't mean to tell you what to do with your parenting choices and tell you at all waht to do,

I just wanted to show the way I went and how It worked for me personally.. as

when I was  a little mom.. as we grow as mothers too.. I used to think that I can't make certain decissions, then I learned that yes, actually I am THE only person who has to make certain decissions because NO ONE knows better what my child and my family needs are.

Not my doctor not my family not my friends, who not only were and are all well-wishing but

also have different opinions among themselves so who really is to know?

 

:)

 

Hugs

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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#3 of 3 Old 01-03-2012, 06:32 AM
 
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"why in heaven are you discussing parenting style with your doctor?"

 

Ditto.  This was my exact response to this question when originally posted.  You have so many resources available in your community where you can explore your parenting options - family, books, support groups, limitless information and personal stories on the internet.  Your ped practice is just one tiny part of that, and not an expert on either co-sleeping or on you and your baby, as the previous poster wonderfully described. 

 

You can look for Attachment Parenting  and La Leche League groups in your area and meet other moms who think like you do.  You can surround yourself with a supportive peer group and mother with confidence.

 

There are so many factors involved in choosing your baby doc.  If you are otherwise happy, just don't mention this topic again.

 

Or if you are still looking, one doc to consider if you want to change is Dr. Natasha Lewry Beauvais, MD, Alexandria, Family Practice.  I don't specifically know her view on co-sleeping, but from my experience with her I expect she would be.  She is supportive of other natural parenting choices.

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