Seeking some advice about choosing a homebirth midwife - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 02-06-2010, 07:25 PM - Thread Starter
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I thought I had chosen a midwife, but after my first appt, I'm not sure.
I have twins boys and planned a home birth for their birth, but in the end I had a c-section. It's a long complicated story and a traumatic one.
The midwives I had planned to use didn't come through as a pair, and when I went into labor I didn't have anyone there to attend. It was unexpected and this time around I want to choose a midwife that I can trust, who has experience, and has a nice blend of warm and fuzzy, nurturing loving/ attention to physiological realities and changing circumstances.
I don't expect anything to go awry, however I want a midwife who listens to me and to herself.

I live in the boston area, somerville to be exact and have interviewed 2 midwives (Audra and Deborah). I have ruled out 2 others from the past (Heater L and Nancy W). Many are simply not experienced enough for me to be comfortable, Ann Kilroy is not available, Kelly Faulker is in Africa, and originally the rest seemed too far away, but I'm open to travel to them.

Is there someone who seems like a good fit for the description I've given?
I know it is a very personal decision, so perhaps can anyone offer me any advise in making this choice.

I feel nervous about choosing the RIGHT person, as it doesn't seem that all the pieces fit perfectly together with any one midwife, so I need to weigh options here, and I just want to choose someone that I connect with, trust completely, and respect at the end of the process.

Thank you so much.
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#2 of 9 Old 02-06-2010, 11:43 PM
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I worked with Audra and Tara Kenny as a pair and they worked well together and complimented each other well. I had an uncomplicated pregnancy and birth, but I also wanted a very hands off (unless I needed it) experience. They listened to me and gave me information when they thought it was important but respected my decisions. I feel very blessed to have had exactly the kind of experience that I wanted to have. One thing I appreciated is that I didn't know how I'd be in labor and when the midwives arrived, they instantly tuned into it and respected that I wanted to be left largely alone and in silence.

It's hard to know what to say because somethings that are not important to others are important to me and viceversa. I had a great experience with them and would certainly have a baby with them again. PM me if you have specific questions.

I hope this pregnancy and birth are a more joyful experience for you.

mama to Rassa, born 12/9/09
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#3 of 9 Old 02-07-2010, 02:19 AM
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Tara and Audra will also be attending my homebirth in May, and while I haven't yet met Audra, I absolutely love Tara. I wanted someone with a realistic approach and a good head on her shoulders...I don't know that personally I would be all that comfortable with a midwife that leaned heavily towards spiritual midwifery - and Tara has fit that bill really well so far. She's very good with info (her knowledge of nutrition is superb and so helpful) and really *listens*. She's in Cambridge.

Em, married to Alex, mom to Samantha (11 yrs) and Cullen (5yrs) and Maybe (5/16/2010) Trying to grow 4,000lbs of produce on .2 acres. See my blog!
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#4 of 9 Old 02-07-2010, 01:22 PM
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#5 of 9 Old 02-07-2010, 03:15 PM
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I had Paige Eastman Dickenson AND Joyce Kimball. LOVE them both. Both very professional, intelligent and experienced. I actually switched to them at 38 weeks after being under the care of a midwife on your list (who you ruled out) who totally freaked out. I would STRONGLY recommend going with a midwife that is a CPM and not just a DEM.

Good luck in your search, pm me if you have any more questions.
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#6 of 9 Old 03-13-2010, 09:38 PM
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bumping this because it looks like I'm looking for the same and info and don't want to lose it.
I'm in Arlington

Children deserve the respect of puzzling it out.
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#7 of 9 Old 03-14-2010, 04:02 PM
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I'm using Joyce for my HBAC this summer. She's absolutely wonderful and I'm pretty sure she travels to your area. Good luck!

Alison: BFing, BWing, ERFing mama to KidA (12/25/07) and KidO (6/26/10) nocirc.giffamilybed2.gif

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#8 of 9 Old 03-14-2010, 09:21 PM
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I used Deborah for my birth 16 months ago. I loved her prenatal. She really is the most calm, caring wonderful woman you could meet. She was wonderful at my birth, but she only came with her very very new student. If you go with her, I would make sure that another experienced midwife will be there with you.
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#9 of 9 Old 03-14-2010, 11:29 PM
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My midwife is Joyce Kimball. After a very traumatic second birth, I was very nervous about who I should hire. She is amazing, she understands the psychological aspect of pregnancy and birth, and I feel like she is really in tune with me and my family.

Catherinepraying.gif traditional Catholic mama to bikenew.gifjammin.gifdiaper.gif wife to an amazing man.selectivevax.gifnocirc.giffamilybed1.gif

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