Vancouver(ish) Tribe: Sugared Mountains & Bare Branches - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 705 Old 12-01-2009, 06:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
flowmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 4,339
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
"Let us love winter, for it is the spring of genius.
- Pietro Aretino

Welcome Lower Mainland Mamas!
(and Mamas to Be)


All local mamas are welcome here! Visitors are welcome to pop in too. We are brought together by our passion for conscious/thoughtful/attachment/respectful/wholistic/natural parenting, not always agreeing on the path but agreeing to respectfully discuss, share, and learn together. Feel free to join in the conversation and introduce yourself!

This is our thread for chatting online, discussing issues relevant to the Lower Mainland, and arranging meetings in real life. If you have issues and questions that are not specific to the Vancouver area, please start a new thread in the appropriate MDC forum (e.g. breastfeeding, discipline, health, etc.). You can also post a link to your topic in this thread if you are requesting input from your tribe members. This allows us to
1. adhere to MDC guidelines;
2. keep questions and responses organized; and
3. reduce thread traffic and allow readers more control over which discussions they engage in.

Meet-ups are sporadic and include gatherings at parks, Science World, and people's homes. Anyone is welcome to suggest a gathering time/place. Meet-ups are either announced in the meet-up thread in the Canada Forum or here.

Remember that to get email notification of new posts in this thread, you can post to this thread to subscribe or you can use 'thread tools' and click 'subscribe'.

Please note that our Vancouver(ish) Tribe has other threads in the Canada Forum, including:

* Vancouver(ish) Meet-up thread
* Knitting Group Thread: look in the Canada forum
* Vancouver(ish) Doctors for Children
* Vancouver(ish) Dental Resources for Children
* FAQ: Greater Vancouver Area Liveability and Affordability

sharing life with | 10 yo ds | 8 yo dd | dh (since 2012)
"I am not what happened to me...I am what I choose to become." ~ Carl Jung
flowmom is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 of 705 Old 12-01-2009, 06:22 AM
 
artparent's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,726
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
two weeks til vancouver, mamas my shortest trip ever. we woke to frost on the terraced roofs and cars. my little one isn't well today, the girls are alternating i've finally settled into a routine around here, and now i need to pack up the whole house to have the floors done while we're away, so much for settling oh well!

tiffani, we made several dolls using this pattern, it is really easy. lucy might really enjoy helping you.

*
artparent is offline  
#3 of 705 Old 12-01-2009, 02:09 PM
 
dawncayden's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Vancouver BC Canada
Posts: 4,307
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

75% Crunchy 25% Smooth
Raising 2 peanuts. #3 due in June bellyhair.gif

dawncayden is offline  
#4 of 705 Old 12-01-2009, 03:23 PM
 
Ellp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Port Moody, BC
Posts: 3,805
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Gotta sub now or I'll forget...

It was frosty up on the mtn here last night! Warming up nicely now though...

Mama to Emma (7) and Sarah (5)

Ellp is offline  
#5 of 705 Old 12-01-2009, 05:26 PM
 
Ellp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Port Moody, BC
Posts: 3,805
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
What did I say? I forgot...

Mama to Emma (7) and Sarah (5)

Ellp is offline  
#6 of 705 Old 12-01-2009, 06:13 PM
Len
 
Len's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Sea to Sky
Posts: 2,481
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Subscribing! Happy winter everyone! The first day of December is double special for us, for it is Mateo's birthday hard to believe he is 3!

Robug, what about a Buddha board as gift? (wasn't it you who suggested it before?)

We are travelling to Spain for Christmas this year and we have so many people to spend the holidays with this year that I've been gathering/making small inexpensive gifts for a while now.
Len is offline  
#7 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 01:09 AM
 
robugmum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Vancouver BC
Posts: 1,721
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Oooooh, good idea! Thanks Len!
My kids love our Buddha Board!

We are leaving for Fiji on Thursday - I am trying to be excited but right now, I am mostly just stressed
robugmum is offline  
#8 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 02:23 AM
 
MaybeGracie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Burnaby, BC
Posts: 117
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I got a Buddha Board for SIL for Christmas - such a neat idea!

Less than two weeks until the baby is due! I think I'm pretty much ready - clothes washed, homebirth supplies ready, meals in the freezer, and MIL arriving on the 13th (hoping the baby stays put until then!).

Cynthia, loving my husband Isaac, my silly boy Jacob (Apr 07), my sweet little Luke (Dec 09), and my darling Lily (Aug 12)

MaybeGracie is offline  
#9 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 05:31 AM
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,772
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I was going to suggest a buddha board too, it would make a great family gift!

so stressed, so unmotivated... does anyone else find that the more things are piled on your plate the less you can bring yourself to do? *sigh* I can't wait for our babymoon... or, our baby and toddlermoon, as it were...

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
#10 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 02:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
flowmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 4,339
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by tiffani View Post
so stressed, so unmotivated... does anyone else find that the more things are piled on your plate the less you can bring yourself to do? *sigh*
maybe sit down, have a cup of tea, then set a timer and spend 15 minutes on your highest priority task -- insert question mark here because my silly keyboard isn`t working --

sharing life with | 10 yo ds | 8 yo dd | dh (since 2012)
"I am not what happened to me...I am what I choose to become." ~ Carl Jung
flowmom is offline  
#11 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 03:17 PM
 
Autumn Mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: chillaxin' with the chooks
Posts: 1,132
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Ksenia, have you tried shutting your computer down and then restarting it? This happens to me from time to time (can't figure out why...little hands using it maybe??), and it works. It's durned annoying. I recognized the apostrophe. The last power outage fixed it for me when it was happening a couple of weeks ago.

I love the Buddha Boards!! I remember seeing them posted here last year and I'd never seen them before. All waiting rooms should have one Where is the best/cheapest place to get/order one? Are there any sold locally??

tiffani, there must be sooo much going on in your brain and heart, no wonder you feel a bit zapped. I often get into the overwhelm feeling too, (temperament) and sharing the process with receptive and supportive friends is usually helpful, as is time to do my own thing outdoors. Gardening works wonders!! Plant some flower seeds in pots that will be growing and blooming when the littles come home?? I can just hear the story..."I planted these seeds of joy and hope and love when I was preparing to bring you both home...." Well, obviously this is my imagining, but you get my idea! Hoping you find some peace and inspiration and flow.

ERIN, : simple living mama, on the path to simplicity with DH, Scott, Matthew, 8 Brendan, 5 : and a garden full of
Autumn Mama is offline  
#12 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 06:03 PM
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,772
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
thanks ksenia and erin... I think it comes down to the fact that right now, there are so many HUGE things that are totally out of my control, and that, in and of itself is somewhat crippling to me. I find myself tied to the computer, waiting for news, looking for information, seeing what's going on with everyone else in the Ugandan adoption world (which is very topsy turvy right now - canadians can't bring kids home from there at all, and I'm terrified that the US will be swayed by the same guy who is lying to the canadian officials... luckily it seems that they've figured out the source of the problem and it will be resolved soon, but it's still scary)... not to mention just worrying that we won't be approved... it's just all really scary stuff, and I have this scream of stress lodged just under my throat. taking deep breaths helps, but it always comes back. we're really stressed financially right now (mark won't be getting two paychecks over christmas break, we owe tax money to the NZ gov, plus Uganda travel expenses coming up, and my parents will be here, and visitors are always expensive, with traveling, etc) and I know it will all be fine, but I'm just waiting for catastrophe to strike, yk? makes it hard to do the dishes.

and I know this conversation died with the last thread, but I was thinking about why certain types of dolls bothered me, and I think it's just that anything that resembles dolls from the slave era just has a lot of racist baggage tied to it, yk? it's silly, because I'm sure some of those dolls brought a lot of joy to the children of the slave era, but somehow buying those dolls as a white person feels icky. so it's easier to just stick to dolls that don't resemble those dolls at all, yk? some people collect "mammy dolls" and "golliwog dolls" and it just really creeps me out, especially since the latter is frequently used as a racist term... anyway, yeah, so that's my deal.

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
#13 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 06:58 PM
 
vancouverlori's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: BC Canada
Posts: 985
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Sending you good calm wishes, Tiffani! Well, if you can't control the rest of the world, you can at least control your dishes. Maybe... our dishwasher is brokedy-broke and so I'm having trouble with that one myself...

On the good news front, I finally picked a new fridge at the clearance centre to replace ours that was going kaput. It comes Friday. There were really cool tall skinny ones that I really wanted but they were 2" too tall and really, they were too small for our needs (only 11.4 cu. ft.) So we got the Whirlpool with the dented sides. Would have gone used, but DH didn't want to risk a lemon.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Autumn Mama View Post
I love the Buddha Boards!! I remember seeing them posted here last year and I'd never seen them before. All waiting rooms should have one Where is the best/cheapest place to get/order one? Are there any sold locally??
I definitely saw them at the Art Gallery shop. They also had smaller less expensive knock-offs. So they're around... Granville Island, maybe?

I'm still trying to figure out what to get my aunt's gentleman-friend (boyfriend just doesn't seem right). We're doing a simplified gift exchange among the adults again this year, and I got him as my recipient. He's an architect and rather well-off, so I'm not sure what I could get him... possibly a Buddha board, but...? If he wanted one, he probably has one!!!

Lori : mum to Emily (nov94) and Calvin (jul 03), : and : married to : Wes
vancouverlori is offline  
#14 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 08:58 PM
 
kdtmom2be's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 3,677
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Autumn Mama View Post
Ksenia, have you tried shutting your computer down and then restarting it? This happens to me from time to time (can't figure out why...little hands using it maybe??), and it works. It's durned annoying. I recognized the apostrophe. The last power outage fixed it for me when it was happening a couple of weeks ago.
I can't remember if restarting fixes it on my computer or not, but if you're on an HP laptop, there is an icon on the task bar that looks like a keyboard. If it's there, click on it and switch yourself back to US, you are in Canadian French. The other way that works on my laptop is to push shift and CTRL at the same time, but that may be product specific. However, that's usually how it gets into that mode (fairly frequently) because my left shift key is so small!

No time to weigh in on anything else here! Except to agree with dawn and say

Mom to Kayleigh (05/07) Jacob (05/09) and Ned decluttering 615/2010
kdtmom2be is offline  
#15 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 09:11 PM
 
Vancouver Mommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 1,618
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Does anybody know of a good preschool in Bby Heights? I am having such a difficult time finding something for my 4.5 yo dd. I'm not even 100% sold on the idea of preschool, but if full day K (ugh) becomes a reality I want her to have some experience being away from home on her own. The only ones I can find are either church run, montessori or too far away to walk. Gilmore School is quite close, but the preschool has been relocated to Kitchener School during the renos and that's about 15 blocks away. Eileen Daily has some sort of preschool program, but it doesn't really look like much more than 2 hours of child care.

Diane, SAHM to DD (June 05) and DS (April 07).
::::
Vancouver Mommy is offline  
#16 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 09:15 PM
 
dawncayden's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Vancouver BC Canada
Posts: 4,307
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Does anyone want a ice cream maker? It's probably from the 70's. Green plastic tub with metal motor on top.

PM me.

75% Crunchy 25% Smooth
Raising 2 peanuts. #3 due in June bellyhair.gif

dawncayden is offline  
#17 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 10:01 PM
 
Piglet68's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Vancouver Island, Canada
Posts: 10,977
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
tiffani's last post on the old thread made me realize that we've found the perfect senior name for Ksenia: Good with the Google!

Wow, tiffani, lots on your plate right now. Sending you peaceful vibes...

We're heading to the Island this weekend for a mini-vacation. Gonna check out the Comox Valley as neither of us have ever been there. Unfortunately Pealette won't be there this weekend but she recommended a good restaurant and hotel. I hope the weather is nice, I'm really looking forward to "getting away from it all"!

teapot2.GIF Homeschooling, Homesteading Mama to DD ('02) and DS ('04)  ribbonjigsaw.gif blogging.jpg homeschool.gif

Piglet68 is offline  
#18 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 10:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
flowmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 4,339
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Gosh tiffani. That's a lot of worries. I seem to be worrying a lot lately too, mostly about the financial mess we've gotten ourselves into. Wolfgang leaves his worries in the "worry tree" that his art therapist has. Seeming like a good idea right now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tiffani View Post
I was thinking about why certain types of dolls bothered me, and I think it's just that anything that resembles dolls from the slave era just has a lot of racist baggage tied to it, yk? it's silly, because I'm sure some of those dolls brought a lot of joy to the children of the slave era, but somehow buying those dolls as a white person feels icky. so it's easier to just stick to dolls that don't resemble those dolls at all, yk? some people collect "mammy dolls" and "golliwog dolls" and it just really creeps me out, especially since the latter is frequently used as a racist term... anyway, yeah, so that's my deal.
Yikes, sorry if any of the dolls that I linked to fall in that category! To be honest, I really don't know what dolls from the slave era would look like . Is it because you're American that you would have such insight? Or am I just clueless?

sharing life with | 10 yo ds | 8 yo dd | dh (since 2012)
"I am not what happened to me...I am what I choose to become." ~ Carl Jung
flowmom is offline  
#19 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 11:30 PM
 
Autumn Mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: chillaxin' with the chooks
Posts: 1,132
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Okay, so I found these instructions about removing the French Canadian keyboard map from the control panel...and it worked! Scroll down to the post by MarmaladeFreak and read her instructions...

Now I can do this.....ÉÉÉ (hitting shift/control at the same time makes it start...and then I click on shift/control/ again and it leaves!!! What fun, huh??? Clearly I have too much time on my hands today, lol!

Happy venturing, Mariah!! We love the Island too!

ERIN, : simple living mama, on the path to simplicity with DH, Scott, Matthew, 8 Brendan, 5 : and a garden full of
Autumn Mama is offline  
#20 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 11:39 PM
 
MaybeGracie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Burnaby, BC
Posts: 117
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Autumn Mama View Post
I love the Buddha Boards!! I remember seeing them posted here last year and I'd never seen them before. All waiting rooms should have one Where is the best/cheapest place to get/order one? Are there any sold locally??
I picked one up at this cute little artsy gift store in Horseshoe Bay Village.

Cynthia, loving my husband Isaac, my silly boy Jacob (Apr 07), my sweet little Luke (Dec 09), and my darling Lily (Aug 12)

MaybeGracie is offline  
#21 of 705 Old 12-02-2009, 11:49 PM - Thread Starter
 
flowmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 4,339
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Autumn!

??????

sharing life with | 10 yo ds | 8 yo dd | dh (since 2012)
"I am not what happened to me...I am what I choose to become." ~ Carl Jung
flowmom is offline  
#22 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 01:38 AM
 
Autumn Mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: chillaxin' with the chooks
Posts: 1,132
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksenia View Post

??????
I see you fixed it!

ERIN, : simple living mama, on the path to simplicity with DH, Scott, Matthew, 8 Brendan, 5 : and a garden full of
Autumn Mama is offline  
#23 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 01:56 AM
 
Ellp's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Port Moody, BC
Posts: 3,805
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Sending you peaceful vibes Tiffani!

Quote:
Originally Posted by vancouverlori View Post
I'm still trying to figure out what to get my aunt's gentleman-friend (boyfriend just doesn't seem right). We're doing a simplified gift exchange among the adults again this year, and I got him as my recipient. He's an architect and rather well-off, so I'm not sure what I could get him... possibly a Buddha board, but...? If he wanted one, he probably has one!!!
How about a bottle of wine or two? Add a couple of boxes of crackers, cheese, maybe some spreadable snacky type stuff if you really want to make it lush?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vancouver Mommy View Post
Does anybody know of a good preschool in Bby Heights? I am having such a difficult time finding something for my 4.5 yo dd. I'm not even 100% sold on the idea of preschool, but if full day K (ugh) becomes a reality I want her to have some experience being away from home on her own.
I thought the all day Kindergarten thing was an option? I wasn't aware that ALL Kindergartens had to be all day, only ones that choose to be?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Piglet68 View Post
We're heading to the Island this weekend for a mini-vacation. Gonna check out the Comox Valley as neither of us have ever been there. Unfortunately Pealette won't be there this weekend but she recommended a good restaurant and hotel. I hope the weather is nice, I'm really looking forward to "getting away from it all"!
Oh Mariah, if you're in Courteney, check out a restaurant called "Locals". Its right downtown. All the food is local (hence the name), organic and/or free range. They have a real chef do the cooking, and it is to die for. The prices are really good to for what you get. Comparable to Earl's or Red Robin, I'd say.

They were really considerate of the kids too, providing colouring pages and crayons. What really impressed me though was that the hostess (also the Chef's wife) explained that while they welcomed kids, they didn't believe in kid's menus and separate foods for the kids. She said they have grilled cheese sandwiches etc. from their lunch menu but the sandwiches would be made from organic mulitgrain bread with gourmet cheeses, and come with some kind of fruit spread. I had the kid's leftovers and it was the best grilled cheese I'd ever had. Yummm!

Mama to Emma (7) and Sarah (5)

Ellp is offline  
#24 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 03:17 AM
 
Alison's Mom's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,165
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vancouver Mommy View Post
Does anybody know of a good preschool in Bby Heights? I am having such a difficult time finding something for my 4.5 yo dd. I'm not even 100% sold on the idea of preschool, but if full day K (ugh) becomes a reality I want her to have some experience being away from home on her own. The only ones I can find are either church run, montessori or too far away to walk. Gilmore School is quite close, but the preschool has been relocated to Kitchener School during the renos and that's about 15 blocks away. Eileen Daily has some sort of preschool program, but it doesn't really look like much more than 2 hours of child care.
There's the one my son goes to: Franklin Preschool - it's in Vancouver, but just one block west of Boundary at Pandora. Not sure if that's too far for you, but we are about 5 or 6 blocks away from Gilmore preschool. There are a couple of spots in each class - 4 year olds would either be in the MWF am class from 9-11.30, or the mixed afternoon class, which runs M-Th 12.45-3, with option of doing 2, 3 or 4 days. PM me if you want more info (I'm on the board).

Mama to my two sweet monkeys - DD '04 and DS '06
Alison's Mom is offline  
#25 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 05:25 AM
 
Pealette's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Canadian West Coast
Posts: 323
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
"Oh Mariah, if you're in Courteney, check out a restaurant called "Locals". Its right downtown. All the food is local (hence the name), organic and/or free range. They have a real chef do the cooking, and it is to die for. The prices are really good to for what you get. Comparable to Earl's or Red Robin, I'd say. "

Too funny Ellaine, that's the one I recommended!

Janet is life learning and loving life with: Devin (10/02) :nana and The Littles through Marty (04/06) and Skye (05/08)
Pealette is offline  
#26 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 05:37 AM
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,772
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksenia View Post
Yikes, sorry if any of the dolls that I linked to fall in that category! To be honest, I really don't know what dolls from the slave era would look like . Is it because you're American that you would have such insight? Or am I just clueless?
no, I think it's because I'm in the "white parents adopting black children" world, and people are always looking for dolls, and this conversation happens a lot. none of the dolls you linked *are* dolls like that, but the one just kind of reminded me of them, and it's a tricky line to walk. there are a lot of rules for parents like us, and while some of them are silly and I refuse to adhere to them (sorry, not silly, but not something I want to perpetuate, like the "you have to have their hair in braids, it can't be left natural because "the black community" doesn't like that , or that black children have to behave differently than white children because the black community has different standards for their kids -- our four kids will all be treated differently in certain situations because of their race and genders, and we have to be realistic about that, but I'm fairly unapologetic anymore about the fact that they'll be black kids with white parents -- I can't change that, and it's not a bad thing, yk? luckily there are lots of them around these days, with adoption and interracial couplings and such, so the rules are changing, I think. I will always honor my kids wishes as they try to navigate their place in the world, but I'm not going to treat my white kids differently than my black kids, yk? that said, I have already started giving my kids "life lessons" that I think might be important for ALL of our kids to know, but only came to my attention because I will be raising black children, and unfortunately they have certain risk factors that middle class white kids usually don't, but I don't want to only send my black kids the message that you have to be very careful talking to police officers, so we've done that talk already. I'd love to think that race doesn't matter, but it does, sadly, so we have to prepare all of our kids for the ugly side, hopefully without making it seem uglier than it is.

ok, I'm rambling, off to bed!

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
#27 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 05:44 AM
 
widemouthedfrog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 2,022
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by tiffani View Post
I'm fairly unapologetic anymore about the fact that they'll be black kids with white parents -- I can't change that
I'm still relatively conflicted about international adoption (not that it is an option for us) but this is generally the conclusion I've come to.

I am so exhausted by dd's separation anxiety these days. I know that I need to start providing her with good tools to manage her anxiety and sadness, but all I want to do is give her a big hug.

Tricia, treehugger.gif wild.gif geek.gif mama of dd (6) 

widemouthedfrog is offline  
#28 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 06:34 AM
 
vancouverlori's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: BC Canada
Posts: 985
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vancouver Mommy View Post
Eileen Daily has some sort of preschool program, but it doesn't really look like much more than 2 hours of child care.
That's actually pretty standard for preschool. It's not the same as childcare, though there are daycares that also offer preschool programs. I totally see your point if you're going to be putting your child in school! Full-day kindy without prior schooly experience could be unduly stressful for a child.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellp View Post
I thought the all day Kindergarten thing was an option? I wasn't aware that ALL Kindergartens had to be all day, only ones that choose to be?
They're phasing it in over the next 2 years. Currently only high-risk public elementary schools have the full-day option (where they have high rates of poverty, ESL, etc) - and maybe some specialty programs.

Ksenia, I was so puzzled by your post (with the ???), until I read Erin/AutumnMama's post!

French keyboard map, eh? I'll have to figure that out for when I try to write stuff in French. I feel so awful when I can't put in the accents, because I do know perfectly well where they go!

Et maintenant c'est le temps de faire dodo!

Lori : mum to Emily (nov94) and Calvin (jul 03), : and : married to : Wes
vancouverlori is offline  
#29 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 06:38 AM
 
artparent's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,726
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
you can use the option key to find your french keys without changing the whole keyboard. é is option e, then e again. ç is just option c plain + simple...have fun. œ∑∑´®†¥¨ˆøπ“‘‘«æ…¬˚∆˙©ƒ∂ßåΩ≈ç√∫˜µ≤≥÷

*
artparent is offline  
#30 of 705 Old 12-03-2009, 07:29 AM
 
tiffani's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 3,772
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by widemouthedfrog View Post
I'm still relatively conflicted about international adoption (not that it is an option for us) but this is generally the conclusion I've come to.

I am so exhausted by dd's separation anxiety these days. I know that I need to start providing her with good tools to manage her anxiety and sadness, but all I want to do is give her a big hug.
I'm conflicted about it too -- it's really a case by case basis thing, and in our case, I think it's pretty cut and dried that it's an enormously wonderful thing for our kids. I *am* worried, however, about people abandoning children in the hopes that they will be adopted by westerners, but the rate of abandonment in uganda is staggering, and only a very tiny number of the kids get adopted. The level of poverty there is crushing.

In Ethiopia, I know of kids who were placed for adoption at 4 or 5 and told that they'll go to america to school and come back for visits, etc, when that it totally untrue, and the parents know it. really, really, really devastating for the kids, and while Ethiopia tries really hard to prevent that from happening, it does still happen. Most of the babies coming from Ethiopia have known, living birthfamilies, some of whom could raise their kids if adoption were not an option, many of whom could not. I didn't want to be faced with a child, fall in love, and then have to decide (often not until you've committed to adopting the child) whether or not I felt their placement was legitimate. there are also so many social factors that go into it in ethiopia -- single mothers have an almost impossible time there, leading to a lot of placements. We got lucky getting matched with kids whose stories are very starkly on the pro-adoption side, but when we were adopting Esther, and she had a father and siblings, it was incredibly agonizing, deciding how to feel about it all. I'm in touch with her father again, and his kids are living with his sister as he recently found work on a fishing boat... I still wonder if he didn't just change his mind -- good for him if he did, but I'd love to know the truth. I'm going to continue talking to him and see if I can get a sense of what happened. He hasn't talked about her at all, which I find odd, since I have asked, but I don't know the culture all that well, so I don't want to push it. I would love to hear that the whole thing was a scam, and she's doing well, but that might be wishful thinking...

anyway, since most people in Uganda don't even know that foreigners can adopt, I think it's still safe to adopt from there without worrying that your child should be with their family. Most of the kids being adopted don't have any family at all, or no known family anyway, and would live their lives in institutions, until they hit 12 or 14, when they're on their own. there is a wonderful blog about a woman in her early 20's who is living there -- she's adopted LOTS of kids already, and is constantly finding dying children, nursing them back to health, and finding homes for some of them, or helping their families, if they have families. It's REALLY heavy on the religion, but she is incredibly inspiring, and there is no doubt that she is saving lives. Only read it if you have a box of tissues handy.

We're Tiffani , Mark , Lucy (9/99) , Dexter (8/01) ,and Zachary Marvin (3/07) and Naomi Rose (6/09), home 11/10, by way of Ugandan adoption.

tiffani is offline  
Reply

User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off