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#721 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 02:16 PM
 
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Hm. Is it possible for 5HTP to just stop working altogether? This morning, I was doing fine, was walking out the door to Lily's school after dropping her off, Ruby was still in her blanket sleepers so she was riding on my shoulders. I thought someone was holding the door for me, (I know she saw me,) so I sped up to get through the door. Just as I got close, the person let go of the door and it came back and hit me in the face.

I cried all the way home. The door didn't hurt me, but I don't know. I took it REALLY personally.

Ugh. I just want to hide today.
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#722 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 02:32 PM
 
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: : :
i just got the BEST response to my CL ad looking for housemates!!!!
seriously, they couldnt be more awesome sounding
yay!!!!!!!

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#723 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 02:35 PM
 
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Hm. Is it possible for 5HTP to just stop working altogether? This morning, I was doing fine, was walking out the door to Lily's school after dropping her off, Ruby was still in her blanket sleepers so she was riding on my shoulders. I thought someone was holding the door for me, (I know she saw me,) so I sped up to get through the door. Just as I got close, the person let go of the door and it came back and hit me in the face.

I cried all the way home. The door didn't hurt me, but I don't know. I took it REALLY personally.

Ugh. I just want to hide today.
Hedy what an insensitive thing for her to do i am so sorry.
how much 5htp are you taking?
i take 150 mg in the am. then 100 mg in the early evening/late afternoon. i cant take them at night or i cant sleep at all. if i miss a dose, or take it late i notice it for sure. are you taking tablets or sublingual?

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#724 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 02:42 PM
 
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Capsules. 2 at night. 200 MG each.
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#725 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 02:58 PM
 
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wow 200mg should be doing something. does it make you sleepy?
it seems to do one of two things for people, either help them sleep deeply, or it wires them and keeps them up.
maybe change to taking them during the waking hours? or split them, one at night, one in the am?

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#726 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:07 PM
 
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I seem to go to sleep easily enough. Ruby does wake me up a lot in the night still though. Todd thinks it could be that I just need more sleep, that I'm acting really tired. Although... now that I'm off coffee, maybe it is affecting me today? I don't know. My mom said not to go cold turkey with the coffee, and I have a tendency to drink the stuff at home, from AJ Java.

If I'm out, I might try and be good and drink decaf. It's never really been consistent as to whether I would drink decaf or regular. Just depends on the day. Something is amiss though. Maybe it's still hormonal? I'll know if I get my period this weekend, because it will be early again. Ugh. I never thought my system would go so haywire after having kids. I feel like I'm always alternating between feeling like I'm going to drop dead, feeling really good, or feeling like I want to hide under my bed. There is no pattern to it, or I might think it's actually bipolar disorder. But I can go from being really happy to feeling like I'm losing my mind in a matter of 10 minutes sometimes, so I know these are just really really bad mood swings that I need to figure out how to control better.

Anyway, I hope I'm not upsetting anyone with this right now.
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#727 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:19 PM
 
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Hm. Is it possible for 5HTP to just stop working altogether? This morning, I was doing fine, was walking out the door to Lily's school after dropping her off, Ruby was still in her blanket sleepers so she was riding on my shoulders. I thought someone was holding the door for me, (I know she saw me,) so I sped up to get through the door. Just as I got close, the person let go of the door and it came back and hit me in the face.

I cried all the way home. The door didn't hurt me, but I don't know. I took it REALLY personally.

Ugh. I just want to hide today.
s Hedy. I am sorry that happened. It may just be the woman thought you were further back and didn't want to stand there and hold the door. I do that sometimes. I hesitate.. do I hold the door or not? I don't want to stand here forever. However had I let go of the door and it hit someone I would defiantly be there apologizing.

I wouldn't take it so personally.. if it was a stranger.
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#728 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:23 PM
 
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could be bipolar. rapid cycling can leave you going up and down often. my uncle is a really rapid cycler. my cycles arent usually so rapid, but my mood swings are horrible.

treehugger.gif )O( unschooling, witchy mum to Addy(7) and Niamh(4)
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#729 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:25 PM
 
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s Hedy. I am sorry that happened. It may just be the woman thought you were further back and didn't want to stand there and hold the door. I do that sometimes. I hesitate.. do I hold the door or not? I don't want to stand here forever. However had I let go of the door and it hit someone I would defiantly be there apologizing.

I wouldn't take it so personally.. if it was a stranger.

Yeah, I know she didn't do it on purpose. It just felt more like the universe didn't have my back this morning, or something.
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#730 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:27 PM
 
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Hedy, I'd bet on the no-coffee. You may be the type of person who is just extremely affected by quitting coffee. DH is the same way with coffee and cigarettes. Whenever he tries to quit, it's a total nightmare. We're talking Jekyl and Hyde. When he gives in and has the coffee or the cigarette, the world is OK again.
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#731 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:28 PM
 
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Does anyone know how to do word count in MS Word?
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#732 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:29 PM
 
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Does anyone know how to do word count in MS Word?
Nevermind. Figured it out.
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#733 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:30 PM
 
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Good thing we don't have a posting limit here. I'd have to edit the same post all day long.
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#734 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:32 PM
 
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I often still do that. LOL Now that it instantly shows up that I've had to edit something, which can be annoying, because sometimes it's just to remove a smilie's colon, (OW!)

Anyway, sometimes it does show up in the same minute the original was posted.
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#735 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:45 PM
 
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I seem to go to sleep easily enough. Ruby does wake me up a lot in the night still though. Todd thinks it could be that I just need more sleep, that I'm acting really tired. Although... now that I'm off coffee, maybe it is affecting me today? I don't know. My mom said not to go cold turkey with the coffee, and I have a tendency to drink the stuff at home, from AJ Java.

If I'm out, I might try and be good and drink decaf. It's never really been consistent as to whether I would drink decaf or regular. Just depends on the day. Something is amiss though. Maybe it's still hormonal? I'll know if I get my period this weekend, because it will be early again. Ugh. I never thought my system would go so haywire after having kids. I feel like I'm always alternating between feeling like I'm going to drop dead, feeling really good, or feeling like I want to hide under my bed. There is no pattern to it, or I might think it's actually bipolar disorder. But I can go from being really happy to feeling like I'm losing my mind in a matter of 10 minutes sometimes, so I know these are just really really bad mood swings that I need to figure out how to control better.

Anyway, I hope I'm not upsetting anyone with this right now.
Hedy - You are feeling your emotions so strongly right now. It can be exhausting and hard and scary. I know this has been said before but I would really look into finding someone to talk to. There are alot of really low cost counseling options if that is an issue. I am just wondering if it would be more helpful to just get some of your feelings out in general to someone who is a good, dedicated listener rather than trying to diagnose yourself which can be scary.
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#736 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:45 PM
 
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OW, indeed.
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#737 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:49 PM
 
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Good thing we don't have a posting limit here. I'd have to edit the same post all day long.
Isn't that annoying? And what is more annoying is for some reason for me, my posts in N&CE count towards Politics. So if make three posts in N&CE I can't post in Politics for an hour. : They keep saying that have tweaked my settings.. but it's not working.
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#738 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 03:52 PM
 
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Hedy - You are feeling your emotions so strongly right now. It can be exhausting and hard and scary. I know this has been said before but I would really look into finding someone to talk to. There are alot of really low cost counseling options if that is an issue. I am just wondering if it would be more helpful to just get some of your feelings out in general to someone who is a good, dedicated listener rather than trying to diagnose yourself which can be scary.
Yeah, I'm working on it. I haven't had much time to talk to Todd about it, because he has an insanely demanding project at work. I tend to only ask for things that cost money when he's in a good mood, because he gets pretty upset if I pick the wrong time. I know... I know... it's not the "wrong" time for me to ask for this, but counseling is just expensive, so I have to be careful there.
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#739 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 04:03 PM
 
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Yeah, I'm working on it. I haven't had much time to talk to Todd about it, because he has an insanely demanding project at work. I tend to only ask for things that cost money when he's in a good mood, because he gets pretty upset if I pick the wrong time. I know... I know... it's not the "wrong" time for me to ask for this, but counseling is just expensive, so I have to be careful there.
But it doesn't have to be expensive - There is a place downtown where it is like $5 a session. There is another place where is is $25 dollars a session. Think of something that you buy each week or twice a month that is kind of an extravagance - and then cut it out so you can have counseling. I would be willing to watch the kiddos while you went for an hour or so once a week if that's an issue. You could drop them over here and then Todd wouldn't even have to be in the equation. Put yourself first in this situation.
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#740 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 04:15 PM
 
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I guess what I was trying to say is that when you think about getting counseling, you don't necessarily need psychoanalysis, which would be on the more expensive side. You may just need an empathetic and perceptive listener which you can find in an MSW or something similiar. I think it is more about clicking with the right person rather than finding the person with the most qualifications. you know? If you found out that you had a more serious psychiatric condition, then maybe you might want a specialist for that condition but for now, maybe it's more important to just get things moving, you know? Just my two cents.
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#741 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 04:33 PM
 
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candice - i hope your card lady shows up. flakiness is SO aggravating!

sav - you might have found shoes but i have some blue see kai run booties that might be that size. they were isaac's but they are too small for ebin. i've had them on him a few times because they're so cute but his toes are totally at the ends : they are worn but adorable and you're welcome to them. i don't know exactly what size they are because they say 12 or 14 on the bottom i think and i'm sure see kai run changed their sizing since then. ebin is wearing a 7 right now.

hedy - i am the anxiety queen myself. i'm totally in denial about drinking coffee. i do it and then get all wiggy. decaf still has an amount of caffeine that i can feel. it has 15-20 mgs i think. it is only decaffinated to 3-5%. what a rough day, mama!

i hope the roomies work out tiff!


watching and listening about the spouse stuff. we've gone through some wierd dynamics in the past 4 years of being parents with both of us working full-time. and then me being at home most of the time. the expectations for laundry etc irk me sometimes but i try to see myself in his shoes. i *am* at home a lot but it is also a lot of work just being at home with 2 boys. getting clothes from the upstairs down to the basement and then back upstairs again is harder than one would think. (see my blog about ebin carrying steak knives down the stairs while i was folding laundry down there) sooo anyway. i'm going to be working 4 days a week again and i informed doug he is going to have to pick up some slack on laundry and dishes my housewifey days are just about over.
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#742 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 04:47 PM
 
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Hedy- do you not have insurance? that definitely makes finding the right "therapist" more challenging, but there are for sure sliding scale counselors around.

also have you had your thyroid levels checked lately?
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#743 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 04:54 PM
 
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i have to say that my panacea for anxiety is having a xanax prescription. i don't even have to take them...just having them in the medicine cabinet makes me feel better. i know i have the option if i start having a super freakout day. strangely i don't seem to have super freakouts now that i have them. (except in the grocery store. grocery stores make me hyperventilate and i have no idea why.)
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I have them when I am stepping onto the bus. While I'm waiting for it to come, I'm fine, and once I'm on I'm fine too. It's just the getting on part that freaks me out.
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#745 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 05:36 PM
 
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mine is sitting behind the wheel of a car and turning it on. i can be behind the wheel, so long as the car isnt running. and i can turn it on from the passengers side. but that act of being in the drivers seat, and the car being on.. sets off panic attacks.

treehugger.gif )O( unschooling, witchy mum to Addy(7) and Niamh(4)
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#746 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 05:39 PM
 
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I have them in hospitals. Which was really embarrassing when Joey's mom took us to meet all her coworkers at a hospital. I used to get anxiety attacks on airplanes too, until I discovered booze.
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#747 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 05:45 PM
 
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yes. airplanes do it for me too.
the one time i was unable to booze it up for a flight that i can remember having panicy feelings for was when Addy was 4 months old. i had to take care of her, while DH had HIS panic attack, then had a few drinks to calm down. yeah that flight sucked

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#748 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 05:53 PM
 
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Hey there,

I usually just lurk around here but I just found out about a great event and thought that some of you would love to go. The Waldorf school in Hillsboro (Swallowtail School) is hosting a harvest faire this weekend from 1-5 on Saturday. It's only $5 per car to get in and there will be tons of fun stuff for kids. They are having a puppet show and a bunch of craft and activity booths that are free. But it also has a neat environmental theme. You can check out their slide show and poster.

http://www.matsor.com/misc/harvestfair3

The first picture in the slide show has the address and additional information but in case you can't view it, the address is 13620 NW Camp Ireland Rd, Hillsboro, which is just off Glencoe Rd south of Evergreen. It should be a ton of fun.
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#749 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 06:15 PM
 
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oh definitely airplanes but only when it is super turbulent. i get the clammiest hands and pits. but i hate drinking on planes most of the time because of the dehydration factor.

my other WORST thing is driving over big bridges like the 405. sweaty hands. white knuckles. that's a totally recent development for me. i just read an article on cnn.com about people that have the bridge phobia. it actually made me laugh. it talked about people that FREAK out at tollbooths and have to pay someone to drive them over the bridge. like this is so common there are actually employees that do this for people. or one guy had to ride in the trunk. i wasn't feeling QUITE so neurotic after that. i can actually drive over bridges. i just feel crazy while i'm doing it.

i used to have the hospital thing but it seems to have passed
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#750 of 1618 Old 10-16-2008, 06:38 PM
 
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Yeah, I'm working on it. I haven't had much time to talk to Todd about it, because he has an insanely demanding project at work. I tend to only ask for things that cost money when he's in a good mood, because he gets pretty upset if I pick the wrong time. I know... I know... it's not the "wrong" time for me to ask for this, but counseling is just expensive, so I have to be careful there.
Hedy.. just wondering.. why do you have to "ask" to spend money? I consult DH if it is more than $100 or so. I tell him when I go to buy clothes for the kids. (he knows that will be between 100 and 200.) I don't think I would ask him if I could go to a councilor though. If I felt that is what I needed to do, I would do it.

http://www.sciam.com/article.cfm?id=...tical-leanings

According to this.. DH must be a "lefty"
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