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Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason
Rating Distribution 3 Review(s)
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          33%
            33%
              3 Review(s)
              Reviews
                02-08-2011, 10:11 AM by t2009
                

                This has been the most important parenting book I have read so far. It has totally helped me to refocus my approach to parenting my now-toddler. Kohn has a great sense of humor and a wonderful style that will challenge the way you parent without making you feel bad about your earlier practices.

                 

                The first half of the book was a little long-winded for my taste, but is full of interesting and necessary background. The latter part of the book sets up a loose framework for how to...

                  06-01-2011, 01:43 PM by Kathy White
                  

                  Alfie Cohen is an amazing author and activist.  His book is thought provoking and challenging the normal ways of how we think as parents.  

                   

                  I read this and realised a lot of my parenting has been about manipulation and control. I am deeply interested in spirituality and meditation and a goal if you will about parenting is for me to say I love my children unconditionally.

                   

                  It was a bit of an eye opener to see how I don't really do this.  How I am actually t...

                    06-02-2011, 11:09 AM by osker
                    

                    I couldn't disagree more. I believe it is the job of a parent to teach our children and Alfie Kohn's complete lack of input toward his children feels to me like disinterest and neglect. To me, a parent who helps their child, encourages their child, and engages their child while sharing themselves and their views is the parent who is loving their child and allowing them the safe space in which to grow. If your child jumps on the bed and you say "boing boing" you child is going to become bored...

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                    Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason

                    Description: Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need -- and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that question are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them. One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send. More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting -- including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.

                    Details:

                    Detail Value
                    Author Alfie Kohn
                    Binding Paperback
                    Dewey Decimal Number 649.1
                    EAN 9780743487481
                    Edition 1st Atria Books Trade Pbk. Ed
                    Feature Notes: BUY WITH CONFIDENCE, Over one million books sold! 98% Positive feedback. Compare our books, prices and service to the competition. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed
                    ISBN 0743487486
                    Label Atria
                    Languages English
                    List Price $15.00
                    Manufacturer Atria
                    Number Of Items 1
                    Number Of Pages 272
                    Product Group Book
                    Product Type Name ABIS_BOOK
                    Publication Date 2006-03-28
                    Publisher Atria
                    Studio Atria
                    Title Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason
                    Height 8.6 inches
                    Length 5.2 inches
                    Width 0.8 inches