|Topic Review (Newest First)|
|07-16-2010 05:57 AM|
|MCatLvrMom2A&X||I get my alone time at night when I take my bath and read. Sometimes I spend all night in there.|
|07-16-2010 05:19 AM|
My DH has been working out of town lately, so any time to myself is rare. It's the kids and just me 24/7 until he gets home.
He's home this weekend, so I'm meeting a girlfriend for a movie and shopping.
Otherwise, it's time on the computer, reading, writing on my blogs, watching TV (evenings), go for a walk on my own when DH can watch them (love it!)...I'm also learning to knit but I suck at it...oh well...
|07-14-2010 08:53 PM|
It usually involves wine. Either the tasting of or shopping for.
And I third the sentiment about grocery shopping solo. I consider that more of a luxury than a massage.
|07-13-2010 04:27 PM|
I was thinking of this thread the other day because I did have some time to myself (my MIL took the kids out for the afternoon). I got a juicy gourmet burger from a local restaurant, watched a DVRed episode of The Soup, worked on some sewing projects, played the Nintendo DS, and took a nap. It was all kinds of awesome.
But having time to yourself at home is different than having time to yourself outside the house, which is the perspective my earlier post was coming from. I loved hanging out at home by myself!!!
|07-13-2010 03:31 PM|
I mow. I put on my ear plugs and just mow. No one can come near me, lol. I watch for one of the older kids on one of our 5 porches giving me the emergency sign if the lo is freaking out or something. That doesn't usually happen, though, so I just mow. If it's winter I rake the barn or something. Or read, or browse recipes, get on MDC, gab on the phone w/a girlfriend, or even take a nap sometimes.
Speaking of mowing, now that I'm cooled down I'll go start on the front (we live in the country, so it takes awhile, and I'm way behind so it's taking way longer).
|07-13-2010 02:07 PM|
|07-13-2010 01:13 PM|
|07-06-2010 12:57 AM|
Well what I usually do is read books. Or I go to the gym for some me time and if I'm on the bike or treadmill I read there too! But when I have lots of time I like to get my hair done. But last time I did that it was awful. I was stressed about the baby and my hair suffered for it.
So I just stick to books and exercise, I always feel so much better about everything. I do hear you though about floundering when you actually have a minute. There are so many things I would love to do sans kids, but it all flies out my head when I get the go ahead- which rarely happens anyway.
Is it sad that I really love going to the grocery store without kids. I rather do that than get a pedicure- I suck LOL
|07-06-2010 12:04 AM|
If I'm home with some time to myself, I either play some music or read. Sometimes I clean, but I usually try to devote any me time to something fun- I only clean if the house is so messy I couldn't enjoy the me time without cleaning first When I'm out and about on my own it's usually to run errands, but I do go to a Mom's Night Out once a month. It felt really wierd at first to out at night by myself, I almost felt like I was sneaking out or something! It gets easier, though, and now I don't think I could maintain my sanity without those mom's nights!
|07-05-2010 11:49 PM|
If I'm at home, I sleep or take a bath!
I might have an hour when DH can watch the baby so I might run to a store without her. I haven't had any excursions yet that aren't immediate-need-based. At the end of this month I plan on going to a yoga class by myself (my studio has a great end-of-month class I haven't attended since early in my pregnancy). We can work out our schedules so this will happen. I just hope I feel like I can do it...and not decide to nap instead!
|07-05-2010 08:44 PM|
|07-04-2010 06:15 PM|
|jwpsgurl||I don't get much time to myself, but last week when DH was off I went to see Eclipse and ran some errands, today he is off and I locked myself in our room and took a much needed nap. Sometimes just running out for 30 minutes is enough of a refresher for me. I am lucky to have an understanding DH who knows that being with a 2 yr old and 3 yr old 24/7 is not easy!|
|07-04-2010 06:08 PM|
|tayndrewsmama||Ah.......alone time? Ha ha. Never lately. And I mean....never. Unless taking a shower with the baby seated in the bathroom and not the actual tub means alone.......|
|07-02-2010 02:40 AM|
Depends on how much time/money I have. If I have just an hour or so I will usually read, play on the computer, or nap. More time I will go out with a friend, go to the library or bookstore, roam a store,run errands, or get a coffee and take a drive.
I let go of the guilt a long time ago but it was hard. I finally just accepted that to be functioning adult I had to have some time away from my family to just be Sara. Like Limabean we do family time, couple time, alone time, etc and we are all mentally healthier for it. But it does take "practice" to know what to do after being with my kids/family with out a break.
|07-01-2010 12:56 PM|
|*bejeweled*||sleep, read, sleep, read.|
|06-30-2010 11:56 PM|
Yoga, cook/bake, bathe, pilates, kempo, TV (baseball & World Cup right now)
And read various books about different parent topics. Food and herbs are my favorite!
|06-30-2010 09:48 PM|
Oh luxurious free time! Love it.
I'm a huuuge reader. So reading is a big one for me. Trip to the book store, surfing the internet, watching a movie, enjoying a nice beverage in peace (doesn't matter what..milkshake, coffee, wine, smoothie...Just being able to drink it in peace is perfection.), Mothering.com , Video games, sit outside and knit/read/daydream.
If I'm feeling social I really enjoy going out to eat with 2 of my girlfriends. We usually just go to IHOP or somewhere as equally casual but that time is precious to me.
Lately I've been considering going to see a movie but I just can't seem to justify the cost. Tickets are expensive now!!
I know what it's like to forget how to be an adult. I remember when 2 close friends came over to visit and my friend H asked me, "So how have you been doing?" and I answered her by talking about the pregnancy, my DS, husband and then more about the kids. She smiled and then said, "But really, YOU how are YOU doing?" I kind of sat there baffled for a second not even knowing how to answer the question.
It made me realize how easy it is to forget to take that extra bit of time to devote to just being me and investing in my own interests.
I've been very lucky to have a few close friends and my DH to remind and encourage me to just "do anything or even nothing" when I get free time. I used to feel like I was wasting time or not being a "good wife" or "good mom". I've come to see that taking the time for myself makes me more peaceful and a much better mother and wife. It also gives me confidence and makes me feel good about myself. I think my DS and husband pick up on that and it makes for a happier home.
|06-30-2010 09:29 PM|
|06-30-2010 02:47 PM|
I totally agree with all those suggestions to let go of the guilt! My daughters are 6 & 4 and I still sometimes feel guilty and anxious leaving, but I've noticed that my alone time AND our together time is SO much better when I relax and enjoy myself. They know they are loved and adored and that I'll be back soon.
As far as what I do with the loads of alone time I have? I mostly bead, get online, read or meditate. If I'm out somewhere alone it's usually the grocery store! But I usually bring good music or a podcast to listen to on the way there, and I have occasionally brought a book and chilled in the parking lot for a few minutes prior to going in. I have recently started going hiking and just wandering around looking for photo ops. It's so, so important to remember that while being a mama is amazing, and the center of most of our lives, we need to nourish the other parts of us too
|06-30-2010 12:43 AM|
Go to knit night with the local Ravelry group.
Go to the bookstore, library, or for coffee.
I'd like to go get a pedicure someday, but I never seem to deem it worthy enough for my free time!
|06-29-2010 07:48 PM|
I totally get the not knowing what to do with yourself thing. I often feel lost on the rare occasion I go out without dd. It's not a guilt thing it's more that because I'm so used to having her with me that I sort of don't remember how to be my own adult person. It's gotten better as time goes by but still there are times that I'll insist I need me time, go out for an hour to shop or have a coffee and spend the whole time kind of scattered. I don't know if that makes any sense .. it's hard to explain.
Anyway, I do like to read and relax and do nothing for alone time. It's nice to just have some quiet and uninterrupted time to sit with my own thoughts now and again.
|06-28-2010 11:43 PM|
Today I had time to look through some patterns I already had, pick out a dress, read the pattern, cut it out entirely, and get as far as sewing most of it with the exception of the interfacing around the neck and arms. I also need to hem it. These are naptime activities, but cutting out a dress is not possible really in spurts--it requires a large chunk of time for me since I'm so slow!
I have zero mommy guilt. It was running me ragged and then I realized that I was being held a prisoner by my own brain, so I pushed it out and haven't looked back since. I also put my little one in a MMO during the school year, and she LOVES it. I found it after I booted the mommy guilt out since I had a quasi-meltdown.
Sometimes I will go to the gym and just sit in the steamroom and do nothing. I won't even work out--just go sit in a too-small towel and pretend I am in a sweatlodge in the mountains.
|06-28-2010 06:28 PM|
I totally understand this dilemma. I have just begun to feel comfortable leaving my kids...today they are both in a day camp for 4 hours which is a first. They are 4 and 7. So I have 4 hours a day every day this week which is a total luxury and unheard of in my life. My anxiety comes in the form of not wanting to waste the time and being unsure of how to spend it. I start to feel pressured about all the many things to do in addition to the things I want to do. I think I'm going to try to split this time into household stuff, gardening and then also sitting outside and reading or knitting.
It's a really hard balance, for sure.
|06-28-2010 02:07 AM|
|bluebirdiemama||Just want to add---I totally get the anxiety thing. Not so much about leaving the kids (well, not when they're with daddy), but just anxiety from being a person that hangs out with little kids all day, every day. I feel stressed about going into the world sometimes, and feel really out of place. For me, it took a couple months, but after I made it a priority to get out once in while that stress really diminished|
|06-28-2010 02:04 AM|
Time to myself is really important. I have gone a long time without any, and now I'm feeling burnt out and making it a priority.
I like to read, take a bath, stretch, daydream, knit, hang out on the computer, take a walk with a friend, get some coffee, go to the craft store.
I've found that it doesn't even have to be a really long time. It can be just an hour at the grocery store without the kids, and I come home feeling refreshed.
|06-28-2010 01:52 AM|
Read, take a nap, log on to Mothering.com, or take a bath.
If I have a chance to get out of the house I'll either meet a friend for tea, go to yoga, or take the dogs for a walk.
|06-25-2010 03:54 PM|
I usually spend it cleaning
If I had more alone time....I would scrapbook, watch movies, go out for coffee with friends....maybe someday!
|06-25-2010 03:47 PM|
Depending how much time I have. Also, I dont feel guily about me time I take since it helps with burn out and makes me a better parent having some time to me.
When dd1 started school FT, one day a week I put my 18 mo old in a Parents Day out program one day a week. It was 10-2pm and she came home and napped. She loved it, still attends now as well as 3 day preschool.
On PDO days, I sometimes come home and just clean clean clean and get it done in 1/3 the time than if the kids were here, meet w my personal trainer, or workout, run errands and enjoy without children! go out to lunch w DH near his work, watch tv shoes on dvr I have been wanting to watch, make calls to insurance or calls that need time that tots or young children make impossible to do, go to the library, read and have a coffee, visit with a friend who also has a child in PDO.
Pick and choose what you like to do and go from there.
|06-25-2010 03:25 PM|
Alone time is really important for me to maintain sanity
I read, write, or just lay in bed and daydream which is a luxury.
|06-25-2010 01:26 PM|
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