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  Topic Review (Newest First)
07-01-2008 11:07 PM
becoming My mom is super sweet and understanding and doesn't say/do many questionable things, but she did once tell me that she thought only "hippies" breastfed.
07-01-2008 09:24 PM
RebeccaJA My mom passed away recently, but I get plenty of outrageous comments from my dad about my 4 m. old daughter:

"She doesn't know how to play with her toys. Why does she put everything in her mouth?"

"Have you been putting her down yet? If you never put her down, she'll get spoiled and she'll want you to hold her forever."
That's our plan, dad, she's going to learn how to crawl and walk in my arms.

"If you put her down, you can get more stuff done."
Yeah, while she's crying her head off in a crib, I'm going to get a lot done.

"When are you going to put her to sleep on her own? If you don't start putting her in a crib now, she'll never learn to sleep on her own."
Yup- I'm sure we'll be sleeping with our teenage daughter.
07-01-2008 08:32 PM
bellymama i love my mom...so i don't think i will post things on the internet to make her sound bad.
07-01-2008 06:26 PM
jillmamma Mom: Don't you think you ought to put him down sometimes? (about my then newborn DS) He might want to be held all the time then!
(now at 5.5 I am lucky if he does not wipe off my kisses, LOL!)

MIL: Shouldn't you turn her carseat around right away at 12 months? She might break her legs!
(DD was 16.5 lb at 12 months, and is still RF now at 34 months and 22 lb, much safer!)

MIL: (this is afer a year) They really NEED whole cow's milk, you know. How will they ever get enough calcium?
(Both of mine have nursed WELL beyond a year, and neither likes cow's milk, allthough DD will drink some if you put chocolate syrup in it as a treat.)

This also makes me wonder...what kind of things will I be telling my kids to do or not do when I become a grandma? I hope I can keep my mouth shut and let things go unless it is threatening life or health. It would be interesting to see what they would say in a thread like this in 20 or 30 years.
07-01-2008 06:08 PM
veganone My mom has tried really hard to be supportive of our parenting choices, even though they are pretty different from hers.

But, after complaining to her at length about my MIL (that's another thread, right?) being on me to give DD more solids AND formula endlessly on a recent visit (dd was 7.5 months, and had been on limited solids for about two weeks). My mom asked me "well what's she getting for protein?"



"Um, breastmilk."

My mom has been obsessed with protein since I stopped eating meat almost 20 years ago. I'm still fine, mom!
07-01-2008 03:55 PM
flyabuv I am TTC#1 and didn't have anything to add until yesterday. I told my friend/coworker that I wanted to have a natural birth and she seriously got mad at me! She of course said I would change my mind during and asked why I would even want to. I said that is what my body was made to do and it is natural, she said, "God made man, and man made epidural so that woman wouldn't have to go through that much pain!"

Wow! Remind me not to tell her that I am going to BF, delayed vax, cloth diaper, and leave any son of mine intact. She will go ape-sh*t

After talking about it with my future DH he said he thinks people get angry because just by choosing a different method some get defensive that you are judging them for their choice.
07-01-2008 12:37 AM
Honey693 I'm due in November, but I've already gotten a few from my MIL. I love her to death, but sometimes . We were talking about how much my nephew eats (he's 2) and she said he was just like his dad (my BIL) who ate a ton when he was little. She told me they started him on rice cereal at 4 WEEKS b/c formula just wasn't filling him up. Keep in mind, this kid was also on scheduled feeding times and not fed on demand *bangs head* I could not believe my ears when I heard that. It took me 20 minutes later that night to convince my husband that anything but breast milk that early is not a good idea.
07-01-2008 12:13 AM
TeaJunkie From when DS was about 2 mos old:

MIL: I still think that he would sleep better in his own room.
DH: No he wouldn't. (I love DH)
MIL: Well at least you guys would sleep better.

Hmmm...I was under the impression that being a parent is doing what's best for the baby, not doing whatever I can to keep my pre-baby life!
06-30-2008 11:33 AM
MsLondon
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kleine Hexe View Post
"A good whack on his bottom and he'll learn to go to sleep." Again DS was a few months old.
06-30-2008 04:32 AM
JustJamie My mom is really hung up on her opinion that I should give my 3 month old a bottle of water...I don't know why. She's needier than my older DD was, and gassier...

Me - "I think she's reacting to X, so I'm eliminating that from my diet for a few weeks."
Mom -"Oh, give her a bottle of water! The doctor told me to do that with you and your brother..."
Me - "well, mom, it's recommended that they receive ONLY breastmilk for the first 6 months."
Mom - "Well, water won't hurt anything..."
Me - "Except that it has no nutritional value, and will fill her up without giving her any calories."
Mom - "Well you don't have to give her a lot, just a couple ounces before you nurse her."
Me - 'You remember that Aunt D would drink 8 ounces of water before every meal to help her lose weight?"
Mom - "Yeah..."
Me - "D'you think that maybe giving my baby a couple ounces of water before each meal would have the same impact and maybe it's not a good idea?"
06-30-2008 04:09 AM
sunyata My mom started giving me whole (cow's) milk when I was either two weeks or two months old. I don't remember exactly what she said, but either way .

Fortunately, both sets of grandparents go along with our wishes and don't verbally disagree with our decisions, for the most part. Other extended family members aren't as tactful/open-minded, though.
06-30-2008 01:05 AM
barefootpoetry
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarah&dina View Post

FIL: "By the way, I defrosted the bottles you had in the freezer."
Me: "Huh? You mean the 2-3 you used today?"
FIL: "No, all of them."
Me: Speechless, hoping I didn't understand correctly.
FIL: "I know you've been so busy lately and I thought that in the middle of the night you might be too tired to nurse and that it would be easier to just heat up a bottle instead. So they're all defrosted, just waiting for you to use in the fridge. Also, while I was at the store I picked up some formula since I know you have a hard time pumping enough."
Me: Ready to stretch my hands through the phone and ring his neck.
FIL: "We didn't use it today, but if you use all the bottles I defrosted this week, then we'll probably have to use the formula next week if you can't pump enough."

OMG, I don't know whether to cry or go on a rampage just reading that! I can only imagine how YOU must have felt!
06-30-2008 12:45 AM
ishereal
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy2abigail View Post
-She's ready for food! Look! She's reaching for my apple! (at just barely 4 months)
That's a good one. Duh! They reach for everything
06-29-2008 09:21 PM
Tizzy There are a variety of funny comments but the best was when my mom was holding my DS1 when he was about 12hrs old and started poking at his soft spot on his head! Saying "Look! here's his soft spot! It's really big!"
I actually had to tell her to stop poking my son...
06-29-2008 09:00 PM
*Erin* "breastfeeding is gross, and i never wanted to do it at all. think about it-the baby is a little PERSON at 6 months, that's just, well, sexual." wrinkles her nose.

oy.
(now, thankfully, she is happy to tell anyone who will listen of her EBF gs who bfs on demand and who is super healthy and happy. she brags that i nursed my dd until she was 4.5 too. )
06-27-2008 07:52 PM
rightkindofme
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liquesce View Post
Every single time my in-laws are going to see my son I make sure he's fully dressed. The last time they saw him in just a diaper they asked me about a thousand times why he was undressed ... "why is he wearing no clothes?" "It's hot." "Okay." (five minutes) "But where are his clothes? He's ok?" "The weather ... it's hot." "Okay." (five minutes more ...) "But why he's naked?" :
Heh. I have knee jerk reactions towards wanting to dress my five week old. I tend to be more comfortable in some clothing, but she shrieks if we dress her and she screams constantly if she is too hot. Apparently she is happier naked. When we are leaving the house my instinct is to put clothes on her even though she doesn't like it much. My husband pointed out that it wasn't necessary and would make her unhappy. He had to stare at me for a while as I went through my "but she needs clothes!!" rambling. Eventually I realized I was being dumb.
06-27-2008 06:16 PM
westcoastma lol.... glad (in a sort of sadistic sounding way I guess) that others chimed in on this, at least I know I'm not the only one with silly parents.

Omg, about the milk stash being defrosted; I would have FREAKED! Aw, poor you. I totally understand the "pumping till it hurts". hugs.

I used to get the "he's crying because he's hungry" thing a lot too when ds was younger. Usually from my ex. I'd feed, and feed him, and then it seemed like he'd cry because I kept feeding him and he wasn't hungry!! I was a new parent and bfing totally new too, so I bought into it. But common sense prevailed and I knew he wasn't crying because he was hungry after a while.
06-27-2008 03:38 PM
Liquesce
Quote:
Originally Posted by westcoastma View Post
5. Little thing, but it bugs me. It seems like she can't stand seeing ds naked (with a diaper) for any amount of time. It can be 25 degrees C outside and him chilling without clothes on freaks her out! "Where are his clothes? He's going to get chilly!" Meanwhile everyone is sweating...
Every single time my in-laws are going to see my son I make sure he's fully dressed. The last time they saw him in just a diaper they asked me about a thousand times why he was undressed ... "why is he wearing no clothes?" "It's hot." "Okay." (five minutes) "But where are his clothes? He's ok?" "The weather ... it's hot." "Okay." (five minutes more ...) "But why he's naked?" :
06-27-2008 02:58 PM
rightkindofme My mom suggested to me casually while I was pregnant that I should get some rice cereal. I told her that seemed a bit premature because if I would give the baby some it wouldn't be for months and months. She said, "Well I started giving you solid food at two weeks. You slept through the night by three months old because of it. If you want sleep you need to give the baby real food."

oh my
06-27-2008 02:10 PM
Inspired007
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarah&dina View Post
OMG, these quotes are SO out of the mouths of my inlaws! (I'm glad I can laugh about it here because in the heat of the moment I just want to scream.) We have had the same EXACT conversations!

I apologize for the long post in advance, but I have to rant about this topic a little:

My FIL comes to my house to watch the baby 1 day/week while I'm out for 8 hours at work. I HATE pumping and it takes me about 3 days just to pump 6 oz. but I do it till it hurts just so the babe can have my milk to eat. One day I was so proud of myself, I realized I had accumulated about 15 bottles in the freezer. On my way home from work I call my FIL to ask how the babe is doing. We have a nice conversation and then he says:

FIL: "By the way, I defrosted the bottles you had in the freezer."
Me: "Huh? You mean the 2-3 you used today?"
FIL: "No, all of them."
Me: Speechless, hoping I didn't understand correctly.
FIL: "I know you've been so busy lately and I thought that in the middle of the night you might be too tired to nurse and that it would be easier to just heat up a bottle instead. So they're all defrosted, just waiting for you to use in the fridge. Also, while I was at the store I picked up some formula since I know you have a hard time pumping enough."
Me: Ready to stretch my hands through the phone and ring his neck.
FIL: "We didn't use it today, but if you use all the bottles I defrosted this week, then we'll probably have to use the formula next week if you can't pump enough."

Even now, with this story long over, I feel my blood begain to boil re-telling it! Thank G!d, we got rid of the formula that day and I was able to pump just enough for the next week and I've been slowly restoring my freezer supply.

To constrast that story, my dear Mother responded to hearing what my FIL did, saying (or more like freaking-out!): "He did WHAT?! Don't you dare give my grandaughter formula. NEVER. Go drink a glass of beer and get pumping for next week, maybe you can consider taking milk from another nursing mom, call LLL..." While my ILs are so NOT on the same page as I am, my dear parents are amazingly supportive.

Oh my God! I would have cried so hard. I know you probably did, poor thing! I cried when I thought our deep freezer had cut off and all of my milk stash had defrosted. Why on earth would he think that he needed to thaw all of it out? Why would he think you wouldn't do it if you needed it? Oh my. Do you think he did this on purpose? It seems so odd.

And what would make him think that you would just let him pick out formula anyway? I mean, if you ever did have to use it, it certainly wouldn't be a cavalier thing...I mean, tons of research would go into a decision like that I'd imagine.
06-27-2008 01:16 PM
yasinsmama I have gotten a few from my mom too!

For about a month now, she has been telling me to give DS cereal in a bottle mixed w/ breastmilk (he is only 9 weeks, and was only 5 weeks when she told me that). Everytime he cries, she says he's hungry & not getting enough milk. He DOES eat frequently, but the boy is not starving. He gained 1 pound in 1 week!!!

Just last night, I told her the LC said she thought DS was showing signs of teething. So this is how it went
Mom: Where is he
Me: With his daddy, he's really fussy. He may be teething
Mom: NO WAY, he's too young. He's just hungry
Me: Umm, I just fed him. He IS drooling a lot, biting his hands, gmming my nipples. I think it's possible.
Mom: Just give him a little cereal. It's good for his stomach. That's what the doc told me to do for your sister when she was baby (umm, she's 34)
Me; He really doesn't eed anything for the 1st 6 months except for bm.
Mom: Well, give him cereal, just don't give him baby food...yuck...it's full of all kinds of crap
Me: And cereal isnt?



And, when my baby is screaming his head off, the LAST thing I want to hear is "see, it's your fault, you've got him spoiled".

But I am really tired of being told that my baby is hungry.
06-27-2008 12:27 PM
abc123xyz Hmmm all the things I hear all the time...I get the ones about the cereal...About letting him cry in his crib...about spoiling him by picking him up when he is wailing because he has a need...

The best though:
1.) Them--If you let him sleep with you, you will never get him out of your bed.
Me--Well, as long as he can sleep by himself when he gets to college, I think we'll be fine!

2.) Them--You plan to breastfeed how long? He'll never walk if you don't give him some food.
Me--Wow...I was certain that breastmilk was the optimum food for the first year of life. (Mind you, my son has been pulling up on the couch since he was 7 months old--he's 8 months now and crawling and taking steps!)
3.) Them--Give him a chicken leg...that's what he wants..look, he's eyeing it on your plate.
Me--Except he eyes everything and we are raw fooders!!! No chicken here! If I gave it to him, he'd throw it on the floor.

People are so stupid sometimes! I can't even believe it! I get it all the time though...I am so use to it! I live in a real closeminded community. I have never seen anyone else breastfeeding since I lived here and I get looks like I have a second head. People don't homebirth, always vax, have not seen an un-circ penis, wouldn't think to cloth diaper, etc...you get the idea! Not granola at all! I don't get it! But I have learned to just accept it and go along with my days. I take all the stares and gawks...I take the rude comments and whispers and just hold my head high knowing that all that matters is what I do for my child and what he thinks...Surely, he thinks it's great that I nurse him wherever, whenever!
06-27-2008 12:24 PM
butterfly_mommy
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarah&dina View Post
OMG, these quotes are SO out of the mouths of my inlaws! (I'm glad I can laugh about it here because in the heat of the moment I just want to scream.) We have had the same EXACT conversations!

I apologize for the long post in advance, but I have to rant about this topic a little:

My FIL comes to my house to watch the baby 1 day/week while I'm out for 8 hours at work. I HATE pumping and it takes me about 3 days just to pump 6 oz. but I do it till it hurts just so the babe can have my milk to eat. One day I was so proud of myself, I realized I had accumulated about 15 bottles in the freezer. On my way home from work I call my FIL to ask how the babe is doing. We have a nice conversation and then he says:

FIL: "By the way, I defrosted the bottles you had in the freezer."
Me: "Huh? You mean the 2-3 you used today?"
FIL: "No, all of them."
Me: Speechless, hoping I didn't understand correctly.
FIL: "I know you've been so busy lately and I thought that in the middle of the night you might be too tired to nurse and that it would be easier to just heat up a bottle instead. So they're all defrosted, just waiting for you to use in the fridge. Also, while I was at the store I picked up some formula since I know you have a hard time pumping enough."
Me: Ready to stretch my hands through the phone and ring his neck.
FIL: "We didn't use it today, but if you use all the bottles I defrosted this week, then we'll probably have to use the formula next week if you can't pump enough."

Even now, with this story long over, I feel my blood begain to boil re-telling it! Thank G!d, we got rid of the formula that day and I was able to pump just enough for the next week and I've been slowly restoring my freezer supply.

To constrast that story, my dear Mother responded to hearing what my FIL did, saying (or more like freaking-out!): "He did WHAT?! Don't you dare give my grandaughter formula. NEVER. Go drink a glass of beer and get pumping for next week, maybe you can consider taking milk from another nursing mom, call LLL..." While my ILs are so NOT on the same page as I am, my dear parents are amazingly supportive.
reading this makes me tear up. You must have been devastated.
06-27-2008 11:50 AM
Larrysgirl Just put some honey on his soother to make him take it.

I'm like Um. That could kill him.
06-27-2008 11:14 AM
riverside knitter My mom keeps telling me to put "just a pinch" of rice cereal in dd's bottle so she'll sleep better. Dd is 3 months old, is breastfed and sleeps just fine thanks! Of course, we were babies in the 70s when formula was "better" and doctors suggested solids at 4 months. On the plus side, she did admit liking my BG diapers better than paper dipes.
06-27-2008 09:36 AM
babydanielsmom ok here's mine:

Most kids should be STTN by 6 weeks

All lo's "need" baby cereal ...I asked why ?...well it's just good for them.

letting ds cosleep will hurt our sex life
my response ...well mom it hasn't so far
06-27-2008 09:30 AM
sarah&dina OMG, these quotes are SO out of the mouths of my inlaws! (I'm glad I can laugh about it here because in the heat of the moment I just want to scream.) We have had the same EXACT conversations!

I apologize for the long post in advance, but I have to rant about this topic a little:

My FIL comes to my house to watch the baby 1 day/week while I'm out for 8 hours at work. I HATE pumping and it takes me about 3 days just to pump 6 oz. but I do it till it hurts just so the babe can have my milk to eat. One day I was so proud of myself, I realized I had accumulated about 15 bottles in the freezer. On my way home from work I call my FIL to ask how the babe is doing. We have a nice conversation and then he says:

FIL: "By the way, I defrosted the bottles you had in the freezer."
Me: "Huh? You mean the 2-3 you used today?"
FIL: "No, all of them."
Me: Speechless, hoping I didn't understand correctly.
FIL: "I know you've been so busy lately and I thought that in the middle of the night you might be too tired to nurse and that it would be easier to just heat up a bottle instead. So they're all defrosted, just waiting for you to use in the fridge. Also, while I was at the store I picked up some formula since I know you have a hard time pumping enough."
Me: Ready to stretch my hands through the phone and ring his neck.
FIL: "We didn't use it today, but if you use all the bottles I defrosted this week, then we'll probably have to use the formula next week if you can't pump enough."

Even now, with this story long over, I feel my blood begain to boil re-telling it! Thank G!d, we got rid of the formula that day and I was able to pump just enough for the next week and I've been slowly restoring my freezer supply.

To constrast that story, my dear Mother responded to hearing what my FIL did, saying (or more like freaking-out!): "He did WHAT?! Don't you dare give my grandaughter formula. NEVER. Go drink a glass of beer and get pumping for next week, maybe you can consider taking milk from another nursing mom, call LLL..." While my ILs are so NOT on the same page as I am, my dear parents are amazingly supportive.
06-27-2008 09:30 AM
Kleine Hexe From my mom:

"Honey, you will never go into labor on your own. I always had to be induced and so will you."

"Don't get your hopes up about breastfeeding. It won't work out."

From my dad:

"My goodness, a bit of honey here and there is not going to hurt him. I gave you honey all the time. You really loved to suck it off my finger."

"I'm not giving him food. He's just licking my ice cream cone." DS was 4 months old.

"A good whack on his bottom and he'll learn to go to sleep." Again DS was a few months old.
06-27-2008 08:54 AM
mommy2abigail LOL, those are funny! Mine are:

-She would sleep through the night if you put her in a crib, you know.

-She's ready for food! Look! She's reaching for my apple! (at just barely 4 months)
06-27-2008 02:21 AM
Nautical I am currently pregnant, so I haven't collected that many gems, but my favorites have been:

*If you're going to breastfeed, just make sure you give the baby occasional bottles of water so it doesn't dehydrate.

*Be careful if you don't circ your son. The foreskin fuses to the head of the penis with most babies and will need to be operated on.

*If you want the baby in your bed, fine. Just make sure you take it out by four months because that's when you can start rolling over on to it.
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