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09-14-2008 09:05 PM
indigoscot wow smartycat, glad you are ok!!! car accidents are scary.

we are thinking about a larger vehicle once dp is pregnant with #2, and if we end up with multiples it will be a necessity. the company i work for has employee discount deals with basically all the major dealers, so that coupled with trade-in and tax refund should make it less painful. my car is paid for with low mileage, dp's only has a couple of years to go before it's paid for too. if anyone has suggestions, please send 'em my way.

g
09-14-2008 08:13 PM
giggleblue
Quote:
Originally Posted by JenInMpls View Post
giggleblue, you're nominated as threadkeeper

I'd volunteer but I'm already in charge of the Dec 08 DDC roll call and if this thread is to be another seasonal one, I'm going to be tending a new baby while i'm tending to the roll call and I'm not going to have the time or energy!!
alright, i started one!
09-14-2008 03:52 PM
ellie74 Huge hugs to Smartycat, Quasar, and their little bean. I'm so glad everyone is okay!
09-14-2008 02:04 PM
JenInMpls smartycat, I'm glad you're okay. Don't dwell on the what ifs, because they didn't happen. And now you understand why you don't skimp on the car seat. (My personal subtle plug for a Britax.)

My friends down the street loathe minivans and they have a Toyota Pathfinder for their two children and absolutely immense dog - I have no idea what breed it is but he comes up to my waist and he weighs 140 lbs. It works well for them. And it's not a minivan.

Passing you a tube of arnica pellets (to help with the bruising)... jen
09-14-2008 01:35 PM
smartycat Is threadkeeper here even that hard? I guess I or quasar could do it. Run one for the rest of '08.

I'm still sore and super bruised. Half of my boob is a bruise and that is no small feat! : But with more rain coming I am sad. The rain almost hurt my family yesterday.
09-14-2008 11:43 AM
JenInMpls giggleblue, you're nominated as threadkeeper

I'd volunteer but I'm already in charge of the Dec 08 DDC roll call and if this thread is to be another seasonal one, I'm going to be tending a new baby while i'm tending to the roll call and I'm not going to have the time or energy!!
09-14-2008 11:04 AM
giggleblue smartycat! i'm happy that you are okay!!

off topic - we need a new thread...
09-14-2008 07:11 AM
smartycat Thanks for the hug MMM. I am sore as heck but OK. Before when it was just me, it would have been bad enough, but now I keep thinking... what if quasar was in the car? What if the baby was in the car?

Another sad thing is that I bought that car the same day we inseminated this cycle. Inseminate, buy car, inseminate again. So the baby was likely conceived that same day and now it is likely going to lose its little car buddy . BUT, I have been thinking that maybe we should have bought a minivan or some other equally as annoying vehicle if we are going to be transporting a baby and 5 dogs when we travel. Oh but wait, that was going to my parents and my dad doesn't like me anymore. Eh, just thinking out loud. They may not even total the car.

Jen: Low carb / high protein diets are the bomb! I need to get my fat rear back on one. And don't worry about the low fat thing. One of the theories about why low carb is so good is that it is really the process of excess sugar being stored as fat that makes your cholesterol go up and not fat intake itself. So if you are low carbing it, then your fat intake doesn't matter as much. I know when I was Atkins-ing, I had the best cholesterol numbers ever. I had low bad cholesterol and high good cholesterol. I think Atkins is the only diet they have ever shown to make the good one go up. Obviously you can't be that strict now, but just saying don't beat yourself up so much about fat content if you are being super good about your carbs.
09-14-2008 05:19 AM
MujerMamaMismo So glad you're ok smartypants. Take care of yourself.
09-14-2008 02:26 AM
quasar I haven't found myself being too overly emotional. However, I think my pregnancy hormones have leaked over to smartycat. She always has been more likely to cry watching a tv show than me, but recently it seems even more so.

Today, she was in an accident on her way to work. She's ok, just really bruised from the seatbelt. She was really lucky that she didn't get more seriously injured since she didn't really even have time to slow down when she hit the other person. Prior to being hit, the other driver had spun out and driven up an embankment. She must still not have had any control over her car, because she came flying down it perpendicular to an oncoming smartycat... Her car was hit right by the driver's side door and she was taken by ambulance from the accident scene. Remember to hug those you love tonight. Things like this are just so scary...
09-13-2008 06:19 PM
JenInMpls
Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie74 View Post
Anyone else go on crying jags at week 4?
Week 4? 4, 8, 12, 20, yeah, all the time... it's those hormones! Your body wants them out! Cry cry cry! I am a crying cheerleader. I know it feels really weird if you don't *want* to cry or you're not used to it, especially when it seems to pop up so randomly, but as I've mentioned before my dad worked across the hall from a tear researcher who determined that the #1 physiological reason for crying is release of excess hormones!

Quote:
Originally Posted by pleasantlyfurious View Post
I read on your blog that you haven't gained weight during your pregnancy. I'm about 35-40 lbs overweight and have been reading that not gaining weight might be a healthy option for me assuming my nutrition is on track. Was that something you aimed for or did it just happen?
It's true, 29 weeks in and still 2 pounds under my starting weight. I go to the midwife every month and wonder if their scale is broken or doesn't go beyond 198. The midwives are psyched about it; my mother thinks something is wrong with it and I swear I'm going to have the midwife write her a note but I'm guessing it's my diet, which is fairly high in protein and very low in sugar and refined grains. I drink a lot of milk, eat a lot of whole grains and beans and try to fit a fair amount of high-quality meat into my diet (grass-fed beef, pastured pork, free-range chicken). I aim for whole foods and succeed about 75% of the time by default. The one thing I don't do is eat low-fat; all dairy products are full-fat and butter is my friend. I really don't know if this diet would be working as well for me if I were not pregnant, but after I give birth, I'm aiming to find out - except that the two requests I have for directly postpartum are a Surly Bender and a jar of Nutella. That'll blow your low-carb diet out of the water right there.

Before I was pregnant, I was working on trying to eat more traditional foods; you'll find copious talk about this in my blog, especially if you click on the label 'food' in the sidebar. I'm hoping that once I get into the rhythm of having another child around that I will be able to pick this back up.

Last time, I lost 13 lbs the first tri and then gained back 19, and the midwives were happy with that. This time I gained 1 in the first month, lost two the second month, and then lost another and have been holding steady since then. the difference in losing weight this time is that I didn't just stop eating when I started to feel sick; I forced myself to eat in order to stop feeling sick. Plus I had a small one to run after and needed as much energy as I could muster. It has been over 10 years since I last weighed what I wanted to; I want to capitalize on the fact that my body is losing weight while the baby is staying healthy and keep losing after he's born. We'll see if that happens!

Angela, I'm glad you're lurking and that mamahood is suiting you so well.

eta: heartnbones: I did actually cry when I ran to the grocery store to buy chocolate milk one night after putting the child to bed AND THEY DIDN'T HAVE ANY. How dare they not have chocolate milk to fulfill the pregnant woman's all-day craving?
09-13-2008 05:58 PM
heart-n-bones pleasantlyfurious Same here. My biggest cry is when I go grocery shopping and can't find a thing that is appealing.
09-13-2008 04:06 PM
pleasantlyfurious
Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie74 View Post
Anyone else go on crying jags at week 4? I thought I was doing ok, but had one complicated argument with DP and ended up weeping hysterically. Then I was on hold (for almost 40 mins!) waiting for beta results from the doctor's office and just. couldn't. take it. Betas were good, but I'm still cryin'.

Of course, skipping my anti-depressant could have something to do with this. I had already cut down to the lowest possible dose to prepare for possible pregnancy, but I'm definitely feeling it. Or the hormones. Or both.

Good times!
I'm in week six and crying up a storm. I've always been pretty emotional, but it's a whole new level.

Tired? cry. Need a shower? cry. Hungry? cry.

During my sane periods I'm writing poor DP a thank you letter for being so supportive. I'm a freaking mess.
09-13-2008 10:20 AM
heart-n-bones Still feeling sick and tired over here. I have this weird thing where I feel like passing out almost every day after I eat lunch. DP theorizes it's because all the blood is rushing to my stomach to digest. Had a bad episode yesterday where I didn't have time to eat because I for got an appointment and had to rush out the door. I nearly passed out when I arrived at my appointment, but found some peanut butter crackers jsut in time. I'm definitely sleeping more than normal. And could pretty much go back to sleep as soon as I wake up. I'm looking forward to getting to the second trimester and hopefully feeling like myself again!
09-12-2008 05:14 PM
ellie74 Anyone else go on crying jags at week 4? I thought I was doing ok, but had one complicated argument with DP and ended up weeping hysterically. Then I was on hold (for almost 40 mins!) waiting for beta results from the doctor's office and just. couldn't. take it. Betas were good, but I'm still cryin'.

Of course, skipping my anti-depressant could have something to do with this. I had already cut down to the lowest possible dose to prepare for possible pregnancy, but I'm definitely feeling it. Or the hormones. Or both.

Good times!
09-12-2008 04:07 PM
quasar lemurmommies- I'm still having the fatigue big time. I could sleep all night, and then get up and go right back to sleep again...I would say that's my biggest symptom. I do feel weird when I don't eat regular meals- not really nauseus, but 'off'. Snacking doesn't really seem to help at all, it's more the need to actually eat something of substance.

Today I listened with a doppler and heard the heartbeat for the first time! : I'm 10 weeks today, and it was going nice and strong at aorund 172-180. When I had the u/s we didn't actually hear the HB, but we could see it.

Shoot... what was I just saying about not feeling nauseus...
09-12-2008 03:52 PM
lemurmommies
Quote:
Originally Posted by pleasantlyfurious View Post
How is everybody feeling?
I'm 7 weeks today and it's finally really starting to sink in. I can't get through the afternoon without napping while E naps. Of course, he also has a cold and has been a total crap sleeper at night, so that hasn't helped. No throwing up yet, although I did have some distinct nausea for the first time this morning; before that it was just vague nausea after eating.


Quote:
Originally Posted by starling&diesel View Post
I'm the gypsy of the two of us, so I love the idea of packing up and moving and starting again somewhere new. It tires her out just thinking about it, so I'm trying to come up with a destination that she'll be happy with.
We'll probably end up in Quebec, where she's from. Cost of living is much cheaper there, and the baby will learn French as a first language, which is important for us because DP's family is Francophone.
We're hoping to get back to Quebec not long after the baby is born too. I'm hoping summer 2010 at the latest, but maybe as early as fall 2009. Quebec needs more queers!


Quote:
Originally Posted by pigirl View Post
I'm in a kind of weird place of not feeling pregnant anymore. My 1st trimester symptoms have just about all gone (thank goodness!), but I'm not actually much bigger or feeling the baby move or anything yet. I mean, we heard the heartbeat right before 13 weeks, so I'm not seriously afraid that anything is wrong, but I'm just in a weird place.
That's exactly how I was feeling up to now. Peed on a stick at 4 weeks. No real symptoms, no cramping and no bleeding so no reason to suspect anything was wrong. Yet nothing to really strongly indicate that I am pregnant either. The fatigue is really kicking in now though, so there's no more denying it.
09-12-2008 03:02 PM
KnittingTigers
Quote:
Originally Posted by starling&diesel View Post
We're going on holiday this Sunday, camping in the maritimes for two weeks. I love, love, love camping, but I'm a little nervous about being uncomfortable sleeping with my baby belly. DP says we'll buy a blow-up mattress or something if our foamies don't cut it. But I hate spending money on that kind of thing. So then she said, "Ok, we'll buy it, use it and then take it back to Walmart and just take the karmic fallout for it." So there're options.
I went camping at 31 weeks and it was just fine. We did, however, have a blow-up mattress, and that really did help. Maybe just bring an old quilt or something for extra padding if you don't want to buy a mattress? I found I got more achey than usual while pregnant, especially at night. We also managed to set up camp in the middle of a mosquito-infested swamp, and, of course, I didn't want to use anything toxic, so I covered myself in Neem oil and it actually worked pretty well at keeping the beasts at bay.

And to everyone else, hi! I have in fact been lurking and reading, just haven't had time (or two hands) to type anything. I'm happy to report that all is well (great, even!) on the other side of queer and pregnant. Ocean is utterly, unbelievably, amazing. She's so beautiful and funny and smart and full of personality. I am completely in love.

And one of these days I'll actually update my blog, and become one of those utterly annoying people who does nothing but post cute baby pictures.

Must run now. My mom is doing afternoon childcare (finally worth all of the drama of having her in town...), and I should be using this precious time to work on my dissertation. Just wanted to pop in and say hi. I miss my queer and pregnant tribe!
09-12-2008 01:51 PM
pigirl Hi, folks. A belated welcome to plesantlyfurious and ellie. It's so cool watching the TTC crew find their way to the preggo thread.

Sorry to hear about the lay-off, giggleblue. That blows. I hope it turns out for the best, but at least for me, all change/transition comes with a good deal of stress. I'll be thinking of you.

Smarty and quasar, you can sign me up for the preggo thug squad. There's nothing more threatening (enlighten yourselves! now!) than a pregnant statistician, I always say. I hope they shape up soon, and realize what an incredible gift that baby is.

I'm in a kind of weird place of not feeling pregnant anymore. My 1st trimester symptoms have just about all gone (thank goodness!), but I'm not actually much bigger or feeling the baby move or anything yet. I mean, we heard the heartbeat right before 13 weeks, so I'm not seriously afraid that anything is wrong, but I'm just in a weird place. I feel like my old self again, so it's hard to believe that there's a living human beign inside of me. You know? Plus, I just told at work and now I feel like I'm under a microscope there. Blig. The reaction was universally positive, but it's an office of almost all mothers (and, like, 2 very well-behaved men), so there's also a lot of attention paid to these things. I'm hopeful that a little time will heal all of these woes, but I've been kind of quiet/keeping to myself in the meantime.
09-12-2008 01:34 PM
pleasantlyfurious Jen - I'm sure you are exhausted! I've been sleeping 12 hrs/night and pretty much taking it easy during the day and still am dragging - I can't imagine having kids to run after, too!

I read on your blog that you haven't gained weight during your pregnancy. I'm about 35-40 lbs overweight and have been reading that not gaining weight might be a healthy option for me assuming my nutrition is on track. Was that something you aimed for or did it just happen?

S&D - wow, those expenses must add up quickly! How great that you are looking at new places to live. I hope the transition goes smoothly and without stress. My family is from Mexico and I really struggle with doubts about how well I'll be able to teach our child Spanish. When I was growing up I had a monolingual (Spanish) grandmother living with me, so I picked it up as I did english. I would love to spend a year or two in Mexico while the baby learns language, but that is a far off dream.

Physically I'm feeling great (it's still quite early) but emotionally I'm pretty messy. I just generally feel malcontent and cranky - which is silly because I've been looking forward to this time for well over a year! There have been lots of tears and outbursts, but DP has been very supportive and understanding.
09-12-2008 01:25 PM
frog Busting in to say: smarty, I don't have a pregnant belly, but turtle and I would show up and...I don't know. Do something. Something supportive. Something extreme.

Freakin' people not supporting their loved ones' families. : :
09-12-2008 01:21 PM
starling&diesel I'm 18 weeks today and feeling great ... except the weight of the baby is starting to affect how I move and rest and try to sleep.
So that's taking some adjusting. A pillow here, a pillow there. Looking for places to sit down when I'm working. I'm starting to show a lot, so my fellow paramedics are starting to help without asking ... carrying my kit, doing the lifting. Thanks, boys! That makes work a little easier, but at the same time, my belly is getting in the way and I'm not sure how much longer I want to do the nasty stuff that comes with being a paramedic. I'm careful to keep my adrenalin in check, but I dread the suicide calls, and anything having to do with babies.

With me showing more, DP is really starting to realize how imminent this all is. Right now we live near a winter resort town in BC where she works as a chef and I work as a paramedic ... the cost of living is massive here. Our house was $510k and gas is $5.30/gallon and a loaf of bread is about $4. So, we're looking to relocate once the baby is here. That's getting DP scared and excited.

I'm the gypsy of the two of us, so I love the idea of packing up and moving and starting again somewhere new. It tires her out just thinking about it, so I'm trying to come up with a destination that she'll be happy with.
We'll probably end up in Quebec, where she's from. Cost of living is much cheaper there, and the baby will learn French as a first language, which is important for us because DP's family is Francophone.

We're going on holiday this Sunday, camping in the maritimes for two weeks. I love, love, love camping, but I'm a little nervous about being uncomfortable sleeping with my baby belly. DP says we'll buy a blow-up mattress or something if our foamies don't cut it. But I hate spending money on that kind of thing. So then she said, "Ok, we'll buy it, use it and then take it back to Walmart and just take the karmic fallout for it." So there're options.

Holy novel, batman. Enough for now. How about everyone else? Doing ok?
09-12-2008 01:03 PM
JenInMpls
Quote:
Originally Posted by pleasantlyfurious View Post
How is everybody feeling?
Round and tired. 29 weeks tomorrow. DW has been sick much of this week. Nothing like having 2.5 children to care for. My son turns 4 in less than a week and there are zero plans for his birthday. Oops.
09-12-2008 12:02 PM
pleasantlyfurious I'm headed to Austin for work this weekend (yes, hurricane and all!) and I'll be hitting the six week mark on the road - here's hoping symptoms don't hit me like a ton of bricks on the plane or during the workshop I'm facilitating!

How is everybody feeling?
09-10-2008 01:53 PM
ellie74 giggleblue, so sorry about your job. : what bad timing. therapy (in any form) is probably a great way to get through it, as is celebrating with DP!

As for the difficult parents out there, I have some queer friends who found their relationships with their parents vastly improved post-baby. The parents were just so happy to have a grandchild that their bitterness sort of dissolved. I wonder if it makes a big difference for people with hetero siblings who have kids the normative way.

My DP's parents seem much more open to us starting a family now that her only brother has come out. I guess they realize we're their best bet at this point for producing grandchildren.
09-10-2008 11:50 AM
pleasantlyfurious giggleblue - so sorry to hear about your job! I suppose it's never a good time to be laid off- but man! What lousy timing.
09-10-2008 12:33 AM
giggleblue congrats ellie!

i'm chiming in with the difficult parents. in fact my mother is sooo difficult that i haven't told her about the baby yet, and may never tell her.

we were originally waiting for dp to get pregnant also, before i told my mother, because i know if she knew i was pregnant and then subsequently found out about dp, she would ignore the dp news completely. so we wait. i'm still debating if it's even worth telling her either way, you know? she doesn't even acknowledge our relationship now, so i really feel like what's the point.

at any rate, i have been gone for some time. i got laid off from my job on last tuesday, and i've been dealing with that among trying to keep my life afloat. i'm now looking for another job and taking some therapy classes. the therapy classes are something i should have done months well years ago, but i was working so much i didn't have time.

regardless, i'm happy i'm staying pretty busy these days! dp's birthday is on friday and i'm looking forward to celebrating with her!
09-10-2008 12:19 AM
ellie74 thanks so much for the warm welcome and for the link. Making babies is sure a great activity for obsessive neurotics like me!
09-09-2008 10:49 PM
JenInMpls whoop whoop ellie yeah!!!

09-09-2008 08:34 PM
smartycat
Quote:
Originally Posted by quasar View Post
Your beta number sounds fine to me. Are you going back in a couple days to see if it doubles? That's generally the more important number. smartycat likes to go to this one site which listed a bunch of average test results and I'll see if I can get her to post it here...
www.betabase.info

I love that site!!

And congrats again! :
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