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01-19-2013 12:36 AM
EchoSoul

I was told by my mother in law that I had to essentially "sterilize" my breasts as one would bottle nipples. That I had to use soap to wash my breasts off after every feeding, because she saw our son developing acne on his face, flipped out, and said it was from not washing my breasts off after every time he fed. 

01-15-2013 10:06 PM
RobynHeud

Oh, can we please do away with the growth charts?  My first went from 6 lbs at birth to 18 lbs at 4 months, just on breast milk, and the docs were freaking out that he was gaining too fast and he was too tall.  Then, when his weight gain tapered, and he only gained 5 lbs over the next eight months they were still freaking out.  Now with my second, who is shorter and a little stockier than the first, my husband was told at his one-year appt that he was too short.  Short of malnutrition, there's not much that parents can do to affect how tall a child grows.  And if the docs can't handle not having growth charts, can we at least get updated ones that reflect normal growth of an EBF infant?

01-15-2013 10:34 AM
motherhendoula
Quote:
Originally Posted by tm0sweet View Post

I know this is an old thread, but I'm still fuming about this so I had to contribute. I was just told at my sons 1 month appt that he is over weight because he's gained 4 pounds since birth and I need to nurse him less. "stretch it out to every 3 hours" he's 97th percentile in height AND weight. He was born on the larger side and I nurse on demand! I wanted to tell the doctor "ok but when he's screaming cuz he's hungry before your 3 hours are up, I'm dropping him off with you!"

Oh, and when I was pregnant with my first and my grandma found out I wasn't planning on pumping she told me I was selfish because DH needed a chance to feed his baby too. To her credit, she has since confessed she is guilty that she listened to docs at the time and didn't nurse her 5 kids, and she is incredibly supportive of breast feeding. smile.gif


now you have me fuming!  MOST pediatricians...most people in general would give you a pat on the back and say   "GOOD JOB!!"   - not all EBF babies gain much weight at all in their first month - it takes time to get the nursing relationship working well.....4 lbs is a great accomplishment!.

01-15-2013 09:19 AM
pek64
Quote:
Originally Posted by tm0sweet View Post

I know this is an old thread, but I'm still fuming about this so I had to contribute. I was just told at my sons 1 month appt that he is over weight because he's gained 4 pounds since birth and I need to nurse him less. "stretch it out to every 3 hours" he's 97th percentile in height AND weight. He was born on the larger side and I nurse on demand! I wanted to tell the doctor "ok but when he's screaming cuz he's hungry before your 3 hours are up, I'm dropping him off with you!"

Oh, and when I was pregnant with my first and my grandma found out I wasn't planning on pumping she told me I was selfish because DH needed a chance to feed his baby too. To her credit, she has since confessed she is guilty that she listened to docs at the time and didn't nurse her 5 kids, and she is incredibly supportive of breast feeding. smile.gif

Sorry you were told that, but good for you for telling him off silently!! You know the truth, and he's a fool (at least where breastfeeding is concerned).
01-15-2013 08:02 AM
monkeyscience Oh wow... I would be finding a new doctor if they told me a 1-month-old was overweight - even if he was formula fed! I just don't think it's possible for a baby that age to overeat, especially with such tiny and relatively inelastic tummies!
01-15-2013 07:35 AM
tm0sweet I know this is an old thread, but I'm still fuming about this so I had to contribute. I was just told at my sons 1 month appt that he is over weight because he's gained 4 pounds since birth and I need to nurse him less. "stretch it out to every 3 hours" he's 97th percentile in height AND weight. He was born on the larger side and I nurse on demand! I wanted to tell the doctor "ok but when he's screaming cuz he's hungry before your 3 hours are up, I'm dropping him off with you!"

Oh, and when I was pregnant with my first and my grandma found out I wasn't planning on pumping she told me I was selfish because DH needed a chance to feed his baby too. To her credit, she has since confessed she is guilty that she listened to docs at the time and didn't nurse her 5 kids, and she is incredibly supportive of breast feeding. smile.gif
09-10-2012 10:47 PM
CheriK

I heard the must toughen your nipples advice, too, when pregnant 11 years ago.  Also heard lots of "you can't breastfeed twins."

 

The ones that make me most upset are the completely inaccurate comments from doctors. 

 

DD had anesthesia at 16 months to open a blocked tear duct and I was told by the ophthamologist that she had to fast for 12 hours prior, including breastmilk.  This for a child who hadn't gone more than 2 hours without nursing since birth.  To his credit, when I presented him with lots of research contraindicating the need to fast from breastfeeding, he readily agreed.  At least he was willing to learn. 

 

When my twins were 2, eating some solids but still getting the majority of their calories from nursing, our doctor told me that my milk didn't "count" any more and that they needed at least 24 oz of cow's milk a day for calcium.  WOW.  24 oz?!?!  I never calculated the calories out, but I'm fairly certain that would be more than the total calories they consumed (besides my milk) in a day.  That same day she insisted on testing their iron because they "must" be anemic.  She didn't even have the courtesy to come back into the room and tell me herself that their levels were fine, she sent her assistant.  That was the last straw w/ this doctor.

 

As my twins approached a year and beyond & were still nursing, I also got lots of "Oh, I could never keep doing THAT for SOO long" types of comments, like I was some sort of martyr sacrificing myself to breastfeed.  No, actually, breastfeeding makes my life easier.  They fall asleep quickly, they don't have tantrums, I never have to worry about not having a snack available. . .

 

My mom, who is a wonderful Grandma and has always supported my non-mainstream choices (she told me when I planned on having my 3rd at home that she didn't blame me because hospitals are horrible places . . . this from a woman who was a nurse), one time made some offhand comment that if I was still nursing when my twins were over a year, she wouldn't go out in public with me any more.  I was so shocked to hear that from her and immediately called her on it.  She now claims she never said that.

 

I'm so lucky to be surrounded by mom friends who also believe that breastfeeding until a child weans on their own, bedsharing for years, babywearing, etc. is just normal that it is now shocking to me when someone asks if my 3-year old (4 in Nov) is still nursing. 

09-05-2012 06:17 PM
ZoeStarshine
Quote:
Originally Posted by awritermom View Post

I ended up nursing ds1 until he was four.  Still nursing ds2 (21 months) and no comments from stepdad yet.  Guess over the years some of my comments must have sunk in a bit.  Or maybe my homeschooling takes up all the worry-space in his mind now.  ;-)

UGH, that's one of my issues with my dad right now. He made some comment the other day about "I guess that'll never happen [some bad thing on the television] to her, since you won't be letting her out of your sight." Like, uhhh...dad, seriously? I already explained that's not how homeschooling works (for us).

 

On our most recent visit, I was trying to nurse discreetly in the living room (despite the fact that my stepmom kept unsubtly hinting that I was making my dad and husband uncomfortable) and she suddenly asked, "Why don't you give her some water?" I explained in the friendliest way possible that breastfed babies don't need water, even in the desert, isn't that cool? Not two hours later, as I was nursing babygirl again, relegated to their bedroom, she said, "Can't you just give her some juice?" My daughter is 3 weeks old. Then again, she fed my youngest brother (10 years old now) solids at 3 months because she believes he is a "super baby" and she started spanking my middle brother at 8 months.

06-27-2012 06:47 PM
ShyingViolet
Quote:
Originally Posted by pek64 View Post

I saw this under Recent Discussions and had to respond, even though my son is 16 and weaned many years ago!
My parents once took me aside when we were visiting them, and my son was just a baby. They wanted to talk about how I was feeding him. They wanted me to give him formula because "This thing you do; it's just not natural!".
I was so surprised, I burst out laughing! Bad move, since my father was very sensitive to being laughed at, but that's another story.


Good for you for being able to laugh it off! I'm super sensitive, so if my parents had said something like that to me when my baby was small I probably would have burst into tears.

06-27-2012 01:13 PM
pek64 I saw this under Recent Discussions and had to respond, even though my son is 16 and weaned many years ago!

My parents once took me aside when we were visiting them, and my son was just a baby. They wanted to talk about how I was feeding him. They wanted me to give him formula because "This thing you do; it's just not natural!".

I was so surprised, I burst out laughing! Bad move, since my father was very sensitive to being laughed at, but that's another story.
06-27-2012 12:53 PM
motherhendoula

My mother told me the same thing when i was pregnant!  "You have to drink milk to make milk!"  i dutifully obeyed...although i detest milk and always have - i chugged a glass of skim down once a day for about two weeks when it suddenly dawned on me...i grew up around dairy farms.....i dont remember ever seeing the cows drinking from one another!    

06-27-2012 11:41 AM
Quinalla
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawberryprincess View Post

When my first was born, my mother was adamant that new mothers needed to drink plenty of milk so that they could make milk.  At first I thought this was logical, but as I thought about it, I've never seen a lactating cow drink milk, and they make lots!
My Mom made some offhand comment when she visited if I was drinking plenty of milk since I was breastfeeding. I think I made some kind of "Huh?" response as I was pretty sleep deprived and she covered like she meant that the calcium and what not was good for me. So I think she knew once she thought about it that it didn't really make sense, but it was amusing.

And not a comment, but when I explained to my DH that the milk comes out of a bunch of different holes on the nipple, not just one as a lot of non-saavy BFing folks think (me included once upon a time) his face was priceless smile.gif

I never got the comment said to me, but around me that "Babies should stop nursing when they can ask for it." which I always quip back with now that crying is how infants ask for it, some learn signs very early, etc. etc. so when is the proper time to stop nursing again?

Luckily strange comments were rare and everyone around me was so supportive. Even of pumping at work which can really weird some folks out, honestly it was weird to me at first!
06-26-2012 02:19 PM
Gavodir

Sorry for what may be a rude first post and I actually registered just to say this but I had what I found to be a humorous notion in relevance to the "roughing up" your nipples suggestion...

 

Should you also start fisting in preparation to give birth?
 

03-26-2012 09:46 AM
nstewart

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Adorkable~ View Post

i had 2 differnect super pro breastfeeding midwives tell me that my milk lost a lot of its nutritional value after one year or so and became more like water.  thankfully i looked it up and the science disproves that big time 

 


Thanks for this link!  I knew this (thanks to MDC!!) but didn't ever have the actual data to back it up!  Think I'll provide a copy to my doctor, since she clearly needs some info on BFing given that she tried to convince me to switch DS to cows milk at 9 mos and then again at a year. shake.gif 
 

 

03-26-2012 09:40 AM
~adorkable~

Quote:
Originally Posted by bookwise View Post
same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.


i would have straight up smacked her the second time she did this, or better yet just grabbed her boob! thats what i did when i was preggo to anyone that touched my belly, i grabbed theirs.



Quote:
Originally Posted by nstewart View Post
When I told some friends (who had had babies within a month of DS) that it never hurt to nurse, one of them looked at me and said "What kinky things was your husband doing to your nipples before you had D"? ROTFLMAO.gif


its so interesting that folks think it has to hurt and other think it is ever hurts something is terribly wrong when the truth it is always a huge range. mine never hurt past the first day shock of how strong the suck was. and when i told another mom that once she asked " then are you sure you are making any milk?" this was in front of my two EBF twins that had somehow survived to about 5 months at that point!


Quote:
Originally Posted by mareseatoats View Post

My little guy was 10 lbs 4 oz at birth and by day three was back at his birth weight (thank you placenta smoothie!) and at 5.5 months he's a healthy 25lbs. When people find out he's EBF I sometimes get "Are you sure he's getting enough?". My biceps say yes.


yeah how is it that when babies drink so much milk that they grow huge that folks immediately think that milk is not enough for them????? how did they get that big in the first place??!

 

 

 

 

 

i had 2 differnect super pro breastfeeding midwives tell me that my milk lost a lot of its nutritional value after one year or so and became more like water.  thankfully i looked it up and the science disproves that big time 

 

03-01-2012 11:24 AM
Mama Ana

That's what I thought! The hassle of pumping for me would be a bigger PITA than nursing a squirmy 7 month old right now! And if I even *talk about plugged ducts I get them so to stop nursing would a recipe for disaster.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by ShyingViolet View Post


NO! It's so completely not true that you have to stop breastfeeding if you get sick! AHHHH I'm so sick of people being told this! Breastmilk has awesome white blood cells and antibodies to whatever you're sick with that will pass to your baby and help protect them from getting sick too. Guhhh. Sorry, that's just like the fifth time in a month when I've heard someone mention being told this. So wrong. 

 

Plus, can you imagine having the flu and also having painful milky boobs? Sheesh. I had a doctor tell me this once and it just made me so mad.



 



 

03-01-2012 11:18 AM
lovepickles

Quote:
Originally Posted by bookwise View Post



same here! my ob said it right in the middle of examining me during one of monthly pregnancy visits - she grabbed one of my nipples and, i don't know any other words, kinda *plucked* at it and then *kneaded* it, like bread.. and then did it again. i was shocked and embarrassed. the next month, i asked her not to do that, a bit shyly, but still please don't do that. she did it again, laughing me off.

 

i switched obs that week, had my homebirth baby a few months later, and besides the normal adjustments one makes when first breastfeeding (yeah, it hurt a little! but i'm sure that had nothing to do with my non-roughed-up nipples), we were breastfeeding without problems by week 9. still going strong at 10 months tomorrow! so there, doc! pffffffffft! :P

 

 

This is highly inappropriate behavior. Even if you asked "shyly" your request not to be touched in this way should have been respected. This OB should be reported for misconduct. I had a similar experience with my ob that I won't go into here but if you ask a doc not to touch you and they do it is wrong, very wrong.

03-01-2012 10:11 AM
ShyingViolet


NO! It's so completely not true that you have to stop breastfeeding if you get sick! AHHHH I'm so sick of people being told this! Breastmilk has awesome white blood cells and antibodies to whatever you're sick with that will pass to your baby and help protect them from getting sick too. Guhhh. Sorry, that's just like the fifth time in a month when I've heard someone mention being told this. So wrong. 

 

Plus, can you imagine having the flu and also having painful milky boobs? Sheesh. I had a doctor tell me this once and it just made me so mad.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mama Ana View Post

omg some of these are just too funny!

 

I recently read, and I don't know if it is true, I have never heard anything about it. But I was recently looking up cold medications that are okay to take while nursing. One comment I came across said that if YOU, the mother, have flu like symptoms to stop breastfeeding til you feel better. That can't be right can it? I know nursing while sick is a huge PITA because all you wanna do is sleep but too stop all together? 

 

Anyway, my other story is similar to a lot of you. When my daughter was born my MIL and I were talking about nursing. She nursed my DH til he was 14 months and she said that was enough as it got "weird". She said that nursing into toddler who was weird in general and shouldn't be done. Me, being on a hormone high and in a persnickety mood said, "Well I'm going to nurse until Chloe (DD) self-weans, be it one year or three years." That shut her up for a few days. 



 

03-01-2012 09:43 AM
Mama Ana

omg some of these are just too funny!

 

I recently read, and I don't know if it is true, I have never heard anything about it. But I was recently looking up cold medications that are okay to take while nursing. One comment I came across said that if YOU, the mother, have flu like symptoms to stop breastfeeding til you feel better. That can't be right can it? I know nursing while sick is a huge PITA because all you wanna do is sleep but too stop all together? 

 

Anyway, my other story is similar to a lot of you. When my daughter was born my MIL and I were talking about nursing. She nursed my DH til he was 14 months and she said that was enough as it got "weird". She said that nursing into toddler who was weird in general and shouldn't be done. Me, being on a hormone high and in a persnickety mood said, "Well I'm going to nurse until Chloe (DD) self-weans, be it one year or three years." That shut her up for a few days. 

03-01-2012 05:34 AM
baileyb

lol on the homeschooling comment, awritermom! My IL don't know we are going to homeschool and made some comment about another family and the whole typical "socialize" thing...oh well he'll find out eventually.

02-28-2012 04:17 PM
awritermom

When my ds1 was five months old, I was visiting my parents.  My step dad asked me "when are you going to stop nursing him?"  (I planned on going for at least a year and then for as long after as it felt right.)  I said, "I'm not sure.  We'll see."  He said, "Well, you're going to have to let him grow up sometime!"  Okay, yeah, he's five months old...I better worry that he's too immature and start making sure he "grows up!"  LOL!

 

Stepdad also objected to carseats ("I never used one and I am fine.") and booster seats ("Why don't you just make him live in a bubble!").

 

I ended up nursing ds1 until he was four.  Still nursing ds2 (21 months) and no comments from stepdad yet.  Guess over the years some of my comments must have sunk in a bit.  Or maybe my homeschooling takes up all the worry-space in his mind now.  ;-)

02-28-2012 07:39 AM
~Nikki~

That's nuts!  I've been told that breastmilk is considered a "clear fluid" and can/should be offered to them when they're sick.  Anytime I've had a sick baby, breastmilk has made them feel better.  Heck, I remember after my son had weaned, about a week later he came down with a nasty flu bug.  I offered the breast and within hours he was feeling better.  That was the very last time he nursed. 

02-28-2012 07:28 AM
Katielady

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Nikki~ View Post

After I was having a mild freak-out about how much daycare is going to cost us when I go back to work, my spouse advised me not to let myself get stressed out, because he had heard that stress makes your milk curdle.  I kind of laughed at the visual of curdled chunky milk and the logistics of it all.....gross!



Ha! It's fascinating how our consumption of cow milk has affected people's people's perception of how breastfeeding works. People are way more familiar with dairy than with breastfeeding and so they project dairy concepts onto nursing. Our boobs are not little refrigerators holding pints of milk that can spoil- they are PRODUCING the milk, fresh every time.

 

I had a pediatrician, who I chose because she was a trained LC (not an IBCLC mind you), tell me to stop nursing when my son had rotavirus at 8 months. She was lumping breastfeeding in with the no dairy rule for stomach virus. I trusted her so I pumped for half a day and gave him droppers of pedialyte as she'd suggested. But it felt wrong to me and I started nursing again, and he kept that down WAY better than the sugary artificial crap I'd been advised to give him. Even trained professionals often don't realize the vast, vast difference between cows' milk and human milk. So much education is needed!

02-28-2012 06:49 AM
~Nikki~

After I was having a mild freak-out about how much daycare is going to cost us when I go back to work, my spouse advised me not to let myself get stressed out, because he had heard that stress makes your milk curdle.  I kind of laughed at the visual of curdled chunky milk and the logistics of it all.....gross!

02-27-2012 12:38 PM
Thing1Thing2

"Anyway, after a while I needed to get that nursing session in before we needed to go so I started to nurse and she got all freaked out, saying, "I'll just go over here while you have your INTIMATE TIME"

 

uhhhhmmmm... LOL!!!

02-25-2012 10:34 AM
Carriebird

 

 

Quote:
She asked if he was breastfed and I said he was, and she immediately set in talking about how her daughter didn't nurse her two kids and felt bad about it and that she kept telling her, "It's a personal choice! It doesn't matter!" I'm sitting there listening, nodding, thinking "I really don't care whether your daughter nursed and why!" I hate it when my breastfeeding is seen, in itself, as some kind of criticism of those who don't. I'm doing my thing, I haven't said a word about you, so leave me be! Anyway, after a while I needed to get that nursing session in before we needed to go so I started to nurse and she got all freaked out, saying, "I'll just go over here while you have your INTIMATE TIME."

 

 

It's no wonder her daughter decided not to nurse either of hers!

02-25-2012 10:10 AM
lunarlady My grandmother recently found out I'm still nursing DD2 (18 months). Our conversation went like this:
Her: "You're still nursing her?"
Me: "Yes."
Her: "But doesn't she have teeth?"
Me: "Yes, she is actually cutting her molars now."
Her: "Honey, you have to stop before she bites your nipples clean off!"

She was so very shocked and concerned for my well being. I didn't tell her that I nursed DD1 till age 4 and my nips are still firmly attached. eyesroll.gif
02-25-2012 08:13 AM
baileyb

Quote:
Originally Posted by youngspiritmom View Post

 

 

Hey! I have that statue in your profile pic on my kitchen table!!

02-24-2012 03:26 PM
Redmom

Quote:
Originally Posted by redheather View Post

I was told by a sleep "specialist" (ugh!) that my DD's digestive system would become "over-burdened" and "out-of-whack" by night-nursing, "just like an adult who gets up in the middle of the night to snack!"

 

 


"sleep specialist" - double ugh!

 

 

02-24-2012 09:14 AM
youngspiritmom


This thread is absolutely hilarious!!! Where do they get these ideas??? My faves:

Quote:
Originally Posted by livacreature View Post

on the bus, a lady was going on about her daughter planning on breastfeeding and her fears that her grandchild would be MORE INCLINED TO BE A CANNIBAL! 

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by chel View Post

My father, that grew up near dairy farms, told me that I needed to wean as the cows needed humans to drink their milk or they will explode!


 

ROTFLMAO.gif

I was told all the classic ones...that breastfeeding after age one will give my son perverted sexual issues, that the art of breastfeeding should have "come naturally," and that I should stop breastfeeding simply because I had trouble with it and had sore nipples.

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