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  Topic Review (Newest First)
07-06-2014 08:07 AM
t2009 Thanks @uniselyriver! New thread is up.
07-04-2014 05:43 PM
unuselyriver T2009 it is easy if you want to do the july thread i can tell you how i did the thread last year i just change the tile and copy everything on the first page to put in new thread and just change the months that all and dates for people
07-03-2014 02:27 PM
t2009 Do we need a July thread? If someone tells me how to do it I can start it.
07-03-2014 02:05 PM
t2009 Sorry @MsBe . I hope your talk with your friend went as well as it could go. Don't beat yourself up over any of your feelings--they're all totally reasonable even if you think you should somehow be able to just be happy for your friend. It's so complicated & you can only be the best friend that you can be. Hopefully you can set some boundaries with your friend if necessary & continue to be open with her about your own struggles right now. Good luck & you can vent away here.
07-02-2014 07:02 PM
unuselyriver can i be move to waiting to know i think i have ovulate cause i started to spot today and i have been doing that every month around the same time for the last 3 months
07-01-2014 04:44 PM
Anna1979
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsBe View Post
***Need help recovering from bombshell.
I am about to take the kids to the lake and the woman whom I call my best female friend, M, just telephoned to tell me she is pregnant. She opened by asking how our baby-making plans were going and I innocently told her that AF had just arrived again but how my half-marathon training was keeping me occupied and I was feeling pretty positive about this fall, and then she says "well, I'm seeing someone new" and I am happy for her and then she says, "and I have some more news... I'm pregnant!" and I just barely held things together enough to act happy for her until she said she had to get back to work but she would call this evening. And it was totally an act, and I feel kinda awful about it but I have lots of mean, envious thoughts beating up the meek little angels on my other shoulder reminding me that I love a world with children, and this is still another child that I will get to love and I love my friend M and I want to be happy for her. I haven't felt this conflicted for months and it is brutal. I promised I would talk to her more tonight and I really need to get my game face on before then, or even better, muster some genuine joy at her news. She and her new bf have been dating since April, "on and off," she says, and "they haven't been fighting so much since they found out they were expecting," 2 weeks ago. She had a pregnancy scare last fall (with a different guy), and at that time I asked her if she was trying to get pregnant and she said no. She spent Christmas with us (she has no family nearby)and I gave her Honoring Our Cycles, (like TCOYF lite, for those who don't know) because she said that although it was a false alarm (or chemical) she just couldn't bring herself to use birth control because she is Catholic. (Umm, aren't Catholics supposed to abstain until marriage?) But I know that she has felt frightened by our age too and probably really wants to have a child before it is too late, although she won't admit any of that, and I am worried for her, she's only known this guy for a few months, and then I wonder if my worry isn't really frustration/ annoyance/ anger at the Universe that I am in a happy and stable marriage and have been trying "on and off" for a year and here I am again wiping blood. Yup, this has put a damper on my day. Kind words appreciated.
I'm sorry I don't buy the whole Catholic thing. I'm Catholic and I've used birth control. I'd have a hard time putting on a happy face in your shoes. Having said that I've felt this way myself when I heard about my BIL's ex getting pregnant (she's a drug user, has been a hooker, has abandoned her first child in the care of her mother and my mother in law for months at a time) and everyone expects me to be happy. I wish I had some words of wisdom to share but I still haven't figured out how to deal with this myself.
07-01-2014 12:03 PM
MsBe ***Need help recovering from bombshell.
I am about to take the kids to the lake and the woman whom I call my best female friend, M, just telephoned to tell me she is pregnant. She opened by asking how our baby-making plans were going and I innocently told her that AF had just arrived again but how my half-marathon training was keeping me occupied and I was feeling pretty positive about this fall, and then she says "well, I'm seeing someone new" and I am happy for her and then she says, "and I have some more news... I'm pregnant!" and I just barely held things together enough to act happy for her until she said she had to get back to work but she would call this evening. And it was totally an act, and I feel kinda awful about it but I have lots of mean, envious thoughts beating up the meek little angels on my other shoulder reminding me that I love a world with children, and this is still another child that I will get to love and I love my friend M and I want to be happy for her. I haven't felt this conflicted for months and it is brutal. I promised I would talk to her more tonight and I really need to get my game face on before then, or even better, muster some genuine joy at her news. She and her new bf have been dating since April, "on and off," she says, and "they haven't been fighting so much since they found out they were expecting," 2 weeks ago. She had a pregnancy scare last fall (with a different guy), and at that time I asked her if she was trying to get pregnant and she said no. She spent Christmas with us (she has no family nearby)and I gave her Honoring Our Cycles, (like TCOYF lite, for those who don't know) because she said that although it was a false alarm (or chemical) she just couldn't bring herself to use birth control because she is Catholic. (Umm, aren't Catholics supposed to abstain until marriage?) But I know that she has felt frightened by our age too and probably really wants to have a child before it is too late, although she won't admit any of that, and I am worried for her, she's only known this guy for a few months, and then I wonder if my worry isn't really frustration/ annoyance/ anger at the Universe that I am in a happy and stable marriage and have been trying "on and off" for a year and here I am again wiping blood. Yup, this has put a damper on my day. Kind words appreciated.
06-30-2014 06:22 PM
t2009 Been a bit silent, but I'm hoping you're all doing well!
@Wilhelmina , I'm so sorry you are feeling so down. You are a great mother for your little girl, so don't let any of this make you think any differently. You are doing all that you can & need to, and this is the right moment to focus on figuring things out for her. You will get to the bottom of it all, I am confident! In the meantime, though, I am really sorry that you are not getting the care & answers you need. Maybe a biopsy to definitively rule out celiac would be a good thing--my SIL reports that her niece had no problem with hers. As for GAPS, I know your daughter is a really selective eater, but I've heard good things about doing GAPS & children being less picky after. And I've heard so often that foods we "crave" can truly be the ones that cause us the greatest problems--so dairy & gluten may be key. I second the smoothie recommendation--even adding coconut oil and or butter. I did make coconut milk kefir for a while & I quite liked it--Not sure how your daughter is with fermented flavors. Continued good wishes, mama!
@Anna1979 , great news about your DH's swimmers! And glad your tests came back normal, too! I hope you have a good discussion with your naturopath. I am trying to get DH to take some of the nutrition stuff seriously, but we're both kind of stressed out right now so I'm not pushing it. But I'd LOVE it if I could get him to take zinc & C10 & a couple other things!
@ememers , crossing my fingers for you for testing later this week!!
@MsBe , I hope no AF, but if so maybe the next cycle will be it! What does it mean, by the way, your astrologically fertile cycle? And congrats on the 16 miles!!
@mamacatsbaby ,

AFM, we were camping with friends this weekend & just got back. It was so much fun. But I drank too much, didn't eat great & didn't take any vitamins or my TCM herbs. Sigh. Not feeling terribly confident going into TTC for this cycle. But I'm getting some CM & transitioning to more fertile CM today so I'll take it as a good sign. But I've also been feeling a ton of anxiety lately. It was nice to get away for the weekend but I still feel it just below the surface. Part of me feel like another pregnancy/child would help, but part of me knows that isn't true. I do know that the m/c triggered a lot of anxiety for me re. my son. I have so many worries about him, it's literally driving me crazy. Camping was healthy, though, as we were with another family & I let DS go off with their son for long bouts without direct supervision, so I was trying really hard to let go of some of my anxiety. I'm looking forward to acupuncture tomorrow night. Good night!
06-30-2014 10:20 AM
mamacatsbaby Wilhelmina will your daughter drink smoothies? Maybe you could try a dairy-free milk alternative like hemp milk and add some good fatty stuff like avocado (she might not taste it blended up with other stuff). Hemp milk is decently fatty and quite creamy. Will she eat grains and meat? Rice and bacon are great together. You can put a vegan butter substitute in the rice (if she can tolerate the ingredients) and/or EVOO, grape seed oil, etc. for extra fat. What about coconut milk? I'm trying to think of things fatty and good on calories that might help while you're figuring things out with the docs. Does she like peanut butter? Almond butter? You can make coconut milk yogurt and cheese if she can tolerate coconut. Thinking...

MsBe, I but don't have a lot of time to post so . I also value my sanity so I keep it .

A big to all you gals out there in TTC land.
06-30-2014 08:01 AM
Anna1979 Well I spoke with my naturopath and the results she has gotten back are all within normal range. I'll get a copy of them when I see her tonight so I'll know the exact numbers.
06-30-2014 05:44 AM
MsBe @Anna1979 After reading your post I went and asked DH if he was remembering to take his vitamins, he hadn't been of course. How'd the other test results look?
@ememers KMFX for you
@mamacatsbaby Glad to see you still hanging around
@Wilhelmina Wish I had some answers for you Mama. Try and keep your head up, you and your DD will get through this.

I am feeling a little crampy today so I think AF is probably on her way. I was pretty sure we were a day late DTD on our camping trip so I'm not really disappointed. And if she does come tomorrow it will put me on track to O on my astrologically fertile day next cycle which is kinda cool. I was an exercise beast this past week. Put in more than 16 miles of running and felt pretty great doing it. I don't feel quite so miserable in the beginnings of my runs as I had before, so I'm taking that as improvement. It is wonderful having my nephews here this week. They are just turned 9 and about to be 12 and they play so well with DS that it has really soothed my fears about spacing. My birthday is Thursday and I am feeling really optimistic that this will be the year of my rainbow.
06-30-2014 03:58 AM
Wilhelmina
Quote:
Originally Posted by ememers View Post
@Wilhelmina , I'm so sorry you are meeting such opposition as you try (like the great mama bear you are) to do what's best for your daughter! I went through food allergy hell with my son too, we thought he was allergic to gluten and dairy (both allergies run in my family, I stay away from gluten but can handle good quality dairy if it's un-pasteurized or cultured). I put him on the GAPS diet (you can google it), where you strip down to the least allergenic foods and then slowly add back in. It was hard, but really worth it. Problem is, you basically have to eat all meals at home for a while, as it is so restrictive. My son was on it for about a year, and now he can eat anything (impossible to say if he just grew out of it or if the low-allergenic diet helped his system heal to the point where it no longer bothers him.) Your daughter acting lethargic when you took out dairy could just be a detox reaction, if she is not properly breaking the milk protein down it can become almost like an opiate in her system. She should snap out of it in a day or two.

I am in the TWW still.... planning to test later this week, maybe Wed or Thurs? Not sure yet. Trying to be hopeful but not get my hopes up too much! It's an impossible balance, I'm afraid. Thinking of you all!
I wish I could do something like GAPS diet with her, but she is so insanely picky and has only a few foods that she eats (all of them contain gluten and/or dairy) that she'd starve to death on such a diet. The saying that children won't starve themselves is such a load of BS. Yes, they will. My daughter will. She didn't like the yogurt we gave her for breakfast, so she just didn't eat, period. Got really tired and lethargic, but just laid on the sofa with the food in front of her. Then she finally ate for lunch - I made her her favorite food - and all of a sudden had energy again.

Our issues are: she's obviously allergic to something as she has eczema, doesn't look healthy (probably deficiencies), she's insanely picky and even on all-inclusive/normal diet we worked hard to get enough calories in her so that she could function. Plus, she isn't growing. Her growth has been slowing down since she was 12 months and now has stopped completely for 3 months. She lost weight.

The hospital was supposed to call us today to invite us for blood tests. It's 1PM and nobody's called. I called in and talked to a totally clueless nurse. Stella went down in her weight even further just after two days of dairy-free diet. I have no confidence in the hospital and the doctors. Down in the dumps again.
06-29-2014 06:27 PM
ememers @Wilhelmina , I'm so sorry you are meeting such opposition as you try (like the great mama bear you are) to do what's best for your daughter! I went through food allergy hell with my son too, we thought he was allergic to gluten and dairy (both allergies run in my family, I stay away from gluten but can handle good quality dairy if it's un-pasteurized or cultured). I put him on the GAPS diet (you can google it), where you strip down to the least allergenic foods and then slowly add back in. It was hard, but really worth it. Problem is, you basically have to eat all meals at home for a while, as it is so restrictive. My son was on it for about a year, and now he can eat anything (impossible to say if he just grew out of it or if the low-allergenic diet helped his system heal to the point where it no longer bothers him.) Your daughter acting lethargic when you took out dairy could just be a detox reaction, if she is not properly breaking the milk protein down it can become almost like an opiate in her system. She should snap out of it in a day or two.

I am in the TWW still.... planning to test later this week, maybe Wed or Thurs? Not sure yet. Trying to be hopeful but not get my hopes up too much! It's an impossible balance, I'm afraid. Thinking of you all!
06-29-2014 10:08 AM
Wilhelmina @MsBe @mamacatsbaby Thank you so much ladies! Yes, I've been insanely stressed out, almost desperate, just had that drowning feeling… now I'm starting to calm down a bit.

Right now, we're on milk free diet to see if anything changes - we're supposed to do completely milk-protein free (even free of goat cheese and sheep cheese) month as her allergy test showed a possible allergy - one has to get >0.35 to be considered allergic and she got 0.33, so very close. We already know she's allergic to egg white, but that doesn't cause failure to thrive - it's only gluten and milk allergy that can cause FTT. So we're seeing if it's the milk now. Her celiac tests keep coming negative (but I know it's very easy to get a false negative, especially when it comes to a small child).

I found AMAZING vegan cheese and even Stella loves it … I'm so relieved because 99% of her diet is dairy. Still don't have a good yogurt and milk alternative, but I'm hopeful now. The first day of her milk-free diet, she hardly ate anything and got nearly lethargic … it scared me. But today (her second day), she's been eating much better.

I talked to a different GI doctor who also has an insane picky eater at home and he's much much more proactive. He says he also wants Stella to get a biopsy to factor out celiac disease - but we'll wait with that until at least the fall.

Things are finally moving along … it feels much better now.

Thanks to all this stress, my diet has been horrible and I've forgotten to drink my chinese tea … Not at all thinking about becoming pregnant now - it's so far removed from my mind right now. I really want to have all of this stuff figured out first before starting another 'project,' so to say.
@Anna1979 Your husband seems to have some really high quality swimmers! Congrats! Really happy for you!
06-29-2014 06:35 AM
mamacatsbaby Wilhelmina, you're not a horrible mother, you're stressed the hell out and depressed; take it easy on yourself . Have you tried or have any of the doctors you've seen suggested going on a total elimination diet where you strip down to the least allergenic fruits and vegetables and slowly start adding things back in that might be triggers? With the Celiac testing at some point you practically binge on gluten right? I've been up Crap Creek and back in food allergy hell with our DS1 and yeah, one of the unfortunate side effects is blaming ourselves. Because you're so concerned and dedicated to your child I know you'll go around the world for her as many times as it takes which leads me to believe that you will indeed find the right doctors as well as the answers you need. Mothers have that alarm in our brains for a reason. You are in fact strong enough to keep going! Thinking of you and your family...
06-27-2014 08:12 AM
Anna1979
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsBe View Post
Only have a quick minute to check in, but wow @Anna1979 , if I'm reading those numbers right it looks like DH has some super swimmers there! Good news on that front, eh? How much longer 'till you get the results from all that blood they took?
@Wilhelmina Nothing you wrote sounds ridiculous and you are NOT a horrible mother. You are a wonderful and obviously deeply concerned mother. Stella is very lucky to have you and making time for your own very legitimate grief over your loss and desire for another child does not mitigate that. I am so sorry you have this struggle on your plate now. I will join you in praying that you get some answers/ relief soon.

We are heading out to my sister's lake house for the day. I will do more persies and my own update when we return tomorrow.
Yes it does look like he's got some good ones. He did admit to me that he has been doing some reading about male fertility issues and since some of the articles recommended taking zinc he has been helping himself to my zinc supplements for the last few months. He's already taking Q10 which is something that my naturopath has recommended for both of us. It's nice to know that he has been taking a proactive approach to his end of TTCing.

I'm hoping to have my results at some point today for 4 out of the 6 tests. The other two take a few weeks to complete.
06-27-2014 06:12 AM
unuselyriver Wilhelmina your not crazy at all i had the same type off problems with get help for my son when he need special formula for a protein allergy so its not easy get the help you need when you know what the problem is and they dont want to listen to you that why you have to keep looking for someone who will listen to you
06-27-2014 04:29 AM
MsBe Only have a quick minute to check in, but wow @Anna1979 , if I'm reading those numbers right it looks like DH has some super swimmers there! Good news on that front, eh? How much longer 'till you get the results from all that blood they took?
@Wilhelmina Nothing you wrote sounds ridiculous and you are NOT a horrible mother. You are a wonderful and obviously deeply concerned mother. Stella is very lucky to have you and making time for your own very legitimate grief over your loss and desire for another child does not mitigate that. I am so sorry you have this struggle on your plate now. I will join you in praying that you get some answers/ relief soon.

We are heading out to my sister's lake house for the day. I will do more persies and my own update when we return tomorrow.
06-26-2014 07:20 PM
Anna1979 Well we got DH's SA results back and everything looks normal.

Volume 3.0mL (Normal is 1.5 mL)
Sperm concentration 79.8x10^6/mL (Normal is 15)
Total Sperm Count 239.2x10^6 (Normal is 39)
PH 8.5 (Normal is>]7.2)
Progressive Motility 60% (Normal is 32%)
Total Motility 60% (Normal is 40%)
Progressivity @37% (coded 0-4) 4 (Normal is 3-4)
Sperm Morphology 20% normal (Normal is >4)
06-26-2014 07:23 AM
Anna1979 @MsBe - Even though DH and I have gotten pregnant twice within the last year my naturopath still wanted DH to get a SA done to make sure that part of the problem wasn't low quality sperm since that can lead to miscarriage. He did grumble a bit but once I pointed out all the test I had already done and all the stuff I was doing in terms of acupuncture and supplements and that this was the only test he had to do so far he bucked up and got it done.

AFM - just waiting to O at this point. I have another appointment with my naturopath on Monday and I should have DH's SA results to take with me so that should be good. I might call my Dr and see if any of my test results have come back yet and if they have I'll get them faxed over to her so we have those for my appointment on Monday.
06-26-2014 12:37 AM
Wilhelmina @Melinda1980 - We've had her tested for celiac disease already about 4 times - just the blood tests - and all came out negative. However, it's well known that these tests are highly inaccurate, especially in small children. Her genetic test showed a predisposition to celiac disease plus her paternal grandmother has it (fully diagnosed). Besides that, she even looks like a celiac child - very pale, hardly any hair (and she's 3!!!) and the hair she has is like straw and almost doesn't grow in length, dark circles under her eyes, very fragile looking (think legs, arms) with a bit of a protruding belly. She also has dry skin all over her body and a few eczema spots. Yet the GI doctor won't write a note to her daycare for gluten-free food because it's against the hospital policy. I can't send food with her to her daycare because it's against the rules. So, it's a bit of a catch 22 that you don't want the health of your child to end up in … but it did. And I'm literally freaking out.

I know this might sound ridiculous, but the worst I feel whenever Stella is around children her age - that is when it's so apparent how thin, tiny and pale she is - she really doesn't look like one of them. She's also so weak compared to them - doesn't really run, can't balance on things, can't climb on higher things … she seems to be standing on the outside looking in, which is something she didn't have to do before - she's always been in the middle of all play. Before all of her peers grew way over her head (literally). It makes my heart break. Some children her age now started telling her she's actually a baby and that she's too small to play with them … That is just horrible. She keeps saying all the time: 'I'm big and strong' probably because everyone tells her the opposite.

I'm sitting here crying, really. I can't take this anymore. I can't take seeing my child like this. The fat little amazing absolutely perfect little baby she was before … I never thought she'd be like this just a couple of years down the road.

I just got off the phone with a nurse at the pediatrist's office and the pediatric doctor is of course on vacation and won't be back until the end of July. We're also seeing the nutritionist and another GI doctor tomorrow. I'm literally calling and emailing everywhere I can to get some help rallied. I've let this slide for way too long. I should have never taken her off the gluten free diet and I should have started earlier. If I'd only known and if I wasn't so self-absorbed with all that miscarriage crap … I really feel like a horrible mother right now. It's also making my fuse short and I can't even talk to my DH without some sort of mini fight. I am so stressed out I can't even express myself clearly.

I'm sorry I just depressed the heck out of you all, but I don't have any other outlet right now …

I'm just praying for Stella even though I'm not religious. All I want for her is to be healthy and strong.

06-25-2014 07:31 PM
t2009
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsBe View Post
@t2009 I feel the same way when the cousins are around. I just love having a house full of kids, in some ways it seems so much easier than just my one very extroverted kid. He needs so much constant one-on-one when there are no other kids around. I am really happy with the dedication I am putting into training for this race. I already ran 9 miles this week; 5 on Monday, and 4 yesterday home from Tai Chi class. I'm pretty sore but not too bad, I'm planning to do either a 30 min or 50 min yoga practice today; I'm hoping to convince my 13 yo old niece to do it with me. She runs xc so I will take her out running tomorrow but I'm pretty sure I can't manage it today. I started running again pretty soon after my m/c last year but never really committed to it, mostly out of fears that too much strenuous exercise might compromise my chances TTC. But as months turned into a year I decided I was tired of putting off the activities I enjoyed and made me feel good for what may or may not happen. I know what you mean about the tight clothes. I gained weight quickly before my loss, (so quickly that one of the women in my book group guessed I was pregnant at 6 weeks) and after the loss it was really hard to deal with the constant reminder my puffy belly was of the baby that was no longer there. It is hard to maintain a balanced outlook on cleansing and nourishing ourselves but not getting freaked out about getting to that "perfect place" before TTC. I try to remind myself that healthy babies are born all the time to women with less than healthy lifestyles. I think most of the women on this board are doing above and beyond the norm in this area, so I guess I'm saying it's good to practice conscious self-care but don't let yourself get overwhelmed by it. The gloom is understandable, I think you are doing the right thing to just allow it to run its course. Excited that you may be ready to start TTC this cycle!
@MsBe , you are a machine! I am so impressed by your dedication to physical activity! Very cool & inspiring. And you've taken the words out of my mouth regarding my own son--He is so extroverted & both DH & I are introverts--He could really use a sibling...

Thanks for your support on the weight & wanting to be at the "perfect" place before TTC. I keep trying to tell myself that there is no "perfect" time or place to be in before TTC. Yours is a good reminder. Thank you.

Good luck finding a new TCM practitioner. And good luck with your DH. That's a tough one, but hopefully he can meet you part way. Maybe you can talk to him about dropping one of his "bad habits" instead of hoping that he'll kick them all (maybe the smoking...)? It so much more visceral for women, I think, that it's hard to get through to our male partners--It's abstract for them.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wilhelmina View Post
Afm: I'm really starting to make noise in regards to my daughter. I really hope the specialists start hustling and giving me some answers. I am considering on going gluten free with my daughter. We tried it for about 8 weeks earlier this year and she actually had a small growth spurt. Since then she hardly grew - when we switched back to normal diet. The problem there is the fact that we need a piece of paper for the daycare provider so that they give her only gluten free food - otherwise we can't really even properly try it out. I think it would need at least full 3 months to test its effect.
Oh, @Wilhelmina , I'm so sorry you're going through so much right now. Man, I hope the powers that be lessen up the stressors for you. As for your daughter, I don't want to butt in too much, but have you had her tested for celiac disease? I have 3 family members who were recently diagnosed with celiac, so we've all been educating ourselves on it--I know that stunted growth can be a symptom in younger children. Anyway, you're mention of her having a growth spurt when she was off of gluten just struck me. If you haven't had her tested yet (& want to) she actually has to be consuming a fair amount of gluten for the test to be accurate. There are blood tests, but even the scope is brief & fairly innocuous in terms of procedures. Definitely worth considering before you take her off of gluten. Hugs. I know this isn't so stressful for you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wilhelmina View Post

I have to say I'm not as healthy as I should be either … I try, but my efforts haven't amounted to much so far. All I have improved upon were adding green smoothies to my diet, prenatal vitamins and doing a little extra exercise … still not enough - still not what I planned …

I finally called my gynecologist today and she assured me that the brown discharge was absolutely fine - that it takes several months for a woman's cycle to get back to normal after miscarriage - the longer the pregnancy, the longer it takes for the body to recover. So I guess a 13 week pregnancy will take at least three months or 3-4 cycles. I expected that, it makes sense. Them Chinese (I mean TCM) sure know their stuff too. There's no reason to rush things, I should know that by now.

I wanted to answer more of you, but now I'm tired … I wrote a longer post earlier, but it got deleted (hate this new version of the board!!!)
And I'll just echo MsBe's message to me--You're doing what you can right now--Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Be gentle & make changes slowly. It's funny--Though I can't even recognize how I used to eat even just 3 years ago, the changes have happened so slowly that I couldn't tell you one thing that I've done to "change" the way I eat. Pick one small change that will make you feel good but that isn't overwhelming, then that might lead to another, etc.

On a better note, I'm glad you got some reassurance from your gyn! It sounds like your body is doing its thing & healing at a good pace all things considered.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Melinda1980 View Post

@t2009 I know exactly how you feel. Even tho I only got to 9.5 weeks pregnant I had gained about 5 pounds. So now here I am, no longer pregnant, and looking like a mess with no clothes able to fit. Which of course I didnt mind when it was for a good cuase, but this just feels like crap. Normally I just eat a healthy diet and walk and that works for me, but now I feel like I have to do something to take care of these 5 lbs (which definitely look like more than 5 to me, but the scale says otherwise) so when I ttc again soon Ill at least start from my normal weight. Good luck to you on your journey of healthy eating and exercise!
@Melinda1980 , that's me to a tee (bolded). It's so weird because walking is my go-to exercise & relatively easy to fit into a regular ol' active lifestyle... Well, I have a desk job, so I'm not as active as I'd like to be, but I try to move around as much as possible during the day.

AFM: Waiting to O. Not saying we're going to TTC, but there you have it! Good night, ladies!
06-25-2014 12:53 PM
Wilhelmina @MsBe - My DH also drinks way too much coke, doesn't work out and does some stuff that is known to be bad for his swimmers … I've already had a few talks with him about how he needs to take responsibility for his half of the deal and that it can't just be me making all of these positive changes. It's hard for him - probably harder than for me - because he has a very demanding stressful job and lots of these 'bad' things that he consumes/does help him alleviate stress. Going to the gym is out of question for him right now, but he does ride his bike nearly every day to work …

I have to say I'm not as healthy as I should be either … I try, but my efforts haven't amounted to much so far. All I have improved upon were adding green smoothies to my diet, prenatal vitamins and doing a little extra exercise … still not enough - still not what I planned …

I finally called my gynecologist today and she assured me that the brown discharge was absolutely fine - that it takes several months for a woman's cycle to get back to normal after miscarriage - the longer the pregnancy, the longer it takes for the body to recover. So I guess a 13 week pregnancy will take at least three months or 3-4 cycles. I expected that, it makes sense. Them Chinese (I mean TCM) sure know their stuff too. There's no reason to rush things, I should know that by now.

I wanted to answer more of you, but now I'm tired … I wrote a longer post earlier, but it got deleted (hate this new version of the board!!!)
06-25-2014 10:46 AM
Melinda1980 @MsBe Sounds like you've had a lot going on, but mostly fun stuff! My dad will be staying with us for a week in July and Im hoping that isnt while Im ovulating! I can relate on the partner not taking care of himself! My DP hasnt been to the gym in about 6 months and has been snacking and just generally not taking care of himself lately. He's even gained some weight and has commented on it himself that he wants to work on it, but he isnt working on it at all! Im giving him some time because he started a new job about a month ago, but I really hope he starts taking better care of himself soon and I hope your DH does the same.
@unuselyriver Hearing about rainbow babies is just about my favorite thing right now so thank you for sharing that!
@t2009 I know exactly how you feel. Even tho I only got to 9.5 weeks pregnant I had gained about 5 pounds. So now here I am, no longer pregnant, and looking like a mess with no clothes able to fit. Which of course I didnt mind when it was for a good cuase, but this just feels like crap. Normally I just eat a healthy diet and walk and that works for me, but now I feel like I have to do something to take care of these 5 lbs (which definitely look like more than 5 to me, but the scale says otherwise) so when I ttc again soon Ill at least start from my normal weight. Good luck to you on your journey of healthy eating and exercise!
@Wilhelmina Thats very interesting about the GF stuff! Has she seen an allergist? Also, could you send her GF food at daycare or will they only give her their own food?
06-25-2014 10:33 AM
unuselyriver I hate this new format i cant get it to do right
06-25-2014 10:29 AM
unuselyriver please be place in waiting to o
06-25-2014 07:09 AM
Wilhelmina @Anna1979 Hugs! Good luck with the tests and the next cycle!

@ememers @MsBe Still crossing my fingers for you!

@t2009 I have even more issues that I'm not sharing here that are horribly stressful, so I'm personally happy I'm even functioning right now. Im sure you know the expression: when sh*t hits the fan ...
I'm trying to focus on my daughter right now. Getting pregnant even before we reach any resolution would really feel ... Not sure how to even describe that. Thanks for responding. I hope AF ends soon and you'll get to TTC - or decide where to go from there. My first après-D&C period felt like a big thing - that is when I felt like I was slowly rising from the rock bottom.

Afm: I'm really starting to make noise in regards to my daughter. I really hope the specialists start hustling and giving me some answers. I am considering on going gluten free with my daughter. We tried it for about 8 weeks earlier this year and she actually had a small growth spurt. Since then she hardly grew - when we switched back to normal diet. The problem there is the fact that we need a piece of paper for the daycare provider so that they give her only gluten free food - otherwise we can't really even properly try it out. I think it would need at least full 3 months to test its effect.
06-25-2014 05:41 AM
MsBe Thanks for the well wishes @unuselyriver . I am trying to remain confident that it will happen in it's own time.
@Anna1979 Sorry that AF showed up, but hopefully you will get some answers from your testing. 8 vials I used to give blood pretty regularly but I could never actually watch the blood leave my body without feeling a bit queasy. I would love for my DH to get a SA. It seems like the quickest and easiest thing to test and I feel like he could use a real kick in the about taking care of himself. He hasn't been to the gym or worked out at all since our race in April. And he has some nasty habits that I'd really like him to make more of an effort to curb. Unfortunately since we conceived so quickly the first two times our naturopath thought it would be a waste of time and patience is all that is needed at this point. So for now, that's what we are working on but it sure would do a lot to put my mind at ease if we knew that his swimmers were actually up to the job. Maybe I'll try again to push for it in a month or two.
@t2009 I feel the same way when the cousins are around. I just love having a house full of kids, in some ways it seems so much easier than just my one very extroverted kid. He needs so much constant one-on-one when there are no other kids around. I am really happy with the dedication I am putting into training for this race. I already ran 9 miles this week; 5 on Monday, and 4 yesterday home from Tai Chi class. I'm pretty sore but not too bad, I'm planning to do either a 30 min or 50 min yoga practice today; I'm hoping to convince my 13 yo old niece to do it with me. She runs xc so I will take her out running tomorrow but I'm pretty sure I can't manage it today. I started running again pretty soon after my m/c last year but never really committed to it, mostly out of fears that too much strenuous exercise might compromise my chances TTC. But as months turned into a year I decided I was tired of putting off the activities I enjoyed and made me feel good for what may or may not happen. I know what you mean about the tight clothes. I gained weight quickly before my loss, (so quickly that one of the women in my book group guessed I was pregnant at 6 weeks) and after the loss it was really hard to deal with the constant reminder my puffy belly was of the baby that was no longer there. It is hard to maintain a balanced outlook on cleansing and nourishing ourselves but not getting freaked out about getting to that "perfect place" before TTC. I try to remind myself that healthy babies are born all the time to women with less than healthy lifestyles. I think most of the women on this board are doing above and beyond the norm in this area, so I guess I'm saying it's good to practice conscious self-care but don't let yourself get overwhelmed by it. The gloom is understandable, I think you are doing the right thing to just allow it to run its course. Excited that you may be ready to start TTC this cycle!

With all this running, especially the hill running (any running around here means lots of hills), I am thinking I need to get in to see the chiropractor again soon. I haven't done much research into finding a new TCM practitioner yet but want to get that started again too. I didn't do much charting this month, just enough to confirm O, but I am planning on charting more consistently starting next month. I told DH that all I wanted from him for my birthday (early next month) is to see some positive lifestyle changes, earlier this spring he was doing great, losing weight, not smoking, but I found some butts down in his office the other day and I've sen the Diet Coke and coffee consumption creeping up again too. Most of all, I wish he'd exercise more because I think that may have a lot to do with his low libido. I really am hoping for a fall conception and read somewhere it takes 70 days or so to make new sperm. I told him I expect him to be putting out some super swimmers come September. We'll see how it goes. Maybe with the threat of an SA hanging over his head he will be inspired to "study for the test" as it were.
06-24-2014 11:35 AM
t2009 @Melinda1980 , glad to hear you're feeling a bit better. Feeling even a bit more normal is a major victory, I'm finding. And SO much fun that you get to spend time with your 2 oldest kids this summer! That's very special.
@Wilhelmina , sounds like your body is kicking into gear, too! Glad you're getting some fertile CM--better than last go. Ugh, I guess this does take a while, huh? Let us know if your gyn. has any insight for you. It must really suck to still have spotting going on--We're you prone to spotting before? And now that's a long time to wait for your results.

I'm so sorry to hear that you're still experiencing the trauma. There are so many variables at play in he decision to TTC or no & when. It's stressful but I hope you can think of it less as being responsible or not--you're doing the best you can. And right now in particular it sounds like a lot of stressors so I'm glad that acupuncture was relaxing. You deserve it & a lot more!
@MsBe , hi there! Glad the trip was nice (minus DTD)! And now you'll have visitors, how fun! I love having my nephews over (which makes me think if I ever successfully have another, I may still not be done...). Sounds like you may have gotten some coverage... It only takes one well timed DTD!! I hope your symptom spotting is right on!

And good for you with the running. I am really struggling with getting physically active. My body needs it but I've been so stressed & overwhelmed since the miscarriage (1 month ago this past weekend) I just haven't gotten there. Thanks for the link for the juice cleanse! I will check it out.
@ememers , crossing my fingers for you during the TTW!
@unuselyriver , welcome! Happy to "meet" you & hear of your rainbow!
@Anna1979 , bummer about AF. Hoping you get some answers with the tests.

AFM, my period is dragging on (day 7...) but I'm mostly just happy it's here. But now that we're able to maybe TTC, I'm feeling very conflicted. The spotting beforehand doesn't seem like a good sign. On the other hand, my period has been lighter with zero clots, so that seems like a good sign! My energy level is good. Sleep is decent.

My clothes are all tight, which is a painful & constant reminder of our recent loss. I don't begrudge the weight gain per se, just the fact that it reminds me of being pregnant. As I write this I am walking up & down the stairs at my work--still trying to get back to moving my body more.

Still, I can't shake this persistent gloom, but I am not trying to fight it--I understand everything is still raw. But I'm really leaning toward TTC this cycle. I will discuss with my acupuncturist.

I'm also reading Green, Clean & Lean, a book about toxic load & weight loss--my regular doc recommended it for general tips on eating & living cleaner. It's a bit terrifying & makes me not want to TTC until I can do further cleansing. (Because my son has some teeth issues, I'm worried about my own toxic load, even though I've definitely cleansed my system some since giving birth & I live & eat so much cleaner now than I did even just 2 years ago.)

As you can see, I'm mostly just confused.
06-24-2014 10:46 AM
Anna1979 Well AF showed her face yesterday so we're back to square one. I did go and get my blood tests done yesterday and I was in and out very quickly which was nice. They did take 8 vials of blood which took some times since I'm a slow bleeder. DH is dropping off his SA sample today so we're going to be waiting for test results.

Please move me to the waiting to O section
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