Mothering Forums - Reply to Topic

Thread: Fertility Challenged Graduates Thread - Spring/Summer 2014 Reply to Thread
Title:
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Trackback:
Send Trackbacks to (Separate multiple URLs with spaces) :
Post Icons
You may choose an icon for your message from the following list:
 

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



  Additional Options
Miscellaneous Options

  Topic Review (Newest First)
Today 07:24 AM
tracyamber Good day again mamas!!!!!!!
Today 07:18 AM
NaturallyMo Had my regular maternal check- upyesterday. I have gained one pound so far this pregnancy, which is goodaccording to midwife. She suspects I will see some slight increase over thenext few months. Since I had a little extra cushioning beforehand, they don’t want me to gain too too much weight.

Baby Boy’s heart rate was 159 and he was kicking up a storm.She said I’m doing just fine. Oh by the way, my placenta is posterior, whichexplains why I feel everything.

Busy busy weekend ahead with DS’s birthday party and myin-laws arriving in town later today for the festivities. I’m pretty much goingto be on the go for the next 4 days so I’ll catch with you guys later!
Yesterday 07:53 AM
tracyamber Good morning ladies!!!
I'm just saying hi. It can be quiet in here. Thanks @monkeyscience for getting our rooster color coded!!!
@ hope4light I hope you are well. I like it when you come out of lurking. You always provide so much support and validation for feelings. I wish I better at that.
@Xerxella , I know you are on vacation. You are pregnant with twins!!! @Kewpie , where is my bump buddy??
Hi everyone else!
As for me, I'm still a bit fatigued and I'm sure I am getting over the morning sickness. The mornings though I realize can dictate my day. I have been struggling with what to eat for breakfast. Lately it's been a bowl of raisin bran and and egg. But I feel a little sick after the cereal. Maybe after not eating all night it is not what the baby/ my body wants. This morning I went for an egg with pieces of chicken. I didn't even add salt or anything. I feel like I do well with protein. And I'm having a chai tea. So we will see.
We got our inspection yesterday and we have some repairs and more negotiating to do on the house. Spots are dry rot. The ocean air and wind is so harsh on coastal houses!! I really really like this house.
Because we spent 40 k to get pregnant and just bought/ buying a house dh husband is telling me he does not want to spend the $200 on the MaterniT test. A big part of me thinks everything is okay with this baby and if anything shows up it will be seen in an ultrasound. Also, no matter what we want this baby so, I'm kinda not sure if I will do the test next week.
Okay, if you got this far thanks for reading. I'm just rambling..... Early morning ramblings.... Nothing important.
Tracy
Yesterday 06:00 AM
hope4light Mo - For what it's worth.... we didn't find out the gender of either of our LO's. When DS came, I KNEW we were having a boy. Mother's intuition lol. I was all good with it - actually kind of excited since we already had a girl. In some ways I had thought it would be nice to have another girl, to give DD a sister, but I also wanted to give her a brother, so either way I (thought) i'd be happy.

After DS was born, a couple weeks in, I suffered from gender disappointment. I felt like the WORST mom EVER. It was horrible!!! I wrote a post on it on my blog in case you're interested in checking it out, it may help you out, it may not, but I had to mention it since I've been there. Here's the link to the specific post (funny enough it's one of my most popular - and I don't have a ton of followers):

http://3hearts2hold1love-emms.blogsp...pointment.html

I'll tell you now, I wouldn't change it for the world. I couldn't imagine having anyone but my little guy. So allow yourself time to grieve the loss of the little girl you wanted, and by doing so, it will allow yourself to really be happy about having another little guy!!

Autumn - sorry about the issues, I'm also here for you if you want to PM me.... DH and I have been through our fair share of ups and downs, including a separation and quite a bit of couseling.

Hi to everyone else! I keep reading, but don't post too often. I hope all is well!!!!
07-30-2014 09:04 PM
monkeyscience FINALLY managed to fix the roster colors. I know, I'm the only one who cares. But it was making me crazy. Ahem.

autumn - Sorry things have been going rough for you, especially with your dh. If you don't feel comfortable complaining here, feel free to complain to me via PM. Sometimes, you just need to vent. And YAY for such a "cheap" baby.

Mo - Glad you are feeling more accepting of a boy. I know you'll work through it. It's okay to feel some initial disappointment, though.

Boots - Have you heard back about your testing yet? Did I miss that? I've read everything, but am just now getting to reply and need to go to bed rather than reread the thread.

Everyone else - sorry I'm not doing very well with personals. But I love hearing from you all.

AFM, 31 weeks, baby is so, so, so wiggly - I finally know what moms who talk about feeling the baby do flips are talking about. My son, while wiggly in his own way, simply did not do the acrobatics this little girl pulls off. Yesterday, several times, I felt her trying to turn - I could literally feel her get in a transverse position, kick and squirm a little, then go back to whatever position she'd been in before. Such a weird feeling! Next appointment with the doctor is in a little under a week. I hope she can tell me if the baby is still breech (in which case, I want to encourage her flipping efforts!), or if she's turned vertex (in which case, I hope she keeps getting stuck before turning!), because I really cannot tell. Anyway, more I could say, but I really have to go to bed.
07-30-2014 07:43 PM
NaturallyMo I feel better today after a night's rest and a moment to process everything. I'm definitely happy about this baby and are coming around about the fact that its a boy. I am going to ask for a confirmation next week at my scan follow-up just to be sure.

The family is over the moon and I talked to my mom about my feelings. She said it was ok and that its normal. We've shared the name with some of the family but I'm holding out on revealing the sex with friends and coworkers until we're sure.

So, we're having a baby!!!!!
07-30-2014 09:53 AM
Autumnlaughing @Tracey amber - yeah... I went into this thinking it'd be more like $10k than $200, but it's a huge weight off. $44k is painful!

@mo - congrats on a healthy kidlett! It's totally ok to be disappointed, you'll still be a great mom to him, too!
07-29-2014 09:54 PM
tracyamber @Autumnlaughing
Wow, that is so cool and incredibly unfair!!!! our insurance paid nothing of the $40,000 we had to spend.
@NaturallyMo
Congrats on having a very healthy and active little boy. I have a feeling I may be having another also.
07-29-2014 07:22 PM
NaturallyMo U/S went well. Have to go back next week to do it again. Baby moved too much to get all of the pictures. Initially she told us it was a girl but it looks like its a boy again. So we're having a boy.

I'm happy but honestly I'm feeling really letdown. Everyone around us has said nothing but girl for MONTHS and then the tech says girl and then completely throws us for an emotional rollercoaster with saying boy. Hubby was really upset with her for that. I almost wish I had never found out at this point. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy about this baby but I need a moment to accept the fact that I will not have a girl.

We told DS who really didn't care and walked off to play with his toys. Go figure. DH told his parents and we haven't heard from them. He suspects that if said girl they would have called but its another boy and I guess his family just really doesn't make girls at all. If this was a girl, it would be the first girl in three generations.
07-29-2014 10:26 AM
Autumnlaughing Omg - I just confirmed that insurance covered all but a $15 co-pay for our IVF cycle! Well, and about $150 for meds and the last u/s, which had another co pay. Also, I don't need a referral for chiropractic care!

So, that's good
07-28-2014 07:22 AM
mainebaby Hello all, just popping my head in for a bit. SO awesome to see so many ladies expecting!! Love it. And lots of twins Just wanted to let ya'll know we found out we're having a boy! Yahoo! Take care all Sorry I suck at keeping up with anything that isn't my email & Facebook, lol. Sending you all lots of hugs and healthy baby wishes!
07-28-2014 02:19 AM
Sourire I can like posts from my phone using the Tapatalk app...
07-27-2014 12:47 PM
tracyamber @Autumnlaughing
Isn't it interesting how our coping skills get altered? Sorry you can't run and such. That is frustrating.
I'm sorry you are having these issues. Hugs mama! I noticed in my last pregnancy the cartilage between my pelvic bone hurt soooo much and I was limited too. Till this day I sleep with a pillow between my legs so my knees don't touch.
Yarn is fun!!!!
How about your spd? Did you find it got elevated when you got pregnant? I feel like this is happening to me.
Hugs to you again and sending positive energy. Glad the baby is doing well. You are more than half way there.
07-27-2014 11:25 AM
Autumnlaughing I miss the like option on mobile as well.. but not enough too switch to desktop for it!

I don't think I had any issues before. In fact, I love dance & never really noticed any difference in movement between my hips. I hear I it's usually a non-issue except in pregnancy?

Various websites say that I shouldn't be crossing my legs or sitting on the floor, both of which I did so habitually that I didn't believe I could stop. Also, to go up & down stairs one at a time (with the good hip on the higher side), and to keep my knees close when moving in bed or getting in and out of the car. Also not to mop or vacuum or sweep - one of the three, but I use the same motion for all, and I can feel the bones pull apart and come back together, so I've stopped all of them for now.

It's not really a ton of limitations, but both my house and office span two floors, I had to cancel a dance performance, and even walking the half mile into town seems to irritate it some. Also, I want to sort all the cute baby clothes, but only the floor is big enough.

I feel like a lot of my coping with stress mechanisms aren't available (running, dancing, anything that involves walking, even cooking! and the back up of drinking, which is probably for the best) and that makes it just that much harder to keep DH's depression from taking over.

I'd (on purpose!) Cultivated a bunch of child-free enjoyments during the infertility years, but I didn't expect to lose some of those!

I did decide that I can garden (kneeling is probably fine, right? And I found my gloves) and I'm slowly but surely decluttering the house. And I seem to have my yarnwork muscles back, so I'm making an afghan for the little one. So, I'm figuring it out, it's just harder than I expected....
07-27-2014 08:32 AM
tracyamber Btw , I wish I had the l"like option on my mobile. So in order to get it I have to switch to desktop*sigh* anyone else have this annoying issue?
07-27-2014 08:29 AM
tracyamber @Autumnlaughing
Did yo have spd before the pregnancy? I ask because it is the oddest thing but it seems when I get pregnant I have it. Or somehow i don't acknowledge it and when I'm pregnant it becomes full blown. Have you heard of such a thing?
What kind of things cannot you not do? If you don't mind me asking. What would you like to be doing? Just trying to get a better picture on what is going on with you. Sure sounds like you have some supportive friends.
Sending you hugs and you can totally whine here!!!!!!!!! I do!!
07-27-2014 06:40 AM
Autumnlaughing Sorry to be so quiet lately - I feel like I'm just whiney, and most of them don't belong on the internet.

Congrats on the house tracryamber! We were planning to buy early on, but between my fatigue & DH's depression, it just wasn't feasible. Thankfully, we can stay where we are, so that's good - I've started having some SPD issues, and it's been bad enough along him for help with everything as it is! The place you're moving to sounds gorgeous though, and I'd jump the chance!

Monkeyscience - I still haven't gotten the bill for the IVF cycle! I think our anatomy u/s was just a co-pay - so @ $30?

Kewpie - it does sound super stressful to be at your in-laws. My brother is also in Utah (the Park Slope area?)... He's not really a kids type, but he is pretty excited to be an uncle!

Mo - your u/s date is off my screen - good luck! Glad to hear that you're well.

AFM - my only real issue is the mild SPD, which just has me frustrated because I already can't do a lot and I'm only 5 months in! But little girl seems fine, I can even take video of her kicks. I have awesome friends who've given me tons of baby stuff, and feed me & listen to me whine. And we hit 24 weeks yesterday! So that's exciting.
07-26-2014 05:37 PM
kewpie80
Quote:
Originally Posted by tracyamber View Post
I'm so excited right now!! We have been looking for a house and finally yesterday we saw one we absolutely loved and made an offer and this morning our offer was accepted! One side has a lake view and the other side has an oceanview!!! A great back yard with lots of sun and plenty of room for 2 kiddos running around and my own cave and a surf cave for dh!!!!!!!!
How and the hell am I going to pack???? My mind is definitely off of the morning sickness
That sounds amazing!!!! We've starting house hunting too and it's daunting. We still live in the first house we bought and I'm not sure how the sell and buy thing works when you already have one.
07-26-2014 02:33 PM
tracyamber I'm so excited right now!! We have been looking for a house and finally yesterday we saw one we absolutely loved and made an offer and this morning our offer was accepted! One side has a lake view and the other side has an oceanview!!! A great back yard with lots of sun and plenty of room for 2 kiddos running around and my own cave and a surf cave for dh!!!!!!!!
How and the hell am I going to pack???? My mind is definitely off of the morning sickness
07-26-2014 02:30 PM
tracyamber That's sounds like a great idea @monkeyscience !
07-26-2014 02:02 PM
monkeyscience I will ask around and see what I can find out.
07-26-2014 01:59 PM
kewpie80
Quote:
Originally Posted by monkeyscience View Post
Not that I know of, but I will ask around, if you're interested. Even if you'd just like someone to help sometimes. Most of them have kids, but there might be some who would do some in-home babysitting.
Sure, just feel them out and see if there would be any interest. We'd pay, of course. We'd want someone who would be willing to be on call day and night for the labor and could drop everything and come to our house and take care of M&L when it started. I've never labored more than 10 hours. And then some during the day help for about 4-6 weeks with the older twins after the new babies were born.

No worries if there's no interest. I'll figure something out eventually.
07-26-2014 01:47 PM
monkeyscience
Quote:
Originally Posted by kewpie80 View Post
HA! Provo is only about 10 minutes away from me. I live in springville. Any of them nanny?
Not that I know of, but I will ask around, if you're interested. Even if you'd just like someone to help sometimes. Most of them have kids, but there might be some who would do some in-home babysitting.
07-26-2014 08:14 AM
kewpie80
Quote:
Originally Posted by tracyamber View Post
@Kewpie
Yeah, that is a hard one. Could your in laws stay with you for 6 months? It might be easier to set boundaries with the in laws.
@monkeyscience
Our ultrasounds are costing about $97 with ppo and deductible met. I dunno though, just giving you more info.
I wish. My MIL has rheumatoid arthritis and needs infusions every few weeks.
07-26-2014 08:13 AM
kewpie80
Quote:
Originally Posted by monkeyscience View Post

Kewpie - Wow, that is a big decision. I guess moving sounds like way too much upheaval for me, especially with the irritating FIL. Is he retired, or would he at least be gone most of the day? Do you want to borrow some of my family in Utah? They're very nice. I have a brother in Provo who loves kids, along with assorted awesome cousins
HA! Provo is only about 10 minutes away from me. I live in springville. Any of them nanny?
07-25-2014 09:09 PM
tracyamber @Kewpie
Yeah, that is a hard one. Could your in laws stay with you for 6 months? It might be easier to set boundaries with the in laws.
@monkeyscience
Our ultrasounds are costing about $97 with ppo and deductible met. I dunno though, just giving you more info.
07-25-2014 11:53 AM
monkeyscience Mo - Yay for feeling better! And for being so close to your big ultrasound. Hope baby is feeling cooperative that day!

X - Have fun with your vacation. I really wish I could take a vacation. We're hoping to go home for Thanksgiving, but that's the closest we have to a vacation plan at this point. Where are you headed?

Tracy - Glad things seem to be smoothing out for you. Yup, having some Braxton-Hicks, and have had for awhile. Not tons. I didn't even know what they were with my son until close to the very end of pregnancy. They didn't feel the way I expected, I guess.

Kewpie - Wow, that is a big decision. I guess moving sounds like way too much upheaval for me, especially with the irritating FIL. Is he retired, or would he at least be gone most of the day? Do you want to borrow some of my family in Utah? They're very nice. I have a brother in Provo who loves kids, along with assorted awesome cousins

AFM, not a lot going on. I'm exhausted too, and was even moreso in the first half of my pregnancy. I can't blame it on being old (even though 30 feels old sometimes!) or twins... I blamed my toddler.

On a totally different note, have any of you had to pay out-of-pocket for your ultrasounds? With my son, we had a PPO, and the ultrasound was 100% covered, even though we hadn't met our deductible. The insurance company paid about $175, and that was it. This go-round, we have a high-deductible plan. Even though we used in-network facilities for both of our ultrasounds, our EOBs are saying they'll cost $350-500 a piece! Even their own price estimator on the website says the cost should be around $200-250. Anyone else experience this? We haven't actually gotten bills from the facilities, so I'm hoping this is one of those things that will just disappear in the paperwork. We paid $105 for the first ultrasound at the time it was done, and were given to understand that they had already called our insurance, and that would be our cost. Hoping that remains the case!
07-25-2014 10:03 AM
kewpie80
Quote:
Originally Posted by NaturallyMo View Post
Oh wow @Kewpie that's a lot. I say go with what your gut tells you is the best decision.
That's the trouble. My gut is as confused as my head. The idea has only been tossed around for about a week now, so maybe something will come to me after a while. We have such a tiny cramped 2 bedroom house. I wish we had a third bedroom and could just hire a live-in nanny for half a year for the older twins.
07-25-2014 09:58 AM
NaturallyMo Oh wow @Kewpie that's a lot. I say go with what your gut tells you is the best decision.
07-25-2014 09:17 AM
kewpie80 I've been exhausted as well. I emptied half the dishwasher and needed a rest. haha 2 days ago, we laid down carpet in the kids' room and switched to toddler beds and cleaned and I'm still recovering.

We're seriously considering moving in with my inlaws for the last 3 months of the pregnancy and first 3 months after the babies are born. We live in Utah and they live in CO. This is such a huge and hard decision. We've been married 15 years and have never lived with anyone before. They have a large house and we'd have almost full run of their finished basement, but it's still tough, ya know? I get along great with my MIL and she's super sweet and doesn't step on toes, but my FIL is a different story. He can be an ass. He's super controlling and runs his mouth sometimes. We were there visiting for a long weekend last week and he decided to set up some electric trains on the floor in the living room. Maisie and Liam were curious of course and Liam is OBSESSED with trains. My FIL kept yelling at them for getting too close. I was super annoyed. They're 2 years old for crying out loud! Also, I was teaching Maisie something while there and he stepped in and started talking to her over me. I'm worried about how much he'll take over.

That said, the closest family we have here in Utah is about 30-40 minutes away and she has 5 children of her own, so not much help. I'm mainly worried about what we'll do with M&L when i go into labor or if I have the complications I did with them again. I had unexplained bleeding around 22 weeks that put me in the hospital for 3-4 days. I had a shortening cervix starting around 20 weeks that put me on bedrest from then till the end. Then I developed pre-eclampsia and had to be induced at 36 weeks.

We own our own house and would come back to it after the 6 months is up, so we wouldn't have to move ALL of our stuff. We'd just take the essentials and put our valuables into storage. We'd do this in mid-october, so not a huge amount of time.

Plus, I'd have to switch OBs, endocrinologist, Maternal fetal specialist, find a new hospital, chiropractor, and also a new pediatrician for my kids and then switch back to the originals. We also have 4 cats that we'd either need to rehome or somehow find someone will to take care of them for 6 months.
This thread has more than 30 replies. Click here to review the whole thread.

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off