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Forum: Personal Growth   12-15-2013, 11:58 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 323
Posted By mom0810
I'm sorry, I meant that it might have *become*...

I'm sorry, I meant that it might have *become* that way.  
Forum: Adoptive and Foster Parenting   12-15-2013, 10:28 AM
Replies: 8
Views: 1,059
Posted By mom0810
I honestly just think he's a higher needs baby-...

I honestly just think he's a higher needs baby- personally, I think the Primal Wound is B.S.  I am an adoptee, adopted at birth, and by nature was always an "easy" baby.  My brother, also adopted at...
Forum: Personal Growth   12-15-2013, 08:35 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 323
Posted By mom0810
You have to be okay with her not wanting...

You have to be okay with her not wanting contact.  Even if it was an open adoption, the level of contact may have been nil- because she may have wanted it that way.  As an adoptee, I can tell you it...
Forum: Personal Growth   12-14-2013, 01:18 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 323
Posted By mom0810
I'm an adoptee, and if you want my honest...

I'm an adoptee, and if you want my honest advice, I would not contact her, I would instead allow her to come to you IF she chooses to do so.  She might not.  I am 40 years old, and just had contact...
Forum: Personal Growth   11-25-2013, 10:29 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
I think that the whole Primal Wound thing, which...

I think that the whole Primal Wound thing, which honestly IMO is based on junk science and personal bias, has become really popular in the anti-adoption crowd.  I have never met an adoptee to...
Forum: Personal Growth   10-30-2013, 08:54 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
I'm not sure I'm in the minority... I think...

I'm not sure I'm in the minority... I think perhaps the minority online... but not in real life.  I've never met a person who was adopted in real life that wasn't completely happy about it....
Forum: Vaccinating on Schedule   09-16-2013, 10:29 AM
Replies: 17
Views: 632
Posted By mom0810
This is interesting, as I've recently been...

This is interesting, as I've recently been looking at the tetanus vaccine schedule for different countries.  In the U.S., you are expected to get a booster every ten years.  This is even after the...
Forum: Personal Growth   09-15-2013, 08:02 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
It's totally legitimate to feel this way, I just...

It's totally legitimate to feel this way, I just want to point out how inaccurate "Just like any other person- I have one mom and one dad" is.
 
Silly Sapling, you are so right and I apologize....
Forum: Personal Growth   08-23-2013, 01:05 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
OrmEmbar,   Thank you SO much.  Yes.  This...

OrmEmbar,
 
Thank you SO much.  Yes.  This is just how I feel.
 
And frankly, if I have answered the same question in one thread more than once, yet the question continues to be asked, then...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-23-2013, 12:11 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Right- so you have one child who knows her BM...

Right- so you have one child who knows her BM and thinks of her and I'm sure talks about her. You don't think that influences the other children?

Three weeks in your son's case is much different...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-23-2013, 11:37 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
If your son has questions, perhaps that is due...

If your son has questions, perhaps that is due to the fact that you have several degrees of open adoption in your family, and that is discussed often?

BM *is* in fact a surrogate in my view....
Forum: Personal Growth   08-23-2013, 11:35 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
I'm not hostile... Or adamant... Except for the...

I'm not hostile... Or adamant... Except for the fact that my feelings have been repeatedly questioned by one person. If you can't relate to my point of view, that's fine. But the relentless...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-23-2013, 11:28 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Exactly. You can't. But it kind of seems like...

Exactly. You can't. But it kind of seems like you are...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-23-2013, 01:45 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Thank you, dakipode....

Thank you, dakipode. http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/smile.gif
Forum: Personal Growth   08-22-2013, 05:12 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Thank you so much for that support and...

Thank you so much for that support and understanding.
Forum: Personal Growth   08-22-2013, 04:23 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
And for me, I respectfully disagree.  There is...

And for me, I respectfully disagree.  There is no triad.  I'm thankful that closed adoption still exists for those who want it that way.  There is only a triad in open adoptions, which mine was,...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-22-2013, 03:04 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Queenjane, I have respect for your point of...

Queenjane,

I have respect for your point of view, so I would appreciate if, even though you don't understand, you would respect mine. You seem to be questioning my views an awful lot- are you...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-21-2013, 11:26 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
I was brought home at 2 days old, so I don't...

I was brought home at 2 days old, so I don't know if that has anything to do w it? No contact w BM at all in hospital.

I've never exhibited any of the issues associated w the so-called Primal...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-21-2013, 11:13 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Sure. I was always told that I was adopted, the...

Sure. I was always told that I was adopted, the communication was really open in our house. I asked questions as they occurred to me, but it was never anything beyond health history or country of...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-21-2013, 10:41 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
I agree that's probably the case for some, or...

I agree that's probably the case for some, or even maybe most? In my experience, and I'm only speaking for myself, I've never wanted to meet these people and have never had any curiosity beyond...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-21-2013, 09:57 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
You have to understand that when contact was...

You have to understand that when contact was made, these people went a little nuts. Invited me on vacation, drove 5 hours to my town on my birthday despite my asking them not to- then making sure I...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-21-2013, 09:54 AM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Oh no- not hostile at all. I told her thank you,...

Oh no- not hostile at all. I told her thank you, and that I appreciate what she did. I just don't want to "know" her.
Forum: Personal Growth   08-20-2013, 03:26 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
And as far as Facebook, it would feel so weird...

And as far as Facebook, it would feel so weird to have strangers looking at my pictures, or liking my posts. My FB is only close friends and family. These people are complete strangers and I don't...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-20-2013, 03:24 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Queenjane, I guess because they aren't my...

Queenjane,

I guess because they aren't my relatives, in my eyes? They ARE strangers. They aren't my family.

I guess to me, love makes a family. Genes are not really important to me- and...
Forum: Personal Growth   08-20-2013, 01:36 PM
Replies: 59
Views: 1,729
Posted By mom0810
Alison,   I would offer you a different...

Alison,
 
I would offer you a different perspective about your birth father.  He doesn't know you.  So how can he reject you?  He's not rejecting you.  
 
I think if you can have your bio mom in...
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