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Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   10-05-2013, 09:59 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 388
Posted By aricha
I know exactly what you are talking about, but I...

I know exactly what you are talking about, but I didn't realize it was "a thing" I just thought it was some weird language thing I'd noticed. I grew up with a full compliment of parents and...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   09-21-2013, 09:15 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 368
Posted By aricha
It sounds like maybe the two of you need to get...

It sounds like maybe the two of you need to get on the same page with some of your parenting roles. Many couples get to do this slowly, and often with a new baby there are some natural roles that...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   09-18-2013, 01:43 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 453
Posted By aricha
I am a step-mother to a now-11-year-old daughter...

I am a step-mother to a now-11-year-old daughter and have three biological children with her dad as well. I have been step-parenting her since she was a toddler. 
 
I will tell you that being a...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   09-13-2013, 08:45 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 348
Posted By aricha
My older two (one step and one bio, but that...

My older two (one step and one bio, but that doesn't really play into it) were upset this summer feeling like the younger kids got preferential treatment and that the got away with more and we...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   09-12-2013, 03:32 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 467
Posted By aricha
I am a step-mom who cared for a step-daughter...

I am a step-mom who cared for a step-daughter while it was my husband's parenting time. Our situation may be different, in that we had 50/50 custody, but maybe my perspective will still have some...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   08-02-2013, 09:50 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 530
Posted By aricha
I think it is a normal part of having a newborn,...

I think it is a normal part of having a newborn, like others said. Biology gives you that time when you live in a little bubble with the baby and nothing else seems to matter quite as much. It...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   07-15-2013, 06:16 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 696
Posted By aricha
It's also been my experience that the "left...

It's also been my experience that the "left behind " kids (i.e., the ones who live in the same house full-time) are the ones who struggle with that situation. We spend a lot of energy and effort...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   07-15-2013, 06:05 AM
Replies: 8
Views: 546
Posted By aricha
I find it does help my kids (especially my 8 and...

I find it does help my kids (especially my 8 and 10 year old) when I share with them the underlying feelings that I think might be contributing to bad behavior. There was a girl who was really...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   06-18-2013, 10:34 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 609
Posted By aricha
Maybe you could approach it from a different...

Maybe you could approach it from a different angle. Perhaps rather than getting him to stop, you can just get on the same page about discipline and guidance. My kids (who are younger than your...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   05-29-2013, 10:39 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 461
Posted By aricha
Re Mom eating lunch at school on your weeks: I...

Re Mom eating lunch at school on your weeks: I don't think your husband necessarily needs to put an end to lunches on your week. IMO, parents ought to be allowed to attend school events (whether...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   04-02-2013, 02:44 PM
Replies: 23
Views: 777
Posted By aricha
I have recently (after 4 kids and 10 years of...

I have recently (after 4 kids and 10 years of parenting) come to the realization that my kids can help out a lot more than I have been asking them to. If they asked me to make pancakes in the past,...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   04-02-2013, 02:29 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 907
Posted By aricha
You can't control what mom thinks or does, just...

You can't control what mom thinks or does, just what you do. My step-daughter's mom has said some awful stuff about me and the first couple years were the worst. The only thing I could control is...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   02-07-2013, 02:57 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 370
Posted By aricha
Here are two articles from a case in PA that...

Here are two articles from a case in PA that seem to set the precedent that if the parent agreed to private school in the past and voluntarily contributed to the cost, the court will likely require...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   02-07-2013, 01:46 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 406
Posted By aricha
Quote:Originally Posted by...

Quote:Originally Posted by SamiPolizzi http://www.mothering.com/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif (http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1373931/i-could-really-use-some-advice#post_17257067)

 I...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   02-07-2013, 01:34 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 370
Posted By aricha
I think a lot might depend on the law in your...

I think a lot might depend on the law in your state about child support, cost sharing, and if you have a "tie breaker" built in to your custody agreement if the two of you can't agree. In our state,...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   02-05-2013, 01:36 PM
Replies: 44
Views: 3,171
Posted By aricha
I don't think there is anything wrong with a...

I don't think there is anything wrong with a step-parent co-sleeping, especially since we are talking about co-sleeping with the other parent present most of the time. That said, it doesn't really...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   02-05-2013, 01:22 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 406
Posted By aricha
I don't think it is a bio-/non-bio issue but...

I don't think it is a bio-/non-bio issue but rather a parenting thing. I have friends who are in a similar situation-- mom "has to" do a lot of the caretaking jobs because the kids will refuse dad's...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   01-24-2013, 01:54 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 251
Posted By aricha
It might be helpful if there's somewhere she's...

It might be helpful if there's somewhere she's able to talk about it. It sounds like she's struggling with something, but it will be hard to help her if you don't know what it is. A good play...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   01-21-2013, 01:49 PM
Replies: 140
Views: 6,258
Posted By aricha
I haven't been through this situation, but I...

I haven't been through this situation, but I know someone who has. I have always admired her remarkable strength at being as angry as she needed to be at her husband, and still recognizing that this...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   01-16-2013, 11:07 AM
Replies: 19
Views: 715
Posted By aricha
Give it time. I started out not attending...

Give it time. I started out not attending anything that mom would go to. At some point I became an important person in my step-daughter's life and I started going to things that were open to anyone...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   01-15-2013, 08:28 PM
Replies: 19
Views: 715
Posted By aricha
We had a similar situation (mom took off with...

We had a similar situation (mom took off with baby, husband had to jump through her hoops until he could get a legal custody agreement in place). Once the agreement was in place and my husband had...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   01-12-2013, 07:40 AM
Replies: 21
Views: 993
Posted By aricha
VocalMinority gave a good description of how I...

VocalMinority gave a good description of how I handle it, as well. I count them all as my kids, and specify only if there is a reason to do so. When I do, I offer as little explanation as the...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   12-06-2012, 02:14 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 526
Posted By aricha
Please, please help him to get counseling. He is...

Please, please help him to get counseling. He is clearly showing you that he is trying to deal with too much and that he can't do it alone. He is struggling. He needs someone who can help him figure...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   11-25-2012, 08:36 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 683
Posted By aricha
Three-year-olds are definitely like that. My...

Three-year-olds are definitely like that. My three-year-old's parents (me and my husband!) are together, and some days he wants no one but Mommy, other days only Papa can make him smile. I think...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   11-13-2012, 08:38 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 696
Posted By aricha
I don't know the laws where you are, but in many...

I don't know the laws where you are, but in many places physical parenting time and legal custody are two different things. Even a parent who only parents their child every other weekend might have...
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