Mothering Forums - Search Results
Showing results 1 to 25 of 250
Search took 1.19 seconds.
Search: Keyword(s): ; Posts Made By: captain optimism
Forum: Single Parenting   07-13-2014, 08:08 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 483
Posted By captain optimism
I'm 48. My body looks 48, though people often...

I'm 48. My body looks 48, though people often think I'm younger when they look at my dopey face. I have huge boobs. I have stretch marks. I have no idea how my sexy times partner thinks my ladybits...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   07-10-2014, 02:03 PM
Replies: 87
Views: 2,609
Posted By captain optimism
After our earlier discussion of inadvertent...

After our earlier discussion of inadvertent rewards for bad behavior, I tried to remember what it was like when my son was little. It was really hard to recall. Have I been rewarding bad behavior?...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   07-06-2014, 08:47 PM
Replies: 87
Views: 2,609
Posted By captain optimism
This is going to sound too simplistic. I hope. I...

This is going to sound too simplistic. I hope. I stewed over it for a few days trying to think about it.

As adults, we like positive feedback. I would say that most adults don't like to be...
Forum: Parents as Partners   07-04-2014, 06:10 AM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,818
Posted By captain optimism
I think it did take courage, and that was why...

I think it did take courage, and that was why people read it and admired her. I do admire her. She stayed self-confident in a situation that was very bad. She was also confident that her husband...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-26-2014, 09:16 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
This is what I didn't like about using forms of...

This is what I didn't like about using forms of reinforcement with younger children, too. I think it undermines their intrinsic motivations. Plus, we know for sure that all three-year-olds lack...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-24-2014, 08:39 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
You mean here unintentional behavior mod, right? ...

You mean here unintentional behavior mod, right?

Obviously, there are always times when flexibility is good. I think what I've been objecting to here is your insistence that stating the rule is...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-24-2014, 05:26 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
But to me, this is basically the same thing is...

But to me, this is basically the same thing is worrying that you are rewarding bad behavior if you give a kid a hug to end a tantrum. The child is not a puppy. You don't train him by reinforcing good...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-24-2014, 05:09 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
Yes, there is a parenting philosophy that says...

Yes, there is a parenting philosophy that says not to manipulate the child's behavior with reward and punishment. It is the one espoused by Alfie Kohn in his book Unconditional Parenting. Kohn goes...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-22-2014, 08:51 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
That is not what you described in your post. You...

That is not what you described in your post. You didn't describe leaving the child to play by himself as part of an age-appropriate building of his inner resources. You said to stop reinforcing bad...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-22-2014, 08:39 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
Hey, if it's not broken, don't fix it! I look at...

Hey, if it's not broken, don't fix it! I look at the two moms of three-year-olds I see regularly and I think, "Holy cow, that was a hard age," and also, "Wow, they learn a lot at that age!" If she...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-22-2014, 08:04 AM
Replies: 70
Views: 1,812
Posted By captain optimism
I disagree with this. It's very behavioristic....

I disagree with this. It's very behavioristic. Children are young humans who are acquiring language. If you "ignore" them in the way you're describing, it's a form of punishment. It's basically a...
Forum: Gentle Discipline   06-22-2014, 07:27 AM
Replies: 14
Views: 497
Posted By captain optimism
I don't have the good fortune to have to manage...

I don't have the good fortune to have to manage all these siblings. It really sticks out to me that you say that this child did well in kindergarten and has trouble playing with his siblings at home....
Forum: Parents as Partners   06-02-2014, 10:54 AM
Replies: 30
Views: 1,818
Posted By captain optimism
She says in articles that her husband is OK with...

She says in articles that her husband is OK with it. I have to say, I'm appalled that she did this to her kids.

Also, someone recommended this book to me right after my husband left me. May I...
Forum: Single Parenting   05-22-2014, 12:00 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 385
Posted By captain optimism
Wow, I'm glad to hear that you're moving forward...

Wow, I'm glad to hear that you're moving forward on separation. I hope it will be a very good thing for everyone in your family. 
 
You could move all the children into your room but not into your...
Forum: Parents as Partners   05-01-2014, 12:45 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 739
Posted By captain optimism
Quote:Originally Posted by...

Quote:Originally Posted by sillysapling http://www.mothering.com/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif...
Forum: Parents as Partners   04-27-2014, 09:40 AM
Replies: 76
Views: 2,109
Posted By captain optimism
Quote:Originally Posted by...

Quote:Originally Posted by Pepin http://www.mothering.com/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif (http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1399961/husband-and-porn-issues-please-talk-to-me/60#post_17609557)
...
Forum: Parenting the Gifted Child   04-23-2014, 03:08 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 309
Posted By captain optimism
Oh, I was going to scan pages in order, because...

Oh, I was going to scan pages in order, because of the thickness of the book. I'm hoping he can use it in public school for enrichment. It would be nice if he didn't have to carry the huge book back...
Forum: Parenting the Gifted Child   04-13-2014, 12:34 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 309
Posted By captain optimism
One thing I think would help him stick with this...

One thing I think would help him stick with this book is if I can scan and print out the pages. I know that sounds like a very silly thing to say. I think being stuck for a long time in the...
Forum: Parenting the Gifted Child   04-13-2014, 04:41 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 309
Posted By captain optimism
I don't know yet whether it will be the answer,...

I don't know yet whether it will be the answer, but I'm still very excited about this new math book. My son's after school mentor found it for us. It's this Prealgebra...
Forum: Single Parenting   03-30-2014, 08:32 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 184
Posted By captain optimism
Congratulations! It's a new beginning for you...

Congratulations! It's a new beginning for you and your kids, and it sounds like maybe for your ex, too. But mainly I'm happy for you! 
Forum: Single Parenting   03-20-2014, 07:02 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 387
Posted By captain optimism
Quote:Originally Posted by...

Quote:Originally Posted by ChippyHippyMom http://www.mothering.com/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif (http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1399172/remaining-friends-with-stbxh#post_17593543)
 

@...
Forum: Single Parenting   03-20-2014, 06:17 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 387
Posted By captain optimism
We are still cordial. I wouldn't say we are good...

We are still cordial. I wouldn't say we are good friends, but we socialize with our old friends in groups and it goes OK. 
 
The thing is, when the relationship breaks up, you get to see what he...
Forum: Parents as Partners   03-20-2014, 09:48 AM
Replies: 16
Views: 739
Posted By captain optimism
I remember you! I remember your husband from a...

I remember you! I remember your husband from a previous thread. Ugh, I do not like that guy. He's too mean to you. 
 
I say,  start retraining as an engineer so that you can get into Green...
Forum: Parenting the Gifted Child   03-15-2014, 07:41 PM
Replies: 25
Views: 681
Posted By captain optimism
Quote:Originally Posted by...

Quote:Originally Posted by mckittre http://www.mothering.com/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif (http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1398560/whats-next-mom/20#post_17590070)
  Not sure, but I know...
Forum: Parenting the Gifted Child   03-13-2014, 08:38 PM
Replies: 25
Views: 681
Posted By captain optimism
Is it really a problem if the child learns math...

Is it really a problem if the child learns math out of order? Does it make a difference if they understand arithmetic too easily? I don't this math is like ballet, where it can damage the foot if...
Showing results 1 to 25 of 250

 
Forum Jump: