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Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   08-14-2014, 07:17 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 638
Posted By VocalMinority
Sorry! I never thought you meant that. ...

Sorry! I never thought you meant that.

There's no question DSS wanted to leave. There's also no question that if Mom knew we were coming to get him "early", she'd go to extremes to prevent it. ...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   08-13-2014, 09:13 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 638
Posted By VocalMinority
DSS is home and started school Tuesday. His mom...

DSS is home and started school Tuesday. His mom "bent over backward" with a typical Pyrrhic "compromise": she let him fly home Sunday night, despite wanting him to stay until Monday night. He...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   08-06-2014, 02:38 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 638
Posted By VocalMinority
You're right. It seems a sure thing at this...

You're right. It seems a sure thing at this point, that he's staying with us 'til college, because he wants to. I assume that's why Mom is starting to let him see a different side of her. She has...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   08-05-2014, 07:44 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 638
Posted By VocalMinority
Just the usual visit drama...

DSS's non-custodial, out of state mom now refuses to let him return from his summer visit, for high school Orientation/Picture Day at the end of this week. She will only send him back the night...
Forum: Parenting   08-04-2014, 08:00 PM
Replies: 24
Views: 792
Posted By VocalMinority
DH and I have approached it this way (which I...

DH and I have approached it this way (which I think is very appropriate):

1- You should do basic chores, appropriate to your age, simply because you live here. (But above-and-beyond chores, like...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   06-06-2014, 06:19 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 1,016
Posted By VocalMinority
Primarily, you should be concerned with the girls...

Primarily, you should be concerned with the girls not being miserable or embarrassed and their special events being about them, not about their parents' conflict. If you know their mom will create...
Forum: Single Parenting   06-02-2014, 07:37 AM
Replies: 15
Views: 956
Posted By VocalMinority
When you should and shouldn't listen to yourself...

I just wrote a long post and lost it, because I was suddenly logged out. Argh! Let me try to reproduce the gist of it...

Regarding abortion, you must listen to yourself. If you have one, you...
Forum: Preteens and Teens   05-27-2014, 08:45 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 1,095
Posted By VocalMinority
I was just reflecting on this issue today!  I've...

I was just reflecting on this issue today!  I've dealt with a somewhat exaggerated/magnified version of what you're going through, for years.  My twins sons are mildly-moderately Autistic.  They...
Forum: Single Parenting   05-22-2014, 09:07 PM
Replies: 15
Views: 575
Posted By VocalMinority
"He now is claiming that him and his ex-wife,...

"He now is claiming that him and his ex-wife, who he is "working things out with" will fight me for full custody if I take him to court for child support, and that they'll raise my daughter to call...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   05-19-2014, 06:08 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 415
Posted By VocalMinority
Thanks for the validation.     Perhaps the...

Thanks for the validation.  
 
Perhaps the most frustrating aspect of DSS's mom is her spin-doctoring.  I have extremely negative gut impressions of most things she does.  But she always spins...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   05-18-2014, 10:22 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 415
Posted By VocalMinority
DSS's mom and I are both Facebook friends with...

DSS's mom and I are both Facebook friends with one of DSS's friends, from preschool.  DSS's mom and I both used to know the friend's mom and, of course, the kid himself - at least, back when he...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   05-17-2014, 08:08 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 283
Posted By VocalMinority
My only (probably not very useful) experience is...

My only (probably not very useful) experience is that when my dad was a career Army officer years ago, at least once he was permitted to leave his family behind, serve a shorter tour, and be...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   05-01-2014, 09:42 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 207
Posted By VocalMinority
I'm tearing up...  So happy for you, Mom!

I'm tearing up...  So happy for you, Mom!
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   05-01-2014, 09:12 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 407
Posted By VocalMinority
Well, wonders never cease!   Originally, XW...

Well, wonders never cease!
 
Originally, XW requested these 8 weeks.  DH told her what DSS wanted to do this summer and how it conflicted with her dates.  She vehemently refused to budge.  Then...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   04-30-2014, 09:05 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 407
Posted By VocalMinority
When my DSS was 6 and his mom (my DH's XW) was...

When my DSS was 6 and his mom (my DH's XW) was preparing to move across the country, she wanted DSS to testify.  She told him the court was required, by law, to consider his wishes (true).  Of...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   04-28-2014, 06:56 AM
Replies: 4
Views: 395
Posted By VocalMinority
Consider reading Stepmonster...

Consider reading Stepmonster...
Forum: Single Parenting   03-22-2014, 07:25 PM
Replies: 14
Views: 418
Posted By VocalMinority
My ex and I have maintained a great relationship...

My ex and I have maintained a great relationship - and it is very good for our kids.  So, there's hope.  It's definitely possible.  Over time, dumping the pressures of sharing a home, finances, a...
Forum: Single Parenting   03-21-2014, 03:06 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 364
Posted By VocalMinority
#1 - Was he in jail because he was *convicted*...

#1 - Was he in jail because he was *convicted* of threatening your lives?  Or for some other reason?
 
#2 - Start by requesting an emergency protective order (i.e., one that's effective...
Forum: Breastfeeding   03-11-2014, 03:49 PM
Replies: 107
Views: 8,445
Posted By VocalMinority
"Go to sleep in your nursing bra, with a cabbage...

"Go to sleep in your nursing bra, with a cabbage leaf spread out in each cup.  When you wake up, you'll no longer be engorged and in pain."
 
Silly as it sounded, it was TRUE.  (And you know I was...
Forum: Toddler Health   03-06-2014, 03:33 AM
Replies: 20
Views: 12,722
Posted By VocalMinority
Skimming over other comments, I note you've been...

Skimming over other comments, I note you've been given some advice about not treating fevers.  It's true that treating children's fevers under ~105 is a cultural thing:  Americans have tended to do...
Forum: Single Parenting   03-04-2014, 05:20 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 616
Posted By VocalMinority
If you are insightful enough about yourself, and...

If you are insightful enough about yourself, and concerned enough for your daughter, to be able to take responsibility for the fact that your behavior and instability are harming her...then it's...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   03-03-2014, 07:51 AM
Replies: 6
Views: 438
Posted By VocalMinority
http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/grouphu...

http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/grouphug.gif  I'm so sorry you're going through this!  
 
Our family has struggled with similar - though not identical - details.  My husband's ex tried...
Forum: Blended and Step Family Parenting   02-22-2014, 02:57 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 518
Posted By VocalMinority
If the parents don't agree, the first good place...

If the parents don't agree, the first good place to start is usually the court orders and state law/guidelines.
 
Here, there's an emphasis on parenting time being more than just "a visit"; and...
Forum: Single Parenting   02-18-2014, 10:20 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 283
Posted By VocalMinority
Yes, some people will always call you Mrs. Ex,...

Yes, some people will always call you Mrs. Ex, if your children have his last name.
 
No, you don't have to explain to anyone, unless you want to.  
 
I'm basically in your situation.  For...
Forum: Single Parenting   02-17-2014, 05:34 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 367
Posted By VocalMinority
Quote:Originally Posted by...

Quote:Originally Posted by DragonSlayer http://www.mothering.com/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif...
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