You may remember controversial vlogger Tasha Maile, the mama who was under fire for opening up about having sex while she was dream feeding her baby. People were (and still are) outraged, saying she involved her baby in a sex act. Tasha updated her life in another YouTube video, sharing that she’s working her way back to joint custody with her ex-husband. Just recently, though, she’s uploaded more videos again and showing off her new child, Love.
Tasha Maile is a Youtuber who puts out some…interesting videos. While she claims she shares about her vegan lifestyle, mindfulness and attachment parenting strategies (yay!), many of her videos are a little… out there. She recognizes this, often starting videos telling her 561,000 subscribers (yep, that many) that she’s going to try and “stay on topic.”
Last year, that wasn’t easy for her to do as she defended herself after admitting she breastfed her son while having sex.
Claiming that nursing was not a sexual act, but an act of necessity so that she was able to feed her child and still be intimate with her partner, she claimed she was not being abusive and involving her son in a sexual act as some were loudly declaring.
Many applauded Maile for her admission, saying that nursing absolutely was not a sexual act, and she shouldn’t have been attacked for simply feeding her baby, regardless of what else was going on — sex included. Tasha’s video channel often details the importance of normalizing breastfeeding, tandem breastfeeding and extended breastfeeding. Those things we can get on board with.
Others, however, were not quite as supportive; in fact, many who watched both the video with the British talk show and her videos on both her YouTube channel and her Instagram account claimed that she should be prosecuted for criminal activity — that of engaging her child in a sexual act.
On the talk show This Morning With Phil and Holly, Maile justified her nursing decisions and claimed she felt no issue existed with her stance on having sex while nursing her son. That said, an online petition was started to bring actual legal charges against her, with the claim that her admission to ‘sex from behind, or something like that,’ while her baby was nursing and sleeping on her chest was a form of pornography.
Maile defended herself by claiming that her baby didn’t even know what was going on, and certainly wasn’t cognizant enough to recognize that his parents were having sex.
Experts believe that most children don’t really form long-lasting memories that can actually be recalled until they’re about nine-months-old. Additionally, most pediatricians now are in favor of keeping babies in their parents’ room until the baby is at least a year old, and if that’s the case, many babies around the world are most likely exposed to their parents’ intimate moments.
Additionally, when we parent by attachment principles, our children are often with us on the regular, and Maile claims that this parenting style is exactly why she had sex how she did, when she could—likening it to nursing a baby while in the shower or on the toilet, even, if the baby was hungry.
As we updated last year, 2017 and 2018 held many changes for Maile, as she was no longer in full custody of her sons.
Turns out that Maile admitted to being involved with amateur adult films in which she makes solo session videos as well as custom-designed pieces that are sold on the site ClipsForSale. She admitted that she makes anywhere from $30 to $400 a clip, depending on what the viewer is looking for.
As well, she admitted that she does indeed use her breasts to make money, making ‘pumping videos’ for ‘lactation fetishists’ (people who have fetishes for breastfeeding women) and she says that doing so doesn’t sexualize breastfeeding. She calls ‘lactation’ a very different thing from breastfeeding and that people can have fetishes about lactation without involving children.
In the sexual sessions she is part of, she says she never has children in the room, and never involves them, but did admit that if a ‘client’ wants a fetish video, she does produce or pump milk on camera for them (for money). She says that breasts can be sexual too, and used during sexual sessions, calling it human nature.
And here is pretty much where she tends to lose even her strongest supporters, saying that even if her children are not involved in the fetish acts, the mere sexualization she brings to breastfeeding by ‘pumping’ for money negates any support they could give to her for trying to ‘normalize’ breastfeeding. Critics say that there’s nothing ‘normal’ about those with sexual lactation fetishes, as sex and breastfeeding are different concepts entirely, but Maile says that she has nothing against using breasts and milk sexually for her videos.
In January of 2018, Maile posted a video about the allegations of her using her breasts as sexual money producers, masturbating while her kids were around, and shared that a detective with an organization that investigates internet crimes against children had come to her home in October of 2017 because she’d been ‘bullied’ and ‘harassed’ by her ex (and the children’s father).
She said that the investigator told her that she was part of a federal investigation that questioned whether there was sexual criminal activity online. Some of the allegations include people uploading her videos where she nurses her children on porn sites and she says that she has no control over that. Other allegations were against her having ‘family beds’ that include ‘multiple men’ and she says that couldn’t be further from the truth.
She also shared that her behaviors and actions were part of an investigation that child protection services were conducting, and that her ex and his girlfriend came to Hawaii, stole the children and took them back to Utah, and she can’t fund getting them back.
Maile claims her ex’s custody grant was a result of unfair allegations and lies. In the hour-long video, she shared text messages, recordings of conversations she held with other investigators who seemed to be partial to her, and that she would be fighting for her children. In May, she started a petition to get her children back and in the last the six months, she’s posted several videos in which she asks her viewers to help her get custody of her children back.
But a later video, released on the 28th of June, 2018 — showed her in Hawaii, with her children, and her message was titled “Update on my kids and custody/Court.” In this message, her boys were with her, running around enjoying watermelon and a gorgeous day.
Both boys (ages 3-years-old and 6-years-old) nursed in the video, while she shared that it’s really important for parents to work together and that co-parenting with 50-50 custody should be the most important focus on the children. She said that the actual custody hearing was upcoming and that she believed the ultimate best outcome for that custody involves good communication with honest intentions that are true and honest.
In effect, this Tasha seemed optimistic and hopeful about shared custody with her ex-husband, as well as the opportunity to continue parenting her children as she wants. She did not share any outcomes of any cases against her, nor did she share whether or not those cases against her had even been resolved. Videos from what appears to be a new account suggest that her sons Soul and Josiah are still not with her but her youngest son, Love, is.
To that effect, she’s uploaded several videos in the last month and it would seem on both her ‘old’ and new accounts. In her old, she is nursing and asks people for donations because she’s a single mom and their father is not helping ‘for reasons she doesn’t understand.’ She also offers her services as a sleep coach or life coach, and that she accepts donations because she’d love to make her videos allow her to stay with her kids without having to work outside of the home. In her new, she’s waving fake $100 bills and telling subscribers if they want to make more money, they should buy pretend money, pretend it’s real and their subconscious will help create the abundance. Not.even.kidding.
And now, a current update shows a very confusing situation. One video talks about her third baby, Love, who she shares is not the child of her first two sons’ father. She shares that the father, Skyler, and she were not together anymore because she wanted to ‘be the female’ and not so masculine, but that there were no hard feelings. At the time of the video, she was 39 weeks pregnant and said Skyler was there for the birth.
And speaking of the birth, she also uploaded a video that shared details about her ‘unassisted’ birth of Love. In previous videos, she’d recommended books about unassisted birth, and in the video she recommended a book about unassisted birth. We’re fans of her wanting natural home birth options and sharing the normalization of breastfeeding and what she calls ‘full-term feeding.’
And while Google might tell you all about breastfeeding a full-term newborn, that’s not what Maile is talking about. In pictures she’s tagged #fulltermfeeding, she is feeding her toddler. We’re all about that, and hope she’s an encouragement for others.
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#fulltermbreastfeeding @ 2 step beach. Just got out of the water from swimming with over 50 magical dolphins 🐬 blissed out and blessed up 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🧜🏼♀️🐬💫🏝👌🏽✨🥰🤱🏽a sister and I were speaking about our energy when Bfing our keikis. How when we can feel #calm and peace our babies also feel it, same when we feel frustrated for this and that, remembering this, reminding our selves to breathe deep and stay calm, even after they want to feed for the 50th time that day. #lol We love our babies and want the best for them. #humankind we are# KIND and nice at our core, when we are BEING our true authentic selves. This is ❤️ we are ❤️ we are one. One ❤️ #wearelovesvoice #beach #beachbabes #beachwear #beaches #beachbody #bikini
Then it’s hard not to get lost in the rabbit hole of what else Maile has posted, where she’s posted it and what is real or not. Some photos that definitely show the beauty of breastfeeding one’s child also can give fuel to the firestorm that was her ‘sexualizing breastfeeding.’ Even in her ‘new YouTube account’ that has nearly 820k subscribers, she has a section that solicits people to donate $25 if they are more interested in her more sensual and uncensored side.
Yes, mothers can be nursing mothers and sensual and uncensored and they can definitely compartmentalize between those parts of themselves.
But seriously. Spend a few minutes (or hours, sadly) checking out the videos she makes, the things she says and the vibe she gives off and think about how much of a case she can make for what was initially a valid issue.
Actually, maybe you don’t want to, though, because there’s stuff you’ll see that you can’t ever unsee. Trust me.
Photo: Tasha Maile