By Ashley Lefrak for Brain, Child: The Magazine for Thinking Mothers
Walk your toddler back to bed for the twenty-seventh time.
Start reading on-line parent forums about what to do when a toddler keeps leaving his room after bedtime.
Read about people claiming to have solved this problem through the purchase of special sheets and fun tents! Read posts accusing these parents of either lying or having simple children. Read the sheet/tent parents telling the other parents to shut it about their kids’ intelligence.
Walk your child back to bed.
Note the number of people publicly losing their minds online due to powerlessness in the face of toddlers. Commend yourself for not losing yours. Worry briefly about how you’d know if your mind were unraveling.
Read about those for whom calmly walking their child back to bed worked after two nights. Curse them loudly into the computer.
Read one woman’s post that says, “They grow up so fast cherish this time!” Admire her briefly. Accuse her of lacking an inner life.