Giving Birth: The Dad's Side - Mothering Forums

 
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#1 of 10 Old 08-22-2017, 07:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Giving Birth: The Dad's Side

Hi guys, here's a little about giving birth from the view of the dad:

"Watching your partner go through that much pain is genuinely horrific. For us, right at the latter stages of the pushing stage, Isabelle brought the cord down first, something called cord prolapse, and something that we had no idea was actually a dangerous thing.

Within seconds I was pushing the emergency button and we were suddenly being rushed down to theatre with urgency. I had no idea what was going on. I merely trailed behind wondering what to do. I was dragged along by one of the midwives, and rammed into the elevator to make our way down to theatre. The next thing I know my partner is being surrounded by doctors, midwives, and god knows who else as I sat off to the side feeling like I shouldn’t even be there. A million things rushed through my head, and I really, really just wanted to get out.

But I had no choice. My wife needed me more than I needed to be alone. I stood there holding her hand, and trying desperately to hold back tears. The staff kept telling me that things were ok, clearly seeing my concern, but they just really needed to get the baby out. What came next will always stick with me. Due to the urgency, there was little thought given to pain relief. Yes, they injected my wife with a local anaesthetic ready for the episiotomy, but there was no time for it to take effect.

Instead, I simply watched, or rather listened, as they cut my wife and tried to get her to push. Eventually, they resorted to the ventouse (not going to lie, I looked that up as I was going to use the term “suction cup thing”), and finally they managed to get the baby to come out. After that moment, my wife’s face changed in a matter of seconds from agony to extreme relief. Just like that, there was no more pain, no more screams, at least not from her, all of it was replaced with happiness. And maybe some soreness, I imagine things were still a little tender."

Didn't want the full article on here as it just looks really long, the rest of it is on my blog here: https://isablog.co.uk/2017/08/15/giv...the-dads-side/

Any other dads with stories of childbirth?

Last edited by Isabloguk; 12-31-2017 at 09:31 PM.
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#2 of 10 Old 11-05-2017, 02:14 AM
 
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My husband fainted a couple of seconds after our son got out. I can't really blame him. I was 12 hours in labor/ He didnt eat and drink, didn't sleep/ The tiredness and nervousness plus the excitement (its our first son) overwhelmed him.
The thing is, we always pay attention to the woman who gives birth and rightly so. But we tend to forget the the husbands are involved and they face difficulties as well.
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#3 of 10 Old 11-05-2017, 05:52 AM
 
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Congratulations.

What kind of childbirth class did you take that you and your wife did not know what a prolapsed cord was?

The purpose of the childbirth class should be to educate the parents very well about what to expect and what can happen. Most childbirth classes now are mere PR ads for the hospital. Parents should know what can happen, why, and what the hospital would do about it. Prolapsed cords happen - more than the hospital would want the parents to know which is why they did not tell you. The course I had, nearly 40 years ago, was more like a midwifery 101.

Knowledge is power. Use it. Then you will not feel useless.

"Vaccines are like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get - acute hemorrhagic edema of infancy, allergies, anaphylaxis, asthma, autoimmune disease, diabetes, eczema, petit/gran mal seizures, fibromyalgia, Henoch-Schonlein purpua, Dravet's Syndrome, Retts Syndrome, Sweet's Syndrome, Hughes Syndrome, encephalitis, speech delay, tics, neurological damage, coma, ADEM, ADHD, AFP, ASIA, CFS, CRPS, GBS, ITP, JPA, JRA, LGS, LKS, MS, OMS, ORS, PANDAS, PANS, PINTANDS, POF, POTS, RA, SIDS, SJS, SLE, SPD, SUDS, TPI, the disease one is being vaccinated against, or death."

Paraphrased from "Forrest Gump".

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#4 of 10 Old 11-05-2017, 09:26 AM
 
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How do we know they went to classes? I know I didn't because my son was born early, it was an emergency birth. I think going to classes is optional anyway? I think a lot of new parents just believe nothing bad will happen to them and are very optimistic not considering how crazy things can turn and very quickly... I'm a prepare for the worst kind of person but even I was totally blindsided by having such an early baby and so many health complications after.
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#5 of 10 Old 12-31-2017, 09:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by applejuice View Post
Congratulations.

What kind of childbirth class did you take that you and your wife did not know what a prolapsed cord was?

The purpose of the childbirth class should be to educate the parents very well about what to expect and what can happen. Most childbirth classes now are mere PR ads for the hospital. Parents should know what can happen, why, and what the hospital would do about it. Prolapsed cords happen - more than the hospital would want the parents to know which is why they did not tell you. The course I had, nearly 40 years ago, was more like a midwifery 101.

Knowledge is power. Use it. Then you will not feel useless.
It was supposed to be parenting class, but really it was a coffee morning type thing. They basically let you ask whatever you wanted to ask, and then went over some basics like doing a nappy. So if you didn't know about something you couldn't exactly bring it up.
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#6 of 10 Old 01-21-2018, 11:03 PM
 
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Such new and interesting replies!!
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#7 of 10 Old 01-29-2018, 08:08 AM
 
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Hello ladies.Pregnancy can still seem like it is all about the mom, but it is so important for dads to be part of the experience. Of course, the physical aspects of pregnancy are experienced only by the mom, but there is more to pregnancy than the physical part. There is also emotional preparation that happens during pregnancy which is important for dads to be part of.The third trimester is an exciting time, as baby's birth gets closer. Its a time for men to prepare for a birth support role and their first hours as dads.My husband is an incredible man, partner, and father. He lights up when the kids run into our room and devote as much time as he can to playing and spending time with all of us.great part in it.Good luck all.
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#8 of 10 Old 07-18-2018, 09:58 PM
 
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Father should be present at birth. Sometimes very basic needs of woman in labor can't be understood by medical staff. It is not less sophisticated than a surgical operation, only without anaesthesia
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#9 of 10 Old 07-22-2018, 07:59 PM
 
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When my husband has seen our child for the first time, he cried. It was really a precious moment.
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#10 of 10 Old 07-22-2020, 12:54 PM
 
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I won't ever forget my husband's face when he first say our baby)
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