I'm 36 weeks pregnant, and I just quit smoking 2 weeks ago.
I have been a closet smoker for a long time. I only smoke when I am away on short business trips 2 or 3 times a month, but I often binge smoke during those times. I am also planning a homebirth, but the reality of what I have been doing is really starting to hit home. I'm wondering if HB is a stupid choice for me. If I have ruined it for myself and my baby.
Please hold off on the judgement...I can promise you that there is nothing that you can say that I haven't said to myself. I feel like a horrible mother to my baby, horrible partner to by DH, and horrible client to my MW. I'm posting here because I have created this dilemma for myself and need some clarity on what I should do.
My pregnancy has been great and uneventful. Placenta and cord looked great at the 20 week ultrasound, blood pressure is very good, iron levels lowish but within normal limits (and I have been supplementing since it was last checked), my weight gain is normal (up about 40 pounds) and fundal height has been right on target at every visit. I have kept active and fit, and my baby seems to be just as active in the belly as its older brother was. Stupidly, I smoked at the same pace throughout that pregnancy as well, which resulted in a fantastic natural birth (birth center) and perfectly healthy kid (apgars were 8 and 9, just shy of 8lbs). The only complication was a moderate pp hemorrhage that was managed with IV pitocin and methergen. He was born at exactly 42 weeks, and yes his placenta did look old and calcified.
I understand that smoking is a risk factor for postpartum hemorrhage, and this is what I am most concerned about. My midwife (DEM) will have herbs and IM pitocin available, and does all the other usual things such as putting babe to breast, uterine massage, etc. Homebirth midwives are not legally able to carry meds in my state, so she reserves use of IM pitocin whenever possible. I do not know what herbs she uses nor do I know anything about their effectiveness.
That is my background. For homebirthers, would you risk yourself out? For midwives, would you risk me out? I need some clarity. I can't seem to look at this objectively. I don't want to be blase and naively assume that everything will be all roses and tulips...but I do not want to make a decision based on fear, either. I am so kicking myself for letting it go this far. I'll spare you the excuses and whys and wherefores. Just know that I am sorry.
I had not intended to have another ultrasound, but I am considering it now just to see how badly I've damaged this baby's placenta and to check the baby's growth. Midwives - is there any information from an ultrasound at this stage that would factor into your decision if I were your client?
Thanks for listening..