Still? - Mothering Forums
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 6 Old 03-02-2007, 01:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
Potty Diva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 6,576
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
2 months before Kailey's 5th birthday we weaned. I thought % was old enough to be nursing and she went along with it (though not entirely happy about it). Well, since then (maybe a few months after we stopped) she has asked to nu-nu. She asks maybe once every week, even up until 2 days ago-she asked again. So, even after a year of not nursing she still asks too and remembers what nu-nu's provide- although we do talk about our bodies and how women produce milk, etc, so that could just be from our chats and not actual memory.

What should I do?

We already hug and snuggle in place of nu-nu-ing, but this obviously isn't distracting her.

Ideas?
Potty Diva is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 of 6 Old 03-02-2007, 05:58 AM
 
ulla's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 414
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Sit her down and ask her why she continues to ask to nurse. Maybe it's about being nostalgic about her babyhood.

I would also take this opportunity to have a conversation with her about growing up. Explain to her gently but directly that it is a normal part of life and growing up to let go of the past and move on, even when it involves things that are near and dear to us, and sometimes hanging onto the past can hold us back and prevent us from being happy in the here and now.
Your daughter is 6 so she is old enough to understand these concepts.

You don't mention this, but is she isolated from other children? Does she spend most of her time with you? At this age she probably needs more contact with girls her age. Does she have a best friend that she sees on a daily or near daily basis? Encourage her to get involved in Brownies or team sports.
ulla is offline  
#3 of 6 Old 03-02-2007, 10:05 AM - Thread Starter
 
Potty Diva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 6,576
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks for responding Ulla.

She is in kindergarten and attends an afterschool care program. She is also involved in dance and has several friends that she spends time with. She is Miss Independant all the way.

She has her own things that she is involved in and loves.

I attend college full time with my last class ending at 3:45. I pick her up around five so she's in care for about 2 hours.

We play together when we get home. On weekends she plays with neighbor children and sometimes stays the night at a friends house. We have get togethers with friends and their moms for afternoons (on weekends) at the park. We are pretty normal functioning people

She just came in and I asked hr why she still wanted to nu-nu and at first she didn't want to answer then said she was kidding. I said it was ok that she wanted to I was just curious as to why. She then said because she misses it and it makes her feel snuggly. Aw...
Potty Diva is offline  
 
#4 of 6 Old 03-02-2007, 10:08 AM - Thread Starter
 
Potty Diva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 6,576
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
ya know, really it has only been a year and she was nearly 5 when we stop so the memory is probably really fresh in her mind.

Also, I'm not comfortable with the idea that at 6 she should be somehow separate from me for extended periods of time. She is a child and while she is able to come and go when SHE wants I am not going to force separation, which I think is quite unnatural.
Potty Diva is offline  
#5 of 6 Old 03-02-2007, 12:24 PM
 
momuveight2B's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 1,375
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My twins asked a lot when they were six too. One was really persistant so one day while I was nursing baby sister I let him nurse too. That was the end of it. I don't really remember much more about it but it seemed once he knew that I was willing to share that time with him he lost the need.
You may find that if you agree that she will find that things are not the same, she won't remember how to latch, the milk is gone or whatever and then that will be the end of it.
I also used to tease them a bit and tell them I was afraid of their big teeth because by that time they were losing some and getting adult teeth. We used to have a good laugh over that. I told them they would have to get their milk from the fridge and that the baby didn't want to share. One of the twins used to punch the other in the nose as a baby because he didn't want anyone else on my lap while he was nursing. The kids all talk about this so they joked about that too that if one were to try to take over the baby might punch them in the nose.

ETA: It does sound like dd has really spread her wings and is away from you and very busy. Maybe what she is really trying to say is that she still needs to be babied at times. A lot of kids this age still like their blankies, teddies and even pacifiers. She may be needing a retreat into an earlier stage of development and she remembers how safe and comforting nursing was.
momuveight2B is offline  
#6 of 6 Old 03-02-2007, 12:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
Potty Diva's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 6,576
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
So, I should just have another child and that will take care of it

If it comes up again (which I am sure it will) I will offer, but haven't for some reason (thought it would be odd, unnatural- thanks society!).

Thanks, I think that makes tons of sense.
Potty Diva is offline  
Reply


User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Online Users: 4,966

8 members and 4,958 guests
Deborah , Hyacinthe , idler , KerriB , lauritagoddess , narbeesh5 , verticalscope
Most users ever online was 21,860, 06-22-2018 at 09:45 PM.