Not the kind of mom I want to be... - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 37 Old 06-18-2006, 01:44 AM
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Just wanted to offer hugs and support mama! Hang in there you are a wonderful mama really!!!! Oh and the Moby wrap is a great idea! I loooovvvveee my Moby! No back aches!
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#32 of 37 Old 06-18-2006, 07:20 AM
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I'm not from you DDC, but I"m a BTDT mom. I didn't have the health issues you do (although, I personally had a raging yeast infection that took months to control, thankfully, it didn't turn into thrush), I had tons of guilt and resentment.

It took a long time for me to figure it all out. I was totally alone, too. No friends. No playgroup. I did go to two LLL meetings. One was at a house so filthy, my feet were sticking to the carpet as I walked on it. And the next meeting was hosted by a woman who chained smoked throughout the meeting, even while nursing her baby. Needless to say, I never went back.

The best advice I have is forget the guilt. Do what you have to to get through this. Forget the guilt. What good is it going to do for you to stand true to your parenting philosophy if it is damaging your relationship with your baby? I too had lofty ideals of baby wearing, happily nursing at the beach (we lived in Hawaii), being all happy and joy joy. And it DID happen. But it took time.

My babies hate the sling, HATE all carriers for that matter, until they are about 5 or 6 mos. My daughter hardly ever slept. She was awake and fussy if I wasn't walking her around and stimulating her every minute of the day. Eventually, I stuck her in a swing (GASP) in front of pictures of baby faces and cranked the Mozart. I even purchased those dreadful Baby Einstein DVDs (GASP GASP GASP) and she would watch them just long enough for me to shower.

I carried around a lot of guilt from those first 3 mos or so. But eventually things work out better and you both get into a groove and get to know one anohther better and figure things out. It's a relationship like any other. It takes time to iron out the wrinkles. It'll happen. Do what you can to make it happen in a happy, not stressful way.

By the way, what about books on tape or movies. Personally, I am not a movie fan so I figured out how to nurse while reading fairly quickly. But then I progressed to nursing while surfing the web. I still do that. It is second only to snuggled up on bed. NOw that my nursling is 2.5, though, the computer is more likely than the bed. He just doesn't snuggle so much any more.

Anyway, you will be fine and you will parent the way you want to, it just may take detours along the way. Which is fine.
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#33 of 37 Old 06-18-2006, 08:51 AM - Thread Starter
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After a couple of decent days, nursing has taken a turn for the worse.
See here:

I don't know what to do anymore.
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#34 of 37 Old 06-20-2006, 11:04 PM
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Can you pump until your nipples are healed and then try again?
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#35 of 37 Old 06-21-2006, 03:25 AM
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I hear ya' sister....I have noticed that now that baby is 6 weeks old, I am starting to be able to rely on a rythme for taking care of him. I do have to say that even though this is true, we still have our days! It sounds like you are being pro-active and that is all you can do. Just keep your AP objectives in mind, and practice as you go. I know I have done some things that I NEVER thought I's partly about trial and error and what works for you and baby......I am throwing all my books away!

I am so sorry you are so stressed out. Do you have any friends around? Also, I bet you could host a little potluck-playgroup to get people to come to you?
Walking is great, and yes, your body will get stronger every day until it's back to normal.

I wish you all the best from one new mom to another.
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#36 of 37 Old 06-22-2006, 04:05 PM
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You are discribing ME, 6 years ago. I got the cracked nipples and thrush soooo bad. I had these terrible pimple like things all over my chest! I did the Violet stuff and diflucan. I got a terrible reaction to the diflucan! First off, did you know that stuff stays in your system for 3 days! So if you are taking it every day, it is building up and up in your body. The thing is you probably are not allergic to, you just are taking too much at once!
The Violet stuff did nothing for me, except turn everything I touched, purple. I was in tears and stuck on vaction when all this happened. It was a nightmare!
I had thrush for 2 years with my dd and got it again with my ds.
I now use a cream and only this cream to keep the thrush under control. The cream is a compound that need to be made my a "real" pharmacist. I would try looking on the web or asking you obif they know what it is. This cream is the BEST!!!! You leave it on even when you nurse. Every time I feel a little sore, I rub some on for a few days and it keeps the thrush from coming back.

Just my 2cents! Good luck!
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#37 of 37 Old 06-30-2006, 03:38 PM
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NYC VEG!! i miss you!! i hope things are better!! ive been asking around on the vegfamily about you!!

Waldorf mama to Autumn DD 9/05 and my Spring DD 4/08 Winter baby due 2/11
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