Confrontation with eldest son - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 5 Old 07-15-2016, 06:02 AM - Thread Starter
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Confrontation with eldest son

I am currently having an issue with my eldest son Stash. I was doing the laundry and I walked into his room, he didn't notice me. I looked at his computer and he was looking at pornographic cartoon images of prepubescent girls and boys. I was a little shocked at this due to the content.

I have never had the chance to give him a talk and with his father not around I didn't know if I should. I was wondering if I should talk to him on this matter or let him try figure him self out.
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#2 of 5 Old 07-16-2016, 06:02 AM
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It is unclear from your post what age your son is or where you are located (pertaining to the laws about child pornography where you are).

If you are the only parent and you've not had a discussion with your son about sexual behavior and safe sex, as well as legalities around viewing, then the simple answer is 'yes', you need to be in a consistent dialogue with him about that.

He does need to know that in certain places, possessing or sending pornographic images of actual children is a crime.

If he is drawn to that age individual, that is a bigger issue that would require specialized treatment.

Again, not knowing his age, it is hard to say whether he is curious, naive, exploring, or should 'know better' about this.
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#3 of 5 Old 07-16-2016, 01:16 PM
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Internet gave access for this kind of thing. I think I know what he is up too. Be a mother, just find the right words, time and mood to say thing to your son.
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#4 of 5 Old 07-16-2016, 04:01 PM
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Another post about a tween/teen boy and his poor clueless single mother.....

You know, even if the dad was still around, its okay to ask questions on a forum....
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#5 of 5 Old 07-16-2016, 10:10 PM
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Eh, some of what I told my kids of both genders was that porn was often more of fetish leaning varieties and that most of it tends to leave out the tender feelings that can develop between folks before and after sex acts. Porn itself is not the destroyer but rather a steady diet of it does affect one's real life expectations and assumptions. Instead I gave my kids The Joy of Sex to read and that turned out to be quite popular with them. Yes, it is hetero-normal but that's a place to start. If they had shown inklings to any other direction, I'd have asked my adult friends for guidance on the matter.

Don't barge in on him again. You are embarrassing both of you. Just talk to him about why this shouldn't be a steady thing he watches. Maybe he's just trying to figure out the mechanics.
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