Do you struggle to find ways to communication with your teen? - Mothering Forums
 
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#1 of 7 Old 05-01-2017, 02:16 PM - Thread Starter
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Do you struggle to find ways to communication with your teen?

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"We love our teens and like to think that as involved parents, we know all we need to know about them. But then we try to have a conversation. And it doesn’t go well. It’s frustrating — when they’re small children, they won’t stop talking to you; when they become teenagers, your conversational gambit is met with awkward shrugs." 22 Conversation Starters for Honest Discussions With Your Teen
Do you struggle to find ways to communication with your teen?
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#2 of 7 Old 05-05-2017, 08:42 PM
 
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I think I am already having this problem with my son and he's only 10. I think maybe I am not very approachable when he wants to talk about something. I'm not sure how to change that perception.
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#3 of 7 Old 05-11-2017, 04:48 AM
 
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yes i have ... i've been told off by my eldest for saying "Hello" and asking how her day went the minute she passes the door returning from high school; she explained that i MUST wait for a bit before presuming she's available to talk with me .... quite often ... she's not necessarily in a better mood later on (and i worry i'm going to forget to check there are no papers i need to sign or information i should know ...).

Basically, the best time for talking with my eldest teenager is when walking somewhere to do whatever (= not face to face nor "on purpose") AND when SHE has something to ask me anyway or something she wants to tell me ... only THEN ... am i able to "place in an acceptable way to her" whatever topic i had in mind to bring up ...

My second teen is a boy, communication is different ... not the same subjects to start with & he's not so oppositional to me anyway ....

The youngest is not yet a teen ... but copies her elder sister way of talking to me generally ... and i find that HARD !

Am trying not to over-react ... but not always succeeding ... it is hard to find the right balance (= i expected more respect, .... but i still want to be approachable ... so cannot always react as angry as i feel ...)
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#4 of 7 Old 05-11-2017, 09:29 AM
 
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There are a couple journals on amazon that can help with this issue. One for girls and one for boys. Sometimes writing is better and less threatening than talking and it can be done in the privacy of the kids room etc.

Here are the links

https://www.amazon.com/Just-Between-...ughter+journal


https://www.amazon.com/Between-Mom-M...CFWD3WGABMF5JX
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#5 of 7 Old 05-24-2017, 01:56 PM
 
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thank you for the suggestion !!!
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#6 of 7 Old 09-04-2017, 07:47 PM
 
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Sometimes, I have this problem with my daughter. I think maybe I'm not trustworthy enough to be friends with her. I'm not sure how to change that perception.
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#7 of 7 Old 09-04-2017, 08:54 PM
 
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I sometimes do. But I used to asked her about music even I don't like music much. I used to pretend that I love the music.
So i used to open up about music if I want to ask something about that I'm interested to know, but before that, I have to
ask something related to music before she opens up about my concerns. And then there our conversations going to smooth.

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