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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My dd just turned one on the 10th and has lost almost all interest in nursing <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> . I'm lucky if I can get her to nurse twice a day! Last night she skipped her second nursing and so I decided to pump....I only got 2 ounces! I have like no milk. I'm eating oatmeal, drinking mothers milk tea, and pumping 2-3 times a day (I'm going to try to get that up to 3-4 times a day). I'm so depressed about this. I firmly believe in extended nursing and can't bear the thought of my dd weaning so early. How can I share my views and beliefs with other mothers if I can't even get through it myself? any adivice or support would be much appreciated <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="innocent"> .<br><br>
pak(pumping at keyboard <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> )
 

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Hello-<br><br>
Well, I haven't been in this situation, but I will try to offer some suggestions anyway.<br><br>
Is your dd eating a lot of meals during the day? I would cut back on the solids and also on drinks that she is receiving from cups or bottles.<br>
When it is mealtime offer the breast first, before offering other foods.<br><br>
Then perhaps this weekend you two can spend lots of time cuddling in bed, skin to skin, so that the breasts are in sight and instantly available when she might show an interest. Does she sleep in your bed at night?<br><br>
Some babies go on nursing strikes for various reasons - and we may never find out why. Just keep offering the breast, keep pumping when you can, and try not to get discouraged and stress too much, as that will affect your supply as well.<br><br>
If she does end up weaning anyway, just take comfort in the fact that you nursed her as long as SHE wanted and that it really was her decision to wean herself.
 

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short post, squirmy toddler:<br><br>
no other sucking- no bottles, no sippies, no pacifiers<br>
no other milk (formula, cow, soy, expressed breast [for right now at least], rice etc)<br>
offer a lot. like every hour or two<br>
go topless when possible<br>
cosleep topless<br>
take baths together<br><br>
treat it like a nursing strike. 1 yr olds don't wean.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
-Angela
 

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no offense but i don't really like the advice you've gotten. if we as ap parents believe in following our children's needs and listening to them, then i don't think your daughter should be manipulated, in any way, into nursing. if she is truly ready to wean (which i have my doubts about) i think this should be accepted. the benefit is after all hers. i know that it may be hard for you, it would be for me too, but i think you should allow her the space she is telling you she needs!
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I don't feel like my dd is anywhere ready to wean herself. She doesn't even weight 20lbs yet and is rather small. I think that she really needs the extra nutrition extended breastfeeding can give her. I believe that she wants to nurse sometimes, but the lack of milk, or the fact that she only gets 2 ounces at a time is frusterating for her. Almost like it's just not worth the effort. I'm trying to bring up my supply, but it's slow going. After 2 days of really trying hard for it I woke up this morning with no improvement and I just wanted to cry. I know these things take time, but the more time this is taking, the less my dd is wanting her ninnies.<br><br>
In the hospital she had some problems and I was to tired and uneducated to say no to all there procautionary measures. She was under a jaundice light for the first 2-4 days of her life. We gave her a pacifier to help soothe her when she wasn't breastfeeding. (They also hooked her up to an IV and antibiotic <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: , but that's not really relevant for this matter). Anyways, she still has a pacifier (only at night and in the car) and I don't see how I can take that away from her just yet. Also, she HATES cosleeping <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"> . I had her sleep in her crib for nap times when turned about 7 or 8 months (no CIO of course) so that she wouldn't crawl off the bed. Well after this happened she decided that she needed her own "space" and would no longer let mommy cuddle her. I have tried several times for her to sleep with me, but even if I can get her to sleep she wakes up within 15-30 minutes crawling on top of me, thrashing and crying <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> . As soon as we get her back to sleep and in her crib she will sleep the whole night through. This was very hard for me, many sleepless night...<br><br>
She doesn't get any other form of milk, unless I give her some EBM in a sippy and that only happen a few times in the past few days. She does get a sippy cup with water in it at meal times though. I would like to cut down of solids of water, but I don't see how she would get any nutrition right now. I have NO milk. She tries and then give up. It's a horrible cycle.<br><br>
With all my ap plans nothing is turning out quite like I wanted it to, besides wearing her, breastfeeding is all I have left and it's very important to me....
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> mama. Hang in there! Okay- squirmy toddler is nursing now, so I can type a bit more.<br><br>
First off- you're right- she needs to nurse more. Biologically humans do not wean at 1 year old. They wouldn't survive.<br><br>
My biggest suggestion would be to take about 3 days and concentrate on the nursing issue. Spend ALL your time with her- as much topless as possible. Offer to nurse often. Drink TONS of water. Eat as much oatmeal as you can stomach. Take warm baths together. ALWAYS nurse before meals. Don't feed her- only give her food she can feed herself (slows them down also they're really only ready for as much as they can feed themselves) I would try to cut down on the pacifier and encourage her to nurse instead. Every suck on the pacifier is a suck that's not stimulating your supply. Try to nap with her. Does she nurse laying down?<br><br>
You have more milk than you think you do and your breasts will keep producing as long as she keeps sucking.<br><br>
good luck!<br><br>
-Angela
 

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Alegna's right about the topless thing. Ds is nearly 11 months and if he see's em, they're fair game! I found that for me (though it may be a psychological thing) that organic rolled oats do better for my milk than the quick cooking. Also, the pump is NOT an accurate indicator. If it were, then my ds would only be getting an ounce or so per feed! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Nurse more. one yr olds need milk-- they would starve if they weaned. Healhty babes won't starve themselves. Many i yr olds are too busy to nurse in the day, which is why they nurse so much at night. I would take her into bed with you and let her suckle on and off all night. That will bring up your supply in a way a pump can't.
 

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What is your napping situation? Until you get your supply back up I would really encourage you to nurse her down for naps, during naps, and waking up from naps. Also, really try to have her nurse before meals.<br><br>
You have gotten some great advice. 10-15 months is a very common time to have a "down" period for babies. For some that can mean a premature weaning, for others that simply means dropping to "only" 25 times a day. BUT, as a pp mentioned, children simply are not biologically ready to wean at 1 year.<br><br>
A lot of people, though, find they cannot pump (even if their supply is fine) as their nursling gets older.<br><br>
Good luck and keep us posted. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>alegna</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">My biggest suggestion would be to take about 3 days and concentrate on the nursing issue. Spend ALL your time with her- as much topless as possible. Offer to nurse often. Drink TONS of water. Eat as much oatmeal as you can stomach. Take warm baths together. ALWAYS nurse before meals. Don't feed her- only give her food she can feed herself (slows them down also they're really only ready for as much as they can feed themselves) I would try to cut down on the pacifier and encourage her to nurse instead. Every suck on the pacifier is a suck that's not stimulating your supply. Try to nap with her. Does she nurse laying down?<br><br>
You have more milk than you think you do and your breasts will keep producing as long as she keeps sucking.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"> That is almost exactly would have suggested. I can't offer any brilliant advice, but wanted to offer a big <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> because you sound so stressed. And try to relax a little bit, because stress can affect milk supply. Good luck!
 

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all the advice her sounds good - I agree with concentrating on nursing - don't do anything else for a few days except offer, offer offer. Go to bed with her and nurse and nurse and drink tons of water all the time.<br>
she is too young to self wean - something else must be going on
 

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Big <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"> to you mama.<br><br>
I agree with most of the pps, except for the one that disagrees with the rest (something about manipulation)! It seems that your daughter has started to become dependent on other things, other than you. I am sure you can remedy this situation- try to cut down on pacifier use and offer her the breast instead. Offer the breast before meals. Do not offer her so much food and offer her just water from a proper cup (not sippy) after meals only. The topless thing is great and the baths and nursing her to sleep in your bed and then moving her to a cot? Mattress on the floor? Carry her in a sling if you have one rather than a pushchair.<br><br>
As for your supply- it will pick up very quickly, if it is low. Try to pump more often- do not let your breasts get full (this slows down production), if this really is the problem. I imagine that is the other way around- because your daughter has reduced her time at the breast, you are producing only the required amount (not much).<br><br>
Maybe stop offering expressed milk- you want her back on the breast and she is one now, so does not require the nutrition (in the strict sense of the word). What does everyone else think about this? I think she is refusing the breast, not the milk from the breast. Just express and keep it. Maybe, maybe, maybe...<br><br>
Good luck to you!!
 

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Hang in there, I just got over this!<br><br>
I learned a couple of things: My ds was not wanting to nurse as often and lots of feedings was making it quick and short and he was not getting lots of good milk (my letdowns slowed way down)! After getting your supply back up, offer at very laid back times, and not so often, maybe dd would be more interested. My ds went from 10-12 nursings a day to 4-5. He just has better things to do!<br><br>
My let down was very slow and he didn't have the patience to wait. So, I nuse him after naps every time, and wake him once at 10:30 to get the fourth feeding in. He seems more willing to suck when just waking, he no longer nurses to sleep becuase it takes so long to let down.<br><br>
Also to keep his attention when he is not interested in waiting for the let down, we face something he likes to watch: the dog playing outside through the window, or sesame street sometimes.<br><br>
I naively thought that after the first months of breastfeeding and getting my ds off a nipple shield that it would be smooth sailing, but that did not happen! I was at tears trying to walk and nurse and do everything to keep him at the breast long enough for the milk to come flowing! They will get used to the changes in mama's milk and be happy nursing babies! Good luck and keep it up, your baby is not done yet!
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2"><br><br>
I would treat this as a nursing strike, not "child led weaning." It's tough because your baby wants to sleep by herself with a paci rather than cosleep and nurse, and you want to respect her desires, but at the same time, she does have a physical need for breastmilk and the pacifier is interfering with that.<br><br>
Please don't think you're a "failure at AP" if things don't go exactly the way you'd planned. You've still got 17+ years of Gentle Discipline ahead of you!
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>starlein26</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">no offense but i don't really like the advice you've gotten. if we as ap parents believe in following our children's needs and listening to them, then i don't think your daughter should be manipulated, in any way, into nursing. if she is truly ready to wean (which i have my doubts about) i think this should be accepted. the benefit is after all hers. i know that it may be hard for you, it would be for me too, but i think you should allow her the space she is telling you she needs!</div>
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I TOTALLY agree! This doesn't sound *child led* at all...
 

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If my little guy went on a strike at 1yr, then I too would try very hard to get back on track with nursing. I know that continuing to nurse would be the healthiest choice and as a mother I would do everything I could to encourage it. I do not see it as manipulation at all.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
I just wanted to say thank you for all the advice that I have recieved thus far. It's really nice having someone to talk to about this that doesn't just say "She's weaning herself, just let her stop". I am 100% sure that she is not ready to wean and that she's just frustrated and distracted or something similar. She loves to nurse when I catch her at the right time and have lots of milk. My supply is doing a bit better. There's not milk all the time, but she's been nursing about 3 times a day. Also, she's been getting a new tooth so that has helped her in wanting to nurse more often. I was planning on getting some fenugreek but I read that it can worsen asthma and I really can't risk that.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">I found that for me (though it may be a psychological thing) that organic rolled oats do better for my milk than the quick cooking</td>
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It's not all in your head. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"> The more processed the oatmeal, the less GLA available. <a href="http://www.netrition.com/mccanns_oats_page.html" target="_blank">Buy steel cut oats</a>.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">Oatmeal is the only food that naturally contains GLA (gamma linolenic acid) an essential fatty acid critical to the body's production of the favorable eicosanoids (PGE1 - prostaglandins). Eating steel-cut oats (very slow cooking) four times a week will provide you with a good supply of GLA.</td>
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ahem.... oatmeal is the only food <i>besides breastmilk</i>..... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">
 
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