[dovey]

We are having a rough time with our 1 yr. old dd's screaming. If I don't pick her up or give her whatever she wants instantly, she screams at the top of her lungs (especially when I'm not holding her at the time).<br><br>
This morning, her brother (3 yo) asked to go in the jumping swing, so I put him in it. And then the instant the baby heard him jumping she crawled over to him and started screaming at him because she wanted a turn. I know it may be hard for her to understand the idea of taking turns at this point in her young life, but the screaming is so difficult for me and the rest of the family to deal with. She is difficult to distract once she really wants something specific. It's especially difficult at dinnertime, whenever I want to take a shower and at bedtime when my partner and I are trying to get the kids ready to sleep (brushing teeth, pjs, etc), and I'm not quite ready to nurse her.<br><br>
What are some possible solutions? More holding? More slinging? Explanations about taking turns? Is she old enough to learn that I need some space sometimes?

 

[PreggieUBA2C]

I suppose it depends on what she needs- more slinging, etc... When our 2nd and 3rd were that age, I did pre-emtive distraction. I figured out what activities would be interesting to ds and initiated it for him before his brother(s) became interested, as much as possible. If I had a swing, I would put him in it first thing; I would take out the favourite book and give it to the yr old first, and whatever was of current interest, I would do that with. It didn't upset the older dc usually because the one yr old would not often spend too great a time with the activity and I know we may have unusually patient children, so this might not work for you.<br><br>
Anyway, I try to present the favourites of each child to them before the others get to them and then they're fine for the rest of the day even when their brothers take over their favourite things for a while. It became easier to redirect once that part of the day was over. That period didn't last very long with each of ours either; they quickly learned that they will have an opportunity to play with everything available that day, so they relaxed with other things while they waited their turn. Our 16 month old has just recently accepted the taking turns concept, but I wouldn't expect/enforce this with a one yr old; it's probably too young.<br><br>
Gosh, this is so convoluted... sorry... dc running in circles around me <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">