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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Please help me because I am completely out of ideas on this one.<br><br>
DS2 is nearly 14 months old. Since early December he has been waking at 2 or 3 in the morning and staying awake for about 2 hours. I am quite exhausted, as is DH who shares the night time parenting. Anyhow, DS is perfectly content to be rocked in the dark for two hours - but he will not be put down, will not go to sleep in our bed (we don't cosleep due to being very light sleepers and widely varying schedules). He will nurse and drink some yogurt/milk smoothy which I use to supplement nursing at this stage. He sleeps ok during other parts of the night and takes 1-2 naps (usually one at this stage, we are transitioning) daily for a total of 1 1/2 - 3 hours of naps.<br><br>
There doesn't seem to be any relationship that I can determine between this pattern and :<br>
1. Bedtime<br>
2. How much dinner he ate<br>
3. Who does the night time care<br>
4. How much he nurses and/or drinks<br>
5. Diaper condition (e.g. wet or dry)<br>
6. Room temp or jammies<br>
7. Teething<br><br>
I am at a complete loss. I am also getting quite sleep deprived and would like to find a way to start breaking this cycle. I have never gotten up and turned on the light, played, etc. to give the impression that these are things that we do in the middle of the night. The focus as always been on trying to get him back to sleep.<br><br>
What else should I try???
 

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My dd went through a similar phase at the same age, except that unless you got up with her she would scream bloody murder for hours.<br><br>
We just decided it was easier to get up with her, and took turns hanging out with her in the family room during the wee hours until she fell asleep again or was at least willing to go back to bed.<br><br>
It did not train her or teach her that she could get up in the middle of the night all the time . . . it was a phase and while I don't remember how long it lasted, she's almost 24 mos now and it almost never happens anymore.<br><br>
This too shall pass!
 

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You could try getting up with him but for us that just made it all worse. He had major melt down after melt down.<br><br>
For us (we co-sleep though) I just keep repeating 'its sleepy time', and offer nursing and back rubs. And usually within 15 minutes of being wide awake he goes back to sleep.<br><br>
Have you tried adding a single bed next to your bed? That way baby still has his own space.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thank you for the thoughts ladies.<br><br>
I do often put him in bed with me at 3am but he is still awake for 2 hours no matter what. At least I am laying down (or, sitting up propped up on pillows with him on my chest in bed) but other than that it hasn't accomplished anything.<br><br><br>
We do the dark the "its sleepy time" the rocking, etc. and he is still awake for 2 hours. If it was only 15 minutes I would consider his waking quite normal..... As it is I am rocking, nursing, feeding, rubbing him for 2+ hours nightly. I find myself close to falling out of the rocking chair or dropping him because I am so exhausted.<br><br>
This is why I am mystified. It isn't a matter of failing to try to get him back to sleep. It's that nothing I've tried has worked.<br><br>
I do need to keep in mind that this is a stage - its just been 3 months of very little sleep and that is really wearing me down.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"><br><br>
That is exhausting. I've had this situation before, and here are my suggestions.<br><br>
Drop the second nap during the day. Get him down for the first nap around 11:00 am, and don't let him sleep past 4:00.<br><br>
Don't put him to bed before 8:00 or after 9:00. Wake him up in the morning by 6:00 a.m. Get him outside for at least an hour before his morning nap.<br><br>
When he wakes up in the night, don't talk to him, don't feed him other than to nurse him, and don't turn the light on.<br><br>
This is what has worked for my kids when they fall into that pattern. I think increasing exercise however possible also helps.
 

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Is he busy during the day? Do you get out every day to work his little legs?<br><br>
At that age my children were only napping once for maybe an hour or less during the day. They have all been night owls though and gone to bed about 10-11ish and woken between 9am and 10 or even 11.<br><br>
My dd2 wakes and stays awake in the night once in a while and it truly sucks. It happens when her brain is over busy and she sits there next to me spouting new words one after the other in between shaking my head to make me listen to her. Lying in bed next to a wide a wake toddler is too frustrating for me so couple of times I have brought her downstairs and let her potter while I dozed on the sofa and eventually she has come an laid down by me and I've taken us both back to bed.<br><br>
If I were you I would try to increase his daily activity by walking places during the day even if it takes you ages to get anywhere, playing ball outside maybe or playing rushing around games at home or rolling about the room on a duvet or cushions if you can't get out.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>natensarah</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/10690056"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Drop the second nap during the day. Get him down for the first nap around 11:00 am, and don't let him sleep past 4:00.<br><br>
Don't put him to bed before 8:00 or after 9:00. Wake him up in the morning by 6:00 a.m. Get him outside for at least an hour before his morning nap.<br><br>
When he wakes up in the night, don't talk to him, don't feed him other than to nurse him, and don't turn the light on.</div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/nod.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="nod"><br><br>
All of this!<br><br>
Make sure he is getting lots of fresh air and physical activity during the day - I know it's hard if the weather is cold where you are, but it does wonders for sleep!
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Good ideas! I am going to try to keep pushing his nap back to 12:00 and limit him to one nap. It has been hard because he is quite tired often in the later afternoon and tends to lose it by 6pm without an afternoon nap. Lately he has been taking only one 90-120 minute nap starting around 11:00. That hasn't helped the nighttime waking much, but maybe in another 3 or 4 months it will work itself out.<br><br>
I will try later bedtime. Its hard because he is soooooo tired by 6:00. I do think we can aim for 7:30 or 8:00 with a little juggling.<br><br>
Thank you again for all the thoughts!<br><br>
Oh yeah - it is warm here and he gets TONS of physical activity. Part of the reason he is taking an early nap is that I take him every morning to the gym and he exhausts himself playing for 2 hours. He also get a lot of outside play in the afternoon (another 2 hours typically).
 
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