[calebsmama03]

DS had been down to maybe 4-5 nursing sessions per day - wake up, pre-nap, post nap and night, with an occasional mid morning nursing. He started walking 3 weeks ago and has since been CONSTANTLY wanting to nurse! I can't get dressed without him freaking out and he's constantly lifting up my shirt. I am really dedicated to letting him self-wean, and I am not ready to wean yet, but nursing 9-10 times a day again is exhausting me!! If I don't "give in" he whines, cries or sreams until I do - there is no distracting him.

ANyone else have this happen with an older babe/toddler? How did you deal with it? Any thoughts to help keep me sane?

 

[HelloKitty]

Any chance you are pregnant???? My son has been doing this ever since we conceived this current pregnancy...

 

[chickiebabe]

DS did a very similar thing when he was about same age. It lasted a few weeks then tapered down again. As I recall he was teething his first molars then. By the time I was frustrated enough to think that I wanted him to wean, he naturally started to decrease number and time of his nursing sessions. (As an aside, I'm far to lazy to do anything but let him wean himslef - he's far to devoted to his "nursies") He's now 21 months and back to short sporadic nursing except for nighttime (still loves to nurse to sleep and a few times at night). As with so many things, bear through this because it will change - likely for the better!

Amy

 

[Nate]

Quote:

Originally Posted by chickiebabe I'm far to lazy to do anything but let him wean himslef - he's far to devoted to his "nursies")

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That is SO true! Weaning just seems like so much work...

My thought is molars, too. Either that or something else developmental going on. Not much help, I know.

 

[tracymom]

Gosh, it's hard to remember but I think DS did something similar. He ebbed and flowed many times during our nursing time till he self-weaned at 3 1/2.

 

[Tiacsophno]

Both kids increased their nursing frequencies btwn 17-20 months. Frequency also increased during teething, colds, developmental milestones, etc. Often I don't find out what the trigger is until week after the fact. Just know that it probably won't last forever.

 

[Parker'smommy]

THis is VERY common. In Dr. Sears The Baby Book, he talks about toddlers nursing more than they did as newborns!!! And it was totally true for us. Around the 18 - 24 month span, Dr. Sears says to expect an increase in nursing. THe reasons are varied but I think it has to do with your little one realizing that if he asks ( new verbal skills) his wonderful mama gives him his milk!!! They also realize that the toys, games, whatever will still be there when they come back from nursing. Before, they couldnt break away from playing to nurse. Too busy. Also, its a developmental stage. They want to know that it is still there and available, I also found out that if I distracted ds too much when he wanted to nurse at this age, when he finally got me to sit down and nurse he would camp out for an hour!!!!!

My ds is 28 months old and around 25 months he started to cut down to maybe 6 nursings a day ( I don't know exactly, we don't nurse on a schedule or set times of day) but thats my guess. Now that Im pregnant he is nursing more than ever!!!!!

 

[*Erin*]

chiming in with a ditto

my dd did the same thing. it's quite common for a toddler to kick up the nursing during a growth/cognitive spurt, to kick up your milk supply, during times of teething, and also while trying to fight off infection. totally normal!

 

[calebsmama03]

Thanks for all the reassurances! He has been teething *FOREVER*. It takes hima long time to get teeth through, and he just finished getting molars and upper eyes, now is working on lower eyes and incisor. Maybe that is it...

So my next question is, do you "give in" every time he lifts up your shirt or try to limit somewhat? Limiting (and the ensuing crying) seems to go against everything I'm trying to work for (gentle parenting wise) but I also believe to some extent in operant conditioning and think that if I give him nursing just to keep him from freaking out, somehow I'll be teaching him that he can tantrum to get what he wants

Thoughts???

 

[chickiebabe]

If nursing is terribly inconvenient (for example,we are just about to leave the house or we're in public (he's a VERY acrobatic nursling)), I'll try to distract or postpone him. I find we're about 50-50 on the delaying - 1/2 the time he seems to forget he wanted to nurse and we never get around to it. If he *insists* then we go ahead and nurse. I try not to force the issue too much and try to keep him from getting to the real tantrum stage. If we're home I tend to let him nurse when he asks. This seems to work for me both practically and philosophically. He learns that sometimes you have to delay gratification but that ultimately if he really needs to nurse, I'm there for him. I figure that when he isn't distracted from it, nursing is truly meeting an important need for him (that he can't put into words). In your situation, it sound very much like he *needs* to nurse right now and that if you let him he'll get through this much more smoothly. I can say that it's helped me to be proactive - I try to get dressed quite literally while his back is turned and try to get clothes on after showers very quickly. If you can anticipate some of the most frustrating triggers and minimize the "prompts" for him to want to nurse, that may help save you sanity!

Amy

 

[Embee]

Just wanted to chime in... I found the first half of the second year to be quite the BF marathon. *whew* He was milestoning every minute (walking, talking, discovering everything) and I think really needed extra support during this big, amazing, beautiful time! Also, the teething of course. He was getting his eye teeth at this time and they were the worst (only to be followed by second year molars of course). Before that, teeting wasn't much an issue for us so it surprised me, but apparently it's normal--the eye teeth come in at such a place that they can be extra sensitive. I found that nursing on demand at this time was key in keeping the harmony in our home.

Hang in there!

 

[DecemberSun]

My DS is 18 months old, and he just started nursing a LOT more than usual, too. Teething has always been hard on him, but I think right now it has to do with making sure his "bobby" is still there for him whenever he needs it. I do try to distract him, but he does the same thing as your baby- lifts up my shirt, asks for it, whines, cries, kicks, screams. It's always easier to just "give in". He's very addicted to sucking, so his "bobby" is his pacifier. I'd like to have another baby soon, and I'm not too interested in tandem nursing, so I'm hoping we see a light at the end of the tunnel soon! I have faith that eventually he'll be secure enough to cut down on nursing. I guess I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone, I'm in the same boat as you!

 

[lizziejean]

I've nursed two through this stage now and they both became marathon nursers in the 18-24 month range. I thought with my dd that it was because her little brother came along (with all that yummy fresh milk) when she was 18 mos... but little brother is doing it too. I agree with previous posters that it's all about the stress of learning and growing so much, so fast... they need support and comfort... plus of course great-tasting nutrition, especially if they have a cold or something. And let's not forget those molars.

As for the delaying, I do test a little bit to see if he really needs to nurse, or whether he's just had the idea because he saw me sitting down... it doesn't seem to have hurt him or our nursing relationship to say no sometimes, and then give in if he has a fit... sometimes he will accept a sippy cup of water instead if he was just thirsty, sometimes he just seems to say 'oh well' and wander off again, sometimes as I say he insists, and I nurse him. So all in all it adds up to about 6-8 times a day, always both sides (god forbid he should give up after only one!) He's going to be 2 in a week or so.

 

[eminer]

Quote:

Originally Posted by calebsmama03 Limiting (and the ensuing crying) seems to go against everything I'm trying to work for (gentle parenting wise) but I also believe to some extent in operant conditioning and think that if I give him nursing just to keep him from freaking out, somehow I'll be teaching him that he can tantrum to get what he wants Thoughts???

So don't make him throw a tantrum. You will know the moment at which ds is ready for you to delay or even tell him you can't nurse right now, and it *will* come eventually. He will be able to talk about it and understand time a little. 15 mos is a little young for a lot of babies. (They don't know that according to their pediatrician, they should be weaning now.)

 

[Mommy To Baby Roni]

Quote:

So my next question is, do you "give in" every time he lifts up your shirt or try to limit somewhat? Limiting (and the ensuing crying) seems to go against everything I'm trying to work for (gentle parenting wise) but I also believe to some extent in operant conditioning and think that if I give him nursing just to keep him from freaking out, somehow I'll be teaching him that he can tantrum to get what he wants

Have you tried teaching him to sign? Lifting of the shirt and tantrums is where we have limits. If DD starts lifting my shirt and saying "noh", I gently remind her to sign, not pull on my shirt. I refuse her until she stops lifting my shirt and starts signing (asking nicely

). At 15 mos, I don't think it's about getting what he wants, but about having some sort of need.

 

[calebsmama03]

Thanks for all the ideas and suggestions. I have been working on signs with him, and I always do the sign for "milk" when we sit down to nurse. WHen he lifts my shirt I ask him "Do you want to nurse?" while signing for milk. He hasn't of yet done the sign back, but just this week started signing for "more" and "all done" so hopefully that will come soon.

It's reassuring to know this is a typical stage, even if my ped doesn't think so (but that's a b*^%$ for another post, LOL!)