[moominmamma]

Oh yeah, I noticed. I didn't respond initially, because I was pretty sure it was one of *those* posts. But the discussion that evolved was interesting.

Miranda

 

[contactmaya]

Actually I believe that everyone's comfort in the home should be considered. Don't really have much else to say. We just disagree.

We agree that everyone's comfort in the home should be considered. I think that point was covered and is not relevant to the issue of the cps you raised.

We dont agree that the cps should be involved, or that in principle, should be considered, if it means bringing shame or secrecy into the issue. Im still not sure what you meant by 'thought about", since you didnt expand on that point.

 

[homeschoolingmama]

Thought about means considered. I feel it should be considered. I responded to the probably not real OP. This is my opinion and you have a different one. That is ok. I don't feel like debating the way I feel on it. It is good to get different points of view. Forums are great for that.

ETA: And if I really wanted to debate this topic, I would have told everyone what I really thought of this discussion. lol I chose to speak respectfully and just discuss what I would think about and consider.

 

[silchas]

Thanks for all your replies. Sorry I have not gotten back here sooner, but I've been really busy.

The update is that we've decided to allow her to be a nudist. We told her on Nov. 1st. It's been almost a month now, and honestly it already has become the norm. I almost don't notice, except for being being on top of making sure the curtains are drawn in the evening. I'm a little envious of how comfortable she is naked. I've tried going nude a couple of times in the last few weeks, and I'm just too self conscious. The boys show no interest in nudity, of course, we'd let them if they wanted.

The only issue is what to do when company comes over. We don't want any mixed messages, to either her or the boys. This issue is at the fore front, because we're having Thanksgiving dinner at our house. We told her that she needs to wear a nice outfit for dinner, and she agreed that it would be inappropriate to be naked when guests arrive, and at the dinner table. We comprimised by telling her that after dinner, when every one is either watching football or playing in the rec room, she is welcome to take off her clothes. Between my husband and I we have a huge family, so it's been a lot of work to them what to expect. We've told them all that basically, we now have a "clothing optional" home, although, Sara is the only one who takes advantage. They've all been unbelievably supportive and open minded.

We still need to talk to other people, like the parents of her brothers friends. The experience with our family is encouraging though, and so are most of the opinions here. As far as CPS is concerned, we talked to our lawer, and there are no laws against family members being nude in the home. Where her friends, and most of all her brothers friends are concerned, we need to be careful. We know Sara has been naked in front of her friends and her brothers friends around the pool already. We never allowed it, but she would just jump in the pool naked out of habit. I told her many times to put on a swimsuit because there we're young boys present. She's never been shy about nudity around her own friends, she's always naked when they're in her room, or the rec room. I don't see that being a problem though.

Concerns about my husband are silly, although I understand your concern. He's a very laid back, open minded guy. I laugh though, when I see him turning the thermostat down in the evening. Passive aggressive? Yes, but funny.

Thanks, Jess

 

[blessedwithboys]

:eyesroll

 

[contactmaya]

I think she is a serious poster, raising an interesting question, Am i being naive? Other than that, i couldnt agree more about bringing back the old mdc...

 

[Daddy222]

Nothing wrong with being naked and anybody who thinks differently is only brainwashed by society/parents/peers etc. in thinking there is.
In our house, clothing is optional (when it is only family at home of course).
Why should we be afraid to see our own family naked?

 

[Robert F]

My 15 yo daughter asked us if she could be a nudist. We should have seen this coming. I'll try to give a little history, and keep it brief.

First she has two younger brothers. 8 and 12.

The summer before this last one. She was 13 almost 14, she wanted to swim in the pool without her swimsuit. We told her that would be okay as long as only our family was around. She would just wear a towel, go out swim, and play by the pool. I also noticed she started sleeping naked, and hanging out in her room naked.

This summer past, the first day we opened the pool, she came down stairs, and strolled through the house naked. She would even come inside for lunch naked, and I always have to ask her to cover up. Then she would just put on a long tee shirt.

The pool is closed for the winter. She's been very casual about being naked. She come downstairs every morning for breakfast without any clothes on. After school she does homework in her room...of course sans clothes. She makes no effort to cover up if she goes to the rest room, or come downstairs for a drink.

We had a talk to her about it the other night. She said she wants to be a nudist. She asked if we would allow her be nude at home, all the time.

My husband and I have been talking it over. He says we should let her, if it doesn't bother her, it doesn't bother him.
I'm about to give in, but there will be no turning back. I guess I'm just a bit uptight.

So, I though I would post this question here, and see what other parent thought. Without have to bring it up to our friends and family. Thanks so much.

Jess.

First and formost, educate yourself as much as you can about this subject. Then talk to your daughter about it. Have a family discussion. Let her know, as with everything else, there is a time and a place for nudity. If it's only family, I don't see a problem. Sounds like her brothers have already seen her nude. However, as someone brought up earlier, when her brothers bring friends over, she should cover up. For that matter, whenever anybody else comes over, she should cover up. Consider going to a nudist resort. There are many family friendly places.

Sounds like you won't be able to stop her, but maybe you can support her, within limits of the home.

 

[Robert F]

Thanks for all your replies. Sorry I have not gotten back here sooner, but I've been really busy.

The update is that we've decided to allow her to be a nudist. We told her on Nov. 1st. It's been almost a month now, and honestly it already has become the norm. I almost don't notice, except for being being on top of making sure the curtains are drawn in the evening. I'm a little envious of how comfortable she is naked. I've tried going nude a couple of times in the last few weeks, and I'm just too self conscious. The boys show no interest in nudity, of course, we'd let them if they wanted.

The only issue is what to do when company comes over. We don't want any mixed messages, to either her or the boys. This issue is at the fore front, because we're having Thanksgiving dinner at our house. We told her that she needs to wear a nice outfit for dinner, and she agreed that it would be inappropriate to be naked when guests arrive, and at the dinner table. We comprimised by telling her that after dinner, when every one is either watching football or playing in the rec room, she is welcome to take off her clothes. Between my husband and I we have a huge family, so it's been a lot of work to them what to expect. We've told them all that basically, we now have a "clothing optional" home, although, Sara is the only one who takes advantage. They've all been unbelievably supportive and open minded.

We still need to talk to other people, like the parents of her brothers friends. The experience with our family is encouraging though, and so are most of the opinions here. As far as CPS is concerned, we talked to our lawer, and there are no laws against family members being nude in the home. Where her friends, and most of all her brothers friends are concerned, we need to be careful. We know Sara has been naked in front of her friends and her brothers friends around the pool already. We never allowed it, but she would just jump in the pool naked out of habit. I told her many times to put on a swimsuit because there we're young boys present. She's never been shy about nudity around her own friends, she's always naked when they're in her room, or the rec room. I don't see that being a problem though.

Concerns about my husband are silly, although I understand your concern. He's a very laid back, open minded guy. I laugh though, when I see him turning the thermostat down in the evening. Passive aggressive? Yes, but funny.

Thanks, Jess

sounds like you have a handle on the situation. Most of the time anyway. I forgot to mention last time that my family and I are nudists. We do cover up when other people are over, or when we go out. But our house is clothing optional, and we spend most of our indoor time sans clothing. Outside chores are done with clothing on of course. We do respect the views of the society we life in. We have one boy, 15, and one girl, 12.

As for your own issues, try a clothing optional resort for a family vacation. Each of you can wear as much, or as little, clothing as you wish. I think you will become as comfortable with your own body, as she is with hers, over enough time.

I still think you should be careful with non family guests. Other people are still brainwashed by society. We seem to be comfortable with violence, but not nudity, just look and mass media, tv and video games.

We would be better off if social, nin sexual, nudity was accepted, and maas violence was not.

 

[MangaX]

I wonder ...

I think it's great that you've been so open to the lifestyle that you're daughter so desperately wanted; however, I can't help but wonder if this acceptance would have been treated differently had it been one of your sons instead.

Just curious as to your thoughts on this.

 

[Labertine]

It's hard for me to believe the level of acceptance in this thread. Maybe I'm old school but she should absolutely not be allowed to walk around naked in front of her father and younger brothers.

If it was just Mom and daughter, OK maybe. But it's not.

You got us talking OP. Bravo.

 

[contactmaya]

I think nudism is a valid philosophical outlook and practice. Traditional societies dress scantily and are always in front of their relatives. It does not necessarily lead to incest.

 

[SimonaSimo]

Hi Jess, first, nice to meet you. I read about Sara, I think a solution can be if you more involve her in the domestic activity but always making sure that you are together, like for example cooking or cleaning house, because if she is alone she will do this regardless of the fact of being naked. Instead I think that being in close contact with you she might understand the need to dressed up. I also ask you if your family is often gathered together, such as at lunch and dinner, or maybe watching TV and if like this, how she acts? There are grand parents? What they think about this? Finally I'd like also to ask you if in her school there is a strictly dress code of if she can freely choose what to wear?
Simona

 

[chaosforkissesblog]

I would not say that we are nudest at all, but we all tend to strip as soon as we get home and sleep naked. However, I never let my kids have clothes off around people that don't live in our home(ie mom, dad, and siblings). It is natural for people to look at another's body sexually and it invites inappropriate opportunities. The way she is acting about it makes me think this is more about exploring sexuality than about wanting to be more natural. I would be cautious in this situation because she has not grown up in a home with this being the norm. I would have many, many conversations about when and why she should be wearing clothes (which it sounds like you have done a few times). If it is her exploring her sexuality (which is healthy), I would want to put limits on it and explain those limits for her own safety. As long as she is respecting your concerns, she is probably learning a lot about herself and feeling great about being supported by her parents! http://chaosforkisses.blogspot.com/2015/03/why-your-child-probably-isnt-at-risk-as.html

 

[contactmaya]

I would not say that we are nudest at all, but we all tend to strip as soon as we get home and sleep naked. However, I never let my kids have clothes off around people that don't live in our home(ie mom, dad, and siblings). It is natural for people to look at another's body sexually and it invites inappropriate opportunities.

The way she is acting about it makes me think this is more about exploring sexuality than about wanting to be more natural.

.....

The bolded is something entirely in your imagination. There is no evidence at all that this is the case. You may confuse nudism with sex, but that doesnt meant they are the same thing. I actually find what you say offensive.

 

[ashleyv8]

@silchas can you give me a 1 year update in detail? pretty much of how life is with a clothing optional home, my kid is wanting to be nude at home anytime as well and im trying to deal with it

 

[ashleyv8]

Like im just wondering how it is, do you let her go nude all day or just for meals? where does she sit and move? And also what do you do when visitors come? Idk if my daughters siblings would care or not

 

[oldsmom]

Nope. I am going to be that lone voice and say that I think it's a bad idea. If your daughter wants to be nude in her room, that is fine. But outside of that, I think it's absurd.

My husband likes to not wear clothes when it's just the two of us, but he would never do so around the kids. Our oldest is also prone toward nudity, but we were adamant it be in her room only, and only when she is alone. Frankly, it's weird and a bit rude to push your nudity onto others. I don't want to see it. Most people don't.

These days it's trendy to not oppress the individual, but when that individual freedom ends up making others have to deal with weirdness, it's time to reign it in.

When you daughter gets older, what kind of life do you want for her? For us, we wanted our kids to have the skills and knowledge to fit into mainstream society. It's okay to be different, but it's still important to know what is expected and be comfortable dealing with it. For us, the household is a place to teach those skills. We expect the kids to act at home like they would act in society. No swearing. Be respectful. Wear clothes...

 

[blessedwithboys]

These days it's trendy to not oppress the individual, but when that individual freedom ends up making others have to deal with weirdness, it's time to reign it in...

Thank you for this desperately needed truth bomb!

 

[contactmaya]

We should bring back more oppression.