17-month-old obsessed with educational computer games; what would you do?

3177 Views 10 Replies 10 Participants Last post by RedWine, Jun 17, 2005

loraxc

Discussion Starter · Jun 15, 2005

DD is entranced by the Up to Ten website (http://www.uptoten.com) which features two likable characters (Boowa and Kwala) and a host of semi-educational Flash games. I think the content of the site is pretty harmless and charming, and I like that she will never go into a store and see licensed products for the characters (at least, not yet) so I have thought of it as a benign thing to do for 15 minutes or so when it's rainy outside. Obviously she is not old enough to mouse/keyboard herself, so she sits with me and I "play" the games and talk to her about it. (These are games like, "What noise does the cow make?" and "Where is Kwala hiding?" )

Well, last week the weather was terrible here, so we played Boowa and Kwala a lot more than usual. She liked to play it before, but it was never a huge, huge thing; now she is OBSESSED. She asks for it all the time, and cries and screams hysterically when I tell her it's time to say bye-bye to Boowa and Kwala. I have introduced a timer ("When the timer goes ding, it's time to say bye-bye") and they even have a nice bye-bye song on the site (clever idea!) This has reduced the tantrums a BIT, but not much. And a half hour later, she will ask for it again.

My first issue is: gosh, how much time is okay to spend doing this? What is a reasonable limit? I am not a no-TV mama, but we limit it severely. She probably sees one or two hours a week, if that (half an hour of Elmo or Baby Einstein two or three days a week). She doesn't ask for it much anyway--she is not nearly as interested as she is in this! I don't know what I think about computer time. It's interactive for her and she learns from it, but all that time in front of the screen (if I allowed it, I'm sure she would play for an hour or more a day), being basically passive--I dunno. But then I wonder: how different is it from being read a book? DD will also read books for long, long periods (at least 45 minutes at a stretch). She has a really long attention span. At the risk of sounding egotistical, she is also very bright, and I think she is deeply absorbed in the learning experience of the games. ???

My second issue is: how can I reduce these awful tantrums? Any suggestions? It's hard that it doesn't have a set "beginning" and "ending" sequence like a video or a book does. She will just keep on saying "New game, new game" over and over to get me to play a different game. She loves the novelty of the new games. Obviously I try to entice her away with another activity that she likes, but it doesn't usually work. She is just REALLY into this right now.

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alegna

· #2 · Jun 15, 2005

I would limit it to half an hour a day. I think that's plenty of screen time for a toddler. At her age she can start to understand that you only do things once a day, so after you've played that day you can say- we already did that today. We need to wait until tomorrow. She won't GET IT get it right away, but she'll start to understand.

good luck!

-Angela

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Destinye

· #3 · Jun 15, 2005

DD is also obsessed with Starfall (thanks! lol) I definitely limit it to about 30 mins a day. Luckily DD also likes to go outside so I can distract her with that. She is also very strongwilled and have had issues with tantrums for a while. She is actually better as we have been extremely consistent with her about it and also when she does have a melt down we say I know that you are mad (sad, upset) because you want x but we need to do something else right now, or explain why. I know your DD is extremely bright and will get the gist of what you are saying. I do think acknowledging the feeling helps them a lot. Also I use flower remedies and homeopathy too, so when she has been in a major tantrum phase I have used Chamomilla, for example. It has helped immensely and kept me sane too! When she does have a tantrum though I don't back down (but do distract her) also sometimes she starts and it is something she can have so I try to get her to ask for it in a word or sign or she will say please. Anyhow thats whats worked for us.

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sistermama

· #4 · Jun 15, 2005

I wouldn't let her use it at all for a couple of days, and then if you want I would let her use it for 15 minutes a day or so. Once ds starts throwing temper tantrums for tv, I know that he has been watching too much lately so he goes cold turkey for a couple of days, and then I'll let him start watching again in smaller amounts.

That said, I don't really believe that computer games, especially for toddlers, are the greatest idea. If she likes books, why not spend the time reading instead?

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oldcrunchymom

· #5 · Jun 15, 2005

Hollis loved computer learning software at that age too. He would play it constantly until he mastered the concepts, then get bored with it. We don't limit screen time in our house so that was not a concern.

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Alkenny

· #6 · Jun 15, 2005

I would limit it also, and like a PP said...don't go there at all for a couple of days and maybe she'll forget it?

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starbarrett

· #7 · Jun 16, 2005

!Boowa & Koala! My dd loves them, too. And the theme song is so catchy I sometimes find myself singing it.

:

Personally, I think computer games are way better for people of any age than TV. First of all, it's interactive, not passive (even if dd is directing you instead of the keyboard directly. lol) and therefore is more like a toy than the TV despite the screen. I read somewhere that the brain has less activity when watching TV than when sleeping. Not the case with computers. And also, no commercials. Can't beat that.

So I wouldn't worry too much about her obsession. But if you're concerned, I think limiting it to 30min is perfectly reasonable. Especially if you're sick of playing it! When I don't want dd playing on the computer, I shut the door to the office and it makes it out of sight out of mind. Don't know if that's an option for you.

Good luck!

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TiredX2

· #8 · Jun 16, 2005

Quote:

Originally Posted by starbarrett
!Boowa & Koala! My dd loves them, too. And the theme song is so catchy I sometimes find myself singing it.

Boowa, boo wa wa, boowa and kawala la boo wa boo wa wa KWA LA.

Had to look at this. My kids have been obsessed w/Boowa & Kwala for a looonng time.

We went cold turkey off the computer (for the kids) a couple months ago and are only now adding it back in. My kids tend to really be drawn to stuff that is way too easy for them and to just do it blankly, kwim?

Also, DS could totally use a mouse at that age--- let her try it, she might like it. He was a bit freaky with his, though, that he did get the cause/effect idea of the mouse around 15-16 months (I *think* that's freaky--- I don't really know).

I am pretty anti-screen time because I don't really think they retain as much from it as they do from real live enteractions or books.

Something to look forward to--- when they start singing the odd little Boowa & Kwala songs it is *soooo* cute.

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Starflower

· #9 · Jun 16, 2005

Quote:

Originally Posted by sistermama
I wouldn't let her use it at all for a couple of days, and then if you want I would let her use it for 15 minutes a day or so. Once ds starts throwing temper tantrums for tv, I know that he has been watching too much lately so he goes cold turkey for a couple of days, and then I'll let him start watching again in smaller amounts.

: And I would add that if you do use the computer games, make it a ritual - play the games in the same order each time, only once or for timed amount, and then do the goodbye song. This might establish a beginning, middle and end for this type of play to make it an easier transition.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sistermama
That said, I don't really believe that computer games, especially for toddlers, are the greatest idea. If she likes books, why not spend the time reading instead?

I'm not sure how I feel about the computer games yet. At 18 mos., I think DD was a little too young for the one my mom got us, but now she could use the mouse I bet. DH works at home some days on the computer so she's very interested in the whole thing - usually we just google up images of kittens or something and talk about animals with her on our laps.

As for the books, ITA. But just as a note, our DD gets obsessive about her books! Sometimes she'll tantrum about not getting to read a book (usually Clifford or Little Engine that Could) after we've read 3-5 books already. It's actually been better lately (had to hide one of them for awhile). I just let her fall asleep at night holding her book after nursing and then put it aside once she's asleep.

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loraxc

Discussion Starter · #10 · Jun 16, 2005

Thanks for the replies. I bet she could use a mouse, but right now our only working computer is a laptop, and even I find the stupid touchpad very fiddly...

I'm actually finding that the timer and using the "bye-bye" song has helped a lot. It didn't seem like it at first, but I guess it needed to keep happening that way a lot. I'm still feeling very mixed about how much time I think is "okay." It's tricky.

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RedWine

· #11 · Jun 17, 2005

Hey, I thought we were the only ones who knew about Boowa and Kwala! No one else I've ever spoken to about them knows what I'm talking about.

Dd LOVES them. However, I have always made it part of her naptime routine. She can only play with the site for 30 minutes, as step 1 of her routine. First Boowa/Kwala, then a drink of water, then a few books, then I sing to her, then she falls asleep. So she does enjoy it, but it has it's specific place in the schedule, and she is not allowed to play with them during other times of the day. There have been a tantrum or two when it has been time to stop for the day, but I don't relent, and the tantrums are few and far between.

She's been playing since she was 18 or 19 months. She learned how to use the mouse, drag and click, etc. on her own, by playing with this site. She's 2 1/2 now and still enjoys it, though she is slowly but surely requesting starfall.com instead (the only other site I've introduced her to).

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