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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So, we had our 2 mo. well baby check today. DS is intact - our doc has always been cool/supportive of this. At his 1 mo. check, the doc retracted the foreskin as far as it went on it's own (didn't really push it, just saw where it was at). At that point, he was able to see the tip of the penis. Today, though, in the diaper off check, he tried to do the same thing and the foreskin would not retract. This seemed to worry the doc a bit. We get PLENTY of wet dipes, so there's no problem with elimination. Doc suggested getting a referral for a pediatric urologist to take a look, or wait and see a few months more. Since I'm on maternity leave until the end of February, I said make the referral, since it'll be easier for me to get in to see the specialist.

After he put the referral in the computer, he says something like, "The urologist would be able to determine if he needs to be circumcised or partially circumcised." WHAT?! Any other mama's had this? I'm inclined to go to the urologist (since we're first time parents, and DH is circumcised, and everything is new to us in general!) to make sure all is well, but as long as he's peeing fine and no signs of discomfort/infection ... I'm leaning towards leaving things as they are.
 

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NO! That's crazy. He's not ok with your decision, he's uninformed about normal penises at best and manipulative at worst. If you like him otherwise, I'd print off lots of info about normal intact penises and bring it with me to appts. and refuse genital exams.
 

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Perhaps someone has a link to the Doctors Against Circumcision slideshow on the anatomy of the foreskin for your doctor. He seems to lack some valuable knowledge. There is a band of muscle at the tip of the foreskin that acts as a sphincter. That sphincter was probably just closed up at this appointment and loose at the previous appointment. If he can pee and has no pain leave him alone. As for the Urologist, have you ever heard the expression, "when you have a hammer, everything looks like a nail"?

I was amazed at this sphincter action. I had never heard of it. I just saw it in action one day when my son peed. His opened up right in front of me.
 

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the only person who should retract your son's foreskin should be your son. There is absolutely no need, and possible harm can occur, in retracting the neonate or older child. Full retraction may not even occur until adolescence. There no need to check and no rush for it to happen. I really think there is a serious problem in our family doctors and Ped's not know anything about proper penile/foreskin development in infants and boys. It sounds like he may have cause small tares in the foreskin and it rehealed to the tip of the glans.

Your son does not need to be circumcised or partially circumcised. Other users will be able to provide you with medical references. You should consider contacting Doctors Opposing Circumcision and obtaining information to give your ped, I think there is a lawyer who will provide a pro bono letter to practices where docs are causing foreskin harm due to their own ignorance (maybe someone can provide that link). If he has done this to your son, he is surely doing it to other patients.
 

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It sounds like the doctor tore some of the skin when he retracted the first time and that it healed back to the glans. Your son is perfectly normal and doesn't need a circumcision or a trip to the urologist. Just make sure that everybody including doctors leave his penis alone. It's perfectly normal not to retract in infancy.

You can tear up the urologist referral. But please take some time to educate the doctor. If he's doing that to your son, he's doing it to other boys. You may be able to get with Doctors Opposing Circumcision and have them send him a reprimand letter.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by GoodMomma View Post
Do you know that what your Dr. did was wrong? If he's peeing fine....don't let anyone touch his penis. Maybe start looking for a new Dr?
I agree. I really think this doctor needs to know why what he is doing is wrong.
Last time I took my DS to see our ped (and this was just before I stopped doing WBV), our young ped (who was a resident when we where in the hosp.shortly after DS was born) was finishing the diaper off exam and did something suspicious just as she was pulling the diaper up. DS was not fully retracted, but what I think she was doing was trying to see his meatus. I did not say anything because I was so flustered and emotional from trying to defend our decision on vax, it was too much for me. I only now (since we have left the practice) am working on a letter to address their medical malpractice and ignorance about foreskin development. I feel a responsibility for any other potential intact boys being seen there.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by GoodMomma View Post
Do you know that what your Dr. did was wrong? If he's peeing fine....don't let anyone touch his penis. Maybe start looking for a new Dr?
My family doctor told me over and over BEFORE Ds2 was born DO NOT RETRACT HIM!! To clean him just was it like any other body part DO NOT LET ANYONE RETRACT him at all!! He does check him out at his well visits but does NOT ever touch his penis. If I were you I would find a new ped one who is informed on the care of an intact boy! I am sorry beautiful Liam was put through that
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Thank you, everyone - after reading your replies, and talking to my mom (herself the mother of intact boys), I'm much reassured that my son is normal and fine. We never try to retract at home, since I had read to just leave it be. I don't know where my brain went at the exam. I think my thought was that the doc noticed something I missed... I'll definitely bring in some of the info from Doctors Opposing Circumcision - I think he's probably really just uninformed on this front. Even in a stereotypically "hippie" area such as ours, intact boys are still a minority and our doc does fam practice, so I think many of his patients are much older. He's otherwise very good, non-alarmist, super-pro-breastfeeding, and respectful of parents' decisions in general, and he shares most of our philosophies.

I'd like to hold onto him if he can be educated ... if not, we'll just have to move on. And I'll skip that trip to the urologist!
 

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You can always keep the Dr. and make a no penis touching rule. That is what I have done since my choices are limited for ped. here as is the case of many people sometimes we just have to keep what we have and deal.

Just tell the Dr. that after doing more research you have learned that him messing with our ds foreskin at all is wrong and potentially harmful and you are no longer comfortable with him touching your ds penis at all. I still allow testicle checks or did because of potential hernia but I stand right there and make sure no penis touching happens by blocking with my hands if needed.
 

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Quote:
At his 1 mo. check, the doc retracted the foreskin as far as it went on it's own (didn't really push it, just saw where it was at). At that point, he was able to see the tip of the penis.
He shouldn't be doing this, it doesn't matter how 'gentle' .

He shouldn't be touching it all.

P.S.
You mean the tip of the glans. the foreskin is the tip pf the penis.
 

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Ever notice that when expectant parents are discussing circumcision, one of their biggest reasons to want to circumcise their newborn is "because he will probably have to have it done later anyway"? Well, things like your experience are the reason why "everyone" knows of "someone" whose child "had to" be circumcised later. Problem is, he DOES NOT need a circumcision. Having the foreskin completely fused to the glans is EXACTLY how a baby/young child should be.
Your son if very lucky that you are his mother, that you think enough to question your doctor and his actions and recommendations.
Not every baby is so lucky. If your doctor is retracting, or trying to retract, your baby, and recommending circumcision and urologist visits for a perfectly normal healthy baby, just think how many other babies he is doing this to and how many parents DO take his advice. They may take their baby to the urologist and get him circumcised (because I guarantee that if you take that baby to a urologist he will diagnose phimosis and recommend circumcision. Guaranteed. Unless you find the one-in-billion foreskin-friendly pediatric urologist), or the parents may start worrying about the "non-retractile" foreskin or "phimosis;" they may start retracting their son's foreskin regularly and even washing under it - thus setting him up for scar tissue, infections, and even - you guessed it- circumcision! And then not only do those poor boys end up being circumcised unnecessarily, but they also wind up as more anecdotal evidence of the "if I don't circumcise my son as a baby, he will probably just have to have it done later" version, thus resulting in even more unnecessary genital cutting of newborns.
So, good on you for protecting your son!
Please, for the sake of other boys, do what you can to get some proper information to your doctor! Thank you.

Jen
 
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