[musiclady]

And I'm starting to get freaked out about actually giving birth....

Uhhhh...... I know all about how empowering it is, etc. I'm just really nervous about it. I'm pretty sure we'll end up with the traditional hospital birth, which limits the positions, etc. I need the assurance of trained medical personnel. Unfortunately, that does mean that certain aspects are going to be handled in a more "uniform" way. I'm okay with that, but I'm just really starting to freak out about labor.

Guys, I just need some help. Any reading? Any videos? I've been looking up Lamaze and the Bradley method. Does it work? Is it worth the money?

I'd really like to go as long as I can without drugs, but if necessary, I will take advantage of the epidural. Am I by myself in this freaking out?

 

[Alohamelly]

I did Lamaze with my first and it was not worth it to me. I have always wanted to try Bradley, but never got around to it. I think if you educate yourself as much as you can, you'll be as prepared as you can be. I don't know what else to tell you - you just don't know what's going to happen until you're experiencing it, you know? As for me, I haven't even given the birth much thought. No time to think about it!

 

[amandaleigh37]

I felt the same way you did when I was pregnant with my son. We had him in a hospital, and I did not have an epidural. I was induced (big mistake!) but did have a short labor and vaginal delivery. We took the hospital birth prep class and the breathing really helped, my husband did a great job helping me stay calm & focused.

You might find it helpful/reassuring to read a lot of birth stories.... check out Ina May's Guide to Childbirth.

I think it's totally normal to be nervous/scared even of the unknown ahead

I really believe that being prepared mentally is so important. Start reading and envisioning the kind of labor you want to have, and take comfort knowing that for every person walking around, SOMEONE made it through labor

So you can probably do it too.

 

[mamabohl]

I did the bradley method just from the book (natural childbirth the bradley way), I didn't take the class, and it was so so wonderful. For my first son's birth I took a class that taught some breathing similar to lamaze, which I just found confusing and too hard to remember during labor so I ended up with an epidural. Second son I used the bradley method and just having the different perspective on the contractions and the simple relaxation and breathing techniques were enough to get me through the labor with no pain meds (and this was pitocin induced labor!). I actually found the second labor, where I could feel everything, so much more enjoyable.

 

[Erinz]

Quote:

Originally Posted by amandaleigh37 You might find it helpful/reassuring to read a lot of birth stories.... check out Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. I think it's totally normal to be nervous/scared even of the unknown ahead I really believe that being prepared mentally is so important. Start reading and envisioning the kind of labor you want to have, and take comfort knowing that for every person walking around, SOMEONE made it through labor So you can probably do it too.

I so ditto this. Ina May's book is so completely fabulous and full of wonderful stories. My husband and I took a FABULOUS 8 week birth class from a FABULOUS homebirth midwife the first round and really, I can not tell you how valuable that class was to me. Just having a theme set and feeling comfortable with the process was so..... important. I highly rec a really good birth class (I don't count the typical hospital class to be of the caliber you should be looking for) and lots of reading of positive materials

 

[because]

Bradely is really great for first-timers because it's a good education about what birthing IS. And it creates really good consumers; teaches the questions to ask, etc. I found HypnoBabies to be a better relaxation course *for me* but I think that Bradley does the education part better.

Going to a IRL class gets you around other pregnant women, too. It's like a support group.

Anything by Ina May Gaskin is recommended. And Henci Goer. Lots of good books out there. Check out the book list in "Resources" at the www.birthnetwork.org site. See if there is a BirthNEtwork chapter near you, too.

 

[lachingona1]

Ina May Gaskin is awesome! Her stories are so inspiring! I read them oer and over before I had dd2.

 

[Erinz]

I should have also added that by the end of pregnancy you will be SO READY for that baby to be OUT! haha

You'll be begging for the onset of labor

At least that was me hehe I just couldn't wait to have that enormous weight out of my body and into my arms!

 

[PoppyMama]

I did not/do not enjoy pregnancy or birth so maybe a different perspective...

I found Lamaze useless and Bradley very very helpful in order to feel like I was more in control. Birth still sucked but it doesn't last forever and the SECOND it was over I felt like a whole new -and free- woman. This time I am prepping and controlling all I can and giving myself the freedom to choose to stay home and UC if I want, go the the hospital and be bossy with the staff or get a gnarly epidural and giggle the whole way through. I'm mostly focusing on that second after when it's all over and all worth it.

 

[Erinz]

Quote:

Originally Posted by PoppyMama I'm mostly focusing on that second after when it's all over and all worth it.

My husband said I was like a light switch the MOMENT my son was out. We had a really grueling and long birth and he was in complete fear that I would never be the same again!

As soon as our son was out I was ready to PARTY! I was giddy, talking, estatic, and wanted everyone to come in and see this amazing bundle! I felt as if I could have lifted up the hospital one handed! HA! My husband just started to sob with relief that it was over, and that I was still me!

 

[rivkah]

I recommend reading Ina May Gastin, the Bradley books, and anything else that will just give you a better idea of what labor is all about. I actually liked the book "Husband Coached Childbirth" even though it is at times nauseatingly sexist. It is still informative.

I also recommend searching on YouTube for homebirth videos. You will be surprised at how many there are. The more you see it, the more you will feel comfortable that giving birth is something that your body is perfectly equipped to do. I would not watch a Birth Story! That wold scare anyone.

One comfort I can offer, even though it sounds kind of corny, is that when your body enters into labor, you are really in a sort of altered state. I say this as a person who is not in any way "spiritual." I am a really practical, literal person. However, the effect of all the hormones and chemicals that tell your body that it is time to bring this baby into the world is real. If I had to push 6-10 pounds out of my vagina right now, sitting her at my desk, with my everyday brain functioning, no way could I do it. I'd feel like I was dying. But everything, including your mind, adjusts to labor, and helps in the effort. You won't have time to be scared, because all your energy will be focused towards bringing a baby into this world.

 

[Mama Khi]

I've been thinking about Bradley and the Hypnobabies classes because I've seen them recommended so many times here. Is Hypnobabies the same as Hypnobirthing? Is this something I can learn at home or do I need a class?