2yr Discipline - Help Needed

446 Views 2 Replies 3 Participants Last post by umsami, Apr 5, 2006

InochiZo

Discussion Starter · Apr 5, 2006

I am trying to be as GD as possible. I am definately not perfect. My DS seems very definant. He is also very helpful and caring at times. Maybe I am expecting too much. We generally try to respect each other say please and thank you. I don't see much value in timeouts for DS, although I have sat him down none too gently a few times.
Here are the issues I and DH are having trouble with,
Throwing food and toys
Kicking and hitting
Doing exactly what you asked him not to do. Yesterday, he lifted his book up like he was going to throw it. I asked him not to. He threw it directly at me. I blocked it with my hands but it did hit me. He hit the cat with a bowl a few weeks ago. I have not always had the most GD responses to these issues.
My current solutions have been as follows: Put DS in his room when throwing toys (he usually likes to throw them over the gate) but he'll throw in the room too. Give him alternative items to throw (balls and stuffed animals). He will often start throwing these on the counter, which could break other items. Leave the park if he's throwing barkdust (DH's solution). I tell him I am mad and/or it hurts when he does these things. I sit right next to DS and block throws when he's eating but I really want to do other things. I have not been consistent with this at all.
He is one of kiddos that has always responded to reactions he can get. These things are just really hard not to react to.
He does have a new sister but these were issues prior to her introduction. Having her does make it difficult to be consistent with discipline at times.
Any recommendations would be welcome.
Thanks,

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nwaddellr

· #2 · Apr 5, 2006

At his age, telling him something is not going to be enough to ensure he does it (i.e. don't throw the book - oops, there it goes). You really do have to be proactive and "help" him do the things that should be done. Don't expect him to be able to listen to what you say and then do it. Even if he wants to, his impulse control is so minimal and book throwing seems so fun that it's just going to happen.

One important thing that has helped me is to rephrase everything in positive statements - books are for reading. If you want to throw something, balls are for throwing (and you could even limit it to a room - like his bedroom).

It just takes repetition upon repetition and then they get old enough to internalize the "rules" and it clicks. Good luck!

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umsami

· #3 · Apr 5, 2006

I agree with the above poster.

What I've just decided to try is by making pictures of our three main rules in the house (Main issues with my son):

1) No Biting (Show happy face eating biting an apple.... a giant red X throw a boy biting his Mom)

2) No Throwing Toys In The Living Room (Picture of our living room, giant red X, Boy throwing toy at baby brother)..... (Beside it... happy smiling boy and smiling Mom as Boy throws ball outside)

3) No Hitting (picture of boy hitting Mom with an X... picture of Mom/Dad hitting boy with an X (not acceptable from anybody)... may add a happy smily family, not sure)

We'll talk through them each morning and after each incident. No idea if it will work, but I hope so.

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