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I would like to know if others have had success at helping a 3-4 year old stop waking at night. He is not waking to Pee just to join us in our bed. I have a 20 month old in our bed already so I am not in to this habit. He has been going to sleep in his bed for 6 months now and only once has he not woken up. Any suggestions?
 

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My son is 5 1/2 and goes through periods where he'll start waking at night and come into our bed. I never know if it's a developmental stage, nightmares, or if he's needing extra security, but it seems to happen for a few weeks then stops. In the past I've spent a lot of time trying to figure out what's going on but I've pretty much come to the conclusion that as long as we're accepting of his needs he'll eventually sort himself back out.<br><br>
Since I'm not comfortable having him sleep in the same bed as his baby sister, our solution has been to have a small bed on the floor in our room for him. He gets the message that he's always welcome to be in our room, but he gets his own bed so that we can all get our sleep.<br><br>
Good luck!
 

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I think that seems really developmentally appropriate.<br><br>
As the PP mentioned you could let him have a bed on your floor (my B&SIL had a sleeping bag for my niece until she was 8ish). Or you could take him back to bed and cuddle with him.<br><br>
It sounds like it is really important to him though. If he consistently wakes at the same time, you could try waking up before that time and going into his room so when he woke up you would be right there to reassure him back to sleep.
 

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I'll third the bed-on-floor suggestion. My son used it regularly until his fifth birthday, and occasionally since ten. It started out right next to our bed, then it moved against the wall a few feet away, then it was right outside our door, then it was outside our door with our door SHUT. (So the noise of him going to it does not wake us or our baby anymore.)<br><br>
I think you'll have more luck finding a way to keep him from waking YOU at night than keeping him from waking.
 

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I have no advice. My 5 year old is back in my bed full time. Some nights I really want my space (19 mo nursling there too), but I figure he'll move out when he's ready and for whatever reason, he's not ready yet. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug">
 

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How about keep him in the family bed from start to finish, and see if that stops the nightwaking? Maybe he just needs to be in bed with you all, and that's why he's waking up ...<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br><br>
FWIW, we've got 'em all in with us. There's no rule that says they must sleep on their own at a certain age, YKWIM?<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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i REMEMBER BEING THAT AGE AND CRAWLING INTO BED WITH MOM AND DAD.I THINK IT WAS USUALLY FROM A BAD DREAM.THOSE ARE SOME OF MY FONDEST MEMORIES.SOMETIMES AT 5 YOU JUST DON'T WANT TO SLEEP ALL ALONE...KWIM?THESE DAYS I FANTASIZE ABOUT SLEEPING ALL BY MYSELF ONE DAY.LOL
 

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My dd will be 4 next month and does the same thing as the OP's ds. I wouldn't mind her in the bed except she flops like a fish in her sleep and just this week has punched me in the face and kicked dh in the testes twice. Trust me, that is NOT a fun way to be awakened. It is having a negative impact on our daytime parenting b/c we are not sleeping well at night. I have some sleep issues anyway and after being kicked or hit and awakened I am up for at least 2 hrs.<br><br>
I willl see if we can get her to comply with the mat on the floor. That would be a nice solution.
 

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I have an almost 13 year old that still wakes in the night and comes into my room. I let her join in, cuddle her for a few minutes and then send her on her way (no way that 2 adults, a 2 year old and a 13 year old can fit in there <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> )<br><br>
She's welcome to come in for comfort though, and I don't make a big deal out of it. I think we're some of the oldest co-sleepers around these parts, though. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">
 

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Our dd is 3.5 and still comes into the bed a few times a week varies from once a nite to several.......no specific time she climbs in on dh side...I usually have dd#2 21mos and she goes right back to sleep....they sleep right outside our bedroom door so dh moves her btb after she goes to sleep b/c we have a queen size bed and it's just TO SMALL for the 4 of us...she usually transitions well ......not sure of reason...but past 2 weeks she has started the "I can't sleep by myself" routine so we/I have been laying w/her till she settles down ...that's another post, LOL I wonder if she just feels she needs more "time" w/us and b/c she is in preschool and VERY busy the rest of the time....<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"><br>
I have read of alot of mama's trying the bed/space in parents room w/good success so....good luck to you<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> if you decide to try it<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">
 

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sorry double post
 

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<i>My dd will be 4 next month and does the same thing as the OP's ds. I wouldn't mind her in the bed except she flops like a fish in her sleep and just this week has punched me in the face and kicked dh in the testes twice. Trust me, that is NOT a fun way to be awakened. It is having a negative impact on our daytime parenting b/c we are not sleeping well at night. I have some sleep issues anyway and after being kicked or hit and awakened I am up for at least 2 hrs.</i><br><br>
Oh, gosh! This is EXACTLY how it was with dd1. At five years old, after being awakened more times than I care to remember with a flying foot in my temple (OUCH!), and many, many sleepless nights = worthless mommy, I finally decided to lock my door at night. This is a solution we came up with together in addition to her sleeping with my pillow so she could smell me. Of course, I kept reminding her what we agreed to and why and did a five night countdown. When she would wake up, she would come to my room and knock on the door and I would take her back to her bed and cuddle her so she could fall asleep. Within a week or so, she was no longer waking up in the middle of the night. HTH
 

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Oh, I'm not alone! Thank goodness! If only I had a king size bed, then maybe it wouldn't be such an issue. Dh and I just don't get a good enough sleep with dd crawling into bed everynight in the wee hours. I love having her in bed with us, but at the same time, there's just not enough room for all of us! *Sigh* As my mother always says, "It's only for a time..." (related to all things baby/child) - so true.
 
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