This may sound counterintuitive, but something to try may be to lay off praising so much the "big boy" stuff for awhile and let him be a "baby". Let him wear diapers/pullups, offer to feed him, etc. BUT, then he also has to be on the baby's routine. So when the baby goes down for a nap, he has to go to sleep too because "remember, you are a baby too, right? and babies need a lot of sleep." Also, babies can only do "baby" things, not cool stuff like a "big kid", so if he wants to be a baby, fine, but then he can't do all the fun stuff he usually does too. I am guessing he may change his mind after a little while of that and remembering all the cool things and privileges that come with being older.
3 year old regressing and won't potty train
Our 3 year, 3 month old son seems to have taken a turn. Our younger son is just now a year old and all of a sudden, older son has turned into "a baby". He won't feed himself, won't dress himself anymore, mimics the baby when he cries, sits on me when I nurse the baby, and whines, whines, whines. He refuses to use the potty. That has been a work in progress, but when we occasionally get him to sit on it AND by chance he pees or poops, he will refuse to sit on it for a week at a time, even with huge praise from everyone for going on the potty.
I spend a lot of time with him. We have special mommy/son times. When the younger son naps, I shut of the outside stuff and do things with our older son. I try to encourage all of his "big boy" behavior. Yet he acts like his little brother most of the time and even tells me he is the baby.
I know much of this is normal, but what do I do? My husband is getting angry with him which does NOT work and want to model some other behavior, but don't know what to model. Any sugggestions?
I spend a lot of time with him. We have special mommy/son times. When the younger son naps, I shut of the outside stuff and do things with our older son. I try to encourage all of his "big boy" behavior. Yet he acts like his little brother most of the time and even tells me he is the baby.
I know much of this is normal, but what do I do? My husband is getting angry with him which does NOT work and want to model some other behavior, but don't know what to model. Any sugggestions?
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Lay off the praising and making a big deal about things. We started potty training my daughter around 2 but then she would regress. She went back and forth between working on potty training and refusing. She did that forever and ended up potty training herself at 4 but only after we pretty much let it go. With my daughter, I follow her lead. If she woke up and wanted to be a big girl, then that is what we did. If she woke up and wanted to be a baby, then that is what we did. The less we fussed about it, the better things got. Even now, she will have days where she will regress. I just go with it and she snaps out of it on her own.
I totally agree with the first reply. Though I know it seems to encourage teh baby behavior.My 3.5 year old went through a phase of being a baby again andit drove me BATTY. He went from being totally potty trained to wearing diapers and pull ups all day long, he went from no binkies at all to a binky hanging out of his mouth 24 hours a day. He went from adult glassesto bottles! ARRGGGHHH!!!! I finally threw up my handsand waved the white flag and gave in, I kept the cool big boy undies right in plain view but let him wear his dipes. I handed over the bottles.I went withit. And ya know what?Itturned out he got bored with it pretty fast. He turns 4 next month and he is onlyin pull ups at night, recentlygave up binkies this past week and hasn't had a bottle in a month! I think he was just feeling unsure about this whole growing up businessbut eventually realized it has it's benefits.
Thanks everyone. That does seem to make sense. I've tried to let the potty-training thing go, but I have days I get really mad about it. My husband just seems to be at a loss for any other way to deal with it. The angrier I get, the worse it gets, the worse I feel, and the more I know I'm not helping him grow.
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