[noah's_mama]

I don't post very often, but I really need some advice. My 3-year-old ds has started waking up during the night or early morning (or both) screaming. It's not just typical screaming. It sounds like he's being tortured. Dh and I think that it started with a fear, but now it has become a habit. We're not sure. And we don't know what to do. It has been going on for over a month now, and it's really creating a lot of tension in our family. Dh doesn't do well without sleep, and he's getting really stressed out and depressed. It doesn't bother me in the same way, but mostly I'm just concerned for my ds. He's been a good sleeper since he was 9 months old. We had some sleep issues when ds2 was born (I guess due to anxiety), but those were resolved, and he's been a great sleeper since then. There are no new situations in our family for him to deal with. We have a very relaxed and predictable schedule. He also won't eat anything. He will literally go all day and eat only a couple of crackers and a few bites of cereal. There are VERY few foods he will eat. I think he's just living on milk and juice/water (which I have to limit or he probably wouldn't eat at all). He's always been a really sensitive child. We've tried everything. I just don't know what to do, and I was wondering if anyone else is going through this or has gone through it. TIA.

 

[JessicaTX]

Have you tried taking him to the bathroom? My oldest had night terrors, and occasionally taking him potty would help. My 6 and 8 year old will wake up with nightmares and crying, but are immediately relieved if I take them potty. It might be worth a shot =D

 

[Hopefulmama]

First of all, my heart goes out to your family. We have coped with night terrors since DD was 18 months and now she is 3.5. I've not found much to help. I have read it can be food sensitivity or allergies, but frankly, just when I think I get it figured out, she gets them again. That being said, can you wake him from them, or does he still stay "asleep" but screaming? My DD would have night terrors that you couldn't wake her from. Recently, she wakes up screaming that her legs hurt and her feet tickle. She is coherant. Her ped. said growing pains. She has grown a few inches in a few months. Is your son having a growth spurt? We have had success with massaging and stretching her feet and calves before bed. Then when she is hurting/screaming, we give her a hot water bottle and put it on her legs and feet and that stops in almost instantly. Since we started the stretching every night, she hasn't had an episode in a week, and she was having them nightly before that. So I guess the point of this is, can you determine if it's a night terror or something else? It's a wretched thing for a family to go through. You feel so helpless for your child but you get soooo sleep deprived. Hang in there and I hope you find something that helps.

 

[Cheshire]

Our son has night terrors. He started getting them about 9 months old. They last a few weeks and then he's fine for a while. We've figured out he gets them around periods of growth (mentally and physically). He doesn't remember them in the morning but they are very scary for us because he does sound frantic/troubled. He'll be 5 soon and hasn't had any in about a year but over the last couple of months he's been having the again.

We've found that if we try and comfort him it just makes it last longer. We keep him from hurting himself (he flails around when he has them) and they usually don't last longer than a few minutes. Here lately he's been talking during them (well, more like crying and screaming). If we understand what he is saying we'll answer him and it seems to help, too. For example, one night he kept crying that he wanted them all (whatever it was we never found out) so I just told him "here you go, you can have them all." He settled right back down after that.

I was talking to a friend the other day and her doctor suggested for their kids to turn them over after they've been asleep for an hour or so. He said it interrupts their sleep pattern and usually helps. I don't know if it would work or not but maybe???

 

[Astrogirl]

Our 4 year old has night terrors as well. A quick google search will give you lots of methods for figuring out what to do.

I think the mainstream advice is to never touch them or try to wake them up when they have night terrors. I have also read experience though that some people have had success with squeezing them tight during a night terror.

With our daughter, it happens more if she goes to bed too late - regardless of how much sleep she's had during the day. Once her schedule is out of whack, thats it - we get night terrors. And her schedule is like a swiss watch - very particular!

During a night terror, I recommend your husband wear ear plugs. I don't think there's much you can do at this point if it happens and if you've done your best to prevent it. I lay with my daughter and agree with whatever she is saying - never argue (i.e. say "but there's nothing there"). Luckily our youngest sleeps right through it, or she will get up and go sleep with her dad. Ours last about 15-20 mins, which seems like eternity. I think Cheshire's 2nd paragraph is the way to go, in my experience as well.

Your son sounds like my daughter with the sleeping and eating. I do believe its anxiety related. Even the smallest things will disrupt her - even if its a rather innocuous family argument. What I think it comes down to is that shes very "aware" of things and also very sensitive, so anything that she perceives as shaking the foundation of what she knows ...it makes her anxious. So now we don't argue (or discuss heatedly) around her, or EVER discuss who will do what with the kids (i.e. "i got them ready for school, can't you help them brush their teeth").