Mothering Forum banner
1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,171 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi mamas,

I've lurked on here for a while because I have been a single mama before, and will be again soon.

Here's the problem that I am hoping I can get some advice on-- I'm 37 weeks pregnant. If I wasn't pg I would have left already, but now? I'm kind of stuck. There's alot to the story (of course) but the bottom line is that I need to get out soon, at least I am feeling confident that I'm safe and my DD (and soon to be born DD) is safe for the time being. I had been trying to "stick it out" for a while since I recently became a SAHM and am about to have a baby, so it's been hard to figure out options.

Has anyone else been in this situation? How did you make it through until your baby was born and you were on your feet enough to get out? I'm just so tired and I wish we could just be away from each other so I can take good care of myself and have my baby in peace


Any advice would be appreciated. I feel like my head is
: and I can't even think straight.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
236 Posts
I didn't want to read w/o replying.
Can you move in with a friend or you parents? I know that isn't exactly great either, but would hopefully let you be able to stay at home until you feel you can leave your DD's in somebody elses care.

Don't go through the birth experience and especially the PP time with a partner that doesn't support you. You need people to support you, not make you feel even worse.

HTH

Don't forget to look forward to holding your new baby!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
627 Posts
I just got done reading your blog and I couldn't help but respond.
Please whatever you do, find a way to get out as quickly as you can. I know it's hard but I know you can do it. Starting over is always so very scary but it can be done. I'm sure you'll be so glad that you did.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,335 Posts
I was 17wks along when my stbx left me. I live with my mother still so I had reduced rent (only $150/mo) and was lucky enough to find a job in april (I was 26wks) I would reccommend not waiting. there are shelters if you have nowhere to go. don't wait until you can *get on your feet* b/cuz chances are you never will get on your feet...and the freedom from being out of a toxic relationship is priceless.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,000 Posts
Sorry you're dealing with such a selfish man-child. Hope you find what you need and soon! My ex was sooo selfish when I was pregnant.
I am still annoyed when I think about it. Those were his true colors.

Do you have enough advice, legally and otherwise to make good decisions? Maybe you should call a the local DV agency. Is it New beginnins in Seattle?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,171 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Thank you for the responses. I am just starting to look in to all of this, it's pretty overwhelming. I asked him to move out, so hopefully he will, because DD and I really don't have anywhere to go. My family is all at least 2,000 milkes away
They said they would come and get us, but I don't feel comfortable attempting to travel this late in my pregnancy.

I'm also trying to figure out how much has to have occured in order to get a protection order against someone. I have absolutely zero proof of what he's done (99% of which is verbal abuse and sheer intimidation), or of what he's capable of. It's just that he's a time bomb and I don't want to be around for the end result. Sigh. I wish I could figure out a way to stay here and safely have this baby while making sure he stays away from me.

Any thoughts?

Thank you again!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
236 Posts
mamamilkers,

I read through your last few blog entries.
I can relate in so many ways. I just wanted to give you this

and tell you that even though you are sooo tired now you will be beautiful and strong and everything you want to be during the birth.
I did the hypbirth training towards the very end of my pregnancy. It really helped me believing in myself an my body's abilities, but I ended up not using it during labour. I just wanted to move and experience it as much as possible. I too was so tired at the end of the pregnancy and I even had (not so much D)H at the birth with me, but I was everything I wanted to be and my birth experience was so beautiful.
My first birth sounds similar to yours and I just wanted to confirm to you (probably like many others before me) that no birth is like the other.
It will be so amazing! Everything you want it to be! Enjoy it!

I really hope things work out for you.

I stayed with H and am actually still with him and I am heartbroken thinking about how hard and miserable he made my babymoon. Don't let that happen to you, Mama. Just my advice...

Enjoy those last belly days as much as your life right now lets you!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,802 Posts
I think it would be better to get away from him before the baby is born. You may want to call some help line to find out if the verbal abuse and intimidation can get you a restraining order or not.
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top