[2boyzmama]

My 4 year old son is suddenly starting to show some modesty. It's hit and miss, and doesn't have a pattern yet...sometimes he wants privacy in the bathroom, sometimes he wants daddy to not help him dress, sometimes he wants mommy to not help him dress.

We're not making a big deal out of it, we give him his privacy if he asks for it, but we don't otherwise talk about it.

My question is...I've always "heard" (not sure where though) that once a child starts showing modesty, parents should start to be more aware of being naked around the child. Is this true? I still undress in front of him, breastfeed in front of him, even use the restroom in front of him, it's never been an issue. He doesn't appear to be noticing me much (except pointing out my ever-growing baby bump!) and doesn't appear embarassed at all, doesn't ask anatomy questions...but he is showing those early signs of being aware of his own body.

Suggestions? How are others handling this?

 

[Llyra]

We're very casual with nudity around here. But I've seen what you're seeing-- my 4 year old is slowly becoming aware, and occasionally asking for more privacy. Like all of a sudden last week, she told DH to get out of the room because she was getting dressed, and she's funny about seeing him naked sometimes. A few months ago, she started refusing to let people outside the immediate family see her unclothed, too. But it's inconsistent-- one day she's really insistent about it, and the next she doesn't seem to care. She also asks anatomy questions all the time, about herself, and about her brothers and sisters.

What we're doing is respecting her requests for more privacy when she makes them, but otherwise doing what we've always done. But DH is also being more careful about being naked around her, since that seems like the main thing she's uncomfortable with. We're just playing it by ear, figuring when she needs more privacy, we'll be able to see it.

 

[JamieCatheryn]

I'd just respect the boundaries he suggested at any given time and watch for any sign he was uncomfortable with anything. If he doesn't care if you're naked then don't go out of your way to hide it. Certainly don't hide breastfeeding. But is he avoids looking at you and says something or leaves, respect that boundary.