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A conversation with dp recently gave me the impression that a 4th was not so out of the picture as I had thought. We have two older kids (9 and 7) and one just 2.5 months old. I am thinking that getting pregnant in 2 years would be great. I'd be 37, dp 43. He worries about his age in particular.
I had a great pregnancy and birth last time (easy pregnancy, waterbirth). I had a rough first pregnancy (PUPPP, sciatica) and birth (PPH+++), a decent pregnancy and birth with my second (home birth). My son has neurofibromatosis, but the other kids are unaffected and it was most likely a genetic mutation unrelated to family genetics.
We make fabulous kids and I feel like there is a girl missing. I had a dream when I was pregnant with Alden about a boy and a girl. Very distinct. I have to admit I would be biased about having a girl this last time. I feel horrible about that.
Here are my questions for you Mamas and Papas to answer, if you'd be so kind:
-if you have a large family and had your younger ones later in life, do you regret your age? I can't imagine that I'd feel much different physically in 2 years, but...
-Is 4 much different than 3?
-We aren't very organized, though I am improving all the time. We are a bit ad hoc about meals and bedtimes. Do you have to be really regimented with 4? Or 3 for that matter!
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-Would 3 years between the 2 youngest ones be too much of an age gap to take advantage of them being close in age and therefore more like peer siblings?
I would have all the baby gear still, we have one van that is newish and seats 8 comfortably. Our other car seats the 3 kids in the back barely, but if we needed to use it with 4 kids and I wasn't there, my oldest, then 12 could ride in the front seat. We wouldn't need to buy a thing.
My dp says, "don't you find this an awful amount of work?" and yes I do. The sleeplessness gets to me, but we are coping and I am finding this babyhood just wonderful. The idea that this is my last baby is really hard to endure. It seems to have gone by so fast. I find it hard to get stuff done, but now that we are at 2 months and naps are happening I feel so much better and can grab some time to myself and for the house.
My job. I am a midwife, and work very long hours. But, I am off every 3rd weekend, and work 12 weeks on, 4 weeks OFF. I can decide to work less, if money allows. I would take off 6-8 months after the birth and often have my kids at work with me in the clinic. Dp has been a stay at home Dad for much of our kids' lives and may be in the future. My mom has indicated if he went back to work she would look after the kids, but I am not sure if she is just being generous or not.
We have a house that would accommodate another kid, though just barely. Financially, I'd have to do some wizardry (mostly around taking time off work), but what else is new!
So those are my thoughts (whew!). Care to comment? Thank you.
Carolynn
I had a great pregnancy and birth last time (easy pregnancy, waterbirth). I had a rough first pregnancy (PUPPP, sciatica) and birth (PPH+++), a decent pregnancy and birth with my second (home birth). My son has neurofibromatosis, but the other kids are unaffected and it was most likely a genetic mutation unrelated to family genetics.
We make fabulous kids and I feel like there is a girl missing. I had a dream when I was pregnant with Alden about a boy and a girl. Very distinct. I have to admit I would be biased about having a girl this last time. I feel horrible about that.
Here are my questions for you Mamas and Papas to answer, if you'd be so kind:
-if you have a large family and had your younger ones later in life, do you regret your age? I can't imagine that I'd feel much different physically in 2 years, but...
-Is 4 much different than 3?
-We aren't very organized, though I am improving all the time. We are a bit ad hoc about meals and bedtimes. Do you have to be really regimented with 4? Or 3 for that matter!
-Would 3 years between the 2 youngest ones be too much of an age gap to take advantage of them being close in age and therefore more like peer siblings?
I would have all the baby gear still, we have one van that is newish and seats 8 comfortably. Our other car seats the 3 kids in the back barely, but if we needed to use it with 4 kids and I wasn't there, my oldest, then 12 could ride in the front seat. We wouldn't need to buy a thing.
My dp says, "don't you find this an awful amount of work?" and yes I do. The sleeplessness gets to me, but we are coping and I am finding this babyhood just wonderful. The idea that this is my last baby is really hard to endure. It seems to have gone by so fast. I find it hard to get stuff done, but now that we are at 2 months and naps are happening I feel so much better and can grab some time to myself and for the house.
My job. I am a midwife, and work very long hours. But, I am off every 3rd weekend, and work 12 weeks on, 4 weeks OFF. I can decide to work less, if money allows. I would take off 6-8 months after the birth and often have my kids at work with me in the clinic. Dp has been a stay at home Dad for much of our kids' lives and may be in the future. My mom has indicated if he went back to work she would look after the kids, but I am not sure if she is just being generous or not.
We have a house that would accommodate another kid, though just barely. Financially, I'd have to do some wizardry (mostly around taking time off work), but what else is new!
So those are my thoughts (whew!). Care to comment? Thank you.
Carolynn
