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Discussion Starter #1
<p>Joining!</p>
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<p>Hello ladies, I have been lurking for the past two weeks but need to join finally and have someplace to talk about this little accidental miracle :)</p>
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<p>We definitely wanted a fourth, but didn't plan well and now will be unable to travel home this year to see our families :-(</p>
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<p>Trying to talk my husband into taking the older kids so that they can still see cousins/grandparents, we shall see if he's up for it or not.</p>
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<p>The thing is, I REALLY don't look forward to the conversation I will need to have with my mother about why Eli (my current baby) and I are not coming back this year and there is no way I can sneak off to visit early without having to take all three kids by myself. I should be able to just be happy, but this is seriously stressing me out! I have visions of showing a huge belly-bump via skype sometime in June and letting them figure it out for themselves then. That's probably not the best plan though, right?</p>
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<p>Anyway, nice to meet you all. I still haven't found a clinic, so haven't had my first appointment yet. We are on a military base so I will make an appointment here around 10-12 weeks, but desperately hope to find a nice, relaxing Japanese clinic that will take Americans somewhere near here. Kind of striking out on that one, but I am not shy about asking everyone I meet and I have high hopes that we will find one :)</p>
 

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<p>Congrats!  We went to Japan this summer and loved it. Can't imagine trying to find a birth center there!  I have a friend who lives in Japan, an expat. and she details her birth experience there in a blog if you are interested in reading about it pm me.</p>
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<p>I also struggle with when to tell.  I so want to tell, and yet something holds you back.  Family is especially tricky for so many different reasons.  Hope you find the perfect solution!</p>
 

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<p>I'm just under 6 weeks and it keeps slipping out here and there.  Mostly the people I've told is: DH (obviously), my mom, my bestest girlfriend, my nutritionist, and my Nana.  Was trying to hold out till Christmas (I'll be 9 wks) to tell family only.  It's still a little early (for me personally) but I don't know how much longer we can skirt around the issue.</p>
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Good luck finding a birthing center. </p>
 

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<p>With DS, we wanted to keep it a secret until the end of the first tri.  I didn't even make it to the end of the day after I got the BFP.  But we were able to limit it to just immediate family knowing.  This time, apparently, DH forgot to mention to his dad that this "secret" isn't public knowledge yet, so FIL told his entire (HUGE!) family.  *Sigh*</p>
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<p>Congrats & good luck finding a birth center!</p>
 

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Discussion Starter #5
<p>Thanks everyone for replying!</p>
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<p>We have always told right away, but this time is different b/c of the kink it puts in travel plans.Our two boys I've had over here were Jan and Feb babies and my mom spent the next three month constantly calling me and trying to nag me into getting the Embassy to mail our passports faster. Hmmmm. I just know that when we do tell, it will be however many months of worried calls and nagging about why I can't just come home and have the baby. Maybe that would be a good idea after all?</p>
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<p>Early days still...</p>
 

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<p>DDCC.  I would have liked to be able to hold off on telling, but I felt lousy enough that I had to explain to my supervisors why I was acting so strange, and I would rather tell them than have them think I was being irresponsible. And after I'd told people I didn't feel particularly close to, I wanted to tell those I did feel close to... result, I'm at 11 weeks now and everybody and their uncle knows. Not exactly what I had in mind, but hey, at least I have a lot of moral support.</p>
 

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<p>I will be about 6 weeks on Friday and e wants to wait until Christmas time to tell people.  I didn't think I would make it, but so far I have <img alt="winky.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/winky.gif">  With DD we told our families at about 6 weeks.  DP wants to make sure that this one sticks (I am not worried about this at all) because we are due at the end of July which like you, Novus, is interfering with DP's family reunion the first week in August.  This normally would not be a big deal, but this year his mom is hosting it and she expects all of her kids to be there.  I told DP that if we had that if we already had the baby that he could probably take DD and go, but if we haven't then he, of course, wants to stay with me until the baby is born.  The reunion is about 8+ hours drive from our house and DD's labor was 12 hours.  I imagine that this labor will be shorter, but maybe not.  So, needless to say he wants to make sure there is really a conflict before he tells his mom that we probably can't make it to the reunion.  Which is why we are trying to hold off on telling anyone, but he did say that if I couldn't make that would be okay too--he's a good DP!</p>
 
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