[saritabeth]

Okay I need some guidence here. We sleep with our dd at night. It works wonderfully for us and she sleeps a really good full night...usually 10 -12 hours.<br><br>
Here is my problem. She is totally opposed to napping on her own durring the day. It kind of gradually happened and now she just refuses to sleep on her own durring the day. Now, this could be compounded by the fact that she is also teething right now, and maybe I am expecting too much here. I am just so frustrated because I can't get a grip on my housework and my body is just sore from slinging her around all the live long day.<br><br>
I love her, I am glad that I have choosen a hands on parenting style (we would both be miserable any other way). I do have a lot on my plate here and maybe I just need to surrender to her sleeping in my arms? I just feel that she should be able to take 2 naps a day for at least an hour in durration without me sleeping too. As it is, I end up sleeping the same amount of night time sleep becuase I am so tired from a long day with a high needs child.<br><br>
I have zero time to myself and I am just not sure what to do. I don't like to let her cry, but should she be fussing a bit at this stage?<br><br>
could she just need me more due to the teething??<br><br>
someone tell me I am doing something right please!<br><br>
I am just so tired.<br>
Sarah

 

[Castle]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> It sounds to me like you're doing a lot of stuff right!<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">I just feel that she should be able to take 2 naps a day for at least an hour in durration without me sleeping too.</td>
</tr></table></div>
I think this might be your main issue. Your expectations might be too high. A lot of 7 month old babies don't need to nap that often, especially if they're getting such good nights sleep. She might be at the age where she's transitioning to one nap a day.

 

[saritabeth]

The thing is that she acts really tired, she looks really tired (red eyes, rubbing eyes, cranky). She falls asleep in my arms but wakes the second I try and put her down.<br><br>
Please someone give me some advice. I know that she needs at least 14 hours of sleep and she is really getting 10 - 12 at night (usually 10).<br><br>
Im really at my witts end and the 'best' advice I have gotten is to let her fuss for 30 minutes. I don't feel great about that. I am really looking for someone to give me some suggestions for teaching her how to fall asleep on her own that does not include fussing for 30 minutes.<br><br>
Any ideas??

 

[Glittergal]

saritabeth -<br>
hugs to you! i could have written your post 7 months ago...<br>
my daughter was/is the same way. For the first year, I FOUGHT to get her to sleep. I literally would fret my day away trying to persuade her to take naps. My daughter resists naps at all costs and you know what, once I just decided to make it a non-issue, it was much less stressful for me. I know, I know...there is no personal time, no time to get anything done and lots of fatigue from holding a babe all day. Some things did work for us (sometimes) that would be a lifesaver for me, usually when I thought I was going to crack. Putting her in our asian carrier and jiggling to Shakira (latin pop) - if it works, she falls asleep by the third song and paralized, I can sit down at the computer and at least do some email etc. Driving - this worked from about 8-12 months. I would go on the highway for 20 minutes or so, then go home and park and keep a supply of books in the car. She would usually sleep a total of an hour and I got to relax and read. Or on a not hot/cold day, I would sit outside the car and catch up on phone calls. Another thing that worked for us - rolling her in the baby jogger in the house to Bob Dylan. Again, weird but got her to sleep.<br><br>
Obviously these are all bizarre tricks that we would randomly discovered, but the fact of the matter is, my daughter has NEVER napped more than an hour at a time, has never napped out of arms (except the places above) and she is FINE. I seriously think I stressed about her not napping so much that I got cranky and it rubbed off on her. Once I realized it was not in her nature to nap, we both got on much better <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
At 12 months, she joyfully started crashing at 5 pm - she now sleeps from about 6 pm -7 am (still waking to nurse) and I get lots of evening free time and she clearly gets a good stretch of sleep. It will get better but it is important to realize sometimes you just can't force a baby to sleep! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I hope this helps you a little, if anything to know you aren't alone and you will survice!

 

[saritabeth]

Thanks for the encouragement. Ive been busy with the holiday.<br><br>
she has been doing some napping in the last week (hooray!) but still not what I would really like to see.<br><br>
Im all about being the mommy she needs while also nurturing my needs too. I know there is balance in this and that something will give. Just when I am about to break usually something gives.<br><br>
Thanks<br>
sarah

 

[mittendrin]

no advise, just hugs. i'm in the same boat, my 7 month old thinks he doesn't need naps, too. maybe he doesn't, maybe he does. do you have any "neglectors"? swing, saucer...

 

[irishgreengables]

I feel your pain. My 6m.o. is the same way (although she does not sleep through the night). I just have her sleep on me in my homemade version of the hug-a-bub -- that way, I can still do things (which I need to do because she has 2 non-napping sibs) and she can get her naps in. I know it is not exactly a break for you, but you can still do things -- you just have a baby on the front. Now that she is a bit bigger BTW, we just got the ergo and so she sleeps on my back while I go about my day.<br><br>
Peace,<br>
Paula

 

[saritabeth]

Ella is starting to totally not like the exersaucer/swing/ anything to put her down for 10 minutes while I do something- gadgets. She did a bit better this week...but everything was nutty with my hubby home from work. It was nice, but we are all out of sync here.<br>
I will say that she does enjoy playing in her high chair with cherrio's while I dance and sing around the kitchen doing my cooking thing.<br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shrug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="shrug"> She is attempting to walk...pulling herself up and wanting to walk me all around the house. hopefully she will be a little more tired and at least take one decent nap.<br><br>
Just when I think I know what I am doing I have new things to learn from my child.<br><br>
Oh the other thing I wanted to add was that she is the squirmiest little lady and is starting to flail around in the sling...mainly because she wants to be moving around on her own.<br><br>
Anyway, thanks mama's. It is so helpful to have insights from you.<br>
Sarah

 

[Mere]

You're definitely not alone - I've also got an 8 month old who barely naps. I think there's an expectation that all babies must take two naps a day that are at least an hour long, and therefore when that doesn't happen you can feel like something is wrong. That was my reaction initially, especially since dd1 DID take two looooong naps a day just like "they" say babies should. Then comes ds, who naps for a total of about an hour during the day but sleeps for 12-13 hours (w/wakings of course) at night. As someone else said, you just have to go about your day as best you can and hope they can have a quick nap in some sort of carrier, the car, or whatever. For me, it's definitely not worth it to plan my day around ds' naps that I can never predict anway. When I'm home I can and do put him down to nap in his crib, but it's not that worthwhile since his naps are so short.

 

[clovergirl]

i read this post and thought to myself, "wow, this really sounds familar!" my 10mo old hates napping. she is also the least transferable baby i have ever known... if she falls asleep in the car she will wake up the second i take her out of the seat, even if its only been 5min, and then that is her nap! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br>
so here's my question- will she fall asleep for a nap nursing in bed? this is usually the only way i can get violet to nap alone... i nurse her until she's out, then i sneak off the bed. unfortunately when she naps like this its usally only for a short period of time 30-45min, but its worth it to me because at least i can eat lunch and maybe read a book to my older DD before she wakes up.<br><br>
oh, and i just realized that i think i know you from papaya patch. :LOL if it makes you feel any better, violet normally naps on me in the sling there, because if i try to put her down on the little bed we have she will wake up and then i have to crouch on the floor and try to nurse her back to sleep... not the position i want to be in when customers walk in, ya know?<br><br>
i hope you figure something out. {{{hugs}}}