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<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>*MamaJen*</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1282050/8-more-days#post_16081128"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>As crappy as I'm sure it feels, if you're dealing with the type of abusive narcissist who can just disappear -- like the proverbial guy with a wife and three kids who goes out for a gallon of milk one day and never comes home...well, that sucks. But it's a whole hell of a lot better than the type of abusive narcissist who fights tooth and nail to derail the divorce because he thinks of you as his property. I hope the divorce goes fast and easy for you.</p>
<p>If he does come home, and you feel like you're in danger, or even if he's just being horrible to be around, please remember that you can go to a friend's house or something. Be safe, okay?</p>
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<br><br><p>Time will tell. I think he's probably the type to disappear, because I sense he sees me more as a dead weight than anything else. He probably sees DD as his property but knows that there is no way in hell that he would get primary physical custody. I've had so many health problems while we've been married that I haven't been the trophy wife he thought he was getting, which really irritates him to the point that he probably hates me.</p>
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<p>One of my good friends (a fellow Navy wife, incidentally) gave me the garage door opener to her house so I can hide out there if I ever need to. She's one of the few people who really GETS IT that he is mentally ill, abusive, and therefore potentially physically dangerous. I keep finding myself wondering if he's going to lose his last screw and kill me and/or himself if he feels like he's not winning in the divorce settlement. He hasn't done anything in the past that was super violent, but he is an "all or nothing" type person, and is obviously not mentally/emotionally stable. I hope he is just drinking himself into oblivion and coping that way.</p>
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<p>On a bright note, he's probably convinced himself and his family that I am super controlling, manipulative, deceitful, and abusive, so maybe they've all counseled him to stay the hell away from me, since he's probably told them how he can barely keep his temper under control around me. That would fit well into his superiority complex, since he would have to "rise above" my manipulation tactics. LOL</p>
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<p>The truth about how I feel is that I am so happy to be rid of him! I've only put up with his treating me like crap for as long as I couldn't physically take care of myself. It's stressful, but when he's gone, I don't feel hurt, I just feel free and alive again. Now my only concern in leaving him is financial, and I know I'm in a good community, so I am not worried about it. If my SSDI case gets approved in the next year, that will be enough to live on regardless of what he pays me.</p>
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