Mothering Forum banner

1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
st treatment?

I made an account just to post this here, since I've heard this is the best place to go to ask questions about intact boys.

My 9 year old son has never been able to pee standing up because his pee sprays out at a weird angle and makes a huge mess if he isn't sitting on the toilet and pointing his penis straight down. He recently confided in me that he's been getting picked on by the boys at school for "peeing like a girl" so I took him to a pediatric urologist to see if she could fix the problem.

Obviously, the first thing she did was have him pull down his shorts so she could take a look at his penis. From there, she was able to find out what the problem was pretty quickly. In her words, "a gun won't shoot straight if it's still in it's holster".

So basically, his foreskin is very long (his penis is only about two inches long but his foreskin is about 2 and 1/3 inches long and overhangs in a tapered point that's angled to the right) and very tight (she tried to pull it back and he was in tears before she even came close to exposing the tip of his glans). So when he pees, the foreskin causes the pee to spray out everywhere.

The urologist prescribed a steroid cream (betamethasone) to be applied two times a day to try to loosen the foreskin.
Have any of your sons had this problem with peeing before? Is there a better way than using the cream to fix this? I've found the process of using the cream to be painful and
embarrassing for him.

These are the steps the pediatric urologist told me to do:

1. Have him undress and lay on his bed with his hands under his butt (so if he has a knee-jerk reaction to the pain he won't try to hit my hand away)

2. Hold his foreskin back as far as it can go with one hand and smear on a pea-sized drop of the cream with the other hand

3. Return his foreskin back to it's original position

4. Wait 5-10 minutes for the cream to dry

5. Have him get redressed.

Is this the best way to fix his problem or is there a better way?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
962 Posts
I'm sorry your son is having issues at school, not every male wants to stand at a urinal, my husband always uses a stall and not because he can't stand, he just prefers some privacy. My guess is the boys saw he was sensitive about this and turned it into an issue. They probably asked him why he was always going into a stall and his unsure answer gave them ammunition to tease him with. They probably would have done the same if his feet were overly long or for some other 'imperfection'.

There is nothing wrong with your sons foreskin and her comments about a holster would be laughable if she wasn't a DR. Foreskins come in all lengths and shapes. Some are long like your son's and others are so short they almost look circumcised. She should have told you it's perfectly normal for a male to have a long foreskin and that he will grow into it. When puberty hits his penis will grow a lot and his foreskin will gradually become shorter. perhaps his foreskin will always be a little on the long side just like some ladies have longer or shorter bits. Steroid cream can help the foreskin detach but being attached only becomes a problem once a man becomes sexually active since the whole retraction is for sex. Generally steroid cream used before puberty doesn't do a lot of good because it's going against the body. If his foreskin hasn't yet retracted his body will try and 'restore' it back to how it was before the cream. Once puberty hits the cream works with the hormones, but that is generally only for pain or once turning 18 and retraction is still a problem. Not being able to stand is a slight problem but not one you want to take medical steps to fix. In time his foreskin will fit his penis and he will be able to retract and stand like any other man. Right now trying to fix it is like giving him a nose job. Too young. I think if he could have a better attitude around the other boys this would help a lot, but easier said than done I know. My son is 11 and does not yet retract but he doesn't spray either. His foreskin isn't overly long but certainly goes over the end. It may be the shape of his urethra and not his foreskin at all. The last thing he wants to be doing is trying to pull his foreskin back unless it goes back comfortably. The teenage years is quite normal for full retraction.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
24 Posts
All 3 of my sons had this exact same problem, and I solved it by only letting them "go" sitting down. Once my two youngest started to retract enough to expose the meatus (about 2 years ago), I taught them to pee standing up (which they can only do if they keep their foreskins retracted). My 12 year old DS can still only pee sitting down because he can't retract at all (very similar to how you described your son). Keep us updated on your son's progress, I want to know if the cream is effective.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,955 Posts
Find a better doctor. If I had tried to rub cream on my 9yos penis the shame of that alone might have killed him.

Tell him to pee standing up at school and not worry about raining on the wall. Trust me, far grosser things than pee end up on school bathroom walls!

And teach him some witty come backs to throw at the bullies, something about how it's weird that they care so much about his genitalia.

In a few years hell retract. On his own. When he's ready. No one else needs to handle his stuff until then.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
978 Posts
I am so sorry that your son is being teased for this issue. I hope you can find a resolution. It is not good to be ashamed and self conscious over one's genitalia. I've been there.

In my experience some intact boys, without retracting their foreskin, can pee a perfectly straight stream while others spray. Let me congratulate you on leaving him intact. He is a very fortunate young man. If you are in the U.S. I am impressed that the doctor did not immediately offer to circumcise him. They often do because they are ignorant of less invasive treatments. I have researched methods to treat phimosis extensively because my son was diagnosed thus a long time ago. Even though treatments are more effective on post pubertal boys and often considered premature on a boy of your son's age, they are sometimes effective in dealing with this type of issue.

You might be interested in: www.cirp.org/library/treatment/phimosis . Note that at the end of the article there is a long list of references. There are several papers written about the use of Betamethasone cream. I believe that some doctors recommend applying it several times a day, for a couple of months accompanied by gentle stretching. The process should not be painful. Maybe your son could do this himself.

I am going to try and send you a private message also.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
962 Posts
Children can not have phimosis, that is an adult issue where the foreskin in a grown man can not go back and yes there certainly are many treatments for that. This is a 9 year old boy and if he can pee without pain he has no medical problem that needs chemicals or medical interventions. The real issue is that the US does not understand the normal development of the foreskin. He doesn't need cream he needs a society that does not torment him for having a small physical issue which will resolve as he grows. A boys body needs no help in retracting his foreskin, it does so in it's own time just like a girls body begins menstruation at the time it is ready to.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
978 Posts
All true - However, my line of thought was that even though this treatment may be premature, it may well mitigate the issue of spraying and save the poor boy from the mental anguish that he is currently enduring.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
406 Posts
Not the boy's problem

A boy with a normal penis needs to know that many of the kids around him are part of the dwindling old guard of people cut for no good reason. They have no idea what they're missing. The problem is between the ears of these people. They deserve compassion.

If it was my son I'd tell him to convey that he has nothing to be embarrassed about. The teasing boys should be teased back for their odd fascination about other people's peeing. If they persist, go to the teacher and explain that specific individuals were nosing around in the bathroom instead of minding their own business.

The boy's foreskin will loosen up in time from his own curious manipulations. He should be reminded that he can gently help it along whenever he has some privacy.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
112 Posts
I think I would also leave it be. But if he is insistent about using the cream I would teach him to do it to himself. Having to sit on his hands so he won't react does not sound like a good association for him to be having with someone else handling his penis. I worry that could be just as damaging if not more so than a few stupid boys giving him crap.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
14,239 Posts
The only one who should be messing with his penis at this age is him. You can actually make things worse by trying to force it since you have no idea how far is to far. It can cause tearing leading to infection or scar tissue which can become a real problem which he dosnt have now.
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
Top