Mothering Forum banner
1 - 13 of 13 Posts

· Registered
Joined
·
17 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My 9 y.o. daughter is experiencing unexplainable depression. It is heartbreaking. She is generally fine during the day and then starts to slip around dinner. By bed time she is crying this sorrowful cry. She just says, "I want this to end! When is it going to end, Mama?" I'm trying not to cry myself at this point. We've gone through all the questions of potential school problems, friends, her family, the fact that she's going to a new school next year, puberty fears (she is a long way from puberty). None of these issues is IT. The only thing she says is that she is scared of turning 10 (which isn't for another 5 months!) but I haven't ascertained what it is about turning ten that's scary. I feel like I read a long time ago that some kind of huge shift happens in the brain of a 9 yr old but I can't recall what it is and haven't found anything on the internet. And yes there is depression in the family...i have struggled for years which makes it even more heartbreaking to see it in my usually happy daughter. Ideas? thanks my sisters.
 

· Registered
Joined
·
9,303 Posts
I would be inclided to have her see a doctor. There are a number of things that can cause depression and it could be an organic cause or it could be something in her current lifestyle that's causing it.
 

· Registered
Joined
·
1,945 Posts
I would get her amino acid levels checked asap.

Maybe think about food alergies?

And yes, i would get her some help and somone to talk to.
 

· Registered
Joined
·
2,014 Posts
At that exact age I started having anxiety/panic attacks at the dinner hour. I was afraid to go to sleep and just felt this awful dread/panic and I would cry unconsolably.

My mom didn't do anything about it, so I wasn't diagnosed, but I can tell you now being a grown up that it was a form of anxiety.

It grew into insomnia.

I would see a doctor, even if you end up medicating it doesn't have to be forever.

I had the evening anxiety issues for about 5-6 months and then it let up.
 

· Registered
Joined
·
92 Posts
My daughter was very wistfull at this age and seem depressed...sad...frustrated....and confused about these feelings as I was frankly (her feelings that is).
I found this article helpful. Even now with my 9 yo son he seems somes deperately sad and confused by these strong emotions but manifest it differently...

http://waldorf2.intercast-media.com/..._old.html#more

Good luck
mlsantarem
 

· Registered
Joined
·
246 Posts
Your poor daughter. My daughter went through this insisting that she didn't want to grow up, but it was very short-lived and nothing like your daughter is going through. Many on this thread have suggested medical doctors, but I would try finding a counselor instead. This is my personal opinion, and I know many will disagree, but too often doctor solutions involve medication (and not in this case but in many others, surgery) when it is not necessary.

When looking for a counselor, start with people you know and trust (your school nurse, your pastor, etc.). Good luck!
 

· Registered
Joined
·
308 Posts
I am sorry your dd is going through this. I have a 9 yo ds, so this really struck a cord with me. I, personally, remember 9 being a very difficult and transformative year for me. I think others have made very good suggestions regarding the rahima baldwin article and seeking out amino acid therapy/nutritional approaches. There are many things you can do to support her through what she is going through. Good luck!
 

· Registered
Joined
·
564 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by chiromamma View Post
A great article on the nine year change by Rahima Baldwin

http://www.informedfamilylife.org/20..._year_old.html
I really enjoyed this article - very relevant.
Thank you for posting it.
It does seem as though 9 yr olds are sort of going through the "middle age" of childhood. It's kind of mid-life crisis type of thing. I can recall feeling that way myself. There's a brain growth spurt around this time that ushers in new capacities for logic and reasoning and I do remember going through a transition time around then as I shifted away from magical thinking. It was a very bittersweet time.
 

· Premium Member
Joined
·
16,847 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by chiromamma View Post
A great article on the nine year change by Rahima Baldwin

http://www.informedfamilylife.org/20..._year_old.html
I was going to suggest the 9 year old change.

My DD just yesterday was very depressed, and she is also 9, we also went through a list of things, and could find nothing. I gave her some flower essences and they seemed to be a temporary help. I think it was Gorse, and Mustard?? I don't have them in front of me.
 
1 - 13 of 13 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top