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My GMIL didn't have either of her son's circ'ed in the 50's. Her doctor said it wasn't necessary so she didn't do it. But he also told her you had to retract to clean. Bleh. Both ended up circ'ed anyways. One at about a year old and one when he went into the army. All of this I already knew.<br><br>
So we talked again the other day and she told me more. I was explaining to her why you aren't supposed to retract to clean and she was pretty upset. She said she knew it wasn't right when she was doing it and she felt horrible but she "had to". Which I understand, doctors can be pretty damn convincing. One of her boys, the one who was circ'ed at a year old, didn't have any real problems. No infections. No problems pulling back to clean. He started ballooning and the doctor said he had to be circ'ed. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> The other one was a different story. He had a bunch of infections and fought her every time she had to clean him. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> Poor kid. But she really didn't know any better. I have no idea why the doctor didn't recommend circ'ing him when he was so quick to circ the one who actually didn't have any problems. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">: Weird. Not that I think either should have been circ'ed but you know what I'm saying.<br><br>
Here's the most important part of the story: She said she felt horrible because she felt like she was abusing him. She said it felt like she was RAPING him.<br><br>
Why people think doing ANYTHING like this to little boys is ok is beyond me. Circ, forcibly retracting. It's all horribly violating. I'll never get it.<br><br>
I reassured her it was ok and she just didn't know. She's not as close with that son and she thinks he subconciously remembers all that and resents her for it.<br><br>
How do people who KNOW still do this? How can they live with themselves? Specifically doctors. Ya know, the ones who hear the screaming and see the blood. How do they sleep at night? So, so sick.<br><br>
Ugh, done ranting now.
 

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bandgeek;7329485 Here's the most important part of the story: She said she felt horrible because she felt like she was abusing him. She said it felt like she was RAPING him. [/QUOTE said:
<br><br>
That is really, really sad. It brought tears to my eyes.<br>
I hear what you are saying about how do certain docs do what they do.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mecry.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="crying"> that is just heartbreaking- I can't imagine living back in the 50s...I really feel sorry for all of the mothers who were coerced into unintentionally harming their sons like that and I can't imagine the damage that did to the psyche's of the poor babies who had to go through it as well.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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I am in the medical field and had nine years of education beyond high school, I have worked in health care for 15 years....I was unaware that the foreskin was adhered to the glans until I started reading the anti-circ debates on another board I am on. In all my training and education, circumcision received only a passing mention (in a pro-circ perspective, mind you) and we never learned the intricacies of the newborn male anatomy (except to look for undescended testes). I guess I thought the foreskin was free-floating (not adhered)....until I learned differently from AP moms who were championing the anti-circ cause.<br><br>
So, I imagine a lot of layperson parents are similarly unaware that foreskins are designed to stay put on the newborn male......or, that retracting the foreskin is incorrect care....or that circ'ing requires that the foreskin is bluntly dissected off the glans. If moms knew this, perhaps mother's intuition would tell them that circ'ing is an invasive, unnatural procedure.<br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> to your family
 

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My DH is intact, and he didn't even know you weren't supposed to retract to clean. I can only imagine some poor mother who knows little to nothing about male anatomy to start with, doing what the doctor tells her is best for her little boy.<br>
This really just emphasizes the responsibility of doctors to make SURE they are well informed.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>bandgeek</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7329485"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Here's the most important part of the story: She said she felt horrible because she felt like she was abusing him. She said it felt like she was RAPING him.</div>
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I've heard about mothers helping restrain their children for genital cutting, so forcefully retracting a child's foreskin, particularly at the insistance of a trusted-doctor-god doesn't surprise me.<br><br>
It does seem unfathomable though that people are becoming so far removed from natural, primal instincts, common sense, & compassion that they could do such things.<br><br>
Jen
 

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Oh, Jen, I know. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"><br><br>
I have heard SOOOOO many mothers IRL (I imagine their are some dads out there, too!) who have said they felt so bad for their little boys while sitting in the waiting room... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:<br><br>
LISTEN TO THOSE INSTINCTS! The ones that tell you to protect your baby from harm and run far, far away from the cutters... <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/gloomy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Gloomy">:<br><br>
I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but I needed to say it anyways.
 
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